Discussion
Great thread this (rubs hands together) - where do we start.
Having a front garden thats got a garden gate but no trace of a fence or wall either side of it.
Feeling the need to play loud music with the house windows and/or patio doors wide open as soon as the sun comes out in the summer.
Having faded multicoloured kids pedal-cars and toys left in the front garden for years on end.
Being able to do your weekly shop in the council estate standard-issue row of shops - a discount booze shop, a newsagents whose windows are completely plastered with faded advertising stickers of stuff you can't get anymore, a hairdressers, launderette, kebab house/chippy, and a bookies.
Walking down the street, hoody up (even on a warm day) intermittently spitting for no apparent reason, and looking around in a suspicious manner with short jerky head movements as if somebody might be after you.
Watching, and laughing at Wayne and Waynetta Slob without realising it is YOU they are taking the piss out of.
Going out to a Harvester or Hungry Horse for a family occasion and thinking you're really living it up.
Adding after market tat to your Vectra/black Audi A3/Corsa/Mondeo/E36 3 series (c/w smashed rear light lens and overly-blue replacement headlight bulbs) - and taking it out in the genuine belief that people will look at you with respect and envy, when really ridicule and pity are the predominant emotions.
Buying snide TAG watches on holiday in Turkey and wearing them in the belief that passers by will think you are well off, but forgetting you are also wearing the standard issue chav uniform which rather gives the game away.
Ordering a pint of John Smiths bitter instead of your usual Carling and thinking you are now a fully clued up real ale drinker.
Having tatoos in plain view around your neck and wondering why you can't get a job.
Having a front garden thats got a garden gate but no trace of a fence or wall either side of it.
Feeling the need to play loud music with the house windows and/or patio doors wide open as soon as the sun comes out in the summer.
Having faded multicoloured kids pedal-cars and toys left in the front garden for years on end.
Being able to do your weekly shop in the council estate standard-issue row of shops - a discount booze shop, a newsagents whose windows are completely plastered with faded advertising stickers of stuff you can't get anymore, a hairdressers, launderette, kebab house/chippy, and a bookies.
Walking down the street, hoody up (even on a warm day) intermittently spitting for no apparent reason, and looking around in a suspicious manner with short jerky head movements as if somebody might be after you.
Watching, and laughing at Wayne and Waynetta Slob without realising it is YOU they are taking the piss out of.
Going out to a Harvester or Hungry Horse for a family occasion and thinking you're really living it up.
Adding after market tat to your Vectra/black Audi A3/Corsa/Mondeo/E36 3 series (c/w smashed rear light lens and overly-blue replacement headlight bulbs) - and taking it out in the genuine belief that people will look at you with respect and envy, when really ridicule and pity are the predominant emotions.
Buying snide TAG watches on holiday in Turkey and wearing them in the belief that passers by will think you are well off, but forgetting you are also wearing the standard issue chav uniform which rather gives the game away.
Ordering a pint of John Smiths bitter instead of your usual Carling and thinking you are now a fully clued up real ale drinker.
Having tatoos in plain view around your neck and wondering why you can't get a job.
Jamesgt said:
Cobnapint said:
Walking down the street, hoody up (even on a warm day) intermittently spitting for no apparent reason.
Spot on!The spitting I just don't get. Why why why?!?!
They should be made to lick it up every time they do it.
Jamesgt said:
Cobnapint said:
Walking down the street, hoody up (even on a warm day) intermittently spitting for no apparent reason.
Spot on!The spitting I just don't get. Why why why?!?!
Jamesgt said:
Cobnapint said:
Walking down the street, hoody up (even on a warm day) intermittently spitting for no apparent reason.
Spot on!The spitting I just don't get. Why why why?!?!
Goes with the grey track suit bottoms with the hands down the front.
Called at a house last night - pumpkin still on doorstep since last Halloween , and a yappy dog called........Dior.
(It wasn't a council house, though. I suspect they were tenants rather than owners. Not enough council houses to go round, so they privately rent - and you can tell by the state of the gardens.)
(It wasn't a council house, though. I suspect they were tenants rather than owners. Not enough council houses to go round, so they privately rent - and you can tell by the state of the gardens.)
Cobnapint said:
Great thread this (rubs hands together) - where do we start.
...
Feeling the need to play loud music with the house windows and/or patio doors wide open as soon as the sun comes out in the summer.
...
There is a compete a...
Feeling the need to play loud music with the house windows and/or patio doors wide open as soon as the sun comes out in the summer.
...
hole at the back of us that does that. Oddly they are all cheesy 80s 'hits'.Once you have heard Scorpions Wind of Change about five times the novelty wears off.
BrabusMog said:
I just discovered that I'm friends with someone on Facebook who had a niece called Paris Rihanna. /thread
Being friends on Facebook with someone who has a family member called Paris Rihanna.
BrabusMog said:
Cie said:
Posting about your tax rebate on Facebook and how you're "buzzing".
I agree about ITV as well. It's ridiculously council.
Having friends that would be "buzzing" about a tax rebate and posting it to Facebook.I agree about ITV as well. It's ridiculously council.
I do agree on ITV. I also like the phrase "ridiculously council"
Morningside said:
Cobnapint said:
Great thread this (rubs hands together) - where do we start.
...
Feeling the need to play loud music with the house windows and/or patio doors wide open as soon as the sun comes out in the summer.
...
There is a compete a...
Feeling the need to play loud music with the house windows and/or patio doors wide open as soon as the sun comes out in the summer.
...
hole at the back of us that does that. Oddly they are all cheesy 80s 'hits'.Once you have heard Scorpions Wind of Change about five times the novelty wears off.
Leaving your wheelie bin out on the pavement for 3 days after collection day, despite the fact that you, your mid 20s son, and 18 year old daughter walk past it when leaving/returning home.
Buy a puppy to replace your boyfriend when he dumped you, and then have minimal interaction with the dog, who naturally gets put out into the back garden and left to bark all fking day long. And dump all over the garden, so you have to spend half an hour with a carrier bag and a shovel clearing all the st away.
Have a funny sweet smell emanating from your son's bedroom window, to which you say "oh it must be something in the garden" - yes, it is organic, but wake up love, he's a pothead...
Buy a puppy to replace your boyfriend when he dumped you, and then have minimal interaction with the dog, who naturally gets put out into the back garden and left to bark all f
king day long. And dump all over the garden, so you have to spend half an hour with a carrier bag and a shovel clearing all the st away.Have a funny sweet smell emanating from your son's bedroom window, to which you say "oh it must be something in the garden" - yes, it is organic, but wake up love, he's a pothead...
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