Jobs-worth LOLs

[WinstonWolf]

matchmaker said:

Moonhawk said:

omgus said:

This

One of the company sites was marked down for an audit in April for having no COSHH on hand soap and then in June a different audit pulled aside the manager and told him that he was going a bit OTT on the HSSE and used the example of the hand soap COSHH sheet he'd been told to make 10weeks earlier.


Some H&S is brilliant but so many (normally jobs-worthy) people have managed to create jobs for themselves because of 'elf'n'safety and they don't have a fking clue about how to actually implement or use it sensibly.

Yep. If H&S rules are implemented in a silly way - people lose respect for them overall and so instead of making the situation safer, by over egging the pudding, people may actually be making things worse.

The application of H&S rules should be commensurate with the risk.

I'm still waiting to find the fist example of a "Caution - Wet Floor Sign" sign. Such a sign would be placed next to the actual "Caution - Wet Floor" sign - in response to somebody tripping over said "Caution - Wet Floor" sign.

You'd then need a "Caution wet floor sign sign" sign

Such a thing exists. This sign warning cyclists of signs in the cycleway was the only sign in the cycleway

[omgus]

WinstonWolf said:

Such a thing exists. This sign warning cyclists of signs in the cycleway was the only sign in the cycleway

[RenesisEvo]

I received one of those red Post Office cards indicating I'd missed a delivery. No problem - I decide to head over to the depot the next day.

Next day I arrive, and get to the counter, and present the card, and ID.

Employee: "Sorry but you have to wait 24 hours before you come and collect, it says on the card."

Me: "It has been 24 hours already" and I point to his large wall clock. [A combination of planning and good fortune saw me at the counter about a minute after 24 hours had elapsed from the time written on the card.]

Employee gives me an evil look, wanders off with the card, and lo and behold, returns with the item! Was he just trying to get out of doing his job?

[Jamster123]

R1 Indy said:

Do I mind a tradesman I'm hiring parking on my drive, of course not........


Would you be happy paying a tradesman to be going for a 10 min walk each time he needs something from his van, just so he is not parked in a shared residents car park?

Don't get me started on traffic wardens,

We are doing a job in centre of glasgow, Two fully signed vans parked around 5 seconds from site, Fairly obvious we are working there..had he shouted we would have heard. Full parking permits on display, not to mention we had been there for weeks.

One bay is at the end, with no useable space to the right hand side. We are unloading bathroom suites etc all day long from the vans side door. So our vans end up LITERALLY 6" over the white lines to aid unloading, rather than potentially dent our vans and the public cars. Both vans over the lines, in the direction of free space, so not obstructing any other spaces.

Apprentice informs we warden at the vans, I go out offer to move ..."too late you are illegally parked I have pictures". Very heated arguments then begin, all the guy can repeat is "you were illegally parked and your on cctv"

Absolutely no logic applied nor reasoning with this knob.

Immediate phone call to parking services ..."you were illegally parked please file your complaint in writing"


I give up.

£120 in fines.

[Jamster123]

R1 Indy said:

Do I mind a tradesman I'm hiring parking on my drive, of course not........


Would you be happy paying a tradesman to be going for a 10 min walk each time he needs something from his van, just so he is not parked in a shared residents car park?

Don't get me started on traffic wardens,

We are doing a job in centre of glasgow, Two fully signed vans parked around 5 seconds from site, Fairly obvious we are working there..had he shouted we would have heard. Full parking permits on display, not to mention we had been there for weeks.

One bay is at the end, with no useable space to the right hand side. We are unloading bathroom suites etc all day long from the vans side door. So our vans end up LITERALLY 6" over the white lines to aid unloading, rather than potentially dent our vans and the public cars. Both vans over the lines, in the direction of free space, so not obstructing any other spaces.

Apprentice informs we warden at the vans, I go out offer to move ..."too late you are illegally parked I have pictures". Very heated arguments then begin, all the guy can repeat is "you were illegally parked and your on cctv"

Absolutely no logic applied nor reasoning with this knob.

Immediate phone call to parking services ..."you were illegally parked please file your complaint in writing"


I give up.

£120 in fines.

Edited by Jamster123 on Friday 31st October 16:10

[honest_delboy]

Honestly don't know wether to laugh or cry at some of these. Are we really the species that split the atom?

Not me but a friend:

pub:

my mate: "2 pints of XYZ please"
barmaid pours 2 pints, my mate gets the exact money ready and prepares to give it to her
barmaid "whats that?"
my mate "£4.76 , the money for the drinks?" (worked out from the price on the blackboard X 2)
barmaid "I'll be the judge of that!" - goes off to till, taps a few buttons and comes back
barmaid "that'll be £4.76 please"

[1878]

At work recently I saw a "Caution - wet floor" sign ... in the showers in the changing rooms

[s p a c e m a n]

OpulentBob said:

PomBstard said:

Antony Moxey said:

Antony Moxey said:

PomBstard said:

All that jazz said:

I kid you not, you have to dress up like an oil rig worker to load.... bags of cement.

Stuff.

I don't see the big deal meself. I work in quarries and landfill sites regularly so know to take the appropriate kit with me and ensure I'm wearing it when walking around. Now it's second nature and I don't even think about it any more. In fact, I've been on closed sites where the level of PPE is more relaxed and it feels strange not needing a hard hat and hi-viz etc

Or perhaps someone who just gets on with it without making a song and dance about PPE that your company provided for you anyway. I see drama queens like you every time I visit sites who think they're better than everyone else and that the rules don't apply to them.

The example of different PPE requirements for closed sites is risk assessment working - no need for a hard hat if there's nothing to fall on you.

More sensible stuff

Completely agree.

H+S isn't to cause people a pain in the arse. It's to stop people being hurt or killed. I've known people break legs from falling down open manholes, fracture skulls from hose joints bursting, seen a guy crushed by a 20T 360 excvator, seen a colleague hit by a car at 50mph. All could have been prevented/mitigated.

When it happens to you, and you then realise how important good H+S/PPE/staff protection is, it stops being jobsworth.

I've done a lot of quarries/aggregate/cement stuff over the years and it's easy to see the companies that employ a regional HSE who has nothing else to do. It works well when they're given a big enough area to keep busy or have two job roles, but when they struggle to find anything constructive to fill their time with all they do is make things more dangerous by over complicating things that they've never done. Cemex is one of the worst for it, they have more accidents caused by pointless health and safety than anywhere else that I've worked, all because their HSEs are office workers who know nothing more than how to wander around thinking of ways to prove their worth. You must wear these ear protectors, even though the noise is well under the daily threshold limit and you need to hear alarms. Why didn't you hear that alarm?

[ch108]

My dad was a factory engineer. The H&S person told him off for not wearing his ear defenders in a particular area of the factory. He pointed out that he had just dismantled the only machine in that area that usually made the noise that the ear defenders needed to be worn for! Backed up by the fact that half the machine was spread on the floor that the H&S person had to walk round to speak to him.

[simoid]

WinstonWolf said:

All that jazz said:

nick s said:

Stopped at Burger King for a quick snack of 6 chili cheese bites. Got in the drive-thru queue and made my order at the remote speaker box thingy. There was a big line of cars in front of me. As a result, 15 mins after placing my order, I still wasn't even at the payment window.

Noticed the restaurant was completely empty inside, so swung out of the queue, parked up and ran in. Told the gormless student behind the till that the queue was too long and that i'll just pay in here and collect them. I could actually see them sitting on the rack behind him.

"Sorry, I can't do that. You'll have to go back in the queue outside."

"But they're right behind you there?" (me pointing)

"I know, but I'm not allowed to take payment in here for a drive-thru order."

"Oh ok then. I'd like to make a new order then please. I'll have 6 chilli cheese bites."

He takes payment and hands them over. Absolutely ridiculous!

In a similar vein, drive-thru places that won't let you order on foot when you're in something too big to physically fit down the lane, such as a truck. McDonalds are particularly random for this - some branches they start chanting the "company policy" about why they're not allowed to serve you and yet other branches just get on with it and don't care.

(Of course this is only when the restaurant side has already closed, before some smart-arse says).

I've had this when on a bike at a McDonalds They caved when I said "I've queued, I ain't moving till you serve me"

If I had a drive thru in my restaurant, I'm not sure is be particularly happy with pedestrians and motors in the same queue. Especially when many of them are likely to be drunk, and it's dark...

No pedestrians in drive thrus goes in my "not jobsworth" pile I'm afraid

[simoid]

Jamster123 said:

Don't get me started on traffic wardens,

We are doing a job in centre of glasgow, Two fully signed vans parked around 5 seconds from site, Fairly obvious we are working there..had he shouted we would have heard. Full parking permits on display, not to mention we had been there for weeks.

One bay is at the end, with no useable space to the right hand side. We are unloading bathroom suites etc all day long from the vans side door. So our vans end up LITERALLY 6" over the white lines to aid unloading, rather than potentially dent our vans and the public cars. Both vans over the lines, in the direction of free space, so not obstructing any other spaces.

Apprentice informs we warden at the vans, I go out offer to move ..."too late you are illegally parked I have pictures". Very heated arguments then begin, all the guy can repeat is "you were illegally parked and your on cctv"

Absolutely no logic applied nor reasoning with this knob.

Immediate phone call to parking services ..."you were illegally parked please file your complaint in writing"


I give up.

£120 in fines.

Edited by Jamster123 on Friday 31st October 16:10

Literally 6 inches overhang? I'd have told him to fk himself and take it to the ombudsman person.

[WinstonWolf]

simoid said:

WinstonWolf said:

All that jazz said:

nick s said:

Stopped at Burger King for a quick snack of 6 chili cheese bites. Got in the drive-thru queue and made my order at the remote speaker box thingy. There was a big line of cars in front of me. As a result, 15 mins after placing my order, I still wasn't even at the payment window.

Noticed the restaurant was completely empty inside, so swung out of the queue, parked up and ran in. Told the gormless student behind the till that the queue was too long and that i'll just pay in here and collect them. I could actually see them sitting on the rack behind him.

"Sorry, I can't do that. You'll have to go back in the queue outside."

"But they're right behind you there?" (me pointing)

"I know, but I'm not allowed to take payment in here for a drive-thru order."

"Oh ok then. I'd like to make a new order then please. I'll have 6 chilli cheese bites."

He takes payment and hands them over. Absolutely ridiculous!

In a similar vein, drive-thru places that won't let you order on foot when you're in something too big to physically fit down the lane, such as a truck. McDonalds are particularly random for this - some branches they start chanting the "company policy" about why they're not allowed to serve you and yet other branches just get on with it and don't care.

(Of course this is only when the restaurant side has already closed, before some smart-arse says).

I've had this when on a bike at a McDonalds They caved when I said "I've queued, I ain't moving till you serve me"

If I had a drive thru in my restaurant, I'm not sure is be particularly happy with pedestrians and motors in the same queue. Especially when many of them are likely to be drunk, and it's dark...

No pedestrians in drive thrus goes in my "not jobsworth" pile I'm afraid

it was daylight, I was sober and I'd queued with all the other vehicles I'd arrived with.

Rules are for the guidance of wise men and the blind adherence of fools.

[StottyEvo]

speedyguy said:

AbarthChris said:

StottyEvo said:

Not allowing bikes to use the lower car rate completely bypasses common sense, unless theirs a more time consuming and expensive procedure of strapping bikes down.

If their isn't, then entire company is being very awkward

Thank you! finally someone with common sense. There is no difference for cars or bikes, the pricing is based on 2 people sharing a cabin as its an overnight trip.

So to the company, whether its a car or a bike makes no difference. He asked about strapping the bike down too, the woman said that didnt matter.

I think it is you missing the point completely as a private company their mission is to empty your pockets as much as possible why should they do you a deal to save you money and lose them money because you couldn't comply with the deal requirements ?

I see hotel deals all the time for dates/ie conditions i cannot make but i don't worry about it.

A common theme on the threads about jobs is "If you don't like it leave it" i think the same applies in your scenario "If you don't like the deal applying to cars and not motorbikes leave it" ?
Private company their rules and conditions if it doesn't break any laws ?

Have you tried the "Discrimination card" yet

I think you're missing the point.

It reminds me of the Royal Mail fiasco recently. With their new pricing a cylindrical object would be cheaper to send than a smaller rectangular object. To the point that you could put the smaller rectangular object inside the cylinder and send the package for cheaper there was an outcry as this bypassed all common sense.

I gave them the benefit of the doubt as I figured maybe the cylinders could be packaged differently making them easier to transport. In this instance, he's clarified that the bike takes no extra securing, and if he put it in a van then it would be cheaper.

It's not about it being a private company and their rules, its about their rules being completely retarded. Which they are

I think we all realise that the private company can make what ever rules they want (within the means of the law) although I thought that this was an established baseline that you didn't need to point out.

[Pit Pony]

PAULJ5555 said:

I dont buy any food drink when I go to the cinema because its a rip off. If they just charged normal prices I would buy popcorn/drinks/icecream and so would more people.

So the question is would they make more money if they lowered their prices?

Yes, maybe. I doubt they've done a price verses demand experiment, to find out.

[jogger1976]

Two particular examples that I can think of, both involving petrol station attendants.

First one was about 6 years ago. I ran out of fuel (yes, I know) and had to walk to the nearest petrol station (BP) with my jerry can.
I verified that the container was OK and filled up with my 5 litres. When I tried to pay my card was declined. Tried twice more and still declined. Luckily I had some cash on me, so I carefully counted out what I thought was the correct amount, only to find that I was 5p short. I apologised and said that perhaps I could fill out a form and return the money on my way past the next day. I even offered to leave my driving licence so I would have a reason to return.
The cashier refused to budge, then became quite shirty, saying loudly to all the people in the queue that I was attempting to obtain fuel without the means to pay and she would be calling the police if I attempted to leave the site!!!!
Eventually the bloke behind me got so pissed off with waiting that he gave her the 5p! Needless to say I've never run out of fuel since

The second one was at my local Sainsbury's. I popped in to pick up some petrol for my uncle's lawn mower. I got the jerry can out of the car and waited for the pump to start. After a while the pump was still not authorised. I tried to walk towards the kiosk to show the attendant the jerry can, only to be shouted at over the tannoy "go back to your vehicle, you are not allowed to walk with containers around the site"
I tried to point out that the container was empty and I was just trying to attract her attention, but she continued ranting.
After waiting an age for the pump to be verified I went over again to gain her attention and tell her I wanted 5 litres of petrol, only to be told that I needed to wait for authorisation.
Eventually another member of staff came out, but said they couldn't authorise the sale as the container was marked "DIESEL"

[simoid]

WinstonWolf said:

it was daylight, I was sober and I'd queued with all the other vehicles I'd arrived with.

Rules are for the guidance of wise men and the blind adherence of fools.

Sorry shouldn't have quoted you as you weren't a pedestrian. I still think it's a wise man's rule not to allow pedestrians and cars to mix

[Phunk]

In Subway a few years ago with a Jewish friend who can't eat pork.

They had a special 'Sub of the day' which was £1.99 for Turkey and Ham. Friend asks for the turkey and ham without the ham.

Idiot behind the counter says that he'd need to charge her £2.99 for a Turkey sub as that's how much they were.

No amount of arguing would resolve this so we just walked out pm left the subs on the counter without paying.

Morons

[Supernova190188]

RobinBanks said:

Daniel1 said:

James2593 said:

Ki3r said:

James2593 said:

This happened last year, buying the weekly food shop with the GF and in the with the shopping was some beer. As the old woman at the till scanned it, the conversation went like;

Her: How old are you?
Me: 20, why?
Her: Have you got any I.D for this?
Me: Yeah, [goes into wallet] why did you need to ask me my age if you're going to ask for I.D anyway?
Her: Because if you're younger than 21, I need to see some I.D, and you said you were 20.
Me: I am. But what if I just said I was 22, then you wouldn't want the I.D.
Her: ....[blank look]... Then i'd know you were lying and ask for your I.D.
Me: You wouldn't, because you wouldn't even ask for it if I said I was older than 2..1....... *sigh* Never mind.

Either she was really thick, or taking this challenge 21 too literal. I'm used to being asked for I.D, i've had it for 3 years now, ask for it or don't. Stop fking around with this challenge 21, 25 bks.

To be fair, its not the cashiers fault. They are told if you sell to someone who looks under 21/25 without ID'ing you'll be bent over and fked.

I look under 21, if she asked me for some I.D straight away, there'd have been no problem, the jobsworth bit is the fact she asked me my age unnecessarily.

If I was 17, and when she asked my age I said I was 22, then she doesn't ask for I.D, it makes the whole process flawed.

Sounds to me she was just asking you for ID. The fact she asked your age first was just a way of starting the conversation.

Some people now do seem to believe that legally you must be asked for ID if you look under 25.

A few months ago I was in tesco , the lady in front of me had a bottle of wine , then the girl scans it and turns to the woman on the till behind her and says "do I need to ask for ID" , "umm no, love" replied the other woman. The lady buying the wine was easily pushing on 80. Not a jobsworth , just a dull girl! made me laugh out loud at the time.

[HTP99]

Supernova190188 said:

RobinBanks said:

Daniel1 said:

James2593 said:

Ki3r said:

James2593 said:

This happened last year, buying the weekly food shop with the GF and in the with the shopping was some beer. As the old woman at the till scanned it, the conversation went like;

Her: How old are you?
Me: 20, why?
Her: Have you got any I.D for this?
Me: Yeah, [goes into wallet] why did you need to ask me my age if you're going to ask for I.D anyway?
Her: Because if you're younger than 21, I need to see some I.D, and you said you were 20.
Me: I am. But what if I just said I was 22, then you wouldn't want the I.D.
Her: ....[blank look]... Then i'd know you were lying and ask for your I.D.
Me: You wouldn't, because you wouldn't even ask for it if I said I was older than 2..1....... *sigh* Never mind.

Either she was really thick, or taking this challenge 21 too literal. I'm used to being asked for I.D, i've had it for 3 years now, ask for it or don't. Stop fking around with this challenge 21, 25 bks.

To be fair, its not the cashiers fault. They are told if you sell to someone who looks under 21/25 without ID'ing you'll be bent over and fked.

I look under 21, if she asked me for some I.D straight away, there'd have been no problem, the jobsworth bit is the fact she asked me my age unnecessarily.

If I was 17, and when she asked my age I said I was 22, then she doesn't ask for I.D, it makes the whole process flawed.

Sounds to me she was just asking you for ID. The fact she asked your age first was just a way of starting the conversation.

Some people now do seem to believe that legally you must be asked for ID if you look under 25.

A few months ago I was in tesco , the lady in front of me had a bottle of wine , then the girl scans it and turns to the woman on the till behind her and says "do I need to ask for ID" , "umm no, love" replied the other woman. The lady buying the wine was easily pushing on 80. Not a jobsworth , just a dull girl! made me laugh out loud at the time.

She was probably actually under 18 and was getting authorisation to sell it, from someone who is over 18.

[Zoobeef]

Phunk said:

In Subway a few years ago with a Jewish friend who can't eat pork.

They had a special 'Sub of the day' which was £1.99 for Turkey and Ham. Friend asks for the turkey and ham without the ham.

Idiot behind the counter says that he'd need to charge her £2.99 for a Turkey sub as that's how much they were.

No amount of arguing would resolve this so we just walked out pm left the subs on the counter without paying.

Morons

I assume it's because a turkey and ham has 3 slices of each (guess) and he was given 6 slices of Turkey? Making it a turkey sub and not a turkey and ham minus the ham.