Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2
Discussion
Mrs 2CV is pregnant so the sheer frequency of the classics has gone through the roof... only problem is that they aren't always funny...
- for the last 2 days running she's arrange for tradesmen to come round to price up various jobs, not told me, and then forgotten herself and gone out, leaving me and these random blokes to somehow work out what she could possibly have wanted pricing
- One tradesman did actually come around when she was in tonight, and she stared at him blankly for fully 30 seconds to the point i had to step in to assist because it was getting weird... only then did she remember herself what he was there for... although instead of talking to him about that, she rabbited at him about all sorts of random things whilst he pulled a slightly freaked out face. Decided that it would have been better if she had just forgotten and gone out, as previous
- another tradesmen related one... told me the guy did NOT want paying cash. Turns out he does want paying cash. She sends me off to the ATM (which I have to drive to) to get £200 out. I come back with £200 and she tells me it's £300. I come back with £300 and she tells me £400.
- she put milk in the oven. Standard.
- cooked 8 portions of a nice meal and promptly left it out for 24hrs whereupon it became inedible
- on an hourly basis tells me she has text me details of various things, so far none of which have actually arrived on my phone... oo mystery!
tribbles said:
Not always true.
My brother had a house built in France, and the road was numbered based on the order in which the houses were built. So you could find number 7 nestled between number 2 and number 15.
Oh I didn't mean they do that exclusively, just that it happens in quite a few places... As an aside, where else would number 7 be except between 2 and 15?My brother had a house built in France, and the road was numbered based on the order in which the houses were built. So you could find number 7 nestled between number 2 and number 15.
Alex@POD said:
tribbles said:
Not always true.
My brother had a house built in France, and the road was numbered based on the order in which the houses were built. So you could find number 7 nestled between number 2 and number 15.
Oh I didn't mean they do that exclusively, just that it happens in quite a few places... As an aside, where else would number 7 be except between 2 and 15?My brother had a house built in France, and the road was numbered based on the order in which the houses were built. So you could find number 7 nestled between number 2 and number 15.
Alex@POD said:
Evangelion said:
I think he means that 2 and 15 are next to 7.
Oh, as in the other numbers were all over the place? I'd like to see that, as it makes no sense!IIRC, his house was at the end of the road, and was number 7. His neighbour was number 4, and a new house that was built after my brother's was number 8 - but was between 4 and 3. So at the end of the road, it was numbered 3, 8, 4, 7.
Wife wanted to update one of her savings accounts to paperless statements last night.
Logs in to her account on the iPad and finds the relevant info under FAQs, the direction is 'follow the guidance from your account statement page'.
She hands me the iPad and scurries off, thinking wtf is she going I click on her statement, see the link to adopt paperless statements and set it up.
Shes comes back into the room clutching a handful of old statements, furiously reading them, I ask what she's doing and it turns out she was looking for the instructions on how to set up paperless statements on her hard copy statement!
She did see the funny side when I pulled her up on it.
Logs in to her account on the iPad and finds the relevant info under FAQs, the direction is 'follow the guidance from your account statement page'.
She hands me the iPad and scurries off, thinking wtf is she going I click on her statement, see the link to adopt paperless statements and set it up.
Shes comes back into the room clutching a handful of old statements, furiously reading them, I ask what she's doing and it turns out she was looking for the instructions on how to set up paperless statements on her hard copy statement!
She did see the funny side when I pulled her up on it.
vx220 said:
Not MrsVX...
"I've been playing tag of war with the dog"
Me: "it's tug of war, not tag"
Blank look...
"You're both trying to tug the rope, so tug of war"
Blank look...
"WHAT DOES TAG OF WAR EVEN MEAN!?!?"
Looks at ceiling, trying to work it out...
it could be a way of settling conflicts without the need for widespread destruction and death....."I've been playing tag of war with the dog"
Me: "it's tug of war, not tag"
Blank look...
"You're both trying to tug the rope, so tug of war"
Blank look...
"WHAT DOES TAG OF WAR EVEN MEAN!?!?"
Looks at ceiling, trying to work it out...
set a time period and whoever is "it" at the end is the loser...meanwhile the other countries get to point at them and go ner-ner n-ner-ner....
it could catch on!
Woman in my office is taking my company car today, as she doesn't have one and needs to attend a work meeting. So she gets in, I'm in passenger seat setting up satnav for her, and her feet are miles from the pedals and she cannot even reach steering wheel. Not surprising really, she's 5'0 and I'm 6'1.
Her : Oh, I can't reach the pedals.
Me: You'll need to put the seat forward and raise it.
Her: I didn't want to do that, because I know how annoying it is for you when you have to try and get it back in position.
OK...it may be mildly irritating but ffs! Is there an alternative?
Her : Oh, I can't reach the pedals.
Me: You'll need to put the seat forward and raise it.
Her: I didn't want to do that, because I know how annoying it is for you when you have to try and get it back in position.
OK...it may be mildly irritating but ffs! Is there an alternative?
The Mrs and I overheard a classic this weekend at hotel breakfast (guest was 40-something female btw):
Waitress: What can I get you?
Guest: 2 sausages, 2 bacon, beans, mushrooms...oh and 2 eggs.
Waitress: And how would you like your eggs cooked?
Guest: [leans in] what do you mean by that?
Waitress: [blinks in disbelief] ....oh you know, scrambled? poached? fried?
Maybe you had to be there, but it made us both laugh a lot! I would have gone for medium-rare myself!
Waitress: What can I get you?
Guest: 2 sausages, 2 bacon, beans, mushrooms...oh and 2 eggs.
Waitress: And how would you like your eggs cooked?
Guest: [leans in] what do you mean by that?
Waitress: [blinks in disbelief] ....oh you know, scrambled? poached? fried?
Maybe you had to be there, but it made us both laugh a lot! I would have gone for medium-rare myself!
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Her : Oh, I can't reach the pedals.
Me: You'll need to put the seat forward and raise it.
Her: I didn't want to do that, because I know how annoying it is for you when you have to try and get it back in position.
OK...it may be mildly irritating but ffs! Is there an alternative?
Yes there is: Platform shoes and a booster cushion. Simples! Me: You'll need to put the seat forward and raise it.
Her: I didn't want to do that, because I know how annoying it is for you when you have to try and get it back in position.
OK...it may be mildly irritating but ffs! Is there an alternative?
Hope you manage to get it back in position OK. :nudge nudge:
Edited by glenrobbo on Tuesday 4th October 14:42
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