how to get a 3 1/2 yr old to sleep?
Discussion
Monkeythree said:
Tire her out. Spend the evenings running round the garden or the park or whatever and then when she starts flagging, take her to the swing park and do some climbing and sliding. You might be tired out too but then everyone gets a good sleep.
One word. TRAMPOLINE.She jumps, you watch. She sleeps for 10 hours.
Fastdruid said:
Essentially our routine is:
8PM bed time. Alarm (on phone) goes off. Sometimes if they're in the middle of things and it's only a few minutes will let them stay a few minutes more but once it's been announced "bed time" that's it, no arguments, its upstairs to bed or reflection step.
Then get them changed, teeth, stories (two books or two chapters from long books), while little one has milk, older one (4yo) has last wee then to bed, set gro-clock[1] 60 seconds of cuddle then leave[2]. Youngest (2yo) finishes milk then cuddles and bed (in cot still).
8PM seems quite late to start the bed-time routine. Our 3yr granddaughter is staying with us overnight and she was in bed at 8, and at home it's more like 7.30.8PM bed time. Alarm (on phone) goes off. Sometimes if they're in the middle of things and it's only a few minutes will let them stay a few minutes more but once it's been announced "bed time" that's it, no arguments, its upstairs to bed or reflection step.
Then get them changed, teeth, stories (two books or two chapters from long books), while little one has milk, older one (4yo) has last wee then to bed, set gro-clock[1] 60 seconds of cuddle then leave[2]. Youngest (2yo) finishes milk then cuddles and bed (in cot still).
Fastdruid said:
[1] Hell *I* have to look at a clock to know if it's morning or the middle of the night, how is a 3yo meant to know it's not morning when it's bright and sunny outside?
Blackout blinds.Sheepshanks said:
Fastdruid said:
Essentially our routine is:
8PM bed time. Alarm (on phone) goes off. Sometimes if they're in the middle of things and it's only a few minutes will let them stay a few minutes more but once it's been announced "bed time" that's it, no arguments, its upstairs to bed or reflection step.
Then get them changed, teeth, stories (two books or two chapters from long books), while little one has milk, older one (4yo) has last wee then to bed, set gro-clock[1] 60 seconds of cuddle then leave[2]. Youngest (2yo) finishes milk then cuddles and bed (in cot still).
8PM seems quite late to start the bed-time routine. Our 3yr granddaughter is staying with us overnight and she was in bed at 8, and at home it's more like 7.30.8PM bed time. Alarm (on phone) goes off. Sometimes if they're in the middle of things and it's only a few minutes will let them stay a few minutes more but once it's been announced "bed time" that's it, no arguments, its upstairs to bed or reflection step.
Then get them changed, teeth, stories (two books or two chapters from long books), while little one has milk, older one (4yo) has last wee then to bed, set gro-clock[1] 60 seconds of cuddle then leave[2]. Youngest (2yo) finishes milk then cuddles and bed (in cot still).
Hell we don't even get in some days until 6:30, going to struggle to feed them, spend some time with them and get them to bed before 7:30!
Sheepshanks said:
Fastdruid said:
[1] Hell *I* have to look at a clock to know if it's morning or the middle of the night, how is a 3yo meant to know it's not morning when it's bright and sunny outside?
Blackout blinds.The point of the gro-clock isn't to stop them being woken by the sun, it's so if they wake in the night or early they know if it's morning or still night.
Our little boy knows that if his clock says it's morning and he comes in to our room he'll get a "good morning" and cuddles, if it says it's still night he'll get sent back to bed. The result of which is that he doesn't come in unless it's "morning", we don't get woken before ~7:20 and he gets a good nights sleep.
petemurphy said:
tonights the night we get tough. wish me luck. whimper.
Do it. I'm slightly disappointed you seem to be the one giving in, it was MOH who could detach himself from the crying better than me. Our son sleeps very well and yes, I echo the comments about friends babysitting as they find it easy. Bit like the 5&7 yr olds I used to babysit, 7.30 bed and not a peep until morning. Our boy has generally been very good, can't say we've done anything special but we have been firm on occasions when needed, he used to get a lot of ear infections so we would have to pander to him at times(felt terrible when we didn't twig though, telling him to lie down etc 
)
Anyway he's had a few times recently when he's been unsettled getting him to bed so we now read 2 stories, take him to brush his teeth, toilet etc then we read one more story. After this we lie down and we go through his day together, this calms him and he settles right down. Should take no longer than half an hour, been working well for a while now.
Routine and being firm when needed. If he does play up we usually let him get away with getting back up once or twice but not any more, unless it's for a very good reason.
)Anyway he's had a few times recently when he's been unsettled getting him to bed so we now read 2 stories, take him to brush his teeth, toilet etc then we read one more story. After this we lie down and we go through his day together, this calms him and he settles right down. Should take no longer than half an hour, been working well for a while now.
Routine and being firm when needed. If he does play up we usually let him get away with getting back up once or twice but not any more, unless it's for a very good reason.
Mum said I was golden, til Dad got home on shore leave.
I worked out he'd come & play when I cried, rather than Mum who would sort me out & put me down.
On their 5th disturbed night, I didn't get Dad coming to play, I got a cross Mum... Their sleep wasn't disturbed again for play
I don't have kids, but was good at babysitting - stay firm, it only takes a couple of times & you'll master it
I worked out he'd come & play when I cried, rather than Mum who would sort me out & put me down.
On their 5th disturbed night, I didn't get Dad coming to play, I got a cross Mum... Their sleep wasn't disturbed again for play
I don't have kids, but was good at babysitting - stay firm, it only takes a couple of times & you'll master it
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Monkeythree said:
Tire her out. Spend the evenings running round the garden or the park or whatever and then when she starts flagging, take her to the swing park and do some climbing and sliding. You might be tired out too but then everyone gets a good sleep.
One word. TRAMPOLINE.She jumps, you watch. She sleeps for 10 hours.
(Harder in winter but mrs dud a good job during the day and they start school this Sept)
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Monkeythree said:
Tire her out. Spend the evenings running round the garden or the park or whatever and then when she starts flagging, take her to the swing park and do some climbing and sliding. You might be tired out too but then everyone gets a good sleep.
One word. TRAMPOLINE.She jumps, you watch. She sleeps for 10 hours.
(Harder in winter but mrs dud a good job during the day and they start school this Sept)
Boundaries without consequences are not boundaries. We've just spent a week's holiday with a family with two boys, one ten the other twelve. The kids rule the roost. They do what they want, ignore instructions from the parents, moan, cry, sulk and are directly offensive to mum and dad. Frankly, they are out of control.
The parents are at their wits end. But, the problem is obvious to any objective observer. It is that in their desperate desire to be their childrens' mates, they are weak and ineffective. They threaten the kids with all types of sanctions when they play up but never, ever stick to them. So, the kids just carry on as normal. They know that eventually, the parents will cave in. And they do.
There were four families on this holiday. Nine adults, nine children & these two children were far and away the most badly behaved. It was obvious to everyone. It was also excruciatingly obvious to the parents.
What is much, much worse is that the children themselves have been harmed by this. They are really unhappy. The eldest one is verging on being disturbed. It is a very sad situation to behold.
I call such parenting abuse.
The parents are at their wits end. But, the problem is obvious to any objective observer. It is that in their desperate desire to be their childrens' mates, they are weak and ineffective. They threaten the kids with all types of sanctions when they play up but never, ever stick to them. So, the kids just carry on as normal. They know that eventually, the parents will cave in. And they do.
There were four families on this holiday. Nine adults, nine children & these two children were far and away the most badly behaved. It was obvious to everyone. It was also excruciatingly obvious to the parents.
What is much, much worse is that the children themselves have been harmed by this. They are really unhappy. The eldest one is verging on being disturbed. It is a very sad situation to behold.
I call such parenting abuse.
Blib said:
Boundaries without consequences are not boundaries. We've just spent a week's holiday with a family with two boys, one ten the other twelve. The kids rule the roost. They do what they want, ignore instructions from the parents, moan, cry, sulk and are directly offensive to mum and dad. Frankly, they are out of control.
The parents are at their wits end. But, the problem is obvious to any objective observer. It is that in their desperate desire to be their childrens' mates, they are weak and ineffective. They threaten the kids with all types of sanctions when they play up but never, ever stick to them. So, the kids just carry on as normal. They know that eventually, the parents will cave in. And they do.
There were four families on this holiday. Nine adults, nine children & these two children were far and away the most badly behaved. It was obvious to everyone. It was also excruciatingly obvious to the parents.
What is much, much worse is that the children themselves have been harmed by this. They are really unhappy. The eldest one is verging on being disturbed. It is a very sad situation to behold.
I call such parenting abuse.
unfortunately they dont come with instructions though. which i guess is why god invented pistonheads.The parents are at their wits end. But, the problem is obvious to any objective observer. It is that in their desperate desire to be their childrens' mates, they are weak and ineffective. They threaten the kids with all types of sanctions when they play up but never, ever stick to them. So, the kids just carry on as normal. They know that eventually, the parents will cave in. And they do.
There were four families on this holiday. Nine adults, nine children & these two children were far and away the most badly behaved. It was obvious to everyone. It was also excruciatingly obvious to the parents.
What is much, much worse is that the children themselves have been harmed by this. They are really unhappy. The eldest one is verging on being disturbed. It is a very sad situation to behold.
I call such parenting abuse.
Damn this topic for putting the knockers on my life!
After my smug posts earlier about my lovely kids being compliant and good sleepers, out of the blue my 3yr old boy has now started to wake up several times a night any time from 9.00pm-5.00am for no apparent reason. It's not too bad, but the usual routine of quick comforting, back into bed, rinse and repeat is back to settle him back to his usual sleeping pattern through from 7-7.
We're not quite sure where this is coming from, possibly some new teeth coming through, sickness of some sort or disturbance around the home or at his nursery (he's moving up a class soon, and that certainly affected his big sister when she did it so could be that).
I actually suspect he is reading PH and doing this to wind up his dad!
After my smug posts earlier about my lovely kids being compliant and good sleepers, out of the blue my 3yr old boy has now started to wake up several times a night any time from 9.00pm-5.00am for no apparent reason. It's not too bad, but the usual routine of quick comforting, back into bed, rinse and repeat is back to settle him back to his usual sleeping pattern through from 7-7.
We're not quite sure where this is coming from, possibly some new teeth coming through, sickness of some sort or disturbance around the home or at his nursery (he's moving up a class soon, and that certainly affected his big sister when she did it so could be that).
I actually suspect he is reading PH and doing this to wind up his dad!
prand said:
Damn this topic for putting the knockers on my life!
After my smug posts earlier about my lovely kids being compliant and good sleepers, out of the blue my 3yr old boy has now started to wake up several times a night any time from 9.00pm-5.00am for no apparent reason. It's not too bad, but the usual routine of quick comforting, back into bed, rinse and repeat is back to settle him back to his usual sleeping pattern through from 7-7.
We're not quite sure where this is coming from, possibly some new teeth coming through, sickness of some sort or disturbance around the home or at his nursery (he's moving up a class soon, and that certainly affected his big sister when she did it so could be that).
I actually suspect he is reading PH and doing this to wind up his dad!
glad he got my text After my smug posts earlier about my lovely kids being compliant and good sleepers, out of the blue my 3yr old boy has now started to wake up several times a night any time from 9.00pm-5.00am for no apparent reason. It's not too bad, but the usual routine of quick comforting, back into bed, rinse and repeat is back to settle him back to his usual sleeping pattern through from 7-7.
We're not quite sure where this is coming from, possibly some new teeth coming through, sickness of some sort or disturbance around the home or at his nursery (he's moving up a class soon, and that certainly affected his big sister when she did it so could be that).
I actually suspect he is reading PH and doing this to wind up his dad!
Ours, 5 & 6 are in bed lights off by 7:30pm since the early years, rigorous routine is the key but must be tough as soon as they get older. Shower/bath at 6:45 then reading time for half hour, calms them down which Alfie needs.
On holidays we are flexible and first couple of nights back are usually very tough. The negative of this is they rarely sleep in, get up between 6 and 7am.
Good luck!
On holidays we are flexible and first couple of nights back are usually very tough. The negative of this is they rarely sleep in, get up between 6 and 7am.
Good luck!
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