Being told " I don't love you anymore"
Discussion
Anyone had this?
Before you say, no pics, no-one else involved, just came out the blue tonight.
20 years, from 16 years old, no kids, live and work together, not one problem in 20 years, one slip-up a few years back when she had depression, but thats it.
Says she still cares for me, doesn't want me to move out, but sat here now (pissed) wondering "wtf"
Reckon this is it chaps?
Before you say, no pics, no-one else involved, just came out the blue tonight.
20 years, from 16 years old, no kids, live and work together, not one problem in 20 years, one slip-up a few years back when she had depression, but thats it.
Says she still cares for me, doesn't want me to move out, but sat here now (pissed) wondering "wtf"
Reckon this is it chaps?
You deserve someone who DOES love you. Don't waste energy on someone who doesn't.
By all means be amicable and respect her decision and her honesty but it's time to strap a pair on.
Dig deep and find your self respect. Organise an amicable separation and move on.
Happened to me (hasn't it happened to most?). A mate said to me when I was going through it, what advice would you give to me if I were in your position?
What advice would you give to a friend if he were in the same boat?
Life is short. You both deserve happiness. Go find yours.
Good luck
By all means be amicable and respect her decision and her honesty but it's time to strap a pair on.
Dig deep and find your self respect. Organise an amicable separation and move on.
Happened to me (hasn't it happened to most?). A mate said to me when I was going through it, what advice would you give to me if I were in your position?
What advice would you give to a friend if he were in the same boat?
Life is short. You both deserve happiness. Go find yours.
Good luck
Edited by B17NNS on Saturday 22 November 23:17
B17NNS said:
You deserve someone who DOES love you. Don't waste energy on someone who doesn't.
By all means be amicable and respect her decision and her honesty but it's time to strap a pair on.
Dig deep and find your self respect. Organise an amicable separation and move on.
Life is short. You both deserve happiness. Go find yours.
Good luck
This 100%By all means be amicable and respect her decision and her honesty but it's time to strap a pair on.
Dig deep and find your self respect. Organise an amicable separation and move on.
Life is short. You both deserve happiness. Go find yours.
Good luck
Just accept it - by the time that comes out she's already planning her exit strategy.
Be civil, no lawyers, be amicable and without anger.
Just as you can't help chemistry with someone sometimes you can't stop it from fading. Brave and decent move by your (soon to be) ex by being honest with you without finding someone else first.
Be civil, no lawyers, be amicable and without anger.
Just as you can't help chemistry with someone sometimes you can't stop it from fading. Brave and decent move by your (soon to be) ex by being honest with you without finding someone else first.
Is it possible to live with somebody if you don't "love" them,....... you can "like" them, "respect" them etc.
Isn't "love" something that only happens to sixteen year old schoolgirls living in a fantasy world?
btw, We have been happily married 34 years.............I was just posing the question.
Isn't "love" something that only happens to sixteen year old schoolgirls living in a fantasy world?
btw, We have been happily married 34 years.............I was just posing the question.
visitinglondon said:
Usually means she's seeing someone else ...
This is my experience, happened to me once. I've also had a few mates that had the it's not you it's me or I don't love you spiel. Then the wife met a new bloke at work you've never heard of five minutes after the bloke moved out.Another thing, if a woman tells you she doesn't love you then I'm sorry to say she doesn't love you.
You still made an effort though right, still went to the gym, held of on the cakes etc?
Yes, had this and more. fking stinks, doesn't it - you sincerely have my sympathy.
We 'met' again after decades, via 'Friends Reunited'. She wanted me to flirt and ended up visiting. We married the next year.
Ten years on, the secret inscription in the signet ring she bought me is now "your thing". The loving verses I put in birthday, Christmas and anniversary cards became, "Well, you can write anything." My being in the room when she gets things out of her underwear drawer is "creepy". (Her) booze was the catalyst - it always was.
We're separated and she wants to go to court over the divorce. Meanwhile, my legal mate is bankrolling my solicitor's fees.
That's life on the razor's edge, which also fking stinks.
We 'met' again after decades, via 'Friends Reunited'. She wanted me to flirt and ended up visiting. We married the next year.
Ten years on, the secret inscription in the signet ring she bought me is now "your thing". The loving verses I put in birthday, Christmas and anniversary cards became, "Well, you can write anything." My being in the room when she gets things out of her underwear drawer is "creepy". (Her) booze was the catalyst - it always was.
We're separated and she wants to go to court over the divorce. Meanwhile, my legal mate is bankrolling my solicitor's fees.
That's life on the razor's edge, which also fking stinks.
TheLordJohn said:
Pommygranite said:
Just accept it - by the time that comes out she's already planning her exit strategy.
Most useful/appropriate post on this thread! st news OP. Good luck getting sorted out
Wolfer said:
Anyone had this?
Before you say, no pics, no-one else involved, just came out the blue tonight.
20 years, from 16 years old, no kids, live and work together, not one problem in 20 years, one slip-up a few years back when she had depression, but thats it.
Says she still cares for me, doesn't want me to move out, but sat here now (pissed) wondering "wtf"
Reckon this is it chaps?
Leave.Before you say, no pics, no-one else involved, just came out the blue tonight.
20 years, from 16 years old, no kids, live and work together, not one problem in 20 years, one slip-up a few years back when she had depression, but thats it.
Says she still cares for me, doesn't want me to move out, but sat here now (pissed) wondering "wtf"
Reckon this is it chaps?
Wolfer said:
Cheers guys,
night on the sofabed, just trying to be strong.
Think I'll have to accept it as over, suppose I'd better tell my family later, that will be nice!
It might be nicer than you think, right now you are on your 4rse but your family will always be there for you.night on the sofabed, just trying to be strong.
Think I'll have to accept it as over, suppose I'd better tell my family later, that will be nice!
Stay strong.
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