Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 8)

[Usget]

Can we stop watch jokes now?

[EarlOfHazard]

Usget said:

Can we stop watch jokes now?

I'm strapped for watch jokes now.

[MartG]

Little Grandson: Grandad. Make a noise like a frog
Grandad: Why son?
Little Grandson: Because Dad says when you croak, were all going to live in Florida

[TheInternet]

silverfoxcc said:

My mate got the sack because he had a facial tick

Mine got done for embezelment.

[Iva Barchetta]

I heard this one on the telly the other day so probably a bit old.


What did one hat say to the other hat ?

You wait here,I'm going on a head.

I liked it.

[MartG]

Iva Barchetta said:

I heard this one on the telly the other day so probably a bit old.


What did one hat say to the other hat ?

You wait here,I'm going on a head.

I liked it.

Original was what the hat said to the scarf - you hang around while I go on ahead

[davhill]

Usget said:

Can we stop watch jokes now?

Stopwatch jokes?

[threespires]

Usget said:

Can we stop watch jokes now?

I second that

[Halmyre]

threespires said:

Usget said:

Can we stop watch jokes now?

I second that

Yes, they're just winding me up now.

[PoleDriver]

Latest news!
British man to appear in Las Vegas court for failing to shoot Donald Trump when the opportunity presented itself!

[GAjon]

Halmyre said:

threespires said:

Usget said:

Can we stop watch jokes now?

I second that

Yes, they're just winding me up now.

Someone will always Tag one on.

[Iva Barchetta]

GAjon said:

Halmyre said:

threespires said:

Usget said:

Can we stop watch jokes now?

I second that

Yes, they're just winding me up now.

Someone will always Tag one on.

It really is Timex to stop the jokes.

[Morningside]

MartG said:

Iva Barchetta said:

I heard this one on the telly the other day so probably a bit old.


What did one hat say to the other hat ?

You wait here,I'm going on a head.

I liked it.

Original was what the hat said to the scarf - you hang around while I go on ahead

Getting that bad are they? Right...

What is the definition of pain?

A fly sliding down a razorblade using his balls for brakes.

[crossle]

I'm sending my wife to a Swiss finishing school.

Or Dignitas, as they prefer to call it.

[crossle]

Iva Barchetta said:

GAjon said:

Halmyre said:

threespires said:

Usget said:

Can we stop watch jokes now?

I second that

Yes, they're just winding me up now.

Someone will always Tag one on.

It really is Timex to stop the jokes.

I had a digital watch tattooed on my arm, but a minute later I regretted it.

[ApOrbital]

Can we have some jokes please time waits for no man

[Jonboy_t]

ApOrbital said:

Can we have some jokes please time waits for no man

I Sekonda that. This is just a Weil-ed attempt at humour.

[ApOrbital]

Oh god let it stop please.

[Le TVR]

A Muslim has been shot with a starting pistol;
police say it's definitely race related.

[crossle]

Jonboy_t said:

ApOrbital said:

Can we have some jokes please time waits for no man

I Sekonda that. This is just a Weil-ed attempt at humour.

Heuer think you're talking to?