When i am King/Demigod/lord of all
Discussion
500,0000 houses at a fixed price depending on number of bed rooms, no matter where in the UK, 10 year no selling rule, can never be rented rule.
Buyers must have been in the UK 16 years or longer, be employed and not committed a serous crime.
Priority to ex military personnel.
Public sector wages for high positions jobs wages capped at max at 100% above the national average salary, no bonus.
Public sector employees in high positions being sacked/resigning in disgrace will forfeit any pension or golden handshake.
Points system to be applied to MP votes in parliament to make it proportionate.
MP who represents a town of 1000 = 1 point, MP who represents a town of 2000 = 2 points etc.
Voting mandatory, the form will have a "no vote" option tick box though.
A life sentence will mean life US style = 99 years.
GDP military 5% spending by law, 80% of military kit must UK sourced, or built in factories set up in the UK.
Buyers must have been in the UK 16 years or longer, be employed and not committed a serous crime.
Priority to ex military personnel.
Public sector wages for high positions jobs wages capped at max at 100% above the national average salary, no bonus.
Public sector employees in high positions being sacked/resigning in disgrace will forfeit any pension or golden handshake.
Points system to be applied to MP votes in parliament to make it proportionate.
MP who represents a town of 1000 = 1 point, MP who represents a town of 2000 = 2 points etc.
Voting mandatory, the form will have a "no vote" option tick box though.
A life sentence will mean life US style = 99 years.
GDP military 5% spending by law, 80% of military kit must UK sourced, or built in factories set up in the UK.
People who stand in the queue for a till/ ticket machine/ cash point etc, and only fumble through their bag or pockets for what they need once they've reached it, holding everyone else up.
People who say 'i'm not being funny, but', or 'i'm not being racist, but'.
Put them all on an island and let them fight it out, Battle Royale style.
People who say 'i'm not being funny, but', or 'i'm not being racist, but'.
Put them all on an island and let them fight it out, Battle Royale style.
drivin_me_nuts said:
Mine are rather simple,
Those wearing low slung jeans will be made to wear their jeans from the inside out.
Anyone who utters the words 'init bruv' will be made to suffer in a prison cell listing to the audio book life story of Tony Blair( the sincere and uncut version), Charlotte Church( with full valleys dialect turned up to 11) and that useless dollop from the X factor, on repeat 24/7.
Anyone doing both the above gets to spend an extra year in chokey leaning how to enunciate their bowels properly.
Summary execution for those who fail to check for predictive text howlers.Those wearing low slung jeans will be made to wear their jeans from the inside out.
Anyone who utters the words 'init bruv' will be made to suffer in a prison cell listing to the audio book life story of Tony Blair( the sincere and uncut version), Charlotte Church( with full valleys dialect turned up to 11) and that useless dollop from the X factor, on repeat 24/7.
Anyone doing both the above gets to spend an extra year in chokey leaning how to enunciate their bowels properly.
1) Trucks would have to follow the mirror, signal manoeuvre method instead of chucking on indicator while in the middle of pulling out. Failure to do so is punishable by having to eat healthily for 1 month.
2) People that don't work are banned from using the roads between 07:00 - 09:00 and 16:00 - 17:30 weekdays. Failure to comply is having to read a book instead of watching Jeremy Kyle.
3) There is only 1 god and that's me.
4) Walking while talking on the phone, actually multitasking while on the phone is banned simply because so many people seem to find this difficult. This is punishable by having your phone inserted up your arse.
5) Rugby shall be made easy to understand.
6) I am the law.
2) People that don't work are banned from using the roads between 07:00 - 09:00 and 16:00 - 17:30 weekdays. Failure to comply is having to read a book instead of watching Jeremy Kyle.
3) There is only 1 god and that's me.
4) Walking while talking on the phone, actually multitasking while on the phone is banned simply because so many people seem to find this difficult. This is punishable by having your phone inserted up your arse.
5) Rugby shall be made easy to understand.
6) I am the law.
cirian75 said:
500,0000 houses at a fixed price depending on number of bed rooms, no matter where in the UK, 10 year no selling rule, can never be rented rule.
Buyers must have been in the UK 16 years or longer, be employed and not committed a serous crime.
Priority to ex military personnel.
Public sector wages for high positions jobs wages capped at max at 100% above the national average salary, no bonus.
Public sector employees in high positions being sacked/resigning in disgrace will forfeit any pension or golden handshake.
Points system to be applied to MP votes in parliament to make it proportionate.
MP who represents a town of 1000 = 1 point, MP who represents a town of 2000 = 2 points etc.
Voting mandatory, the form will have a "no vote" option tick box though.
A life sentence will mean life US style = 99 years.
GDP military 5% spending by law, 80% of military kit must UK sourced, or built in factories set up in the UK.
take your comman sense elsewhere!Buyers must have been in the UK 16 years or longer, be employed and not committed a serous crime.
Priority to ex military personnel.
Public sector wages for high positions jobs wages capped at max at 100% above the national average salary, no bonus.
Public sector employees in high positions being sacked/resigning in disgrace will forfeit any pension or golden handshake.
Points system to be applied to MP votes in parliament to make it proportionate.
MP who represents a town of 1000 = 1 point, MP who represents a town of 2000 = 2 points etc.
Voting mandatory, the form will have a "no vote" option tick box though.
A life sentence will mean life US style = 99 years.
GDP military 5% spending by law, 80% of military kit must UK sourced, or built in factories set up in the UK.
marshalla said:
shakotan said:
marshalla said:
citizensm1th said:
1. OAP's who food shop at the weekends first offence to be placed in the stocks until they mend their ways second offence shot.
2. Parents who take their children shopping in supermarkets hung drawn and quartered.
Anyone who can't punctuate or who doesn't know the correct past tense form of "hang", when used as a method of execution, will be publicly ridiculed on a motoring forum.2. Parents who take their children shopping in supermarkets hung drawn and quartered.
deckster said:
All laws scrapped and replaced with the single crime of 'being a nob', which would carry a mandatory sentence of Transportation to Basildon. Basildon itself would be secured by a 300ft-high wall with no doors or windows, which is no more than it deserves.
I like this a lot. I'm working in Basildon today and I can't wait to leave!When I'm king, Friday's and Monday's will become a part of the weekend. If people have to work on them, they're paid at at least double their hourly rate.
TankRizzo said:
bristolracer said:
shahira law
You must all obey the will of fat-arsed South American singers?whom i would quite willingly submit to
Meaningful judicial system introduced with life meaning life.... murderers let loose on Rockall with a weeks rations awarded for every cohabitant found to be missing....when population depletes add those guilty of sex or serial crimes....
Resultant savings to infrastructure, health & education..... UK sorted :-)
Resultant savings to infrastructure, health & education..... UK sorted :-)
Tim-D said:
Meaningful judicial system introduced with life meaning life.... murderers let loose on Rockall with a weeks rations awarded for every cohabitant found to be missing....when population depletes add those guilty of sex or serial crimes....
Resultant savings to infrastructure, health & education..... UK sorted :-)
Make sure you patent the reality TV rights, could be a future winner if the sResultant savings to infrastructure, health & education..... UK sorted :-)
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