Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2

[RizzoTheRat]

Frimley111R said:

"Clink Clunk"

That was the terrifying noise of Seville creeping up behind him as a kid

[TwigtheWonderkid]

Clunk click every trip. There was a joke about this at the time, 3 guys in hospital with various injuries. Vicar doing the rounds talking to people, the first two have various limbs in plaster, and both tell a tale of woe, how they were only going 100 yrds down the road so didn't bother with seat belt, and went thru windscreen.

3rd guy has far more serious injuries, vicar asked him if he went thru windscreen, and he says "No, I was just walking down the road eating a peach and someone smashed me in the face with a hammer."

You'll need to be old enough to remember the ad to get the joke.

[Trabi601]

DELETED: Comment made by a member who's account has been deleted.

There's a little clue in that you can see which wheels are steered.

Forget 4WS, as almost everyone who isn't a car anorak wouldn't have a clue that it was either possible, or you could buy a car that did it.

[gowmonster]

Antony Moxey said:

gowmonster said:

Antony Moxey said:

HappyMidget said:

Antony Moxey said:

Why does knowing whether your car is front or rear wheel drive a safety issue when driving at 70mph on the motorway?

In my experience if you hit standing water they handle differently.

Never really noticed, and certainly never modified my driving style depending on whether I'm in a FWD, AWD or RWD car.

did you watch the F1 at the weekend? if you you'll notice that quite a few were hitting standing water at turn one and spinning off, same principal in a RWD car on the motorway, if your car has traction control it will most likely save you, if not, when one grips it will probably spin you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VToxPV643AM&fe...

frontwheel drive, you'll understeer then grip then probably spin out.

5th gear did a thing on when you put your new tyres on the car, depending on where you put them and hit standing water can result in different behaviour. I can't find the link though...

When I'm driving along a straight motorway at 70mph I'm not going flat out on racing tyres...

but if you hit standing water of a depth of 4mm and you don't have 4mm of tread what do you think might happen?

[DervVW]

gowmonster said:

Antony Moxey said:

gowmonster said:

Antony Moxey said:

HappyMidget said:

Antony Moxey said:

Why does knowing whether your car is front or rear wheel drive a safety issue when driving at 70mph on the motorway?

In my experience if you hit standing water they handle differently.

Never really noticed, and certainly never modified my driving style depending on whether I'm in a FWD, AWD or RWD car.

did you watch the F1 at the weekend? if you you'll notice that quite a few were hitting standing water at turn one and spinning off, same principal in a RWD car on the motorway, if your car has traction control it will most likely save you, if not, when one grips it will probably spin you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VToxPV643AM&fe...

frontwheel drive, you'll understeer then grip then probably spin out.

5th gear did a thing on when you put your new tyres on the car, depending on where you put them and hit standing water can result in different behaviour. I can't find the link though...

When I'm driving along a straight motorway at 70mph I'm not going flat out on racing tyres...

but if you hit standing water of a depth of 4mm and you don't have 4mm of tread what do you think might happen?

WEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

[GroundEffect]

gowmonster said:

but if you hit standing water of a depth of 4mm and you don't have 4mm of tread what do you think might happen?

...it doesn't work like that.

[hast2]

I remember when this thread was full of amusing antidotes of things ladies had said

[Shakermaker]

hast2 said:

I remember when this thread was full of amusing antidotes of things ladies had said

Yesterday evening, wife was on the phone to her mum who has just been on holiday to France, and was on the ferry waiting to get off. She then does that thing where she recounts the entire conversation to me after the phone call, even though I was sat in the room with her whilst she was on the phone and could pretty much hear everything her mum said as well.

But then wife asks "How do they get the cars off the ferry from France because they drive on the wrong side of the road?"

[bomma220]

Trabi601 said:

There's a little clue in that you can see which wheels are steered.

Forget 4WS, as almost everyone who isn't a car anorak wouldn't have a clue that it was either possible, or you could buy a car that did it.

Your missus actually said that?

[Antony Moxey]

gowmonster said:

Antony Moxey said:

gowmonster said:

Antony Moxey said:

HappyMidget said:

Antony Moxey said:

Why does knowing whether your car is front or rear wheel drive a safety issue when driving at 70mph on the motorway?

In my experience if you hit standing water they handle differently.

Never really noticed, and certainly never modified my driving style depending on whether I'm in a FWD, AWD or RWD car.

did you watch the F1 at the weekend? if you you'll notice that quite a few were hitting standing water at turn one and spinning off, same principal in a RWD car on the motorway, if your car has traction control it will most likely save you, if not, when one grips it will probably spin you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VToxPV643AM&fe...

frontwheel drive, you'll understeer then grip then probably spin out.

5th gear did a thing on when you put your new tyres on the car, depending on where you put them and hit standing water can result in different behaviour. I can't find the link though...

When I'm driving along a straight motorway at 70mph I'm not going flat out on racing tyres...

but if you hit standing water of a depth of 4mm and you don't have 4mm of tread what do you think might happen?

Depends on how long the patch of water is I suppose. Like most people I've driven through plenty of puddles at a variety of speeds in 4WD, RWD and FWD cars without crashing in a fiery ball of death. I must be some sort of driving god I'd imagine.

[AW111]

Antony Moxey said:

Depends on how long the patch of water is I suppose. Like most people I've driven through plenty of puddles at a variety of speeds in 4WD, RWD and FWD cars without crashing in a fiery ball of death. I must be some sort of driving god I'd imagine.

The water puts the flames out?

[Antony Moxey]

Good point :-)

[Alex@POD]

hast2 said:

I remember when this thread was full of amusing antidotes of things ladies had said

It was good too, with all the poisons knocking around here...

[AW111]

Alex@POD said:

hast2 said:

I remember when this thread was full of amusing antidotes of things ladies had said

It was good too, with all the poisons knocking around here...

Definitely something fishy going on.

[stuttgartmetal]

AstonZagato said:

stuttgartmetal said:

Timmy40 said:

Quite.

I wish they'd bring back those public information films, everyone laughed at them but things like the 3 second rule,

well remembered.

Except is was the two second rule:
"Only a fool breaks the two second rule"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mf5d2DP4Pp0

You don't say.

[Timmy40]

I dunno about a classic but I just got told by the wife, who has fallen out with the Nanny, that I've got to sort the mess out because the only reason she has a Nanny is to allow me to work! How very inconsiderate of me.

[PH5121]

My wife woke me at 4.55 am this morning to ask what that noise was, obviously I couldn't answer her question as prior to her asking it I was asleep.

She either dreamt it or it was the cat, never mind as within 60 seconds she was fast asleep again and I have been awake since. Cheers love!

[Evangelion]

Shakermaker said:

Yesterday evening, wife was on the phone to her mum who has just been on holiday to France, and was on the ferry waiting to get off. She then does that thing where she recounts the entire conversation to me after the phone call, even though I was sat in the room with her whilst she was on the phone and could pretty much hear everything her mum said as well.

My God, you should know that women ALWAYS do this. Ask a man how something went and he'll tell you where he was, what happened and what the outcome was. That's it.
But a woman will tell you every single word that was said by everyone present, all the time she was there, regardless of whether it was relevant or not.

[DervVW]

Evangelion said:

Shakermaker said:

Yesterday evening, wife was on the phone to her mum who has just been on holiday to France, and was on the ferry waiting to get off. She then does that thing where she recounts the entire conversation to me after the phone call, even though I was sat in the room with her whilst she was on the phone and could pretty much hear everything her mum said as well.

My God, you should know that women ALWAYS do this. Ask a man how something went and he'll tell you where he was, what happened and what the outcome was. That's it.
But a woman will tell you every single word that was said by everyone present, all the time she was there, regardless of whether it was relevant or not.

The colour and what people are wearing....

[HTP99]

DervVW said:

Evangelion said:

Shakermaker said:

Yesterday evening, wife was on the phone to her mum who has just been on holiday to France, and was on the ferry waiting to get off. She then does that thing where she recounts the entire conversation to me after the phone call, even though I was sat in the room with her whilst she was on the phone and could pretty much hear everything her mum said as well.

My God, you should know that women ALWAYS do this. Ask a man how something went and he'll tell you where he was, what happened and what the outcome was. That's it.
But a woman will tell you every single word that was said by everyone present, all the time she was there, regardless of whether it was relevant or not.

The colour and what people are wearing....

MIL is like that; when she tells you something, halfway through you have lost the will to live!!