You find a suitcase with £1 million in it. What would you do

[Matt UK]

RSoovy4 said:

mrmr96 said:

cirian75 said:

a cool mill?

well there is no way that is legal

Indeed. The kind of person who has £1m in a suitcase and then loses it is not going to be the kind of person who's going to report the loss to the police. They are also not the kind of person who'll think much of killing you to retrieve it. They would also be unlikely to thank you for handing it in.

Those factors would probably feature strongly within my thinking:
No good having £1m but getting murdered for it.
No good handing £1m in but getting murdered for it.

Very much this.

Such a find might end up being a curse, because you would always be looking over your shoulder.

Very much agree.

Might be tempting to hide it and after a few years go back and see if its still there. If it is...

[elephantstone]

I would live like a rock star for a year and probably explode from all the coke i have been whiffing. The End.

ETA Probably run off to south america or thailand and find a way to have the money put into an account and live like a rock star and travel around causing mischief.

Edited by elephantstone on Thursday 31st October 15:16

[MajorProblem]

I'd be able to afford a Porsche 911 from Specialist cars of Malton or an M3 CSL from Hexagon but probably not both.

Edited by MajorProblem on Thursday 31st October 15:34

[KingNothing]

cocopop said:

Wouldn't buying a house in cash raise some eyebrows, as would trying to pay £1 million into your bank? (genuine question)

Would probabley be easier to buy some land and build a house, get a loan to pay the council for the land legitimately, pay back with the suitcase money, then pay all the different contractors cash in hand for the work?

[PoleDriver]

Pay £2k/month into 3 separate bank accounts.
Take out some ISA's and pay cash into them monthly.
Use cash to pay for everything.
When enough saved up in banks use that to buy land.
Have house built and pay the builders in cash (I'm sure they wouldn't complain).
Decorate/furnish the house paying in cash!

[Art0ir]

Put money into girlfriend's account each month to cover all bills.

Straight away doubles my money to play with in my own account. This could be used for whatever I wanted I guess, or just save a good chunk more of it.

Petrol, groceries and other necessities all paid for with cash.

[N88]

A common lawyer said:

B17NNS said:

Out of interest how do criminals legitimise large sums of cash?

They start cash-heavy businesses. Like laundries. Hence "money-laundering". Recently, it seems, they just pop along to HSBC, who open up a special fund just for them. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-18880269

I've done lots of POCA investigations and seizures, so I guess the answer is "most of them struggle"

I always thought the term was due to the fact they are 'cleaning' the money. I suppose both fit!

[benters]

i might be tempted to upgrade my Sky package. . .but clearly it wouldn't cover everything they offer !

[DannyScene]

Buy a house 200K ish

Buy a RenaultSport Clio 200 in white, alien green or liquid yellow with all the packs etc for weekends

Buy a 335D in white with red leather, probably Msport pack as well for during the week and of course remap it

Buy a little apartment or similar in amsterdam

Continue to live as I am now just with cars and my own houses and half a mil in the bank, would be rather nice at 23

[boobles]

DannyScene said:

Buy a house 200K ish

Buy a RenaultSport Clio 200 in white, alien green or liquid yellow with all the packs etc for weekends

Buy a 335D in white with red leather, probably Msport pack as well for during the week and of course remap it

Buy a little apartment or similar in amsterdam

Continue to live as I am now just with cars and my own houses and half a mil in the bank, would be rather nice at 23

But isn't this the way most typical PHers live anyway?

[Busso GTA]

boobles said:

But isn't this the way most typical PHers live anyway?

All the powerfully built ones

[Muzzer79]

robinessex said:

Ok, fun question! You find a suitcase with a million quid in it. No possible way anyone could know you've got it. What would you do? And before you ask, no I bloody well haven't found one!

Herein lies the key.

All those worrying about the mob or generally looking over your shoulder - there's no way anyone could know you have it?!

Ergo, hide it somewhere (safety deposit box, etc) and cream off relatively small amounts regularly that will not arouse suspicion.

It's the long game, but you'd have to give it a go.

[73mark]

Muzzer79 said:

Ergo, hide it somewhere (safety deposit box, etc) and cream off relatively small amounts regularly that will not arouse suspicion.

It's the long game, but you'd have to give it a go.

Gotta be the best way

[k-ink]

Make sure every cash transaction or bank deposit is under £4999 to avoid the tax man automatically being told. Open dozens of bank accounts and deposit this amount daily into each one. I'd also make a trip into London every day to buy £4999 worth of gold coins - one batch per day from various different dealers. That will be your job for a while. I'd also look to buy a yacht for cash from a dodgy Russian broker. Then sail away.

Or just brazenly buy three pubs with your stolen (or drugs) money and let the income stream in. I actually know someone, who knows someone, who did this.

[northwest monkey]

cocopop said:

Wouldn't buying a house in cash raise some eyebrows, as would trying to pay £1 million into your bank? (genuine question)

Yes it would!

Better off laundering it & paying tax etc, or just using it for all your purchases for as long as it lasts.

[Camoradi]

I'd get my valet to have it delivered to my suite at the Ritz

[Monkeylegend]

Paying in 2k a month even into 3 bank accounts will take about 14 years, and would probably raise suspicions after a while, especially if it is £50 denominations.

All notes will probably be redesigned in the meantime, raising further suspicions as to where you got them all from.

Yep, I would definitely just keep the suitcase,




And a handful of notes,





A big handful,




Two handfuls,



I would use the case to keep them in,



fk it, might as well keep the lot.



Anyone on here launders banknotes?

[cjb1]

keep it, buy a fleet of my favourite cars, buy several large houses, a hanger to keep the cars with all the amenities, party 'tiol I drop, chase wild women, drink as much as I can, take up gambling then just squander the rest I suppose?

[boobles]

Busso GTA said:

All the powerfully built ones

And with goatees.

[MaxFromage]

I can think of plenty of ways of laundering it. One example:

Matched betting- local bookies and some 'friends' vs multiple online accounts. The money over time becomes electronic funds and in the meantime is laundered. Lots of ways to move it to you if you don't mind giving a fair chunk away to the helpers...


My choice would be the local police station and see what happens from there...