Match.com (Volume 6)

Match.com (Volume 6)

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Pebbles167

3,417 posts

151 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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That's certainly how I'd want to start something decent. When i came out of my first long term relationship i played various characters to hide the fact i wasn't really sure what i was doing. Sure enough none of the girls i met this way were on the scene long for one reason nor another.

Shnozz

27,422 posts

270 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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Pebbles167 said:
Keep at it. Besides, at least you have single friends to go out with and stuff. All mine are loved up, and so going out is a rarity to say the least.

Edited by Pebbles167 on Tuesday 8th December 16:08
Oh, don't get me wrong, it's not a woe is me post. I am happy as larry and out 5 - 6 nights a week and with a tinder/happn selection when I fancy a date. All is well with the world, simply posting in response to the chap who said he was getting starry eyed over what was the round peg for his round hole. Be careful when you start worrying if you've made a mistake, or how to be around her - that will be sniffed out a mile off and isn't supportive of being confident. And if there is one trait that's likely to turn off the ladies its a display of lack of confidence.

steelbreeze

136 posts

133 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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If you're right for each other you shouldn't have to play games. She should like you for your natural self. Be nice and treat her well, don't be too clingy or possessive, and you should be fine.

Pebbles167

3,417 posts

151 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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Shnozz said:
Oh, don't get me wrong, it's not a woe is me post. I am happy as larry and out 5 - 6 nights a week and with a tinder/happn selection when I fancy a date. All is well with the world, simply posting in response to the chap who said he was getting starry eyed over what was the round peg for his round hole. Be careful when you start worrying if you've made a mistake, or how to be around her - that will be sniffed out a mile off and isn't supportive of being confident. And if there is one trait that's likely to turn off the ladies its a display of lack of confidence.
That's cool man, was just thinking aloud if i was in the same boat.

I currently seem to revolve around dating Uni grads who don't want to start anything, or single mums who treat me as their new boyfriend before things have even really started. Basically it ends up with me (or them) walking away and leaves me feeling either a bit inadequate towards the former, or like a bit of an arse towards the latter. The times i have confidence issues generally means I've been dwelling on one of these outcomes possibly being inevitable. Seems like the same old road.

I don't really mind though, I've got thick skin and I'm an optimist. Plus I occasionally get an invite back to their place, so i still feel alive!

Cheers for the advice smile


SkinnyPete

1,411 posts

148 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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Shnozz said:
SkinnyPete said:
2nd date went perfect well although we joke that it feels like the 4th or 5th because we spend hours on the phone every other night (up to 4 hours at one point).

I don't want to broadcast too many details for obvious reasons but I really like this girl, so much so that I occasionally get a bit anxious thinking about her in case I've said something wrong or in case she realises I'm not her type. It wouldn't be so much a problem but in 27 years I've always felt like I'm pushing squares into circles, until now.
Sadly I liked her and when that happens the ar5ehole in me subsides and the time-old tradition applies whereby behaving without nonchalance and confidence soon brings about a disinterest. Start displaying your anxiety or need to treat her right and you're on a slippery slope.
If I'm honest from our last correspondence I got the feeling I may be taking a ride on this slope soon (or I could be paranoid).

My cocky, arrogant, bold, brazen persona fades the more I like a girl, and when its replaced with vulnerability (not to be confused with weakness) and genuine lust you can literally see girls become less interested.

E.g. At first I teased her about how I'm seeing other women from Tinder, but now recently I've told her this is no longer the case. Bad move maybe.

SpeckledJim said:
SkinnyPete said:
2nd date went perfect well although we joke that it feels like the 4th or 5th because we spend hours on the phone every other night (up to 4 hours at one point).
That's surely not a good idea is it? 4 hours on the phone is what she does with her best mate from primary school. Not Mr Right.

"Honestly mum, I think he's the one. He's SUCH a chatterbox!"

Doesn't ring true, does it. Keep your best craic for when you're together.
You know normally I would agree with you, I try and keep calls and texts to a minimum but we just seem to have such fun, interesting and sexual conversations that they go on for hours. Why fight it?




Edited by SkinnyPete on Tuesday 8th December 18:53

Pebbles167

3,417 posts

151 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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If the conversations are sexual, i doubt you've got too much to worry about. That being said, if things seem to be taking the turn that means you're blurting random and possibly weird stuff out, then try giving yourself a 15 minute window in which to end the conversation for the evening. After that crack on with something else, pick it up again another day.

Pebbles167

3,417 posts

151 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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Your mind is dangerous

Gretchen

18,998 posts

215 months

Tuesday 8th December 2015
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Strangely enough I've got some guy called Pete who seems to have fallen for me in a big way and won't stop messaging me...

On the other hand the one who 'plays hard to get' I'm besotted by.


Oh what a wonderful life.


(Another excellent weekend with a young man has passed by. I can't see myself making it til the end of the year)



SkinnyPete

1,411 posts

148 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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Another awesome date and amazing night with this lovely lady.

This is a bit embarrassing but one thing that is getting in the way is we are two totally different kisses. I know it takes two to tango but I've never had any problem kissing anyone else, its frustrating for the both of us though.

I feel like I'm in high school. How strange.

Pebbles167

3,417 posts

151 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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Haha! Is she like eating your face, or you hers? In honesty I'm sure it'll sort itself out.

PAUL500

2,627 posts

245 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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Dropped back into the dating pool a week or so ago having managed to escape for a while by meeting a lovely, kind girl who ticked all the boxes, my god I was bored by the end of the first month and called time on it a few weeks later.....

Why is it that the fkwits get under your skin and the good ones become irritating with their niceness.

Anyway gave tinder another go, my god thats changed, the munters have discovered it in droves and scared off all the pretty ones.

Had a month left on my previous match subscription so unsuspended it, same old faces as usual!

So it was off to pof, bloody hell even the ugly ones dont message you on that place anymore :-)

Single for xmas, kind of nice really.

I recall December was a crap dating period last year as well, anyone else have better results out there?

Edited by PAUL500 on Friday 11th December 19:52

Pebbles167

3,417 posts

151 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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Nice girls are too boring, tinder girls are 'munters', match girls are old news and pof girls are ugly?

Your standards would appear to be too high.

anonymous-user

53 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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[quote=PAUL500]

So it was off to pof, bloody hell even the ugly ones dont message you on that place anymore :-)

quote]

I'm not having much luck on POF, I think it is better to use a payed one. I have used zoosk which is slightly better, but still not much luck.

it does seem like there are a lot of 'career' daters on the sites, like a hobby.




PAUL500

2,627 posts

245 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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Pebbles167 said:
Nice girls are too boring, tinder girls are 'munters', match girls are old news and pof girls are ugly?

Your standards would appear to be too high.
No one should ever lower their expectations in life, accept them as being an obstacle maybe, but never just "make do" what is the point in that.

PAUL500

2,627 posts

245 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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The Spruce goose]AUL500 said:
So it was off to pof, bloody hell even the ugly ones dont message you on that place anymore :-)

quote]

I'm not having much luck on POF, I think it is better to use a payed one. I have used zoosk which is slightly better, but still not much luck.

it does seem like there are a lot of 'career' daters on the sites, like a hobby.
I think its the time of year, the paid sites are no better, everywhere seems to be just full of window shoppers who run a mile at the merest hint of making it real.

227bhp

10,203 posts

127 months

Friday 11th December 2015
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PAUL500 said:
The Spruce goose]AUL500 said:
So it was off to pof, bloody hell even the ugly ones dont message you on that place anymore :-)

quote]

I'm not having much luck on POF, I think it is better to use a payed one. I have used zoosk which is slightly better, but still not much luck.
wink
it does seem like there are a lot of 'career' daters on the sites, like a hobby.
I think its the time of year, the paid sites are no better, everywhere seems to be just full of window shoppers who run a mile at the merest hint of making it real.
You're just making excuses for your inadequacies, pulling at this time of year is easy:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2445812/Co...

wink

In Summer women have plenty of choice, get out, parties etc, in Winter they need to settle down for a bit, it's called 'Cuffing'. smokin

martin mrt

3,768 posts

200 months

Saturday 12th December 2015
quotequote all
PAUL500 said:
Dropped back into the dating pool a week or so ago having managed to escape for a while by meeting a lovely, kind girl who ticked all the boxes, my god I was bored by the end of the first month and called time on it a few weeks later.....

Why is it that the fkwits get under your skin and the good ones become irritating with their niceness.

Anyway gave tinder another go, my god thats changed, the munters have discovered it in droves and scared off all the pretty ones.

Had a month left on my previous match subscription so unsuspended it, same old faces as usual!

So it was off to pof, bloody hell even the ugly ones dont message you on that place anymore :-)

Single for xmas, kind of nice really.

I recall December was a crap dating period last year as well, anyone else have better results out there?

Edited by PAUL500 on Friday 11th December 19:52
You sound like your having the same luck as me.

After calling it a day with a girl I've been on/off with for over a year I'm finding the above to be completely 100% accurate.

I met a girl in Summer time, through a friend, we seen each other for 2-3 months, and it was fantastic. However I decided I was going to end up hurt and ended it, looking back I still question why. We are still in touch, banter with her is good but I think I've been friend zoned

Match, POF ain't up to much either

Single for Xmas. Same as last year and the year before

SkinnyPete

1,411 posts

148 months

Saturday 12th December 2015
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Pebbles167 said:
Haha! Is she like eating your face, or you hers? In honesty I'm sure it'll sort itself out.
At first I thought it was me but now I think its her, she just gets the tongue in straight away, there is no warm up or tension building with her biglaugh

The other day I left the room for a moment after having made us lunch, and when I came back in she was doing the dishes. I told her shes a keeper hehe

Went out again with her last night, she wanted to treat me this time so she drove and was going to pay for the meal but mine was quite expensive and I felt bad so I ended up paying hehe

PAUL500

2,627 posts

245 months

Saturday 12th December 2015
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227bhp said:
You're just making excuses for your inadequacies, pulling at this time of year is easy:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2445812/Co...

wink

In Summer women have plenty of choice, get out, parties etc, in Winter they need to settle down for a bit, it's called 'Cuffing'. smokin
If its in the Daily Mail then it must be true! :-)

Started doubting my current pics, the contents of my profile etc then had an out of the blue "hello" from a nice looking teacher on pof today, she complimented my pics, said she liked how I had put together my profile etc so that's not scaring them off. Whether I hear back from her again is another matter!

So what the bloody hell are the hundreds and hundred of single girls on all these sites actually looking for these days? the usual suspects are on there every time I log in, but don't even look at my profile when I send a message never mind bother to reply.

They must get bored just window shopping and ego boosting for months on end, I guess the sites attract a certain type these days now they have become quite mainstream and its just a concentration of a certain group and the genuine ones give up quite quickly.

PAUL500

2,627 posts

245 months

Saturday 12th December 2015
quotequote all
I dont actually mind being single over xmas, its the endless timewasting/messaging that is involved with net dating that gets to me at times, at least I can do it in the comfort of home and when it suits, the thought of going back to the pubbing and clubbing regime sends a chill through me.

If someone could format a more successful method online they but become gazzilionaires very quickly, the markets certainly out there.


martin mrt said:
You sound like your having the same luck as me.

After calling it a day with a girl I've been on/off with for over a year I'm finding the above to be completely 100% accurate.

I met a girl in Summer time, through a friend, we seen each other for 2-3 months, and it was fantastic. However I decided I was going to end up hurt and ended it, looking back I still question why. We are still in touch, banter with her is good but I think I've been friend zoned

Match, POF ain't up to much either

Single for Xmas. Same as last year and the year before
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