Jobs-worth LOLs
Discussion
TwigtheWonderkid said:
She has to scan the crisps in order to get the meal deal price. Otherwise she's right, you'll be charged full rate for the drink and sandwich. Not her fault really.
I tried to buy a ham and pickle sandwich at the Station Café, St Helen's station. Was told they don't do pickle. So I asked for ham and mustard. No mustard either. I was then told that they don't serve "fancy stuff".
My own fault I suppose, going in there with my poncy London attitude and expecting exotic food like pickle and mustard.
I tried to buy a ham and pickle sandwich at the Station Café, St Helen's station. Was told they don't do pickle. So I asked for ham and mustard. No mustard either. I was then told that they don't serve "fancy stuff".
My own fault I suppose, going in there with my poncy London attitude and expecting exotic food like pickle and mustard.
been to that cafe a hundred times. The woman was right, no fancy stuff 
nice breakfast tho 
I once worked in the centre of town. They were refitting the multi story car park so it was closed for ages. There were even stories in the local paper about how it took longer than building the Empire State Building. During this time everyone parked wherever they could which usually meant on yellow lines.
One day I parked the car in my usual but temporary space. I noticed that there were also more than a dozen cars parked on yellows as was the norm at the time. I was then approached by a policeman:
-move your car now or I'll fine you!
-....... The car parks closed and there's no where else to park
-I don't care move now!
-err ok...... What about everyone else then?
-I don't tell you how to do your job so don't tell me how to do mine
A group of us bought a McDonald's late one night and were asked if we wanted to eat in or takeaway. We opted to eat in thank you very much. As soon as we started eating the guy moping the floor told us we had to leave as they were closing. My friend is but of a hot head and started arguing the fact that we had only just sat down after being given the option of doing so.
The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
One day I parked the car in my usual but temporary space. I noticed that there were also more than a dozen cars parked on yellows as was the norm at the time. I was then approached by a policeman:
-move your car now or I'll fine you!
-....... The car parks closed and there's no where else to park
-I don't care move now!
-err ok...... What about everyone else then?
-I don't tell you how to do your job so don't tell me how to do mine
A group of us bought a McDonald's late one night and were asked if we wanted to eat in or takeaway. We opted to eat in thank you very much. As soon as we started eating the guy moping the floor told us we had to leave as they were closing. My friend is but of a hot head and started arguing the fact that we had only just sat down after being given the option of doing so.
The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
I used to be a facilites manager (managing buildings). One such building had a policy of needing 24 hours notice for contractors coming on to site to carry out work.
One of our lifts got stuck and we needed to get lift engineers out on an emergency call to free the occupants. One of the jobsworth security staff refused to let them on site as we hadn't given the required 24 hours notice!
The bloke refused to see the difference between a planned job, and an emergency.
One of our lifts got stuck and we needed to get lift engineers out on an emergency call to free the occupants. One of the jobsworth security staff refused to let them on site as we hadn't given the required 24 hours notice!
The bloke refused to see the difference between a planned job, and an emergency.
BlackST said:
TwigtheWonderkid said:
She has to scan the crisps in order to get the meal deal price. Otherwise she's right, you'll be charged full rate for the drink and sandwich. Not her fault really.
I tried to buy a ham and pickle sandwich at the Station Café, St Helen's station. Was told they don't do pickle. So I asked for ham and mustard. No mustard either. I was then told that they don't serve "fancy stuff".
My own fault I suppose, going in there with my poncy London attitude and expecting exotic food like pickle and mustard.
I tried to buy a ham and pickle sandwich at the Station Café, St Helen's station. Was told they don't do pickle. So I asked for ham and mustard. No mustard either. I was then told that they don't serve "fancy stuff".
My own fault I suppose, going in there with my poncy London attitude and expecting exotic food like pickle and mustard.
been to that cafe a hundred times. The woman was right, no fancy stuff nice breakfast tho She genuinely looked at me as if I was completely mental.
dai1983 said:
A group of us bought a McDonald's late one night and were asked if we wanted to eat in or takeaway. We opted to eat in thank you very much. As soon as we started eating the guy moping the floor told us we had to leave as they were closing. My friend is but of a hot head and started arguing the fact that we had only just sat down after being given the option of doing so.
The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
What a tool!The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
Moonhawk said:
We go to the Broadway Cinema in Letchworth quite a lot (an independent cinema - funded from the Letchworth heritage fund) - Its a great cinema with a fantastic screen, £5 a ticket for mid week showings (even at that price you can still get 2 for 1 on orange Wednesdays) ........and they have a bar 
Only reason we didn't go there last night was because they only have 3 screens and had stopped showing this particular movie.
Must be local, that's the place I was about to mention.Only reason we didn't go there last night was because they only have 3 screens and had stopped showing this particular movie.
Axionknight said:
dai1983 said:
A group of us bought a McDonald's late one night and were asked if we wanted to eat in or takeaway. We opted to eat in thank you very much. As soon as we started eating the guy moping the floor told us we had to leave as they were closing. My friend is but of a hot head and started arguing the fact that we had only just sat down after being given the option of doing so.
The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
What a tool!The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
Many years ago I was in the post office with my two month old daughter (she'll have her 21st birthday this year) and her mother. We were organising the mail forwarding service as the new house move was but weeks away. Being a baby, my daughter had plenty of hospital/health clinic type checks and injections ahead of her and all appointment cards were addressed to her directly, so her name needed to be included on the forwarding service.
Obviously each name on the form needed an authorising signature next to it and the chap behind the glass insisted that I, as a parent, couldn't couldn't sign on my daughter's behalf and she'd have to come in and sign it herself. So I picked her up off the floor in her carrycot and asked him for a pen.
Obviously each name on the form needed an authorising signature next to it and the chap behind the glass insisted that I, as a parent, couldn't couldn't sign on my daughter's behalf and she'd have to come in and sign it herself. So I picked her up off the floor in her carrycot and asked him for a pen.
Impasse said:
Many years ago I was in the post office with my two month old daughter (she'll have her 21st birthday this year) and her mother. We were organising the mail forwarding service as the new house move was but weeks away. Being a baby, my daughter had plenty of hospital/health clinic type checks and injections ahead of her and all appointment cards were addressed to her directly, so her name needed to be included on the forwarding service.
Obviously each name on the form needed an authorising signature next to it and the chap behind the glass insisted that I, as a parent, couldn't couldn't sign on my daughter's behalf and she'd have to come in and sign it herself. So I picked her up off the floor in her carrycot and asked him for a pen.
Obviously each name on the form needed an authorising signature next to it and the chap behind the glass insisted that I, as a parent, couldn't couldn't sign on my daughter's behalf and she'd have to come in and sign it herself. So I picked her up off the floor in her carrycot and asked him for a pen.
been there, done that! although my son was four at the time.98elise said:
I used to be a facilites manager (managing buildings). One such building had a policy of needing 24 hours notice for contractors coming on to site to carry out work.
One of our lifts got stuck and we needed to get lift engineers out on an emergency call to free the occupants. One of the jobsworth security staff refused to let them on site as we hadn't given the required 24 hours notice!
The bloke refused to see the difference between a planned job, and an emergency.
I've been in that situation. I was working round the corner from a client and the office rang me to say they had an urgent need for me to go in. When I turned up they wouldn't let me in because I hadn't given them enough warning. One of our lifts got stuck and we needed to get lift engineers out on an emergency call to free the occupants. One of the jobsworth security staff refused to let them on site as we hadn't given the required 24 hours notice!
The bloke refused to see the difference between a planned job, and an emergency.
dai1983 said:
A group of us bought a McDonald's late one night and were asked if we wanted to eat in or takeaway. We opted to eat in thank you very much. As soon as we started eating the guy moping the floor told us we had to leave as they were closing. My friend is but of a hot head and started arguing the fact that we had only just sat down after being given the option of doing so.
The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
Yes, your friend is a complete knob.The guy said we had to leave so they could close. So my mate opens his burger and splats it on the floor. By now there's a full argument going on as we drag pissed off mate out to the car. Lastly he turns around and launches his milk shake at the large side window and it goes everywhere much to the mopeds delight.
sebhaque said:
Jobsworths really make me chuckle. I was once told off (over the tannoys, no less) for having the tenacity to fill my tank AND A JERRY CAN at the same time. Apparently it was risky to fill both with fuel and they cut the pump off halfway through filling the jerry can. When I went in and had a piss and moan that I was filling legally approved vessels of fuel and I would either wait and block two out of the four pumps they had until they safely drained my car tank of the £20 of petrol I'd put in as I only wanted to fill the jerry can for my lawnmower, or they could just let me fill my jerry can and I'd leave, did the manager come out and say that this was a "special occasion" and he'd let me finish filling my jerry can (of £1.63) of fuel and let me pay for it. I thought I'd let them know what I thought of their £1.63 and left them a present of that amount of tyres on their forecourt. By the way they were waving their arms I assume they were really pleased with my performance.
When I lived in a shared house as an apprentice I went shopping with two housemates. We normally did the shopping in pairs (as there were 4 of us) but on this occasion one of the housemates was away and the other had recently broken his ankle playing rugby. He was on crutches and needed some painkillers. We decided that it'd be easier to get him home if we just lumped our shopping together and split it three ways. This was a great idea until we got to the checkouts. The injured chap went last, right before me, and I had a few crates of beer as my birthday was in the next week. Having scanned through nearly 180 items, the jobsworth woman decided she wouldn't let us buy 2 packets of paracetamol, 2 packets of nurofen and 6 crates of beer (on offer). Apparently it was a risk because we'd commit suicide or something. Even pointing out the ID she'd just checked had a birthday occurring 5 days later and that one of us was on crutches, she decided against it. We asked her to call a manager, which she did, and we ended up watching a good 5-minute argument between the two. The manager obviously realising we were students and just wanted our stuff, her reasoning being that we were young and didn't know what to do with the stuff we'd bought. After the five minutes, with the girl on the checkout opposite sitting down and watching the argument, we tipped our trolley all over the floor (a dick move, but we were 18), put our injured housemate inside it, and just wheeled him back to the car leaving the £250 worth of shopping on the checkout. We went back a month later when our housemate had regained the use of his ankle and never saw her working again.
So, two stories of you (and friends) behaving like spoiled brats. When I lived in a shared house as an apprentice I went shopping with two housemates. We normally did the shopping in pairs (as there were 4 of us) but on this occasion one of the housemates was away and the other had recently broken his ankle playing rugby. He was on crutches and needed some painkillers. We decided that it'd be easier to get him home if we just lumped our shopping together and split it three ways. This was a great idea until we got to the checkouts. The injured chap went last, right before me, and I had a few crates of beer as my birthday was in the next week. Having scanned through nearly 180 items, the jobsworth woman decided she wouldn't let us buy 2 packets of paracetamol, 2 packets of nurofen and 6 crates of beer (on offer). Apparently it was a risk because we'd commit suicide or something. Even pointing out the ID she'd just checked had a birthday occurring 5 days later and that one of us was on crutches, she decided against it. We asked her to call a manager, which she did, and we ended up watching a good 5-minute argument between the two. The manager obviously realising we were students and just wanted our stuff, her reasoning being that we were young and didn't know what to do with the stuff we'd bought. After the five minutes, with the girl on the checkout opposite sitting down and watching the argument, we tipped our trolley all over the floor (a dick move, but we were 18), put our injured housemate inside it, and just wheeled him back to the car leaving the £250 worth of shopping on the checkout. We went back a month later when our housemate had regained the use of his ankle and never saw her working again.
Perhaps it's time to grow up? Even if the above was a long time ago neither story is anything to be proud of.
Johnnytheboy said:
Has anyone encountered the thing in supermarkets where they won't sell you booze if you are accompanied by a minor?
Yes. When I took my nephew to the zoo (yeah, typical unimaginative uncle) and afterwards we stopped at Sainsbury's as I was going to theirs for dinner and I thought I would get some wine.He was only 3, clearly I wasn't trying to get him pissed.
At my local tip, Aylesbury, I was pouring old oil in to the relevant container when behind me, Bloke A is carrying across a little pink girl’s starter bike to the other disused bikes at the tip. He places it down, when Bloke B trots over and asks him if he can have it as his little girl needs a starter bike. Bloke A agrees this is a good idea and hands it over to Bloke B. job done – everybody happy - OH NO – no such luck…
A tip operative runs over and states that as the bike has been placed on the ground (for literally a few seconds) the bike now belongs to them (Eh? WTF?). If Bloke B wants the bike, he’ll have to hand over £20 for it. Bloke A and B are stood there gob smacked (as was I). This operative wasn’t budging and goes to grab the bike.
Quick as a flash Bloke A says he has changed his mind and takes the bike back to his car, and beckons Bloke B over. They drive out of the tip gates one behind the other, stop 20 yards away, and the bike is transferred over. The tip operative runs to the gate shouting at them for “breaking the law”, and takes their numbers down. All members of the public present were stunned…
Welcome to our wonderful world of recycling, and even better, reusing.
A tip operative runs over and states that as the bike has been placed on the ground (for literally a few seconds) the bike now belongs to them (Eh? WTF?). If Bloke B wants the bike, he’ll have to hand over £20 for it. Bloke A and B are stood there gob smacked (as was I). This operative wasn’t budging and goes to grab the bike.
Quick as a flash Bloke A says he has changed his mind and takes the bike back to his car, and beckons Bloke B over. They drive out of the tip gates one behind the other, stop 20 yards away, and the bike is transferred over. The tip operative runs to the gate shouting at them for “breaking the law”, and takes their numbers down. All members of the public present were stunned…
Welcome to our wonderful world of recycling, and even better, reusing.
Johnnytheboy said:
Has anyone encountered the thing in supermarkets where they won't sell you booze if you are accompanied by a minor?
It's ok - I have been IDd for buying non alcoholic beer and PG rated movies before now - I was in my late 30s at the time. 
(and before anyone says it - yes I know there is no point buying non alcoholic beer).
I was in Asda a few years back buying some pringles. I was at the self checkouts when the checkout asked for i.d the person responsible for the checkouts refused to let me buy them as I couldnt prove I was over 18. This ended with me quietly accepting this and not going back to asda.
bucksmanuk said:
At my local tip, Aylesbury, I was pouring old oil in to the relevant container when behind me, Bloke A is carrying across a little pink girl’s starter bike to the other disused bikes at the tip. He places it down, when Bloke B trots over and asks him if he can have it as his little girl needs a starter bike. Bloke A agrees this is a good idea and hands it over to Bloke B. job done – everybody happy - OH NO – no such luck…
A tip operative runs over and states that as the bike has been placed on the ground (for literally a few seconds) the bike now belongs to them (Eh? WTF?). If Bloke B wants the bike, he’ll have to hand over £20 for it. Bloke A and B are stood there gob smacked (as was I). This operative wasn’t budging and goes to grab the bike.
Quick as a flash Bloke A says he has changed his mind and takes the bike back to his car, and beckons Bloke B over. They drive out of the tip gates one behind the other, stop 20 yards away, and the bike is transferred over. The tip operative runs to the gate shouting at them for “breaking the law”, and takes their numbers down. All members of the public present were stunned…
Welcome to our wonderful world of recycling, and even better, reusing.
Hmmmmm - I'm struggling with the jobsworth tag here. This is theft...A tip operative runs over and states that as the bike has been placed on the ground (for literally a few seconds) the bike now belongs to them (Eh? WTF?). If Bloke B wants the bike, he’ll have to hand over £20 for it. Bloke A and B are stood there gob smacked (as was I). This operative wasn’t budging and goes to grab the bike.
Quick as a flash Bloke A says he has changed his mind and takes the bike back to his car, and beckons Bloke B over. They drive out of the tip gates one behind the other, stop 20 yards away, and the bike is transferred over. The tip operative runs to the gate shouting at them for “breaking the law”, and takes their numbers down. All members of the public present were stunned…
Welcome to our wonderful world of recycling, and even better, reusing.
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