I'm in turmoil over my brothers wedding !

[StuTheGrouch]

blindswelledrat said:

StuTheGrouch said:

blindswelledrat said:

Have a medal.
I feel sad for you that you see wedding lists as a guilt-trip.
Most normal not-bitter people see them as an opportunity to give a helping hand to a couple of newlyweds embarking on their new life together, after they have just indebted themselves up to the eyeballs to pay for you to come and share their day with them.
Good for you though.

Perhaps people shouldn't spend so much on weddings then if it's going to be a significant debt.

Perhaps people who are getting married can do whatever they want to do for their wedding, rather than pander to people who get irrelevantly annoyed about nothing? That's what I'm going for. Im forever amazed at the number of peple on this site who thinks that everything anyone else does should be about them and their opinions.

I don't care how others choose to get married and whether they want cash, st from gift lists or make no requests at all.

My point here is that people shouldn't expect to get into debt having a wedding and then hope (expect?) that guests will go some way to subsidising the wedding/honeymoon.

When I got married we racked up quite a bit of debt and I subsequently sold my RX8 to pay my share off. We didn't request money to pay it off.

[NRS]

StuTheGrouch said:

I don't care how others choose to get married and whether they want cash, st from gift lists or make no requests at all.

My point here is that people shouldn't expect to get into debt having a wedding and then hope (expect?) that guests will go some way to subsidising the wedding/honeymoon.

When I got married we racked up quite a bit of debt and I subsequently sold my RX8 to pay my share off. We didn't request money to pay it off.

You seem to be saying if they'd prefer money instead of their 4th toaster of the day that they don't need then it is only asking for it to pay for the wedding? I would want to give a gift, but I don't want to buy crap they won't use. So money is more use. It's not like the old days where they would have nothing for the house. Most will have a lot of stuff already, then when they settle down and move in they have to get rid of stuff because they have "doubles". Then they "have" to take gifts for the house because you think it's rude money would be more use for the mortage/ honeymoon etc?