How Would You Feel If I Did This To Your Child.

[9mm]

ATG said:

Some have suggested leaving the discipline to the parents. Might be worth considering that a bking from a stranger tells the kid that there are societal norms that they've got to stick to. It isn't just their parents who expect them to behave well, it's all of us. Understanding that is a key part of learning to respect other people, and that in turn is a prerequisite for learning self respect.

Exactly, parents aren't the sole arbiters of what's acceptable and what isn't, nor do they have the sole right to act on breaches of societal norms. Clearly there are limits to what outsiders should do but 'leaving it to the parents' isn't an acceptable norm.

[Tannedbaldhead]

9mm said:

ATG said:

Some have suggested leaving the discipline to the parents. Might be worth considering that a bking from a stranger tells the kid that there are societal norms that they've got to stick to. It isn't just their parents who expect them to behave well, it's all of us. Understanding that is a key part of learning to respect other people, and that in turn is a prerequisite for learning self respect.

Exactly, parents aren't the sole arbiters of what's acceptable and what isn't, nor do they have the sole right to act on breaches of societal norms. Clearly there are limits to what outsiders should do but 'leaving it to the parents' isn't an acceptable norm.

It takes a village to raise a child.

[Monkeythree]

9mm said:

ATG said:

Some have suggested leaving the discipline to the parents. Might be worth considering that a bking from a stranger tells the kid that there are societal norms that they've got to stick to. It isn't just their parents who expect them to behave well, it's all of us. Understanding that is a key part of learning to respect other people, and that in turn is a prerequisite for learning self respect.

Exactly, parents aren't the sole arbiters of what's acceptable and what isn't, nor do they have the sole right to act on breaches of societal norms. Clearly there are limits to what outsiders should do but 'leaving it to the parents' isn't an acceptable norm.

I agree. I think it is the consistency of the message that is important. I have told all of my close friends that I am happy for them to discipline my children as they would their own. It's interesting to see how my kids react when they think they might have got away with a misdemeanour because they thought we weren't watching only to be caught and reprimanded by another parent delivering the exact same bking they thought they had avoided.

I also sometimes pass the conch to one of my chums just so that my kids hear the message from someone other than me. It's actually quite a powerful tool.