Ridiculously overblown job titles.

[nick s]

Silverbullet767 said:

Don't forget Senior.

(I might have senior in my job title as part of my work)

Whenever I see Senior before a job title, I always just assume they've been at the company a long time and aren't good enough to get promoted, so are just given Senior to put in front of their name to A) Keep them in the job. B) Show that they've been at the company longer than people without senior in front of their title!

It's basically a pretend promotion to make someone feel good.

[ZOLLAR]

Council Baby said:

It's to make the juniors feel more important so they can large it to women, in the pub and stroke their egos.

Kind regards,

CB

Director Of Group Special Ho Interference Team

Bit rich coming from a Goatee'd, Powerfully built company director!

(only one of those descriptions is true )

[SpeckledJim]

Job title inflation in lieu of pay rise.

Its a recession thing.

[Council Baby]

ZOLLAR said:

Bit rich coming from a Goatee'd, Powerfully built company director!

(only one of those descriptions is true )

Jealous because I'm a director?

[Sheepshanks]

Pixel Pusher said:

Officers.

When did all the top corporate position holders become Officers?

Chief Executive Officer.
Chief Operating Officer.
Chief Financial Officer.


I don't really care, I just wanted to join in.

It's an American thing - Officer there means the same as Director here.

In the UK, people have Director in their job title when they're not legally a Director of the company really irritates me. In the US, Director is as meaningless as VP.

[parakitaMol.]

My husband has 'The Ozzy Ozbourne of Oncology' on one of his signatures - most of his contracts don't permit such tomfoolery.

[ReaperCushions]

Sheepshanks said:

In the UK, people have Director in their job title when they're not legally a Director of the company really irritates me. In the US, Director is as meaningless as VP.

Indeed.

I work for a US company, and Director is effectively 'Junior Manager' and VP is 'Middle Manager'. It equates to managing about 3 people or 6 people respectively.

[ZOLLAR]

Council Baby said:

ZOLLAR said:

Bit rich coming from a Goatee'd, Powerfully built company director!

(only one of those descriptions is true )

Jealous because I'm a director?

[hacksaw]

Worked for a large UK manufacturing company several years ago when overnight, by magic, storemen where replaced with logistics coordinators. Hmmmmmm

[anonymous-user]

lukefreeman said:

Steamer said:

Windows Engineer

• like*

You need to be more specific, does it mean works with Windows or instal windows i don't want a nerdy computer geek fixing my Windows and vice versa

[Council Baby]

ZOLLAR said:

You're hired.

Choose your own title, they don't matter anyway.

[ZOLLAR]

Council Baby said:

ZOLLAR said:

You're hired.

Choose your own title, they don't matter anyway.

Head of management and diversity co-ordination review analyst.

Can I choose my salary too?

[stuttgartmetal]

Billy Butlin-ism

[Gargamel]

OP in the dark ages I am afraid.

Personnel is so 1980's

And yes Talent Acquisition is my job title...

Should I leave now?

[Council Baby]

ZOLLAR said:

Head of management and diversity co-ordination review analyst.

Can I choose my salary too?

As long as it's minimum wage, yes. It's all I can afford.

[PHmember]

Someone on The Apprentice described themselves as an 'unemployed telecommunications entrepreneur' (from memory) - er, so you're currently not doing anything??

Jesus wept, I think I'll start calling myself an 'unemployed astronaut'.

[vikingaero]

My brother used to have the job title of: "director of investment planning and strategy european operations".

The European part was a red herring because he could speak Japanese his role was basically wining/dining and escorting Japanese execs to whack the Corporate strip club accounts and blackmail them into deals the next day.

[E36GUY]

Had a mate who was very senior at Innocent Smoothies once upon a time. His job title was 'Top Banana' and it was on his card.

[Sheepshanks]

E36GUY said:

Had a mate who was very senior at Innocent Smoothies once upon a time. His job title was 'Top Banana' and it was on his card.

In a similar vein I knew someone at a video graphics company and he had VP Cool Stuff on his business card.

[Chris Type R]

speedyguy said:

You need to be more specific, does it mean works with Windows or instal windows i don't want a nerdy computer geek fixing my Windows and vice versa

Wouldn't the nerdy geek fix your Windows, and not your windows....

(IT Geek)