A bit council Vol 2
Discussion
J4CKO said:
She must have some kind of personality disorder to be like that, she cant be right to react like that, she parked in someone elses property, its oen thing stickign up for yourself when in the right but that it pretty shaky ground !
You've hit the nail on the head. It does seem to be a personality disorder. The trouble is, it's one which nobody is going to fix and the risk is it spreads to her spawn. We then have more like her. I sometimes feel parts of the world have become the kind of post apochaliptic nightmare portrayed in 80s teen films. Mad Max Beyond Ford Focus.
Shoegrip said:
J4CKO said:
She must have some kind of personality disorder to be like that, she cant be right to react like that, she parked in someone elses property, its oen thing stickign up for yourself when in the right but that it pretty shaky ground !
You've hit the nail on the head. It does seem to be a personality disorder. The trouble is, it's one which nobody is going to fix and the risk is it spreads to her spawn. We then have more like her. I sometimes feel parts of the world have become the kind of post apochaliptic nightmare portrayed in 80s teen films. Mad Max Beyond Ford Focus.
Shoegrip said:
J4CKO said:
She must have some kind of personality disorder to be like that, she cant be right to react like that, she parked in someone elses property, its oen thing stickign up for yourself when in the right but that it pretty shaky ground !
You've hit the nail on the head. It does seem to be a personality disorder. The trouble is, it's one which nobody is going to fix and the risk is it spreads to her spawn. We then have more like her. I sometimes feel parts of the world have become the kind of post apochaliptic nightmare portrayed in 80s teen films. Mad Max Beyond Ford Focus.
Defiantly brazening it out when you are clearly in the wrong makes you a stronger person.
I think this young lady is an extreme example of this.
Its the 2016 "How Council Are You?" Quiz.
Keep a tally of your scores.
1. You receive a letter from Vauxhall. What does it say?
A: "Dear Dazza. Our records indicate that you have still not arranged with us to have your Vauxhall Zafira returned to us for required recall work as directed to us by your Motability provider. This vehicle might catch fire at any time and despite our repeated letters, telephone calls and nationwide coverage in The Sun newspaper. You will not be able to claim we haven't told you about this.
B: Dear Mr Watkins. We would love to invite you to test drive the new Insignia and VXR Ranges at your local Approved Retailer, call us now to book a session.
C: Its just some marketing junk mail, straight onto the fireplace.
D: You'd rather not say. Its personal correspondance from your MP's London Residency in the borough and if word got out then he could face some rather unpleasant (but of course, unfounded) allegations in the press which would rather harm your mutual assets.
2. What benefits do you get?
A: Disability, cos you got a dodgy eardrum ever since that time you were stood next to an angle grider, you get 8 lots of child benefit for all your brats, you used to get job seekers but them b*stards stopped paying cos u aint had a job for 5 years, so u got to fight back innit next time your at the dole line!
B: Child benefit, for your 2, and the standard workplace pension.
C: Company car allowance which allows you to avoid leasing an Audi A4, better pension options, plus you get a nice few discounts from your work on days out, or high street shops.
D: Final salary pension, full private healthcare, a company provided Range Rover (you could have chosen Jaguar XJ but it wouldn't get up the lane), and you could probably have a jolly good turn on the boss's eldest daughter without getting into much trouble!
3: What do you think of Aldi?
A: Do all my shopping there cos its cheap innit, dnt like them smug c**ts wot shop at Morrisons.
B: Never go there, full of the type I can't stand, I struggle through and get everything at Tesco!
C: Its got some rather good deals on meat and cheese, not a bad option when you're hosting a party soon as you can stock up cheaply, and they often do some offers on useful household itmes but have to make sure you avoid the riff raff on a Tuesday!
D: It is spelt "Audi" and I think they are the same people who made your Bentley, so you bought an A1 for Emmeline when she turned 17 to learn to drive in.
4: How often do you go to McDonalds, and what do you have when you are there?
A: all the time m8, 8 Happy Meals for the kids and then I'll have a Large Big Mac Meal, plus 20 chicken nuggets, and a Diet Coke so I can watch my calories. Plus I'll go in for breakfast on the way home from getting my dole cheque.
B: You take the kids there one a fortnight on the way home from your parents because you can't be bothered to cook another microwave meal, they'll have a Happy Meal each and you'll just have a quarter pounder.
C: Rarely, if ever, maybe an early morning meal on the way to pick up a new shed, but you'd rather not.
D: Well we visit the McDonalds every year come grouse season, they've got a fantastic spot for the shoot up in Scotland, and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day. You're rather hoping Emmeline will marry their eldest, Jonty, he's running an investment firm now and could rather help you with the tax affairs of your estate.
5. Which airline do you fly with?
A: RyanAir, its all you can afford but you'll moan about it the whole time when something goes wrong even though it was only £2.
B: Monarch, Thomas Cook, EasyJet, whichever one comes with the package really
C: BA, if you can, though any of their codeshare partners, Emirates if you're going East. However, EasyJet aren't too bad these days if you're only doing a short hop over to the continent for a weekend away.
D: Well I'll just call up the airfield and they'll have my jet ready in 4 or 5 hours, where do you want to go? I know this lovely restaurant overlooking the Baltic, you'd have to know where it is though.
6. What's your daily drive?
A: Vauxhall Zafira (as from Q1)
B: You've got an Audi A4 2.0 tdi 140 on a 3 year lease
C: Volvo V70 D5 that you picked up for a couple of grand just to get to the station and back and for tip runs, taking the children to ballet and rugby
D: Well Watkins will usually drive you around in the Bentley but you might take that old Subaru that hasn't died yet if you're taking the dogs out somewhere, doesn't matter if it gets muddy in that but it just won't die.
7. Speaking of dogs, what breed do you have and what's his name?
A: Staffie on a chain called Fang, and the missus has got a Pug named after the girl from Frozen.
B: Staffordshire terrier, but he's been brought up well! He's called Khal after Game of Thrones
C: You adopted a labrador and he was already called Percy.
D: A load of Labradors, a collie, though many of them are the children's and you can't remember all their names, but your favourite is your faithful old West Highland Terrier who just follows you around and keeps you company, so you called him Orion after your favourite constellation.
How did you score?
Mostly A: Face it, you only answered A, and you're full on council. Get back on your mobility scooter and go and sit in Ladbrokes for the day wasting your dole money on horse racing instead of spending it on the kids.
Mostly B: As much as you can't admit it, you're painfully close to council-dom and need to shape up a bit.
Mostly C: You're not council.
Mostly D: You often have a drink with the leader of the local council at your club, just trying to get him to sort out that awful bother with the fly tipping on the edge of your estate.
Keep a tally of your scores.
1. You receive a letter from Vauxhall. What does it say?
A: "Dear Dazza. Our records indicate that you have still not arranged with us to have your Vauxhall Zafira returned to us for required recall work as directed to us by your Motability provider. This vehicle might catch fire at any time and despite our repeated letters, telephone calls and nationwide coverage in The Sun newspaper. You will not be able to claim we haven't told you about this.
B: Dear Mr Watkins. We would love to invite you to test drive the new Insignia and VXR Ranges at your local Approved Retailer, call us now to book a session.
C: Its just some marketing junk mail, straight onto the fireplace.
D: You'd rather not say. Its personal correspondance from your MP's London Residency in the borough and if word got out then he could face some rather unpleasant (but of course, unfounded) allegations in the press which would rather harm your mutual assets.
2. What benefits do you get?
A: Disability, cos you got a dodgy eardrum ever since that time you were stood next to an angle grider, you get 8 lots of child benefit for all your brats, you used to get job seekers but them b*stards stopped paying cos u aint had a job for 5 years, so u got to fight back innit next time your at the dole line!
B: Child benefit, for your 2, and the standard workplace pension.
C: Company car allowance which allows you to avoid leasing an Audi A4, better pension options, plus you get a nice few discounts from your work on days out, or high street shops.
D: Final salary pension, full private healthcare, a company provided Range Rover (you could have chosen Jaguar XJ but it wouldn't get up the lane), and you could probably have a jolly good turn on the boss's eldest daughter without getting into much trouble!
3: What do you think of Aldi?
A: Do all my shopping there cos its cheap innit, dnt like them smug c**ts wot shop at Morrisons.
B: Never go there, full of the type I can't stand, I struggle through and get everything at Tesco!
C: Its got some rather good deals on meat and cheese, not a bad option when you're hosting a party soon as you can stock up cheaply, and they often do some offers on useful household itmes but have to make sure you avoid the riff raff on a Tuesday!
D: It is spelt "Audi" and I think they are the same people who made your Bentley, so you bought an A1 for Emmeline when she turned 17 to learn to drive in.
4: How often do you go to McDonalds, and what do you have when you are there?
A: all the time m8, 8 Happy Meals for the kids and then I'll have a Large Big Mac Meal, plus 20 chicken nuggets, and a Diet Coke so I can watch my calories. Plus I'll go in for breakfast on the way home from getting my dole cheque.
B: You take the kids there one a fortnight on the way home from your parents because you can't be bothered to cook another microwave meal, they'll have a Happy Meal each and you'll just have a quarter pounder.
C: Rarely, if ever, maybe an early morning meal on the way to pick up a new shed, but you'd rather not.
D: Well we visit the McDonalds every year come grouse season, they've got a fantastic spot for the shoot up in Scotland, and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day. You're rather hoping Emmeline will marry their eldest, Jonty, he's running an investment firm now and could rather help you with the tax affairs of your estate.
5. Which airline do you fly with?
A: RyanAir, its all you can afford but you'll moan about it the whole time when something goes wrong even though it was only £2.
B: Monarch, Thomas Cook, EasyJet, whichever one comes with the package really
C: BA, if you can, though any of their codeshare partners, Emirates if you're going East. However, EasyJet aren't too bad these days if you're only doing a short hop over to the continent for a weekend away.
D: Well I'll just call up the airfield and they'll have my jet ready in 4 or 5 hours, where do you want to go? I know this lovely restaurant overlooking the Baltic, you'd have to know where it is though.
6. What's your daily drive?
A: Vauxhall Zafira (as from Q1)
B: You've got an Audi A4 2.0 tdi 140 on a 3 year lease
C: Volvo V70 D5 that you picked up for a couple of grand just to get to the station and back and for tip runs, taking the children to ballet and rugby
D: Well Watkins will usually drive you around in the Bentley but you might take that old Subaru that hasn't died yet if you're taking the dogs out somewhere, doesn't matter if it gets muddy in that but it just won't die.
7. Speaking of dogs, what breed do you have and what's his name?
A: Staffie on a chain called Fang, and the missus has got a Pug named after the girl from Frozen.
B: Staffordshire terrier, but he's been brought up well! He's called Khal after Game of Thrones
C: You adopted a labrador and he was already called Percy.
D: A load of Labradors, a collie, though many of them are the children's and you can't remember all their names, but your favourite is your faithful old West Highland Terrier who just follows you around and keeps you company, so you called him Orion after your favourite constellation.
How did you score?
Mostly A: Face it, you only answered A, and you're full on council. Get back on your mobility scooter and go and sit in Ladbrokes for the day wasting your dole money on horse racing instead of spending it on the kids.
Mostly B: As much as you can't admit it, you're painfully close to council-dom and need to shape up a bit.
Mostly C: You're not council.
Mostly D: You often have a drink with the leader of the local council at your club, just trying to get him to sort out that awful bother with the fly tipping on the edge of your estate.
StangGT said:
Shakermaker said:
Its the 2016 "How Council Are You?" Quiz.
and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day.
Surely everyone knows you dont eat game on the day you've shot it?and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day.
StangGT said:
Shakermaker said:
Its the 2016 "How Council Are You?" Quiz.
and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day.
Surely everyone knows you dont eat game on the day you've shot it?and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day.
Shakermaker said:
Its the 2016 "How Council Are You?" Quiz.
Keep a tally of your scores.
1. You receive a letter from Vauxhall. What does it say?
A: "Dear Dazza. Our records indicate that you have still not arranged with us to have your Vauxhall Zafira returned to us for required recall work as directed to us by your Motability provider. This vehicle might catch fire at any time and despite our repeated letters, telephone calls and nationwide coverage in The Sun newspaper. You will not be able to claim we haven't told you about this.
B: Dear Mr Watkins. We would love to invite you to test drive the new Insignia and VXR Ranges at your local Approved Retailer, call us now to book a session.
C: Its just some marketing junk mail, straight onto the fireplace.
D: You'd rather not say. Its personal correspondance from your MP's London Residency in the borough and if word got out then he could face some rather unpleasant (but of course, unfounded) allegations in the press which would rather harm your mutual assets.
2. What benefits do you get?
A: Disability, cos you got a dodgy eardrum ever since that time you were stood next to an angle grider, you get 8 lots of child benefit for all your brats, you used to get job seekers but them b*stards stopped paying cos u aint had a job for 5 years, so u got to fight back innit next time your at the dole line!
B: Child benefit, for your 2, and the standard workplace pension.
C: Company car allowance which allows you to avoid leasing an Audi A4, better pension options, plus you get a nice few discounts from your work on days out, or high street shops.
D: Final salary pension, full private healthcare, a company provided Range Rover (you could have chosen Jaguar XJ but it wouldn't get up the lane), and you could probably have a jolly good turn on the boss's eldest daughter without getting into much trouble!
3: What do you think of Aldi?
A: Do all my shopping there cos its cheap innit, dnt like them smug c**ts wot shop at Morrisons.
B: Never go there, full of the type I can't stand, I struggle through and get everything at Tesco!
C: Its got some rather good deals on meat and cheese, not a bad option when you're hosting a party soon as you can stock up cheaply, and they often do some offers on useful household itmes but have to make sure you avoid the riff raff on a Tuesday!
D: It is spelt "Audi" and I think they are the same people who made your Bentley, so you bought an A1 for Emmeline when she turned 17 to learn to drive in.
4: How often do you go to McDonalds, and what do you have when you are there?
A: all the time m8, 8 Happy Meals for the kids and then I'll have a Large Big Mac Meal, plus 20 chicken nuggets, and a Diet Coke so I can watch my calories. Plus I'll go in for breakfast on the way home from getting my dole cheque.
B: You take the kids there one a fortnight on the way home from your parents because you can't be bothered to cook another microwave meal, they'll have a Happy Meal each and you'll just have a quarter pounder.
C: Rarely, if ever, maybe an early morning meal on the way to pick up a new shed, but you'd rather not.
D: Well we visit the McDonalds every year come grouse season, they've got a fantastic spot for the shoot up in Scotland, and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day. You're rather hoping Emmeline will marry their eldest, Jonty, he's running an investment firm now and could rather help you with the tax affairs of your estate.
5. Which airline do you fly with?
A: RyanAir, its all you can afford but you'll moan about it the whole time when something goes wrong even though it was only £2.
B: Monarch, Thomas Cook, EasyJet, whichever one comes with the package really
C: BA, if you can, though any of their codeshare partners, Emirates if you're going East. However, EasyJet aren't too bad these days if you're only doing a short hop over to the continent for a weekend away.
D: Well I'll just call up the airfield and they'll have my jet ready in 4 or 5 hours, where do you want to go? I know this lovely restaurant overlooking the Baltic, you'd have to know where it is though.
6. What's your daily drive?
A: Vauxhall Zafira (as from Q1)
B: You've got an Audi A4 2.0 tdi 140 on a 3 year lease
C: Volvo V70 D5 that you picked up for a couple of grand just to get to the station and back and for tip runs, taking the children to ballet and rugby
D: Well Watkins will usually drive you around in the Bentley but you might take that old Subaru that hasn't died yet if you're taking the dogs out somewhere, doesn't matter if it gets muddy in that but it just won't die.
7. Speaking of dogs, what breed do you have and what's his name?
A: Staffie on a chain called Fang, and the missus has got a Pug named after the girl from Frozen.
B: Staffordshire terrier, but he's been brought up well! He's called Khal after Game of Thrones
C: You adopted a labrador and he was already called Percy.
D: A load of Labradors, a collie, though many of them are the children's and you can't remember all their names, but your favourite is your faithful old West Highland Terrier who just follows you around and keeps you company, so you called him Orion after your favourite constellation.
How did you score?
Mostly A: Face it, you only answered A, and you're full on council. Get back on your mobility scooter and go and sit in Ladbrokes for the day wasting your dole money on horse racing instead of spending it on the kids.
Mostly B: As much as you can't admit it, you're painfully close to council-dom and need to shape up a bit.
Mostly C: You're not council.
Mostly D: You often have a drink with the leader of the local council at your club, just trying to get him to sort out that awful bother with the fly tipping on the edge of your estate.
Christ almighty, did you write all of that Keep a tally of your scores.
1. You receive a letter from Vauxhall. What does it say?
A: "Dear Dazza. Our records indicate that you have still not arranged with us to have your Vauxhall Zafira returned to us for required recall work as directed to us by your Motability provider. This vehicle might catch fire at any time and despite our repeated letters, telephone calls and nationwide coverage in The Sun newspaper. You will not be able to claim we haven't told you about this.
B: Dear Mr Watkins. We would love to invite you to test drive the new Insignia and VXR Ranges at your local Approved Retailer, call us now to book a session.
C: Its just some marketing junk mail, straight onto the fireplace.
D: You'd rather not say. Its personal correspondance from your MP's London Residency in the borough and if word got out then he could face some rather unpleasant (but of course, unfounded) allegations in the press which would rather harm your mutual assets.
2. What benefits do you get?
A: Disability, cos you got a dodgy eardrum ever since that time you were stood next to an angle grider, you get 8 lots of child benefit for all your brats, you used to get job seekers but them b*stards stopped paying cos u aint had a job for 5 years, so u got to fight back innit next time your at the dole line!
B: Child benefit, for your 2, and the standard workplace pension.
C: Company car allowance which allows you to avoid leasing an Audi A4, better pension options, plus you get a nice few discounts from your work on days out, or high street shops.
D: Final salary pension, full private healthcare, a company provided Range Rover (you could have chosen Jaguar XJ but it wouldn't get up the lane), and you could probably have a jolly good turn on the boss's eldest daughter without getting into much trouble!
3: What do you think of Aldi?
A: Do all my shopping there cos its cheap innit, dnt like them smug c**ts wot shop at Morrisons.
B: Never go there, full of the type I can't stand, I struggle through and get everything at Tesco!
C: Its got some rather good deals on meat and cheese, not a bad option when you're hosting a party soon as you can stock up cheaply, and they often do some offers on useful household itmes but have to make sure you avoid the riff raff on a Tuesday!
D: It is spelt "Audi" and I think they are the same people who made your Bentley, so you bought an A1 for Emmeline when she turned 17 to learn to drive in.
4: How often do you go to McDonalds, and what do you have when you are there?
A: all the time m8, 8 Happy Meals for the kids and then I'll have a Large Big Mac Meal, plus 20 chicken nuggets, and a Diet Coke so I can watch my calories. Plus I'll go in for breakfast on the way home from getting my dole cheque.
B: You take the kids there one a fortnight on the way home from your parents because you can't be bothered to cook another microwave meal, they'll have a Happy Meal each and you'll just have a quarter pounder.
C: Rarely, if ever, maybe an early morning meal on the way to pick up a new shed, but you'd rather not.
D: Well we visit the McDonalds every year come grouse season, they've got a fantastic spot for the shoot up in Scotland, and their cook really knows how to cook a pheasant or a deer, depending what you've gone out for that day. You're rather hoping Emmeline will marry their eldest, Jonty, he's running an investment firm now and could rather help you with the tax affairs of your estate.
5. Which airline do you fly with?
A: RyanAir, its all you can afford but you'll moan about it the whole time when something goes wrong even though it was only £2.
B: Monarch, Thomas Cook, EasyJet, whichever one comes with the package really
C: BA, if you can, though any of their codeshare partners, Emirates if you're going East. However, EasyJet aren't too bad these days if you're only doing a short hop over to the continent for a weekend away.
D: Well I'll just call up the airfield and they'll have my jet ready in 4 or 5 hours, where do you want to go? I know this lovely restaurant overlooking the Baltic, you'd have to know where it is though.
6. What's your daily drive?
A: Vauxhall Zafira (as from Q1)
B: You've got an Audi A4 2.0 tdi 140 on a 3 year lease
C: Volvo V70 D5 that you picked up for a couple of grand just to get to the station and back and for tip runs, taking the children to ballet and rugby
D: Well Watkins will usually drive you around in the Bentley but you might take that old Subaru that hasn't died yet if you're taking the dogs out somewhere, doesn't matter if it gets muddy in that but it just won't die.
7. Speaking of dogs, what breed do you have and what's his name?
A: Staffie on a chain called Fang, and the missus has got a Pug named after the girl from Frozen.
B: Staffordshire terrier, but he's been brought up well! He's called Khal after Game of Thrones
C: You adopted a labrador and he was already called Percy.
D: A load of Labradors, a collie, though many of them are the children's and you can't remember all their names, but your favourite is your faithful old West Highland Terrier who just follows you around and keeps you company, so you called him Orion after your favourite constellation.
How did you score?
Mostly A: Face it, you only answered A, and you're full on council. Get back on your mobility scooter and go and sit in Ladbrokes for the day wasting your dole money on horse racing instead of spending it on the kids.
Mostly B: As much as you can't admit it, you're painfully close to council-dom and need to shape up a bit.
Mostly C: You're not council.
Mostly D: You often have a drink with the leader of the local council at your club, just trying to get him to sort out that awful bother with the fly tipping on the edge of your estate.
I'd disagree with Ryanair being council though, Monarch, Jet2, Thomson, Thomas cook etc are council.
austinsmirk said:
Check out today's daily mail for pictures of the spitting lady doing her glamour model work.
Carla Marinee... 'Moules' to her friends... http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3863910/Sh...
V8mate said:
austinsmirk said:
Check out today's daily mail for pictures of the spitting lady doing her glamour model work.
Carla Marinee... 'Moules' to her friends... http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3863910/Sh...
Also, 'Moules'
Just see this on another forum, Council Gold at it's best.
Car for obese driver
I am very large so driver seating is a problem with most cars I've tried. I have had c-max and kuga on the scheme but I could use more clearance from my front to steering wheel.
I need a boot capable of taking my hoist for loading and unloading a folded bariatric wheelchair - which "just" fits in the Kuga
I have limited budget for advanced payment but expect to save £1000 before my next vehicle (PIP reviews withstanding) is due
Any suggestions?
TY in advance
Fat b
d, Check !
Motorbility. Check !
Everything for nothing culture. Check !
Car for obese driver
I am very large so driver seating is a problem with most cars I've tried. I have had c-max and kuga on the scheme but I could use more clearance from my front to steering wheel.
I need a boot capable of taking my hoist for loading and unloading a folded bariatric wheelchair - which "just" fits in the Kuga
I have limited budget for advanced payment but expect to save £1000 before my next vehicle (PIP reviews withstanding) is due
Any suggestions?
TY in advance
Fat b
d, Check !Motorbility. Check !
Everything for nothing culture. Check !
gus607 said:
Just see this on another forum, Council Gold at it's best.
Car for obese driver
I am very large so driver seating is a problem with most cars I've tried. I have had c-max and kuga on the scheme but I could use more clearance from my front to steering wheel.
I need a boot capable of taking my hoist for loading and unloading a folded bariatric wheelchair - which "just" fits in the Kuga
I have limited budget for advanced payment but expect to save £1000 before my next vehicle (PIP reviews withstanding) is due
Any suggestions?
TY in advance
Fat bd, Check !
Motorbility. Check !
Everything for nothing culture. Check !
Is that spell-check in action? Did it actually type a word that rhymes, but begins with 'G'?Car for obese driver
I am very large so driver seating is a problem with most cars I've tried. I have had c-max and kuga on the scheme but I could use more clearance from my front to steering wheel.
I need a boot capable of taking my hoist for loading and unloading a folded bariatric wheelchair - which "just" fits in the Kuga
I have limited budget for advanced payment but expect to save £1000 before my next vehicle (PIP reviews withstanding) is due
Any suggestions?
TY in advance
Fat b
d, Check !Motorbility. Check !
Everything for nothing culture. Check !
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