Thinking of leaving the OH
Discussion
OP - I apologise for my rapid inappropriate response and slow thought process.
In retrospect OP you are obviously a good enough to care in the first place. I know some people who have left good wives with multiple kids.
However I do still and will always believe you are wrong for breaking up. In my younger days (before I was married) I had an affair with my teachers wife. I was single at the time. I can honestly say when she was talking about living and moving in together I was thinking no way. When the crunch came I walked away.
Hope this helps.
In retrospect OP you are obviously a good enough to care in the first place. I know some people who have left good wives with multiple kids.
However I do still and will always believe you are wrong for breaking up. In my younger days (before I was married) I had an affair with my teachers wife. I was single at the time. I can honestly say when she was talking about living and moving in together I was thinking no way. When the crunch came I walked away.
Hope this helps.
OP, I've not read the whole thread, so sorry if it's been covered. However, your plan of living close, still doing the school run and bed routine, forget it.
However nice your fiancée is, the moment you leave, you've left. You can't just swan back in to read a bedtime story. She'll let you see the kid once, maybe twice a week.
Love is hard, having kids is hard, it's easy to walk away when the grass looks greener.
However nice your fiancée is, the moment you leave, you've left. You can't just swan back in to read a bedtime story. She'll let you see the kid once, maybe twice a week.
Love is hard, having kids is hard, it's easy to walk away when the grass looks greener.
Andyjc86 said:
However nice your fiancée is, the moment you leave, you've left. You can't just swan back in to read a bedtime story. She'll let you see the kid once, maybe twice a week.
Especially when his ex is shagging a new fella.OP - I hope you like McDonalds and cinemas on a Sunday afternoon....
Read most of the replies and generally agree.
If you didn't have the nipper i'd have perhaps suggested do what makes you happy, alas, you do so don't be selfish.
You need to make a huge effort with your O/H before you even think about anything like this. She has born you a child to continue "your legacy", stood by you through you illness and probably had a good few offers of affairs in her time but looks to have said no.
Put the shoe on the other foot, if she left you without so much as trying for another man. What would you do? How would that make you feel?
I would be inclined to say, if you don't want to be with your O/H then do not leave her for another woman as that relationship will always be based on unfaithfulness. As basically that's what this boils down to as you've already done the groundwork with that. You would never get the idea that this other woman could be doing the same to you with someone else when she gets bored.
Think long and hard about this OP, my parents split when I was a young lad. I no longer speak to my old man due to him in part being a selfish prick and doing something similar. I see him now and again at birthdays for my nephew and such, but otherwise, I have no time for him.
Keep the family home a family home, not a broken one.
Take your O/H on dates, do the things you did when you first met. If you can remember, take her to the first place you took her out to.
Do things off your own back for her, like she does on daily basis for you.
If you didn't have the nipper i'd have perhaps suggested do what makes you happy, alas, you do so don't be selfish.
You need to make a huge effort with your O/H before you even think about anything like this. She has born you a child to continue "your legacy", stood by you through you illness and probably had a good few offers of affairs in her time but looks to have said no.
Put the shoe on the other foot, if she left you without so much as trying for another man. What would you do? How would that make you feel?
I would be inclined to say, if you don't want to be with your O/H then do not leave her for another woman as that relationship will always be based on unfaithfulness. As basically that's what this boils down to as you've already done the groundwork with that. You would never get the idea that this other woman could be doing the same to you with someone else when she gets bored.
Think long and hard about this OP, my parents split when I was a young lad. I no longer speak to my old man due to him in part being a selfish prick and doing something similar. I see him now and again at birthdays for my nephew and such, but otherwise, I have no time for him.
Keep the family home a family home, not a broken one.
Take your O/H on dates, do the things you did when you first met. If you can remember, take her to the first place you took her out to.
Do things off your own back for her, like she does on daily basis for you.
DoTheRightThing said:
Anyway, I'm in a horrible situation.
First things first, you're not....your fiancé is.DoTheRightThing said:
I have a 18month year old daughter whom I love dearly and is the centre of my world. I have a beautiful, caring, patient and sensitive fiancé who loves me unconditionally and I know will stand by me until the end of our times. I have a large joint mortgage and a life with this women that is interwoven and has been built together.
You really really don't know how lucky you are mate.DoTheRightThing said:
But I am no longer IN love with this women, I don't think I am anyway. I feel myself tense when she shows physical affection and have found myself even turning my cheek when she attempts to kiss me. I can take or leave sex with her. We have talked, and she has convinced herself it's just some sort of phase and wants to push on with more kids, marriage etc etc - I am not so sure this is wise. I feel incredible protective of her and wish to look after her but that spark of excitement and desire appears to be absent.
Her body and emotional state have been through the mill over the last couple of years being pregnant and then trying to bring up a newborn whilst finding out that you aren't happy... and she's still showing you affection and trying to understand how you feel??? Jesus Christ, at risk of repeating myself... you don't know how f
king lucky you are.DoTheRightThing said:
To complicate matters a women from my past has recently featured in my life more and the level of passion and emotion we share is hard to put into words. Intellectually she challenges me and stretches me and I think I find this incredibly refreshing and nourishing. She has signalled her desire to take things further, even moving to be with me and giving up a top salary in London to do so..
Has it not registered that if your fiancé had more to think about than washing, ironing, stty nappies, prams, feed times,no sleep and a bloke she's st scared might be leaving her, she might have a bit of time to intellectually challenge you???Of course you find this other bird refreshing and challenging, it's escapism. Lets see whether she regrets giving up her "top" salary in London when you're not with her because of your daughters birthday, illness first day at school or simply because your daughter is missing you and wants some Daddy time because you aren't there? And while your being influenced by another piece of skirt you've got no chance of sorting it with the mother of your child at home. Cut off all ties, periodDoTheRightThing said:
I feel sick. I feel like if I stay where I am currently I will always wonder what could have been and possibly grow to resent my fiancé. Or simply live a kind of half existence where I have outwardly nothing at all to complain about but inwardly am looking for something quite different.
I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
That's exactly what you'll be doing, but not for long. Because if your fiancé is as fantastic as you claim her to be, she'll be happily sorted in a new relationship, hopefully with a bloke who doesn't look at her in pity or who views her as intellectually inferior. Oh and for good measure your daughter will be calling the new man daddy ( or if you're lucky Daddy2)and will be telling you in no time how he makes her laugh,and what a silly funny man he his...sounds great doesn't it?I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
DoTheRightThing said:
She is an amazing mother, cooks, cleans, ensures I have ironed shirts come Monday and host of other clichéd home-making abilities that our society appears to hold dear.
Along with loyalty and understanding, as she seems to have them as well...Have I mentioned that you don't know how lucky you are?DoTheRightThing said:
My mother adores her, my brothers and their wife's adore her. She cares for the very sick and asks for little in return. So the mere mention of my unhappiness is met with consternation and disbelief. If I were to leave my fiancé I would be a pariah, my family would look on in disgust, her family who have been nothing but kind to me would be appalled. Society would no doubt judge me harshly and I would be racked with guilt. It would destroy her. I was brought up to value relationships. My mother and father stayed together until my fathers untimely death and I feel their influence strongly in this matter.
Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
And know what? You come across as a genuinely decent bloke, going through a real change of circumstances in your life. You've probably given up a few things trying to be a good partner, but still have mates doing their blokey stuff. You've realised the enormity of parenthood, with a (no doubt) tired partner and how that's going to be your life for the foreseeable future, not skirt chasing or grabbing the extra hours in the pub with your mates etc. Your not alone in thinking stuff like that,in fact it's understandable in many ways,but it's something you need to snap out of, and bloody quick.Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
Did I say how lucky you are?
Edited by sjc on Wednesday 1st October 11:59
sjc said:
DoTheRightThing said:
Anyway, I'm in a horrible situation.
First things first, you're not....your fiancé is.DoTheRightThing said:
I have a 18month year old daughter whom I love dearly and is the centre of my world. I have a beautiful, caring, patient and sensitive fiancé who loves me unconditionally and I know will stand by me until the end of our times. I have a large joint mortgage and a life with this women that is interwoven and has been built together.
You really really don't know how lucky you are mate.DoTheRightThing said:
But I am no longer IN love with this women, I don't think I am anyway. I feel myself tense when she shows physical affection and have found myself even turning my cheek when she attempts to kiss me. I can take or leave sex with her. We have talked, and she has convinced herself it's just some sort of phase and wants to push on with more kids, marriage etc etc - I am not so sure this is wise. I feel incredible protective of her and wish to look after her but that spark of excitement and desire appears to be absent.
Her body and emotional state have been through the mill over the last couple of years being pregnant and then trying to bring up a newborn whilst finding out that you aren't happy... and she's still showing you affection and trying to understand how you feel??? Jesus Christ, at risk of repeating myself... you don't know how fking lucky you are.DoTheRightThing said:
To complicate matters a women from my past has recently featured in my life more and the level of passion and emotion we share is hard to put into words. Intellectually she challenges me and stretches me and I think I find this incredibly refreshing and nourishing. She has signalled her desire to take things further, even moving to be with me and giving up a top salary in London to do so..
Has it not registered that if your fiancé had more to think about than washing, ironing, stty nappies, prams, feed times,no sleep and a bloke she's st scared might be leaving her, she might have a bit of time to intellectually challenge???Of course you find this other bird refreshing and challenging, it's escapism. Lets see whether she regrets giving up her "top" salary in London when you're not with her because of your daughters birthday, illness or simply because she is missing you and wants some Daddy time because you aren't there for the first day at school? And while your being influenced by another piece of skirt you've got no chance of sorting it with the mother of your child at home. Cut off all ties, periodDoTheRightThing said:
I feel sick. I feel like if I stay where I am currently I will always wonder what could have been and possibly grow to resent my fiancé. Or simply live a kind of half existence where I have outwardly nothing at all to complain about but inwardly am looking for something quite different.
I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
That's exactly what you'll be doing, but not for long.Because if she's as fantastic as you claim her to be, she'll be happily sorted in a new relationship, hopefully with a bloke who doesn't look at her in pity and views her as intellectually inferior. Oh and for good measure your daughter will be calling him daddy ( or if you're luck Daddy2)and will be telling you in no time how he makes her laugh,and what a silly funny man he his...sounds great doesn't it?I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
DoTheRightThing said:
She is an amazing mother, cooks, cleans, ensures I have ironed shirts come Monday and host of other clichéd home-making abilities that our society appears to hold dear.
Along with loyalty and understanding as she seems to have them as well...Have I mentioned that you don't know how lucky you are?DoTheRightThing said:
My mother adores her, my brothers and their wife's adore her. She cares for the very sick and asks for little in return. So the mere mention of my unhappiness is met with consternation and disbelief. If I were to leave my fiancé I would be a pariah, my family would look on in disgust, her family who have been nothing but kind to me would be appalled. Society would no doubt judge me harshly and I would be racked with guilt. It would destroy her. I was brought up to value relationships. My mother and father stayed together until my fathers untimely death and I feel their influence strongly in this matter.
Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
And know what? You come across as a genuinely decent bloke, going through a real change of circumstances in your life. You've probably given up a few things trying to be a good partner, but still have mates doing their blokey stuff. You've realised the enormity of parenthood, with a (no doubt) tired partner and how that's going to be your life for the foreseeable future, not skirt chasing or grabbing the extra hours in the pub with your mates etc. Your not alone in thinking stuff like that,in fact it's understandable in many ways,but it's something you need to snap out of, and bloody quick.Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
Did I say how lucky you are?
It's also made me think that if I should a similar problem, NEVER to post a thread about it on PH. Fekkinell.
boroandy87 said:
Take your O/H on dates, do the things you did when you first met. If you can remember, take her to the first place you took her out to.
Agreed, although you may wish to consider where this was. Not so sure that the Mrs would be too chuffed if I suggested a romantic evening at Cambridge Services
Adenauer said:
sjc said:
DoTheRightThing said:
Anyway, I'm in a horrible situation.
First things first, you're not....your fiancé is.DoTheRightThing said:
I have a 18month year old daughter whom I love dearly and is the centre of my world. I have a beautiful, caring, patient and sensitive fiancé who loves me unconditionally and I know will stand by me until the end of our times. I have a large joint mortgage and a life with this women that is interwoven and has been built together.
You really really don't know how lucky you are mate.DoTheRightThing said:
But I am no longer IN love with this women, I don't think I am anyway. I feel myself tense when she shows physical affection and have found myself even turning my cheek when she attempts to kiss me. I can take or leave sex with her. We have talked, and she has convinced herself it's just some sort of phase and wants to push on with more kids, marriage etc etc - I am not so sure this is wise. I feel incredible protective of her and wish to look after her but that spark of excitement and desire appears to be absent.
Her body and emotional state have been through the mill over the last couple of years being pregnant and then trying to bring up a newborn whilst finding out that you aren't happy... and she's still showing you affection and trying to understand how you feel??? Jesus Christ, at risk of repeating myself... you don't know how fking lucky you are.DoTheRightThing said:
To complicate matters a women from my past has recently featured in my life more and the level of passion and emotion we share is hard to put into words. Intellectually she challenges me and stretches me and I think I find this incredibly refreshing and nourishing. She has signalled her desire to take things further, even moving to be with me and giving up a top salary in London to do so..
Has it not registered that if your fiancé had more to think about than washing, ironing, stty nappies, prams, feed times,no sleep and a bloke she's st scared might be leaving her, she might have a bit of time to intellectually challenge???Of course you find this other bird refreshing and challenging, it's escapism. Lets see whether she regrets giving up her "top" salary in London when you're not with her because of your daughters birthday, illness or simply because she is missing you and wants some Daddy time because you aren't there for the first day at school? And while your being influenced by another piece of skirt you've got no chance of sorting it with the mother of your child at home. Cut off all ties, periodDoTheRightThing said:
I feel sick. I feel like if I stay where I am currently I will always wonder what could have been and possibly grow to resent my fiancé. Or simply live a kind of half existence where I have outwardly nothing at all to complain about but inwardly am looking for something quite different.
I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
That's exactly what you'll be doing, but not for long.Because if she's as fantastic as you claim her to be, she'll be happily sorted in a new relationship, hopefully with a bloke who doesn't look at her in pity and views her as intellectually inferior. Oh and for good measure your daughter will be calling him daddy ( or if you're luck Daddy2)and will be telling you in no time how he makes her laugh,and what a silly funny man he his...sounds great doesn't it?I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
DoTheRightThing said:
She is an amazing mother, cooks, cleans, ensures I have ironed shirts come Monday and host of other clichéd home-making abilities that our society appears to hold dear.
Along with loyalty and understanding as she seems to have them as well...Have I mentioned that you don't know how lucky you are?DoTheRightThing said:
My mother adores her, my brothers and their wife's adore her. She cares for the very sick and asks for little in return. So the mere mention of my unhappiness is met with consternation and disbelief. If I were to leave my fiancé I would be a pariah, my family would look on in disgust, her family who have been nothing but kind to me would be appalled. Society would no doubt judge me harshly and I would be racked with guilt. It would destroy her. I was brought up to value relationships. My mother and father stayed together until my fathers untimely death and I feel their influence strongly in this matter.
Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
And know what? You come across as a genuinely decent bloke, going through a real change of circumstances in your life. You've probably given up a few things trying to be a good partner, but still have mates doing their blokey stuff. You've realised the enormity of parenthood, with a (no doubt) tired partner and how that's going to be your life for the foreseeable future, not skirt chasing or grabbing the extra hours in the pub with your mates etc. Your not alone in thinking stuff like that,in fact it's understandable in many ways,but it's something you need to snap out of, and bloody quick.Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
Did I say how lucky you are?
It's also made me think that if I should a similar problem, NEVER to post a thread about it on PH. Fekkinell.
I'm 35 for whoever asked.
DoTheRightThing said:
Adenauer said:
sjc said:
DoTheRightThing said:
Anyway, I'm in a horrible situation.
First things first, you're not....your fiancé is.DoTheRightThing said:
I have a 18month year old daughter whom I love dearly and is the centre of my world. I have a beautiful, caring, patient and sensitive fiancé who loves me unconditionally and I know will stand by me until the end of our times. I have a large joint mortgage and a life with this women that is interwoven and has been built together.
You really really don't know how lucky you are mate.DoTheRightThing said:
But I am no longer IN love with this women, I don't think I am anyway. I feel myself tense when she shows physical affection and have found myself even turning my cheek when she attempts to kiss me. I can take or leave sex with her. We have talked, and she has convinced herself it's just some sort of phase and wants to push on with more kids, marriage etc etc - I am not so sure this is wise. I feel incredible protective of her and wish to look after her but that spark of excitement and desire appears to be absent.
Her body and emotional state have been through the mill over the last couple of years being pregnant and then trying to bring up a newborn whilst finding out that you aren't happy... and she's still showing you affection and trying to understand how you feel??? Jesus Christ, at risk of repeating myself... you don't know how fking lucky you are.DoTheRightThing said:
To complicate matters a women from my past has recently featured in my life more and the level of passion and emotion we share is hard to put into words. Intellectually she challenges me and stretches me and I think I find this incredibly refreshing and nourishing. She has signalled her desire to take things further, even moving to be with me and giving up a top salary in London to do so..
Has it not registered that if your fiancé had more to think about than washing, ironing, stty nappies, prams, feed times,no sleep and a bloke she's st scared might be leaving her, she might have a bit of time to intellectually challenge???Of course you find this other bird refreshing and challenging, it's escapism. Lets see whether she regrets giving up her "top" salary in London when you're not with her because of your daughters birthday, illness or simply because she is missing you and wants some Daddy time because you aren't there for the first day at school? And while your being influenced by another piece of skirt you've got no chance of sorting it with the mother of your child at home. Cut off all ties, periodDoTheRightThing said:
I feel sick. I feel like if I stay where I am currently I will always wonder what could have been and possibly grow to resent my fiancé. Or simply live a kind of half existence where I have outwardly nothing at all to complain about but inwardly am looking for something quite different.
I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
That's exactly what you'll be doing, but not for long.Because if she's as fantastic as you claim her to be, she'll be happily sorted in a new relationship, hopefully with a bloke who doesn't look at her in pity and views her as intellectually inferior. Oh and for good measure your daughter will be calling him daddy ( or if you're luck Daddy2)and will be telling you in no time how he makes her laugh,and what a silly funny man he his...sounds great doesn't it?I feel that if I leave I will be ruining my fiancés life, depriving my daughter of the secure and stable environment I enjoyed as a child, and removing the opportunity for her to enjoy siblings, family Christmas', family holidays.... it's just too much to bear and brings me to a juddering and tearful halt.
DoTheRightThing said:
She is an amazing mother, cooks, cleans, ensures I have ironed shirts come Monday and host of other clichéd home-making abilities that our society appears to hold dear.
Along with loyalty and understanding as she seems to have them as well...Have I mentioned that you don't know how lucky you are?DoTheRightThing said:
My mother adores her, my brothers and their wife's adore her. She cares for the very sick and asks for little in return. So the mere mention of my unhappiness is met with consternation and disbelief. If I were to leave my fiancé I would be a pariah, my family would look on in disgust, her family who have been nothing but kind to me would be appalled. Society would no doubt judge me harshly and I would be racked with guilt. It would destroy her. I was brought up to value relationships. My mother and father stayed together until my fathers untimely death and I feel their influence strongly in this matter.
Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
And know what? You come across as a genuinely decent bloke, going through a real change of circumstances in your life. You've probably given up a few things trying to be a good partner, but still have mates doing their blokey stuff. You've realised the enormity of parenthood, with a (no doubt) tired partner and how that's going to be your life for the foreseeable future, not skirt chasing or grabbing the extra hours in the pub with your mates etc. Your not alone in thinking stuff like that,in fact it's understandable in many ways,but it's something you need to snap out of, and bloody quick.Perhaps it is simply my duty to put my daughter and fiancé first and cast this other woman (and life) aside. But something about that feels wrong. You only get one go at this life.
I am really unhappy right now.
It feels like my life is on the brink of destruction.
Thanks for listening anyway.
Did I say how lucky you are?
It's also made me think that if I should a similar problem, NEVER to post a thread about it on PH. Fekkinell.
I'm 35 for whoever asked.
Good luck whatever avenue you take.
There are some very sensible responses on this thread - some pretty brutal, most fair.
It isn't easy becoming a parent - the mother can feel less like a woman and more like a professional wiper, with limited subjects to talk about and no desire/time to look their best.
Meanwhile the father often feels suddenly older and stuck in the role of provider without any of the fun they had in the past.
Given this, is it therefore surprising that, when offered a way "back to the future" you are interested? No.
It takes dedication and effort to work through the rough patch and fall back in love.
The question, OP, is whether you have the grit and determination?
What I do know, whether you succeed or not, is that the other woman is not the answer and is just simply conveniently available.
I suggest you put the effort in, do your level best and so, if it doesn't work out with your fiancee, there will be some acceptance from both of you that it wasn't for lack of trying.
More importantly, in terms of practical actions, I suggest;
1 One night out per week - if you don't have convenient family, use Sitters.
2 Each of you get a weekend off per month whilst the other one looks after the baby - everyone needs personal time, and you simply don't get it with a baby around unless you schedule it.
3 Get friends with similar aged kids around for Sunday lunch - kids occupy each other and you get to swap war stories that make you realise everyone is going through the same thing to a certain extent.
If I may be so bold, many of us have been where you are now, and most of those worked through it. You just have to want to.
DoTheRightThing said:
I don't mind. sjc has voiced his opinions without the abject glee others seem unable resist.
I'm 35 for whoever asked.
100% of people you have asked have said you would be stupid.I'm 35 for whoever asked.
Still, you posted this thread hoping for someone who advises you to do it so you can cling to their post and make yourself feel better.
Well here you go then:
I think you should do it. You are not the same as the 100% of people who have advised you against it. You are unique. You're the man!
If your feelings to your 18 month old are such that you would leave her to shag some home-wrecking slapper then go for it. No loss to her by the sound of it.
You are the most important thing in your life, as is obvious to everyone else, so off you go - you'll be doing your family a favour in the long term and if you don't go you'll only end up feeling sorry for yourself and dragging them down with you (although you almost certainly won't notice that you are)
blindswelledrat said:
DoTheRightThing said:
I don't mind. sjc has voiced his opinions without the abject glee others seem unable resist.
I'm 35 for whoever asked.
100% of people you have asked have said you would be stupid.I'm 35 for whoever asked.
Still, you posted this thread hoping for someone who advises you to do it so you can cling to their post and make yourself feel better.
Well here you go then:
I think you should do it. You are not the same as the 100% of people who have advised you against it. You are unique. You're the man!
If your feelings to your 18 month old are such that you would leave her to shag some home-wrecking slapper then go for it. No loss to her by the sound of it.
You are the most important thing in your life, as is obvious to everyone else, so off you go - you'll be doing your family a favour in the long term and if you don't go you'll only end up feeling sorry for yourself and dragging them down with you (although you almost certainly won't notice that you are)
you never know! She might be impressed you remembered. Also, they've upgraded those I hear!Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff