Discussion
paps said:
Anyone fostering or have experience of it?
My local authority are always looking for careers, just wondering what it's like.
Friend of the family does it. Bloody hard but very rewarding. The kids vary enormously.My local authority are always looking for careers, just wondering what it's like.
Two were well mannered, very polite, suffering from grief (parent died, no immediate relations) but bounced back.
Others have been violent, to them and other members of the family. Some are very destructive. Looking at the spectrum of backgrounds they have had, it is not surprising.
been a foster carer now for about 7 yrs,
cant really say on an open forum much about it but just as a guide , the kids you will look after are not nice people , just took me a few minutes to think how to put that without sounding snobby,
we only do short term which can be upto 2 yrs , only up to 6 yr old.
its amazing how manipulative a 4 yr old can be , how damaged they are at that age , how violent and nasty .
but some can be just scared ,
its satisfying when we can get one adopted to a nice family and out of the hell hole they have come from .
if you do it be prepared for the review meetings you have with the parents, who will attack you ,
our house is on a police watch type thing due to us being threatened with being burnt down by one lads uncle who saw us as child snatchers and not the childs mothers problem at all .
satisfying but frustrating as well , social workers seem to have their own time , not connected to the world time ,
I could write a book on social workers and have no respect for them at all .
if you need to talk to me about it , pm me and ill tell more
cant really say on an open forum much about it but just as a guide , the kids you will look after are not nice people , just took me a few minutes to think how to put that without sounding snobby,
we only do short term which can be upto 2 yrs , only up to 6 yr old.
its amazing how manipulative a 4 yr old can be , how damaged they are at that age , how violent and nasty .
but some can be just scared ,
its satisfying when we can get one adopted to a nice family and out of the hell hole they have come from .
if you do it be prepared for the review meetings you have with the parents, who will attack you ,
our house is on a police watch type thing due to us being threatened with being burnt down by one lads uncle who saw us as child snatchers and not the childs mothers problem at all .
satisfying but frustrating as well , social workers seem to have their own time , not connected to the world time ,
I could write a book on social workers and have no respect for them at all .
if you need to talk to me about it , pm me and ill tell more
Coming from the other side we have a child in Local Authority care and despite every professional opinion to the contrary the LA have decided that fostering is the best way to care for him. They achieve this by not telling the potential carers anything about him - my wife has fielded a string of calls from the carers over the past couple of months and on every occasion has confirmed that the behaviour is well established and documented in his file.
The official line is 'every child matters'. The reality is 'spend as little as you can get away with, and if lying and bullying helps then go right ahead'. There are some good social workers out there, but there are far too many tipping the balance the other way.
The official line is 'every child matters'. The reality is 'spend as little as you can get away with, and if lying and bullying helps then go right ahead'. There are some good social workers out there, but there are far too many tipping the balance the other way.
Thanks for the replies; I work closely with social workers, children and families teams, so I'm well aware of the issues that come up with them. Even as a professional they can be very difficult to contact. Do you have a right to see the child's file before accepting them or does that breach confidentiality?
paps said:
Thanks for the replies; I work closely with social workers, children and families teams, so I'm well aware of the issues that come up with them. Even as a professional they can be very difficult to contact. Do you have a right to see the child's file before accepting them or does that breach confidentiality?
your case worker should go through the file with you. You have an absolute right to see it.My parents do it. Some ups a lot of downs. A lot of people abuse the system and some people use the adoption/fostering service as their form of contraception.
A smile can make it all worthwhile, bit you will also have to deal with the offspring of the dreggs of society.
Harsh but true.
spike50 said:
been a foster carer now for about 7 yrs,
cant really say on an open forum much about it but just as a guide , the kids you will look after are not nice people , just took me a few minutes to think how to put that without sounding snobby,
we only do short term which can be upto 2 yrs , only up to 6 yr old.
its amazing how manipulative a 4 yr old can be , how damaged they are at that age , how violent and nasty .
but some can be just scared ,
its satisfying when we can get one adopted to a nice family and out of the hell hole they have come from .
if you do it be prepared for the review meetings you have with the parents, who will attack you ,
our house is on a police watch type thing due to us being threatened with being burnt down by one lads uncle who saw us as child snatchers and not the childs mothers problem at all .
satisfying but frustrating as well , social workers seem to have their own time , not connected to the world time ,
I could write a book on social workers and have no respect for them at all .
if you need to talk to me about it , pm me and ill tell more
Wow, that's quite a hard core read.cant really say on an open forum much about it but just as a guide , the kids you will look after are not nice people , just took me a few minutes to think how to put that without sounding snobby,
we only do short term which can be upto 2 yrs , only up to 6 yr old.
its amazing how manipulative a 4 yr old can be , how damaged they are at that age , how violent and nasty .
but some can be just scared ,
its satisfying when we can get one adopted to a nice family and out of the hell hole they have come from .
if you do it be prepared for the review meetings you have with the parents, who will attack you ,
our house is on a police watch type thing due to us being threatened with being burnt down by one lads uncle who saw us as child snatchers and not the childs mothers problem at all .
satisfying but frustrating as well , social workers seem to have their own time , not connected to the world time ,
I could write a book on social workers and have no respect for them at all .
if you need to talk to me about it , pm me and ill tell more
Much respect to you.
I foster have done for a few years {5}, described perfectly on here by spike50.
I would approach a private agency rather than local authority, tend to give better support,
and your allowance is almost double compared to local authority, not that the allowance is a reason to foster
but if you decide its for you,then you may as well get a higher rate for doing this.
Must be forums on the web,worth joining and talking to others who have done this to give you a better insight into this career ,
Myself another 2-3years and I think that will be my contribution to the care system.
I would approach a private agency rather than local authority, tend to give better support,
and your allowance is almost double compared to local authority, not that the allowance is a reason to foster
but if you decide its for you,then you may as well get a higher rate for doing this.
Must be forums on the web,worth joining and talking to others who have done this to give you a better insight into this career ,
Myself another 2-3years and I think that will be my contribution to the care system.
Life Saab Itch said:
paps said:
Thanks for the replies; I work closely with social workers, children and families teams, so I'm well aware of the issues that come up with them. Even as a professional they can be very difficult to contact. Do you have a right to see the child's file before accepting them or does that breach confidentiality?
your case worker should go through the file with you. You have an absolute right to see it.My wife was threatened with jail time for abandonment (yes - seriously) by our social worker's boss when she met with a potential foster couple and explained our son's issues leading them to pull out.
Didn't realise there was such a difference between agency and LA in terms of allowance. How can that be?
I work with young people who have problematic substance misuse issues and have spent the last 6 yrs working within the housing/homeless sector so I've got a good idea of the types of people and families that end up in care situations, just not sure I want to bring it all home to my door step. I think whilst we don't have kids of our own it might be something to consider.
I work with young people who have problematic substance misuse issues and have spent the last 6 yrs working within the housing/homeless sector so I've got a good idea of the types of people and families that end up in care situations, just not sure I want to bring it all home to my door step. I think whilst we don't have kids of our own it might be something to consider.
you should be told everything the social worker knows about the child and have a copy of the relevant paperwork before you accept said child.
in reality if the social worker and 2 police officers turn up at your door at 2 am with a child then no , you ll get a visit the next day with some hastily made up paperwork .
we do council social work , yes its about half what we would get compared to private but we did not start this for the money but purely as a payback to society.
and yes we have seen kids in care that should not have been in care , twice , and we worked with the parents to get them back to the parents as quickly as possible but im sure if you ve worked with social workers then you will know the move with all the speed and work ethic of a glacier.
on a separate note , ive never met a bunch of workers who have as much time off sick as these social workers , everyone we deal with seem to have 3 weeks off holiday then another week or 2 off sick , any other industry these people would be sacked, if your trying to arrange meetings or get paperwork done they really are a nightmare to work with
in reality if the social worker and 2 police officers turn up at your door at 2 am with a child then no , you ll get a visit the next day with some hastily made up paperwork .
we do council social work , yes its about half what we would get compared to private but we did not start this for the money but purely as a payback to society.
and yes we have seen kids in care that should not have been in care , twice , and we worked with the parents to get them back to the parents as quickly as possible but im sure if you ve worked with social workers then you will know the move with all the speed and work ethic of a glacier.
on a separate note , ive never met a bunch of workers who have as much time off sick as these social workers , everyone we deal with seem to have 3 weeks off holiday then another week or 2 off sick , any other industry these people would be sacked, if your trying to arrange meetings or get paperwork done they really are a nightmare to work with
spike50 said:
you should be told everything the social worker knows about the child and have a copy of the relevant paperwork before you accept said child.
in reality if the social worker and 2 police officers turn up at your door at 2 am with a child then no , you ll get a visit the next day with some hastily made up paperwork .
we do council social work , yes its about half what we would get compared to private but we did not start this for the money but purely as a payback to society.
and yes we have seen kids in care that should not have been in care , twice , and we worked with the parents to get them back to the parents as quickly as possible but im sure if you ve worked with social workers then you will know the move with all the speed and work ethic of a glacier.
on a separate note , ive never met a bunch of workers who have as much time off sick as these social workers , everyone we deal with seem to have 3 weeks off holiday then another week or 2 off sick , any other industry these people would be sacked, if your trying to arrange meetings or get paperwork done they really are a nightmare to work with
I work with ASW's everyday in a clinical role.in reality if the social worker and 2 police officers turn up at your door at 2 am with a child then no , you ll get a visit the next day with some hastily made up paperwork .
we do council social work , yes its about half what we would get compared to private but we did not start this for the money but purely as a payback to society.
and yes we have seen kids in care that should not have been in care , twice , and we worked with the parents to get them back to the parents as quickly as possible but im sure if you ve worked with social workers then you will know the move with all the speed and work ethic of a glacier.
on a separate note , ive never met a bunch of workers who have as much time off sick as these social workers , everyone we deal with seem to have 3 weeks off holiday then another week or 2 off sick , any other industry these people would be sacked, if your trying to arrange meetings or get paperwork done they really are a nightmare to work with
i feel unable to share my view of their practice on a public forum.
Make of that what you will.
Biscuits55 said:
spike50 said:
you should be told everything the social worker knows about the child and have a copy of the relevant paperwork before you accept said child.
in reality if the social worker and 2 police officers turn up at your door at 2 am with a child then no , you ll get a visit the next day with some hastily made up paperwork .
we do council social work , yes its about half what we would get compared to private but we did not start this for the money but purely as a payback to society.
and yes we have seen kids in care that should not have been in care , twice , and we worked with the parents to get them back to the parents as quickly as possible but im sure if you ve worked with social workers then you will know the move with all the speed and work ethic of a glacier.
on a separate note , ive never met a bunch of workers who have as much time off sick as these social workers , everyone we deal with seem to have 3 weeks off holiday then another week or 2 off sick , any other industry these people would be sacked, if your trying to arrange meetings or get paperwork done they really are a nightmare to work with
I work with ASW's everyday in a clinical role.in reality if the social worker and 2 police officers turn up at your door at 2 am with a child then no , you ll get a visit the next day with some hastily made up paperwork .
we do council social work , yes its about half what we would get compared to private but we did not start this for the money but purely as a payback to society.
and yes we have seen kids in care that should not have been in care , twice , and we worked with the parents to get them back to the parents as quickly as possible but im sure if you ve worked with social workers then you will know the move with all the speed and work ethic of a glacier.
on a separate note , ive never met a bunch of workers who have as much time off sick as these social workers , everyone we deal with seem to have 3 weeks off holiday then another week or 2 off sick , any other industry these people would be sacked, if your trying to arrange meetings or get paperwork done they really are a nightmare to work with
i feel unable to share my view of their practice on a public forum.
Make of that what you will.
i wonder how long the involvement of social workers in mental health will count now RMNs Psychologists and OTs can be AMHP trained...
My parents used to foster.
Im an only child through adoption and they thought i needed an at home sibling as a better way to socialize me to things.
I remember my dad saying to me that social services workers are bds and the money you get for doing it is never worth it, but protecting some very fragile vulnerable kids and teens with kids was rewarding in itself.
Im an only child through adoption and they thought i needed an at home sibling as a better way to socialize me to things.
I remember my dad saying to me that social services workers are bds and the money you get for doing it is never worth it, but protecting some very fragile vulnerable kids and teens with kids was rewarding in itself.
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