Did you barter with caterers at your wedding?
Discussion
tenfour said:
If you ask the proposed caterer to see his unit prices for food etc and the profit margin your caterer has built in, then you'll be able to work from there. If he refuses to give you this, then you have your answer!
Surely if you asked any business you were purchasing from to give you a breakdown of their costs and profit margins you'd 'have your answer' (ie, a refusal)?TEKNOPUG said:
No but then you don't hire a "wedding DJ". The same with suit hire. Anything prefixed with "wedding" is fsir game though.
Maybe. Hence, of course, the need for us to have this thread to guide our lucky groom to be through the myriad of stuff he's going to now face.
OP - Do as much as you can yourself. It might sound easy to say but it means a lot. The week leading up to our wedding, the wife and I spent every evening watching the TV whilst putting together these little card gift boxes in the shape of a bird cage, threading them with ribbon, and filling them with sweets. We could have bought these pre-made but they cost 10x as much. So for the sake of a few frustrating bits of threading, we saved a reasonable sum of money doing that.
Also - you will argue over wedding things. It is inevitable. But keep in mind that you are probably only arguing about something relatively minor (which dessert choice to make, what readings you want in the ceremony etc) but these are definitely of the "first world problem" magnitude and try and see them as such - you are arguing about this minor stuff because thankfully you have nothing major to argue about.
Make sure that the person you are dealing with at the wedding venue knows their stuff, and is organised. They ought to be, and will hopefully have lots of useful insight to the format of the day based on their experience, and will know what works/doesnt work. We had one venue in mind, went to view it, loved it, but the "planner" in charge of the place was the most uninspiring person I have ever met, and whenever I asked a question such as "Ooh, could we put up this" was given a flat "No, we don't allow that" response, when what would have been better was "No, but what about doing this instead?"
shakotan said:
HAGGLE! It's HAGGLE not Barter, unless you offered them 5 goats and a hundredweight of potatoes in return for your wedding.
"He won't haggle!"....[/Life of Brian]
Reading this thread makes me more pleased we got married 16 years ago. We had a civil ceremony in a hotel in Bormuff.
No cars needed.
Nearer the bar, so everyone had drinks on arrival and could go to the bar as soon as the service was done.
We bought our own wine & champagne elsewhere and paid corkage, and the food wasn't a rip off, a far cry, in fact, from the £165 p.p they're now asking for! (URL says it all "bleed"!)
http://miramar-bournemouth.com/wp-content/uploads/...
My FIL paid the bill the morning after on his credit card so he could gain a few thousand airmiles!
EDIT: Thinking back, I ran a tab at the hotel bar, and since the hotel staff were all students, I kept buying them drinks too. In the end I'm sure my bar bill was far less than the student servers racked up on their own drinks alone!
Edited by 5potTurbo on Tuesday 26th July 15:23
We're going through this at the moment and the short answer is yes, I've haggled on most things.
The venue gave us a choice of their suppliers or we could supply our own with a 'kitchen tax'. As it happened, one of their people was excellent and after discussion, explained to us what her margins were, how much the venue takes and so on and we were able to arrive at an agreeable figure.
We just divided our budget into what we were prepared to pay for each element and have been open with the suppliers about this after they've quoted. It's been pretty laid-back to be fair, and I've had nothing but polite negotiations with everyone involved.
In all honesty, I think most people understand that it's the bride's day, and there are loads of things all competing for your cash so trying to accommodate a budget is more likely to win them the business than refusing to bend. There are enough suppliers out there that it's easy enough to say "Appreciate you taking the time to reply but I'm afraid it's more than we can afford so will need to go with an alternative."
The venue gave us a choice of their suppliers or we could supply our own with a 'kitchen tax'. As it happened, one of their people was excellent and after discussion, explained to us what her margins were, how much the venue takes and so on and we were able to arrive at an agreeable figure.
We just divided our budget into what we were prepared to pay for each element and have been open with the suppliers about this after they've quoted. It's been pretty laid-back to be fair, and I've had nothing but polite negotiations with everyone involved.
In all honesty, I think most people understand that it's the bride's day, and there are loads of things all competing for your cash so trying to accommodate a budget is more likely to win them the business than refusing to bend. There are enough suppliers out there that it's easy enough to say "Appreciate you taking the time to reply but I'm afraid it's more than we can afford so will need to go with an alternative."
I forgot to mention the Keighley's wedding.
About 20 years ago Mr Keighley married his intended, all the kids were there too.
However it was a perivate family affair at the registar office in the afternoon.
A morning do was no good as he would miss out on half a days labouring , cash in hand.
Venue, which all regulars were invited to , regulars I hear you say, yes regulars of a back street boozer.
No bar tab or anything like like every one brought their own drinks and would put the odd drink behind the bar for the wedded couple, the landlord supplied a bottle of fizz too. no charge for using a room and the kitchen was open to serve chip butties.
Aww bless each to their own.
Ladies and gents this is a true story, cool I know bro.
About 20 years ago Mr Keighley married his intended, all the kids were there too.
However it was a perivate family affair at the registar office in the afternoon.
A morning do was no good as he would miss out on half a days labouring , cash in hand.
Venue, which all regulars were invited to , regulars I hear you say, yes regulars of a back street boozer.
No bar tab or anything like like every one brought their own drinks and would put the odd drink behind the bar for the wedded couple, the landlord supplied a bottle of fizz too. no charge for using a room and the kitchen was open to serve chip butties.
Aww bless each to their own.
Ladies and gents this is a true story, cool I know bro.
Some caterers (not specifically wedding) do take the piss a bit on pricing. However, having catered numerous and managed venues as well one reason weddings to attract a higher price is staffing. And, depending on the venue they may have to sacrifice business either side of your hire as well. We used to allow a day setup and a day clear down after a wedding meaning lost revenue when compared to non-event business. And, on the catering side, there is normally more prep work and equipment hire needed, plus more staff.
Everything is negotiable as will be using your own caterers (at a cost).
Everything is negotiable as will be using your own caterers (at a cost).
Are the caterer and the venue the same entity? It would be a nit unusual if the venue isn't the caterer, to not give you a choice.
A bit late to change your mind now, unless you want to move venue and lose your deposit.
We booked a venue that had four approved caterers, we struck a deal with the one we liked the most, they were excellent on the day. I walked away from venues with only one caterer (the venue's own) as it was always a case of 'we're fully booked for 2 years ahead, this is the sticker price, take it or leave it'.
Ufton Court was our venue, for those in Bekshire. Nice people and no corkage!
A bit late to change your mind now, unless you want to move venue and lose your deposit.
We booked a venue that had four approved caterers, we struck a deal with the one we liked the most, they were excellent on the day. I walked away from venues with only one caterer (the venue's own) as it was always a case of 'we're fully booked for 2 years ahead, this is the sticker price, take it or leave it'.
Ufton Court was our venue, for those in Bekshire. Nice people and no corkage!
I have no end of clients looking to book wedding car services telling me how they feel ripped off when they mention the magic word 'wedding'. Seems it is a licence for suppliers to rub their hands together and grin. I live and operate in Suffolk, but I know that by extending out to Essex I can double my fee, it comes down to relative earnings within catchments as much as anything else it seems.
I know I was in a different situation (lucky enough to have the wedding at home), but having got married only last week, I can say everything was negotiable. We 'interviewed' three catering companies, and started by giving a rough budget per head and then worked from there by adding or deleting options.
I don't know where you are, but I can certainly recommend someone in the Salisbury area.
I don't know where you are, but I can certainly recommend someone in the Salisbury area.
I went to a wedding fair and just had to walk away from one company when we asked them about the cost of a BBQ for the wedding. "Our normal fee for a BBQ is £48-51 per head, but we can make it more special if you want." That is completely unreasonable for what would have been burgers, sausages and bits of chicken. Some others were a joke as well, I think the best price was about £30 a head. We ended up buying all the stuff ourselves, hired a chef and a couple of waitresses, I made all the salads and hired a catering BBQ. Considering there was steak, chicken breast and pork, plus the usual burgers and sausages, I'd consider about £13 a head all in pretty reasonable.
The bar was the real joke. As we had a marquee in a neighbours field, there was no bar, so we looked online for people that would run it. My wife found one that was advertised at £200, then £3.00 a pint/glass of wine or £1.50 a shot. When they provided a quote, the £200 became £350, the £3.00 became £4.50 and the shots were then £2.50. Also, we had to pay £30 for a glasswasher (not required as it was a horse field, so all glasses had to be plastic, but we still would have had to have paid), a £30 charge for a card machine (although they would be the ones taking less money without the machine) and a couple more £30 charges for things I can't remember. The thing that was a 100% killer though was we were only allowed to serve one alcoholic drink to guests during the day and they were not coming until the evening. We ended up buying in a load of alcohol and soft drinks to the value of what the bar would have cost and let everyone have what they wanted.
The bar was the real joke. As we had a marquee in a neighbours field, there was no bar, so we looked online for people that would run it. My wife found one that was advertised at £200, then £3.00 a pint/glass of wine or £1.50 a shot. When they provided a quote, the £200 became £350, the £3.00 became £4.50 and the shots were then £2.50. Also, we had to pay £30 for a glasswasher (not required as it was a horse field, so all glasses had to be plastic, but we still would have had to have paid), a £30 charge for a card machine (although they would be the ones taking less money without the machine) and a couple more £30 charges for things I can't remember. The thing that was a 100% killer though was we were only allowed to serve one alcoholic drink to guests during the day and they were not coming until the evening. We ended up buying in a load of alcohol and soft drinks to the value of what the bar would have cost and let everyone have what they wanted.
Vandenberg said:
The first few caterers I rang for a wedding quote, I got the mrs to be to ring and ask the same catering for a 50th birthday party, two of them applied a heavy wedding tax the one we choose had the same price for both type of events.
Which did a survey on this a few years ago and got the results you'd expect but I know someone in the hotel trade and he reckons a wedding is wholly different event to a birthday party.Some brides and their mothers will want meeting after meeting and will be incredibly demanding. He tries to meet them before quoting and bases his prices on gut feel, but admits he doesn't always get it right. For a party people just turn up, have a party and go home.
For Saturdays and Bank Holidays they're booked out 2 years anyway. Based on watching Don't Tell the Bride I reckon the best way to get a deal would be to turn up at short notice with a film crew - venue owners etc seem to capitulate almost every time.
OP i'm sure you are aware but the venue will be charging the caterer a significant margin
you have, in effect, chosen a very expensive venue which is actually passing the value through other suppliers.
Like otehrs we chose our own venue but needed to organise everything- however we spent £800 on a booze cruise to France and got 120 people totally pissed. The ffod was 22/head i seem to remember and it was silver service.
The downside was that we had to organise everything ourselves right down to toilet and generator hire.
We spent 8k on the day (including dresses etc), against a quote of £25k for a venue to supply the same food.
you have, in effect, chosen a very expensive venue which is actually passing the value through other suppliers.
Like otehrs we chose our own venue but needed to organise everything- however we spent £800 on a booze cruise to France and got 120 people totally pissed. The ffod was 22/head i seem to remember and it was silver service.
The downside was that we had to organise everything ourselves right down to toilet and generator hire.
We spent 8k on the day (including dresses etc), against a quote of £25k for a venue to supply the same food.
TEKNOPUG said:
We ruled out dedicated wedding venues for this very reason. They either had limited choice if any of caterers - so captured market and can charge want they want - like motorway services. Or they ran the bar but also set the prices - like £4 for a pint. I'm not charging my guests for booze, so the price would have been absurb. Or they said we can provide the drink but wanted to charge £20 a bottle corkage(!)
So we found our own venue and arranged everyting ourselves. Not just to save money but so that we could have exactly what we wanted. We went to a wedding the other week in a stately home neara Sheffield. Nice enough venue but I'd love to know what the caterers were charge. Tomato soup followed by "Chicken on a bed of fondat potato", which was in fact an overcooked chicken breast on, what could only be desribed as a large potato, that had been boiled and then cut into a two inch thick slice. With some cold carrots. I'm be amazed if it cost even £3 per head. Maybe out friends were just tight
We did a similar thing, looked at the cost of "wedding venues" and shuddered. Ended up hiring a Tudor manor house for a week that slept 18 which was enough for close family and served as the main place for people to congregate. Also hired exclusive use of two local B&B's, six rooms each which we let other guests stay in for free for the week. Hog roast on the day and job was jobbed. So we found our own venue and arranged everyting ourselves. Not just to save money but so that we could have exactly what we wanted. We went to a wedding the other week in a stately home neara Sheffield. Nice enough venue but I'd love to know what the caterers were charge. Tomato soup followed by "Chicken on a bed of fondat potato", which was in fact an overcooked chicken breast on, what could only be desribed as a large potato, that had been boiled and then cut into a two inch thick slice. With some cold carrots. I'm be amazed if it cost even £3 per head. Maybe out friends were just tight
Cost for all accommodation was about £6K for the week and a lot of the guests got a free weeks holiday. Seemed better than £10k for an overpriced barn local can to us for 12 hours!
To be fair considering how much extra work (and cost) goes into catering an event there's a reason the meal costs more than you would pay at a Weatherspoons. But I think people struggle to equate the 10 quid for a steak at Weatherspoons, with why they are paying so more for similar (hopefully a lot better) food served in Marquee in field, forgetting all the extra staff, chefs, specialized equipment, generators, setting-up times etc that are required to get a couple of hundred meals all out (and cleared away) at the same time.
Our wedding was relatively hassle-free. During the initial recce, one venue wanted us to have the reception in one room and then move us to another for the evening function, oh, and that'll cost an extra £XXX; we told them to shove it.
When we finally settled on a venue, the hotel manager deserved a knighthood for services to hotel management; there were supposedly fixed prices for various combinations of reception meal and the evening buffet but he was happy to chop and change to suit us. We'd budgeted for a bottle of wine per couple but in the end that was more than was required, so we got a refund on the surplus. Still cost a lot but what the hell, we're worth it!
When we finally settled on a venue, the hotel manager deserved a knighthood for services to hotel management; there were supposedly fixed prices for various combinations of reception meal and the evening buffet but he was happy to chop and change to suit us. We'd budgeted for a bottle of wine per couple but in the end that was more than was required, so we got a refund on the surplus. Still cost a lot but what the hell, we're worth it!
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