Match.com (Volume 6)
Discussion
cheddar said:
I'd love to tell you that she's my dream woman but the following morning I'm making breakfast when she walked into the kitchen and just stood there looking straight at me, I said hi, she whispered back 'I love you'
I'd only known her for 27 hours by then, I told her I felt a little uncomfortable (in more ways than one!) and that the 'I love you' thing was maybe a bit soon, she became embarrassed and flustered, packed her bags and left.
She's text a few times since asking to come back but, for some reason, I'm finding it quite easy to resist
Perhaps I'm being a bit shallow minded but the last person that said those three words to me far too soon turned out to be a raving lunatic that completely fried my brain I'd only known her for 27 hours by then, I told her I felt a little uncomfortable (in more ways than one!) and that the 'I love you' thing was maybe a bit soon, she became embarrassed and flustered, packed her bags and left.
She's text a few times since asking to come back but, for some reason, I'm finding it quite easy to resist
Bang her again but be careful. She sounds completely bonkers.
From my own experience.
When I first blundered into the whole new world of net dating I thought I had found Nirvana at last!
Pages of willing, occasionally attractive single women all in one place, perfect.
Like everyone else I had forgotten the adage, Men are from Mars etc.
You think its like an Argos catalogue, hmm I like that one, ooooo that one's even better, hang on ding dong, she is the woman of my dreams. Press of a button and they are yours. All so simple.
The reality is its not a cross section of single people, its a concentration of a certain minority all hanging out in the same location, typically unicorn hunters seeking mr perfect, bodyclock ticking big time so think if he does not exist in the real world he must be on a web site! You may tick 99 of the 100 boxes but the next day after a date they think mr 100 pointer is just around the corner and ignore you after that, 6 months later they are still hunting. Then there are the damaged goods, fresh out of a disaster relationship, or the mad as a box of frogs one who has had a new bloke every 6 weeks since they were 18, and then there are the penpals, either bored single mothers or housewives in a dead relationship needing an ego boost, they play the game big time online until you suggest a meet up then they all go Harry Houdini on you as they cannot back up the chat.
Trying to find a normal person who just wants to date is the proverbial needle in the haystack.
Its a way to get from point A to point B when you are newly single, I had some fun adventures that would otherwise never have happened but in the main net dating does not work.
Success with net dating is a bit like betting people, you hear of the occasional one big win, but rarely hear about the thousands of losers in the same time period.
Do not confuse how people would treat you face to face in the real world with how you will get treated online.
Its the classic numbers game, men do all the chasing, women are in the minority, get bombarded and then think they have suddenly turned from an average 5 out of 10 into a 9 out of 10 major catch and get very fussy, so they fall for the patter of the player every time then get disillusioned and walk away from it.
Fill your boots, make the most of it, key thing is don't take the knock backs to heart, the vast majority of blokes on those places are going through exactly the same as you.
When I first blundered into the whole new world of net dating I thought I had found Nirvana at last!
Pages of willing, occasionally attractive single women all in one place, perfect.
Like everyone else I had forgotten the adage, Men are from Mars etc.
You think its like an Argos catalogue, hmm I like that one, ooooo that one's even better, hang on ding dong, she is the woman of my dreams. Press of a button and they are yours. All so simple.
The reality is its not a cross section of single people, its a concentration of a certain minority all hanging out in the same location, typically unicorn hunters seeking mr perfect, bodyclock ticking big time so think if he does not exist in the real world he must be on a web site! You may tick 99 of the 100 boxes but the next day after a date they think mr 100 pointer is just around the corner and ignore you after that, 6 months later they are still hunting. Then there are the damaged goods, fresh out of a disaster relationship, or the mad as a box of frogs one who has had a new bloke every 6 weeks since they were 18, and then there are the penpals, either bored single mothers or housewives in a dead relationship needing an ego boost, they play the game big time online until you suggest a meet up then they all go Harry Houdini on you as they cannot back up the chat.
Trying to find a normal person who just wants to date is the proverbial needle in the haystack.
Its a way to get from point A to point B when you are newly single, I had some fun adventures that would otherwise never have happened but in the main net dating does not work.
Success with net dating is a bit like betting people, you hear of the occasional one big win, but rarely hear about the thousands of losers in the same time period.
Do not confuse how people would treat you face to face in the real world with how you will get treated online.
Its the classic numbers game, men do all the chasing, women are in the minority, get bombarded and then think they have suddenly turned from an average 5 out of 10 into a 9 out of 10 major catch and get very fussy, so they fall for the patter of the player every time then get disillusioned and walk away from it.
Fill your boots, make the most of it, key thing is don't take the knock backs to heart, the vast majority of blokes on those places are going through exactly the same as you.
davhill said:
Here's an invitation to start a gold plated, 5 star, mink-lined PH shredding.
Having emerged as one of the post-divorce walking wounded, I'm looking around on match.com and piece of fish. I'm booked in to have my head examined shortly.
I've had about 500 views on match and faved a few. However, there's a choice blonde on pof - I faved her too.
She's ten years younger than me, a little 'dipsy' and a footie fan - I know seven times the square root of f
k all about football.
I've quick messaged her three times, just short info messages. Result = foxtrot so far.
You worldly bods probably know and I'm wondering what's the scheme/stratagem? I've no wish to sell my soul to pof/match and she 'hasn't got 'meet me' and asks specifically for quick messages.
Shred away then, chaps. Just a warning though. I've thought of coke and Hookers, psychotherapy and castration.
Having emerged as one of the post-divorce walking wounded, I'm looking around on match.com and piece of fish. I'm booked in to have my head examined shortly.
I've had about 500 views on match and faved a few. However, there's a choice blonde on pof - I faved her too.
She's ten years younger than me, a little 'dipsy' and a footie fan - I know seven times the square root of f
k all about football.I've quick messaged her three times, just short info messages. Result = foxtrot so far.
You worldly bods probably know and I'm wondering what's the scheme/stratagem? I've no wish to sell my soul to pof/match and she 'hasn't got 'meet me' and asks specifically for quick messages.
Shred away then, chaps. Just a warning though. I've thought of coke and Hookers, psychotherapy and castration.
Edited by PAUL500 on Wednesday 18th January 21:04
cheddar said:
I'd love to tell you that she's my dream woman but the following morning I'm making breakfast when she walked into the kitchen and just stood there looking straight at me, I said hi, she whispered back 'I love you'
I'd only known her for 27 hours by then, I told her I felt a little uncomfortable (in more ways than one!) and that the 'I love you' thing was maybe a bit soon, she became embarrassed and flustered, packed her bags and left.
She's text a few times since asking to come back but, for some reason, I'm finding it quite easy to resist
I was dating someone and I realised how much I loved her within a few weeks (I was drunk at the time) ... 10 months later we're still together and we love each other, so it can happen quickly.I'd only known her for 27 hours by then, I told her I felt a little uncomfortable (in more ways than one!) and that the 'I love you' thing was maybe a bit soon, she became embarrassed and flustered, packed her bags and left.
She's text a few times since asking to come back but, for some reason, I'm finding it quite easy to resist
That said - Perhaps you should make it clear either way where you're going with this - to her specifically. If you want nothing, be clear and cut all ties properly - If you think it has legs, then tell her that you care, but to give it time.
Failing all that, she's bat s
t crazy and you should do something about your home security....ETA: My online dating was an unmitigated disaster and my current partner was a former colleague.
Edited by james_tigerwoods on Wednesday 18th January 21:05
All that jazz said:
Umm, why? 
Are you mad or did all this only happen in your head?
She's mad, yes mad in the bedroom, but mad in general too, needy and smothering Are you mad or did all this only happen in your head?I think it's fair to say that there's a bit more to a quality relationship than a dildo up the oxo
Do you want her number?
james_tigerwoods said:
Failing all that, she's bat st crazy and you should do something about your home security....
Thist crazy and you should do something about your home security....Her last texts were asking for golf coaching, I politely declined, then she asked me if she should delete my number, I said it might be best
Glad I live 40 miles away from her
cheddar said:
james_tigerwoods said:
Failing all that, she's bat st crazy and you should do something about your home security....
Thist crazy and you should do something about your home security....Her last texts were asking for golf coaching, I politely declined, then she asked me if she should delete my number, I said it might be best
Glad I live 40 miles away from her
PAUL500 said:
From my own experience.
When I first blundered into the whole new world of net dating I thought I had found Nirvana at last!
Pages of willing, occasionally attractive single women all in one place, perfect.
Like everyone else I had forgotten the adage, Men are from Mars etc.
You think its like an Argos catalogue, hmm I like that one, ooooo that one's even better, hang on ding dong, she is the woman of my dreams. Press of a button and they are yours. All so simple.
The reality is its not a cross section of single people, its a concentration of a certain minority all hanging out in the same location, typically unicorn hunters seeking mr perfect, bodyclock ticking big time so think if he does not exist in the real world he must be on a web site! You may tick 99 of the 100 boxes but the next day after a date they think mr 100 pointer is just around the corner and ignore you after that, 6 months later they are still hunting. Then there are the damaged goods, fresh out of a disaster relationship, or the mad as a box of frogs one who has had a new bloke every 6 weeks since they were 18, and then there are the penpals, either bored single mothers or housewives in a dead relationship needing an ego boost, they play the game big time online until you suggest a meet up then they all go Harry Houdini on you as they cannot back up the chat.
Trying to find a normal person who just wants to date is the proverbial needle in the haystack.
Its a way to get from point A to point B when you are newly single, I had some fun adventures that would otherwise never have happened but in the main net dating does not work.
Success with net dating is a bit like betting people, you hear of the occasional one big win, but rarely hear about the thousands of losers in the same time period.
Do not confuse how people would treat you face to face in the real world with how you will get treated online.
Its the classic numbers game, men do all the chasing, women are in the minority, get bombarded and then think they have suddenly turned from an average 5 out of 10 into a 9 out of 10 major catch and get very fussy, so they fall for the patter of the player every time then get disillusioned and walk away from it.
Fill your boots, make the most of it, key thing is don't take the knock backs to heart, the vast majority of blokes on those places are going through exactly the same as you.
A very accurate and well written summary Paul! When I first blundered into the whole new world of net dating I thought I had found Nirvana at last!
Pages of willing, occasionally attractive single women all in one place, perfect.
Like everyone else I had forgotten the adage, Men are from Mars etc.
You think its like an Argos catalogue, hmm I like that one, ooooo that one's even better, hang on ding dong, she is the woman of my dreams. Press of a button and they are yours. All so simple.
The reality is its not a cross section of single people, its a concentration of a certain minority all hanging out in the same location, typically unicorn hunters seeking mr perfect, bodyclock ticking big time so think if he does not exist in the real world he must be on a web site! You may tick 99 of the 100 boxes but the next day after a date they think mr 100 pointer is just around the corner and ignore you after that, 6 months later they are still hunting. Then there are the damaged goods, fresh out of a disaster relationship, or the mad as a box of frogs one who has had a new bloke every 6 weeks since they were 18, and then there are the penpals, either bored single mothers or housewives in a dead relationship needing an ego boost, they play the game big time online until you suggest a meet up then they all go Harry Houdini on you as they cannot back up the chat.
Trying to find a normal person who just wants to date is the proverbial needle in the haystack.
Its a way to get from point A to point B when you are newly single, I had some fun adventures that would otherwise never have happened but in the main net dating does not work.
Success with net dating is a bit like betting people, you hear of the occasional one big win, but rarely hear about the thousands of losers in the same time period.
Do not confuse how people would treat you face to face in the real world with how you will get treated online.
Its the classic numbers game, men do all the chasing, women are in the minority, get bombarded and then think they have suddenly turned from an average 5 out of 10 into a 9 out of 10 major catch and get very fussy, so they fall for the patter of the player every time then get disillusioned and walk away from it.
Fill your boots, make the most of it, key thing is don't take the knock backs to heart, the vast majority of blokes on those places are going through exactly the same as you.
Yeh right, so you keep telling everyone. Don't happen to work for match do you?
No doubt the ball always falls on red in roulette whenever you bet on it, and you always get a 21 in blackjack as well.
Not my experience at all. In my short time of using the site I was pretty successful and didn't get any knock backs.
No doubt the ball always falls on red in roulette whenever you bet on it, and you always get a 21 in blackjack as well.
CaptainSlow said:
All that jazz said:
PAUL500 said:
From my own experience.
..
A very accurate and well written summary Paul! ..
PAUL500 said:
Yeh right, so you keep telling everyone. Don't happen to work for match do you?
No doubt the ball always falls on red in roulette whenever you bet on it, and you always get a 21 in blackjack as well.
Not my experience at all. In my short time of using the site I was pretty successful and didn't get any knock backs.
I keep telling everyone?No doubt the ball always falls on red in roulette whenever you bet on it, and you always get a 21 in blackjack as well.
CaptainSlow said:
All that jazz said:
PAUL500 said:
From my own experience.
..
A very accurate and well written summary Paul! ..
I haven't actually broken cover about my being on the site prior to the post this evening. Can you please elaborate what you mean?
My error, confused you with another member who pops up whenever anyone tells the truth about net dating proclaiming its the place where dreams are made! :-)
To have had such success you must have some bloody good photos to get even a reply or very low standards!
Are you presently with a girl you met on match?
To have had such success you must have some bloody good photos to get even a reply or very low standards!
Are you presently with a girl you met on match?
Edited by PAUL500 on Wednesday 18th January 23:07
I've been doing online dating for about ten months now, and I still see the same people on the sites. Some I even recognise/ met up with last time I was single four years ago. Maybe they think I'm a unicorn hunter too?
The chance of meeting anyone at all would be decent, let alone a unicorn!
The chance of meeting anyone at all would be decent, let alone a unicorn!
PAUL500 said:
My error, confused you with another member who pops up whenever anyone tells the truth about net dating proclaiming its the place where dreams are made! :-)
To have had such success you must have some bloody good photos to get even a reply or very low standards!
Are you presently with a girl you met on match?
OK fair enough.To have had such success you must have some bloody good photos to get even a reply or very low standards!
Are you presently with a girl you met on match?
Edited by PAUL500 on Wednesday 18th January 23:07
At first I didn't put a photo on my profile, just a honest description and a well written but witty message seemed to do the trick. I'm above average on the looks department so they didn't seem to be disappointed when a photo was shared. Admittedly, I didn't go for cute blondes 10 years my junior.
CaptainSlow said:
All that jazz said:
CaptainSlow said:
All that jazz said:
Also iirc that 'favourite' button thing doesn't show you who it is unless you pay - you just get a bunch of notifications that "someone" likes you.
Unless it's changed recently that's incorrect.The work around is to search the site via google (e.g. "site
of.com [username]" ) but that doesn't always work.feef said:
regarding POF, you get a notification that a user likes you and you can see their username, but they have removed the username search from the site so you can't just search for them. Clicking through the 'who likes me' requires payment.
The work around is to search the site via google (e.g. "siteof.com [username]" ) but that doesn't always work.
Or on the mobile app do the 'meet me game' and they'll often be the first person that comes up- their picture will match teh notification one if it is.The work around is to search the site via google (e.g. "site
of.com [username]" ) but that doesn't always work.I've been chatting to a girl i met on POF, really pretty and a fair bit in common.
Had a decent and fun chat on the first date, and again with a few beers on the second. No sex or anything, but went for a walk after the pub she had me pushed up against the wall, making out with me and all that. So i guess she likes me somewhat.
I'm meeting her again tonight, was thinking of taking her to dinner but i have to leave at 19:30 to go to work, which is annoying.
Guess the third date fun might have to wait until the fourth date, if that happens. Either way, I'm really hoping my antisocial work hours dont ruin this one, i actually like her.
Had a decent and fun chat on the first date, and again with a few beers on the second. No sex or anything, but went for a walk after the pub she had me pushed up against the wall, making out with me and all that. So i guess she likes me somewhat.
I'm meeting her again tonight, was thinking of taking her to dinner but i have to leave at 19:30 to go to work, which is annoying.
Guess the third date fun might have to wait until the fourth date, if that happens. Either way, I'm really hoping my antisocial work hours dont ruin this one, i actually like her.
mcdjl said:
feef said:
regarding POF, you get a notification that a user likes you and you can see their username, but they have removed the username search from the site so you can't just search for them. Clicking through the 'who likes me' requires payment.
The work around is to search the site via google (e.g. "siteof.com [username]" ) but that doesn't always work.
Or on the mobile app do the 'meet me game' and they'll often be the first person that comes up- their picture will match teh notification one if it is.The work around is to search the site via google (e.g. "site
of.com [username]" ) but that doesn't always work.Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff