Divorcing empty nesters...
Discussion
singlecoil said:
Ari said:
Why live like that? 
Sprogs I expect, that's the usual reason.TheLordJohn said:
At what point in the marriage does everything you don't do get thrown in your face on a daily basis?
I, personally, feel as if I do quite a lot compared to a lot of men.
However, I don't feel the need to remind my wife that I walk our dog every day (usually more than once), done the washing up, put the dishes away, hoovered up, cleaned the rabbits out etc.
If there's ONE thing she's done that day she finds a way to use it against me in a conversation.
Not to mention the two houses we now own, thanks to me.
I keep all this to myself and just take the s
t like the bh that I have become...
This really doesn't sound good. Sometimes I feel the same..... but one of the problems with women is they don't say what they mean. They will say something at a complete tangent to what they mean & still expect us to know what they mean. We obligingly do what they say or try to, then they get more pissed off with us for not addressing what they meant. It's bonkers & I still fall into the trap. We then have a bust up & finally get to what she actually meant or what was really behind what she was saying. It's been a painful & frustrating learning cycle. I, personally, feel as if I do quite a lot compared to a lot of men.
However, I don't feel the need to remind my wife that I walk our dog every day (usually more than once), done the washing up, put the dishes away, hoovered up, cleaned the rabbits out etc.
If there's ONE thing she's done that day she finds a way to use it against me in a conversation.
Not to mention the two houses we now own, thanks to me.
I keep all this to myself and just take the s
t like the bh that I have become... Don't keep it bottled up. If you do you will become emasculated or so angry you'll blow the relationship apart. No matter how hard it will be you both need to talk. The talk will be positive & all will be well or it will be negative & at least you have the answer.
GT03ROB said:
This really doesn't sound good.Sometimes I feel the same..... but one of the problems with women is they don't say what they mean. They will say something at a complete tangent to what they mean & still expect us to know what they mean. We obligingly do what they say or try to, then they get more pissed off with us for not addressing what they meant. It's bonkers & I still fall into the trap. We then have a bust up & finally get to what she actually meant or what was really behind what she was saying. It's been a painful & frustrating learning cycle.
Don't keep it bottled up. If you do you will become emasculated or so angry you'll blow the relationship apart. No matter how hard it will be you both need to talk. The talk will be positive & all will be well or it will be negative & at least you have the answer.
SOME women, certainly. But not all.Don't keep it bottled up. If you do you will become emasculated or so angry you'll blow the relationship apart. No matter how hard it will be you both need to talk. The talk will be positive & all will be well or it will be negative & at least you have the answer.
Problem is, SOME men rate women based entirely on looks. Whilst it's important to be attracted to your 'other half', if that's your sole criteria, you're going to have problems.
Find someone nice looking who isn't barking mad - saves an awful lot of grief.
I walked away from mine as it was a toss up between lose the dream house I was building or lose my sanity.
I think I ended up losing both in reality!
No one else involved, we just drifted apart, I moved out (don't do it gents, thats plan A of their trap, get you out of the house!) I am not a drinker/gambler/abusive etc, just a normal bloke trying to make a decent life for my family at the time.
We verbally agreed finances very early after the split, having been with her for over 16 years, married for 10, 2 kids, I never for one mili second thought she would do the dirty on me. Friends even now say they are still utterly shocked by her post split antics.
She started listening to the stirrers, got bitter and fell for the bull of a greedy self employed solicitor and her gravy train barrister husband.
Next minute I am served with an enforcement notice preventing me finalising the house (she thought if it was undervalued as a result she would end up with 100% of it, finish it herself and sell it, creaming all the profit)
Then its drag me to court time to screw me for the finances. Oh and a series of "Uncle Johns" found on plenty of fish start staying overnight so my daughters tell me.
Told a sorry tale to court about needing a big place for the kids, quit her very well paid job a few weeks before the final hearing and then told the judge she could not get a job anymore, so also would not be able to get a mortgage.
He fell for it hook line and sinker, 70/30 split of all assets in her favour, plus she keeps all the £60k voluntary redundancy, but he also said sell the house unfinished. I don't have a penny as it is all sunk into the house. Been living in my mums spare room since.
Suddenly she decides its then ok for me to go back to the house to finish it so she can cream even more ££££ even though the court order she took out stopping me going within 100 metres of it is still in force.
I had no choice, 30% was going to buy me bugger all at its unfinished value and I cannot get a mortgage either as been full time building it, so got it finished over the next 6 months and on the market it went.
As soon as that happens she then tries to put my eldest (12 years old) into care! so much for looking after my girls for years to come.
I fight that all the way, offer to home my daughter somehow even though I don't have a penny until the house is sold, fine she says but not giving me one penny back in order to be able provide a future home our daughter she is rejecting.
I take it back to court, as soon as a judge agrees to listen and lists a hearing date, she then backs right off letting my daughter come to live with me, tells social services everything is now fine and dandy at home for my girls, easy life for them so they also back right off.
In court the judge says tough luck, her word is not legally binding so wont now change the order and even slaps me with her court costs.
2 weeks later she is straight back trying to put my daughter into care again....
That was 3 days ago.
Never, ever, ever trust any of them. they would even eat their young for a £££££
Today tells me she now wants to take the house off the market !!!!! even though there is a court order to sell it, the place is like a pigsty, as she is actually living in it, clearly trying to put off buyers now.
We had a second viewing this morning, as I turn up and am showing them around the police arrive as my daughter tried to run away this morning as she cannot stand living under the same roof as her mother anymore either, you can imagine what the potential buyers must have thought, and will no doubt run a mile.
Poor kid I know the feeling, I did manage to escape, but there is nothing I can do for her.
I proposed on her 40th birthday whilst on the shores of Lake Como, as she was feeling down over it, and I felt sorry for her, it was a spur of the moment thing on my part, what a sucker I was never, ever again.
Oh and her solicitor monitors my PH threads, they were even quoted in court by them.
I think I ended up losing both in reality!
No one else involved, we just drifted apart, I moved out (don't do it gents, thats plan A of their trap, get you out of the house!) I am not a drinker/gambler/abusive etc, just a normal bloke trying to make a decent life for my family at the time.
We verbally agreed finances very early after the split, having been with her for over 16 years, married for 10, 2 kids, I never for one mili second thought she would do the dirty on me. Friends even now say they are still utterly shocked by her post split antics.
She started listening to the stirrers, got bitter and fell for the bull of a greedy self employed solicitor and her gravy train barrister husband.
Next minute I am served with an enforcement notice preventing me finalising the house (she thought if it was undervalued as a result she would end up with 100% of it, finish it herself and sell it, creaming all the profit)
Then its drag me to court time to screw me for the finances. Oh and a series of "Uncle Johns" found on plenty of fish start staying overnight so my daughters tell me.
Told a sorry tale to court about needing a big place for the kids, quit her very well paid job a few weeks before the final hearing and then told the judge she could not get a job anymore, so also would not be able to get a mortgage.
He fell for it hook line and sinker, 70/30 split of all assets in her favour, plus she keeps all the £60k voluntary redundancy, but he also said sell the house unfinished. I don't have a penny as it is all sunk into the house. Been living in my mums spare room since.
Suddenly she decides its then ok for me to go back to the house to finish it so she can cream even more ££££ even though the court order she took out stopping me going within 100 metres of it is still in force.
I had no choice, 30% was going to buy me bugger all at its unfinished value and I cannot get a mortgage either as been full time building it, so got it finished over the next 6 months and on the market it went.
As soon as that happens she then tries to put my eldest (12 years old) into care! so much for looking after my girls for years to come.
I fight that all the way, offer to home my daughter somehow even though I don't have a penny until the house is sold, fine she says but not giving me one penny back in order to be able provide a future home our daughter she is rejecting.
I take it back to court, as soon as a judge agrees to listen and lists a hearing date, she then backs right off letting my daughter come to live with me, tells social services everything is now fine and dandy at home for my girls, easy life for them so they also back right off.
In court the judge says tough luck, her word is not legally binding so wont now change the order and even slaps me with her court costs.
2 weeks later she is straight back trying to put my daughter into care again....
That was 3 days ago.
Never, ever, ever trust any of them. they would even eat their young for a £££££
Today tells me she now wants to take the house off the market !!!!! even though there is a court order to sell it, the place is like a pigsty, as she is actually living in it, clearly trying to put off buyers now.
We had a second viewing this morning, as I turn up and am showing them around the police arrive as my daughter tried to run away this morning as she cannot stand living under the same roof as her mother anymore either, you can imagine what the potential buyers must have thought, and will no doubt run a mile.
Poor kid I know the feeling, I did manage to escape, but there is nothing I can do for her.
I proposed on her 40th birthday whilst on the shores of Lake Como, as she was feeling down over it, and I felt sorry for her, it was a spur of the moment thing on my part, what a sucker I was never, ever again.
Oh and her solicitor monitors my PH threads, they were even quoted in court by them.
Edited by PAUL500 on Sunday 9th October 21:47
PAUL500 said:
I walked away from mine as it was a toss up between lose the dream house I was building or lose my sanity.
I think I ended up losing both in reality!
No one else involved, we just drifted apart, I moved out (don't do it gents, thats plan A of their trap, get you out of the house!) I am not a drinker/gambler/abusive etc, just a normal bloke trying to make a decent life for my family at the time.
We verbally agreed finances very early after the split, having been with her for over 16 years, married for 10, 2 kids, I never for one mili second thought she would do the dirty on me. Friends even now say they are still utterly shocked by her post split antics.
She started listening to the stirrers, got bitter and fell for the bull of a greedy self employed solicitor and her gravy train barrister husband.
Next minute I am served with an enforcement notice preventing me finalising the house (she thought if it was undervalued as a result she would end up with 100% of it, finish it herself and sell it, creaming all the profit)
Then its drag me to court time to screw me for the finances. Oh and a series of "Uncle Johns" found on plenty of fish start staying overnight so my daughters tell me.
Told a sorry tale to court about needing a big place for the kids, quit her very well paid job a few weeks before the final hearing and then told the judge she could not get a job anymore, so also would not be able to get a mortgage.
He fell for it hook line and sinker, 70/30 split of all assets in her favour, plus she keeps all the £60k voluntary redundancy, but he also said sell the house unfinished. I don't have a penny as it is all sunk into the house. Been living in my mums spare room since.
Suddenly she decides its then ok for me to go back to the house to finish it so she can cream even more ££££ even though the court order she took out stopping me going within 100 metres of it is still in force.
I had no choice, 30% was going to buy me bugger all at its unfinished value and I cannot get a mortgage either as been full time building it, so got it finished over the next 6 months and on the market it went.
As soon as that happens she then tries to put my eldest (12 years old) into care! so much for looking after my girls for years to come.
I fight that all the way, offer to home my daughter somehow even though I don't have a penny until the house is sold, fine she says but not giving me one penny back in order to be able provide a future home our daughter she is rejecting.
I take it back to court, as soon as a judge agrees to listen and lists a hearing date, she then backs right off letting my daughter come to live with me, tells social services everything is now fine and dandy at home for my girls, easy life for them so they also back right off.
In court the judge says tough luck, her word is not legally binding so wont now change the order and even slaps me with her court costs.
2 weeks later she is straight back trying to put my daughter into care again....
That was 3 days ago.
Never, ever, ever trust any of them. they would even eat their young for a £££££
Today tells me she now wants to take the house off the market !!!!! even though there is a court order to sell it, the place is like a pigsty, as she is actually living in it, clearly trying to put off buyers now.
We had a second viewing this morning, as I turn up and am showing them around the police arrive as my daughter tried to run away this morning as she cannot stand living under the same roof as her mother anymore either, you can imagine what the potential buyers must have thought, and will no doubt run a mile.
Poor kid I know the feeling, I did manage to escape, but there is nothing I can do for her.
I proposed on her 40th birthday whilst on the shores of Lake Como, as she was feeling down over it, and I felt sorry for her, it was a spur of the moment thing on my part, what a sucker I was never, ever again.
Oh and her solicitor monitors my PH threads, they were even quoted in court by them.
I hope her solicitor reads that and has the decency to 'review' the case, in the interests of all parties affected.I think I ended up losing both in reality!
No one else involved, we just drifted apart, I moved out (don't do it gents, thats plan A of their trap, get you out of the house!) I am not a drinker/gambler/abusive etc, just a normal bloke trying to make a decent life for my family at the time.
We verbally agreed finances very early after the split, having been with her for over 16 years, married for 10, 2 kids, I never for one mili second thought she would do the dirty on me. Friends even now say they are still utterly shocked by her post split antics.
She started listening to the stirrers, got bitter and fell for the bull of a greedy self employed solicitor and her gravy train barrister husband.
Next minute I am served with an enforcement notice preventing me finalising the house (she thought if it was undervalued as a result she would end up with 100% of it, finish it herself and sell it, creaming all the profit)
Then its drag me to court time to screw me for the finances. Oh and a series of "Uncle Johns" found on plenty of fish start staying overnight so my daughters tell me.
Told a sorry tale to court about needing a big place for the kids, quit her very well paid job a few weeks before the final hearing and then told the judge she could not get a job anymore, so also would not be able to get a mortgage.
He fell for it hook line and sinker, 70/30 split of all assets in her favour, plus she keeps all the £60k voluntary redundancy, but he also said sell the house unfinished. I don't have a penny as it is all sunk into the house. Been living in my mums spare room since.
Suddenly she decides its then ok for me to go back to the house to finish it so she can cream even more ££££ even though the court order she took out stopping me going within 100 metres of it is still in force.
I had no choice, 30% was going to buy me bugger all at its unfinished value and I cannot get a mortgage either as been full time building it, so got it finished over the next 6 months and on the market it went.
As soon as that happens she then tries to put my eldest (12 years old) into care! so much for looking after my girls for years to come.
I fight that all the way, offer to home my daughter somehow even though I don't have a penny until the house is sold, fine she says but not giving me one penny back in order to be able provide a future home our daughter she is rejecting.
I take it back to court, as soon as a judge agrees to listen and lists a hearing date, she then backs right off letting my daughter come to live with me, tells social services everything is now fine and dandy at home for my girls, easy life for them so they also back right off.
In court the judge says tough luck, her word is not legally binding so wont now change the order and even slaps me with her court costs.
2 weeks later she is straight back trying to put my daughter into care again....
That was 3 days ago.
Never, ever, ever trust any of them. they would even eat their young for a £££££
Today tells me she now wants to take the house off the market !!!!! even though there is a court order to sell it, the place is like a pigsty, as she is actually living in it, clearly trying to put off buyers now.
We had a second viewing this morning, as I turn up and am showing them around the police arrive as my daughter tried to run away this morning as she cannot stand living under the same roof as her mother anymore either, you can imagine what the potential buyers must have thought, and will no doubt run a mile.
Poor kid I know the feeling, I did manage to escape, but there is nothing I can do for her.
I proposed on her 40th birthday whilst on the shores of Lake Como, as she was feeling down over it, and I felt sorry for her, it was a spur of the moment thing on my part, what a sucker I was never, ever again.
Oh and her solicitor monitors my PH threads, they were even quoted in court by them.
Edited by PAUL500 on Sunday 9th October 21:47
PAUL500 said:
I walked away from mine as it was a toss up between lose the dream house I was building or lose my sanity.
I think I ended up losing both in reality!
No one else involved, we just drifted apart, I moved out (don't do it gents, thats plan A of their trap, get you out of the house!) I am not a drinker/gambler/abusive etc, just a normal bloke trying to make a decent life for my family at the time.
We verbally agreed finances very early after the split, having been with her for over 16 years, married for 10, 2 kids, I never for one mili second thought she would do the dirty on me. Friends even now say they are still utterly shocked by her post split antics.
She started listening to the stirrers, got bitter and fell for the bull of a greedy self employed solicitor and her gravy train barrister husband.
Next minute I am served with an enforcement notice preventing me finalising the house (she thought if it was undervalued as a result she would end up with 100% of it, finish it herself and sell it, creaming all the profit)
Then its drag me to court time to screw me for the finances. Oh and a series of "Uncle Johns" found on plenty of fish start staying overnight so my daughters tell me.
Told a sorry tale to court about needing a big place for the kids, quit her very well paid job a few weeks before the final hearing and then told the judge she could not get a job anymore, so also would not be able to get a mortgage.
He fell for it hook line and sinker, 70/30 split of all assets in her favour, plus she keeps all the £60k voluntary redundancy, but he also said sell the house unfinished. I don't have a penny as it is all sunk into the house. Been living in my mums spare room since.
Suddenly she decides its then ok for me to go back to the house to finish it so she can cream even more ££££ even though the court order she took out stopping me going within 100 metres of it is still in force.
I had no choice, 30% was going to buy me bugger all at its unfinished value and I cannot get a mortgage either as been full time building it, so got it finished over the next 6 months and on the market it went.
As soon as that happens she then tries to put my eldest (12 years old) into care! so much for looking after my girls for years to come.
I fight that all the way, offer to home my daughter somehow even though I don't have a penny until the house is sold, fine she says but not giving me one penny back in order to be able provide a future home our daughter she is rejecting.
I take it back to court, as soon as a judge agrees to listen and lists a hearing date, she then backs right off letting my daughter come to live with me, tells social services everything is now fine and dandy at home for my girls, easy life for them so they also back right off.
In court the judge says tough luck, her word is not legally binding so wont now change the order and even slaps me with her court costs.
2 weeks later she is straight back trying to put my daughter into care again....
That was 3 days ago.
Never, ever, ever trust any of them. they would even eat their young for a £££££
Today tells me she now wants to take the house off the market !!!!! even though there is a court order to sell it, the place is like a pigsty, as she is actually living in it, clearly trying to put off buyers now.
We had a second viewing this morning, as I turn up and am showing them around the police arrive as my daughter tried to run away this morning as she cannot stand living under the same roof as her mother anymore either, you can imagine what the potential buyers must have thought, and will no doubt run a mile.
Poor kid I know the feeling, I did manage to escape, but there is nothing I can do for her.
I proposed on her 40th birthday whilst on the shores of Lake Como, as she was feeling down over it, and I felt sorry for her, it was a spur of the moment thing on my part, what a sucker I was never, ever again.
Oh and her solicitor monitors my PH threads, they were even quoted in court by them.
Jesus, you have my sympathies. I think I ended up losing both in reality!
No one else involved, we just drifted apart, I moved out (don't do it gents, thats plan A of their trap, get you out of the house!) I am not a drinker/gambler/abusive etc, just a normal bloke trying to make a decent life for my family at the time.
We verbally agreed finances very early after the split, having been with her for over 16 years, married for 10, 2 kids, I never for one mili second thought she would do the dirty on me. Friends even now say they are still utterly shocked by her post split antics.
She started listening to the stirrers, got bitter and fell for the bull of a greedy self employed solicitor and her gravy train barrister husband.
Next minute I am served with an enforcement notice preventing me finalising the house (she thought if it was undervalued as a result she would end up with 100% of it, finish it herself and sell it, creaming all the profit)
Then its drag me to court time to screw me for the finances. Oh and a series of "Uncle Johns" found on plenty of fish start staying overnight so my daughters tell me.
Told a sorry tale to court about needing a big place for the kids, quit her very well paid job a few weeks before the final hearing and then told the judge she could not get a job anymore, so also would not be able to get a mortgage.
He fell for it hook line and sinker, 70/30 split of all assets in her favour, plus she keeps all the £60k voluntary redundancy, but he also said sell the house unfinished. I don't have a penny as it is all sunk into the house. Been living in my mums spare room since.
Suddenly she decides its then ok for me to go back to the house to finish it so she can cream even more ££££ even though the court order she took out stopping me going within 100 metres of it is still in force.
I had no choice, 30% was going to buy me bugger all at its unfinished value and I cannot get a mortgage either as been full time building it, so got it finished over the next 6 months and on the market it went.
As soon as that happens she then tries to put my eldest (12 years old) into care! so much for looking after my girls for years to come.
I fight that all the way, offer to home my daughter somehow even though I don't have a penny until the house is sold, fine she says but not giving me one penny back in order to be able provide a future home our daughter she is rejecting.
I take it back to court, as soon as a judge agrees to listen and lists a hearing date, she then backs right off letting my daughter come to live with me, tells social services everything is now fine and dandy at home for my girls, easy life for them so they also back right off.
In court the judge says tough luck, her word is not legally binding so wont now change the order and even slaps me with her court costs.
2 weeks later she is straight back trying to put my daughter into care again....
That was 3 days ago.
Never, ever, ever trust any of them. they would even eat their young for a £££££
Today tells me she now wants to take the house off the market !!!!! even though there is a court order to sell it, the place is like a pigsty, as she is actually living in it, clearly trying to put off buyers now.
We had a second viewing this morning, as I turn up and am showing them around the police arrive as my daughter tried to run away this morning as she cannot stand living under the same roof as her mother anymore either, you can imagine what the potential buyers must have thought, and will no doubt run a mile.
Poor kid I know the feeling, I did manage to escape, but there is nothing I can do for her.
I proposed on her 40th birthday whilst on the shores of Lake Como, as she was feeling down over it, and I felt sorry for her, it was a spur of the moment thing on my part, what a sucker I was never, ever again.
Oh and her solicitor monitors my PH threads, they were even quoted in court by them.
Edited by PAUL500 on Sunday 9th October 21:47
When we split I did not have a clue about the process, just assumed it was fair and reasonable.
The legal process is a joke, no framework as to how things get awarded fairly. Down to the personal feelings of the judge on the day.
In all we saw about 7 judges, each one had a starkly different viewpoint.
I filled out all the paperwork, provided all the evidence, reams and reams of it, I don't think the judge at the final hearing even opened up the file to read it.
If there had been 10 different judges sat in that room in the final hearing there would have been 10 different verdicts, all in favour of the mother using the children to cream as much £££ as possible.
I left £20k in marital savings when I moved out, first thing she did was spend £5k of it on another boob job, I didn't even want her to have the first one a few years before, she then blew the rest on legal fees but then wanted half of anything I had left in the garage as well.
You provide detailed evidence, it just gets ignored or brushed off, where as they just verbally make things up, not a shred of evidence in support and it even gets listed as true by the judge in his summing up.
Ex said I was running an ebay business not just building my house, what I had been doing was selling off my project car I had been collecting parts for years to restore bit by bit as i simply needed the money to finish the house.
I even provided all my tax returns to prove otherwise, and said to run a business you have to actually buy stock not just sell it, despite all that he said I was salting the money away and it was a business! not one piece of proof, just her claims.
I could tell from the outset he simply did not like me.
I have mentioned this on PH before, but I had jokingly written on a thread here I was going to buy a VC10, her barrister after stalking me on PH told the judge I had not listed it on my assets.
I asked him did he even know what one was, he replied smarmily why not tell us (he did not have a clue), so I did, its a wide body 200 seat jet airliner! the RAF had been scrapping theirs and I had jokingly said on a thread here I might buy one to restore.
The judge wrote it down as an undeclared asset even after that!
Then that is it, no recourse at all, you can appeal but only if anything done was unlawful, but if its simply unfair then tough luck, another judge wont go against his buddies.
After that the wives can do a 100% u turn on anything. Mine stated in court she would never try to put our daughters into care (they have medical issues and I knew she would try to offload them asap once she got what she wanted, I even told the judge that at the time)
Then when she tried to do exactly that, even confirming it by text to me that I knew it was coming years ago, which I presented to court last month, plus documents from social services the judge just said that was then, this is now, she changed her mind, tough, nothing wrong with that! unbelievable.
He even said at the last hearing whats wrong with my daughter living in a house with me worth 30% when he actually awarded my ex 70% in the first place purely on the basis of her claimed need to home them to a certain level for many years to come, and he gave her every penny she asked for as a result.
When I used to see those articles about Fathers for Justice I thought they were just the barmy fringe elements/bad dads/ wasters etc
How wrong was I, now I can see how the poor sods had been pushed to the very limits by their conniving wives.
The legal process is a joke, no framework as to how things get awarded fairly. Down to the personal feelings of the judge on the day.
In all we saw about 7 judges, each one had a starkly different viewpoint.
I filled out all the paperwork, provided all the evidence, reams and reams of it, I don't think the judge at the final hearing even opened up the file to read it.
If there had been 10 different judges sat in that room in the final hearing there would have been 10 different verdicts, all in favour of the mother using the children to cream as much £££ as possible.
I left £20k in marital savings when I moved out, first thing she did was spend £5k of it on another boob job, I didn't even want her to have the first one a few years before, she then blew the rest on legal fees but then wanted half of anything I had left in the garage as well.
You provide detailed evidence, it just gets ignored or brushed off, where as they just verbally make things up, not a shred of evidence in support and it even gets listed as true by the judge in his summing up.
Ex said I was running an ebay business not just building my house, what I had been doing was selling off my project car I had been collecting parts for years to restore bit by bit as i simply needed the money to finish the house.
I even provided all my tax returns to prove otherwise, and said to run a business you have to actually buy stock not just sell it, despite all that he said I was salting the money away and it was a business! not one piece of proof, just her claims.
I could tell from the outset he simply did not like me.
I have mentioned this on PH before, but I had jokingly written on a thread here I was going to buy a VC10, her barrister after stalking me on PH told the judge I had not listed it on my assets.
I asked him did he even know what one was, he replied smarmily why not tell us (he did not have a clue), so I did, its a wide body 200 seat jet airliner! the RAF had been scrapping theirs and I had jokingly said on a thread here I might buy one to restore.
The judge wrote it down as an undeclared asset even after that!
Then that is it, no recourse at all, you can appeal but only if anything done was unlawful, but if its simply unfair then tough luck, another judge wont go against his buddies.
After that the wives can do a 100% u turn on anything. Mine stated in court she would never try to put our daughters into care (they have medical issues and I knew she would try to offload them asap once she got what she wanted, I even told the judge that at the time)
Then when she tried to do exactly that, even confirming it by text to me that I knew it was coming years ago, which I presented to court last month, plus documents from social services the judge just said that was then, this is now, she changed her mind, tough, nothing wrong with that! unbelievable.
He even said at the last hearing whats wrong with my daughter living in a house with me worth 30% when he actually awarded my ex 70% in the first place purely on the basis of her claimed need to home them to a certain level for many years to come, and he gave her every penny she asked for as a result.
When I used to see those articles about Fathers for Justice I thought they were just the barmy fringe elements/bad dads/ wasters etc
How wrong was I, now I can see how the poor sods had been pushed to the very limits by their conniving wives.
desolate said:
TheLordJohn said:
ZOLLAR said:
We're not married but it is on the cards
Honestly, as nice as I can put this, just don't bother. It'll be the biggest mistake of your life.
When you sign the marriage papers you are getting into a contract that has no benefits for you but guarantees the woman is set for life. It is a contract that will always be waiting to bite you on the ass when you least expect it.
PAUL500 said:
I have mentioned this on PH before, but I had jokingly written on a thread here I was going to buy a VC10, her barrister after stalking me on PH told the judge I had not listed it on my assets.
I asked him did he even know what one was, he replied smarmily why not tell us (he did not have a clue), so I did, its a wide body 200 seat jet airliner! the RAF had been scrapping theirs and I had jokingly said on a thread here I might buy one to restore.
The judge wrote it down as an undeclared asset even after that.
Wow, fI asked him did he even know what one was, he replied smarmily why not tell us (he did not have a clue), so I did, its a wide body 200 seat jet airliner! the RAF had been scrapping theirs and I had jokingly said on a thread here I might buy one to restore.
The judge wrote it down as an undeclared asset even after that.
king hell.BlackLabel said:
PAUL500 said:
I have mentioned this on PH before, but I had jokingly written on a thread here I was going to buy a VC10, her barrister after stalking me on PH told the judge I had not listed it on my assets.
I asked him did he even know what one was, he replied smarmily why not tell us (he did not have a clue), so I did, its a wide body 200 seat jet airliner! the RAF had been scrapping theirs and I had jokingly said on a thread here I might buy one to restore.
The judge wrote it down as an undeclared asset even after that.
Wow, fI asked him did he even know what one was, he replied smarmily why not tell us (he did not have a clue), so I did, its a wide body 200 seat jet airliner! the RAF had been scrapping theirs and I had jokingly said on a thread here I might buy one to restore.
The judge wrote it down as an undeclared asset even after that.
king hell.I've been through courts in relation to my kids and can attest to the courts just listening to what ever bulls
t the mother says and taking it as gospel.Amen - 100% spot on.
Their genes are exactly the same as a Black Widow Spider.
I did not mention mediation,
My solicitor said you have to go, the judge will come down heavy on you if you dont.
So I arrange it, meet and chat with them first, nice people, they ask me who is representing my wife, when I tell them they roll their eyes and say don't waste your time, that combination of solicitor and barrister is well known, they always push it to a full final hearing to make the maximum amount of fees.
Exactly as predicted my ex even refuses to reply to the mediators letter, never mind meet them.
Next session in court, the judge is notified of this.
He just shrugs his shoulders, says she does not have to go if she does not want to, and punts it down the line to the next stage with yet another judge without a care!
Now if I had done that.......mind you they could not have screwed me over much more regardless, and now my daughter is in the firing line.
Social Services are pushing to take her in again now and dump her on any old foster carer. My ex does not give a monkeys, even told me yesterday on the doorstep she wanted my girl out of the house asap.
It'll be the biggest mistake of your life.Just because you have got yourself in a state doesn't mean it will be the same for everyone else.That is what every man thinks, that his perfect little snowflake would never do that to him and that is clearly the other men's fault their wives did this to them. Trust me, you do not truly know the woman you married until it comes to divorce time. Then you will not believe what she is capable of and how the person you married was just an illusion of her true personality.
When you sign the marriage papers you are getting into a contract that has no benefits for you but guarantees the woman is set for life. It is a contract that will always be waiting to bite you on the ass when you least expect it.
Their genes are exactly the same as a Black Widow Spider.
I did not mention mediation,
My solicitor said you have to go, the judge will come down heavy on you if you dont.
So I arrange it, meet and chat with them first, nice people, they ask me who is representing my wife, when I tell them they roll their eyes and say don't waste your time, that combination of solicitor and barrister is well known, they always push it to a full final hearing to make the maximum amount of fees.
Exactly as predicted my ex even refuses to reply to the mediators letter, never mind meet them.
Next session in court, the judge is notified of this.
He just shrugs his shoulders, says she does not have to go if she does not want to, and punts it down the line to the next stage with yet another judge without a care!
Now if I had done that.......mind you they could not have screwed me over much more regardless, and now my daughter is in the firing line.
Social Services are pushing to take her in again now and dump her on any old foster carer. My ex does not give a monkeys, even told me yesterday on the doorstep she wanted my girl out of the house asap.
Joey Deacon said:
desolate said:
TheLordJohn said:
ZOLLAR said:
We're not married but it is on the cards
Honestly, as nice as I can put this, just don't bother. It'll be the biggest mistake of your life.
When you sign the marriage papers you are getting into a contract that has no benefits for you but guarantees the woman is set for life. It is a contract that will always be waiting to bite you on the ass when you least expect it.
Edited by PAUL500 on Monday 10th October 08:56
Any bloke who likes sex and hasn't had a vasectomy is at putting himself at risk of ending up like many of the posters on this thread. Whether that happens or not is down to luck. I've been very lucky, and I had a vasectomy too.
My sympathies to people who find themselves in one of these awful situations. People planning to get married and/or have children should be made to read this thread, then at least they won't be able to say they weren't warned.
My sympathies to people who find themselves in one of these awful situations. People planning to get married and/or have children should be made to read this thread, then at least they won't be able to say they weren't warned.
singlecoil said:
Any bloke who likes sex and hasn't had a vasectomy is at putting himself at risk of ending up like many of the posters on this thread. Whether that happens or not is down to luck.
No, not at all. This thread is heavily contributed to by men who've had messy divorces and so someone who's a little hard of thinking might then assume it's representative of the world as a whole. Of course it's not.
I'm pleased you've had a vasectomy however, yet cannot understand why you felt the need to share the news with us. FYI my children are the biggest joy in my life and one that you will never, ever understand or have and so you cannot comment on it.
singlecoil said:
Any bloke who likes sex and hasn't had a vasectomy is at putting himself at risk of ending up like many of the posters on this thread. Whether that happens or not is down to luck. I've been very lucky, and I had a vasectomy too.
My sympathies to people who find themselves in one of these awful situations. People planning to get married and/or have children should be made to read this thread, then at least they won't be able to say they weren't warned.
Early contender for moron of the week award.My sympathies to people who find themselves in one of these awful situations. People planning to get married and/or have children should be made to read this thread, then at least they won't be able to say they weren't warned.
klmhcp said:
singlecoil said:
Any bloke who likes sex and hasn't had a vasectomy is at putting himself at risk of ending up like many of the posters on this thread. Whether that happens or not is down to luck.
No, not at all. This thread is heavily contributed to by men who've had messy divorces and so someone who's a little hard of thinking might then assume it's representative of the world as a whole. Of course it's not.
I'm pleased you've had a vasectomy however, yet cannot understand why you felt the need to share the news with us. FYI my children are the biggest joy in my life and one that you will never, ever understand or have and so you cannot comment on it.
klmhcp said:
I'm pleased you've had a vasectomy however, yet cannot understand why you felt the need to share the news with us. FYI my children are the biggest joy in my life and one that you will never, ever understand or have and so you cannot comment on it.
Ahh the old "you don't have kids so you can't have an opinion about them" line. I can't sing or play an instrument but I can tell if a band can knock out a good tune. Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff