Pistonheaders and their First World Problems.

[northwest monkey]

mko9 said:

AstonZagato said:

I bought a new Mini for my kids to drive. I noticed that the Navigation and iPhone integration is better than in either my Range Rover or my Aston. That left me feeling rather disaffected.

What did you expect? The Mini is German and the other two are British. If you wanted to have the superior vehicles you should have bought them a Fiat, or something. Maybe a Dacia Sandero?

Good god man, people in ISIS treat their women folk better than that.

[central]

Electrical equipment "bleeping"

[Galileo]

My daughters thumb nails grow faster than her finger nails. And this upsets her. I'm shocked and disappointed that I fathered an imperfect child.

[The Moose]

My glass was filled too full. When I went to take a sip, I got a bit of bolly fizz in my eye. Someone was fired.

(The above is completely true. Other than the firing - I took pity...this time)

[DUMBO100]

The venue told the pilot they wanted £500 landing fee. It's cheaper to land at Heathrow! Parking the Chopper ain't half pricey

[texaxile]

wolfracesonic said:

It took my butler two pushes of the ignition button to light the wok ring on my Smeg hob tonight. Any ideas? Thinking of leaving it at the end of the drive for the scrap men TBH.

Fixed that for you.

[5potTurbo]

I'm off to Roland Garros for the French Open tomorrow, with full hospitality from the main sponsor.
I have to slum it on the Metro from Gare de l'Est to Porte d'Auteuil. I always see nasty things on the Metro.

[berlintaxi]

5potTurbo said:

I'm off to Roland Garros for the French Open tomorrow, with full hospitality from the main sponsor.
I have to slum it on the Metro from Gare de l'Est to Porte d'Auteuil. I always see nasty things on the Metro.

You should be fine Chelsea are in Australia.

[FBP1]

One of our previous au pairs wants to visit us in September, but it would be the same week as our new au pair starts. Naturally, we have spare bedrooms, but it's not ideal as that first week with a new au pair is crucial for explaining the logistics of her new job to her - i.e. where the best local delicatessen is, and so on.

[stuart313]

I took £200 out of the cash machine and it dispensed in tenners, my first thought was fk, they take up too much room in my wallet.

[stuart313]

FBP1 said:

One of our previous au pairs wants to visit us in September, but it would be the same week as our new au pair starts. Naturally, we have spare bedrooms, but it's not ideal as that first week with a new au pair is crucial for explaining the logistics of her new job to her - i.e. where the best local delicatessen is, and so on.

On the upside there is always a chance of a threesome.

[mattdaniels]

We live in a hard water area and the butler is having terrible trouble cleaning water marks off of the Aston's grille. I suggested mineral oil and vinegar but he didn't have any to hand.



To compound matters, tonights salad tastes funny.

[Pesty]

I'm in Budapest

All the women are models

I'm fat and ugly

Fml

[Captain Muppet]

stuart313 said:

I took £200 out of the cash machine and it dispensed in tenners, my first thought was fk, they take up too much room in my wallet.

[The Moose]

Captain Muppet said:

stuart313 said:

I took £200 out of the cash machine and it dispensed in tenners, my first thought was fk, they take up too much room in my wallet.

I bloody hate it when you get fivers out of the cash machine. Pain in the arse.

You just know you shouldn't be where you are

[Rostfritt]

The Moose said:

I bloody hate it when you get fivers out of the cash machine. Pain in the arse.

You just know you shouldn't be where you are

I love getting fivers out, especially in an area which is suffering from a shortage, means you don't end up with a pile of pound coins when buying a sandwich.

[texaxile]

What's a "fiver"?.

[Asterix]

The Moose said:

Captain Muppet said:

stuart313 said:

I took £200 out of the cash machine and it dispensed in tenners, my first thought was fk, they take up too much room in my wallet.

I bloody hate it when you get fivers out of the cash machine. Pain in the arse.

You just know you shouldn't be where you are

We have the opposite here in Dubai - ATMs only giving out AED 500 notes (£100 near as damn it) when you're just about to get a taxi. No one accepts them as they never carry enough change.

[Blown2CV]

if you're getting £10 notes, you're in a council estate. If you're getting £5 notes, you're in a student area.

[MrBig]

texaxile said:

What's a "fiver"?.

A piece of toilet paper. HTH.