Favourite quotes

[Konrod]

One I was taught years ago, and is absolutely true

"It's easier to get forgiveness than it is to get permission"

[Noodle1982]

It's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice - Scooter 1995

[King Herald]

'Imagination is more important than knowledge'. Albert Einstein.

I have it as my 'personal statement' on my company profile.

Everybody else has a half page of nauseating drivel about doing their best, being part of a team, how they want to inspire others yada yada.....

Am I a bad employee?

[LordGrover]

Noodle1982 said:

It's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice - Scooter 1995

I think it rather predates 1995 - I remember my grandmother saying that late 60's, early 70's. Pretty sure it wasn't her own work though.

[W124]

"Keep juggling for long enough and, sooner or later, you start to look like a clown" - somebody I used to buy gear off years ago. Stuck with me.

"We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light" - Attributed to Plato, but not him I think.

[Johnniem]

ArmaghMan said:

Cogito, ergo sum


I think,therefore I am.

Rene Descartes

"Rene Descartes was a drunken fart, I drink therefore I am" Monty Python....

[944fan]

King Herald said:

'Imagination is more important than knowledge'. Albert Einstein.

I have it as my 'personal statement' on my company profile.

Everybody else has a half page of nauseating drivel about doing their best, being part of a team, how they want to inspire others yada yada.....

Am I a bad employee?

You are a Man amongst Men

[Collectingbrass]

1.Use your hands on my daughter and you'll lose them after.
2.You make her cry, I make you cry.
3.Safe sex is a myth. Anything you try will be hazardous to your health.
4.Bring her home late, there's no next date.
5.If you pull into my driveway and honk, you better be dropping off a package because you're sure not picking anything up
6.No complaining while you're waiting for her. If you're bored, change my oil.
7.If your pants hang off your hips, I'll gladly secure them with my staple gun.
8.Dates must be in crowded public places. You want romance? Read a book.

[crossle]

Johnniem said:

ArmaghMan said:

Cogito, ergo sum


I think,therefore I am.

Rene Descartes

"Rene Descartes was a drunken fart, I drink therefore I am" Monty Python....

Rene Descartes was a very clever man,
He invented the philosophical scan,
"I think, therefore I am"
As a thinker there was no keener,
But he new f**k all about the Cortina

(Alexei Sayle)

[8Ace]

944fan said:

King Herald said:

'Imagination is more important than knowledge'. Albert Einstein.

I have it as my 'personal statement' on my company profile.

Everybody else has a half page of nauseating drivel about doing their best, being part of a team, how they want to inspire others yada yada.....

Am I a bad employee?

You are a Man amongst Men a load of benders

EFA. I hate all that bks too.

[br d]

My two faves (apologies if they've already been in.)

Tom Waits:
I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.

Frank Zappa when asked about Rock journalism:
People who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read.

[silverfoxcc]

Someone could put this right for me but along the lines of

As the speed of light is faster than the speed of sound, you can always recognise an idiot before he opens his mouth

[GuitarTech]

" I knew Doris Day before she was a virgin " Groucho Marx

" Procrastination is the thief of time " W.C.Fields

Lady Astor to Winston Churchill: " Sir, if you were my husband I'd poison your coffee "

Winston Churchill in reply: " Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it "

[CubanPete]

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice, in practice...



Uncle John, who runs a big HGV business. "You won't get that trailer in there"

Some bloke who works for my mates Uncle John, who runs a big HGV business. "I got that trailer out, I'll get it back in"

Uncle John "I had a st this morning, you try getting that back in"

[vinnie01]

He who hesitates masturbates....

Im not a rockstar i'm just an asshole that got lucky

The future's not set. There's no fate but what we make for ourselves.