Anyone post 35 and childless

[Mobile Chicane]

Or that 'back in the day', a three bedroomed house in any blue collared suburb of any town was affordable on one working man's wage.

[Cotty]

Chris7865677 said:

Anyone on here post 35 with no kids? Anyone not want any? I am 46 and childless.

45 and no kids, but don't want them.

[easyhome]

I met my wife when I was 27, she was 44 with a 24yr old daughter and a 11yr old son. I knew back then I didn't want kids of my own but wanted to be with her enough to accept living with the son.

I'm now 42 and have 2 grand-daughters (11 & 13), I don't call them "step" grand-daughters because as far as I'm concerned they ARE my grand-daughters and I couldn't love them any more if they were biologically part of me.

However, the way I feel about them has never made me feel like I want to have my own, too much effort, instead I get to have great times with them, and go home to relax with the Mrs on our own afterwards. :-)

James

[Rawwr]

Mobile Chicane said:

Myself, 50. OH, 35. No plans for children.
We have our lives, and can sleep in of a morning.
Aaaah!

(sorry)

[rbgos]

Never mind - I'm 44, my second wife is pregnant with my fifth child, I'll help make up the numbers for all the childless people / couples!

[trixyD]

Chris7865677 said:

Anyone on here post 35 with no kids? Anyone not want any? I am 46 and childless. Never been married and wouldn't have kids with just anyone. Although I did always want them. No friends in the same boat as me. Everyone has kids. So I have very little in common with people my own age. I do worry about the future though without anyone there when I am old and no chance of ever being a grandparent. How many on here are childless in my age bracket? Did you decide that u never wanted any or did it just not happen?

No you aren't the only one, I'm 35 and I don't have any kids. My situation is slightly different to yours however, as it's not something I've ever been interested in to be honest, as weird as that is for most people to understand. Especially those with kids. I've been single for years, no missus, no kids, no stress, and I've never been happier.

[Pothole]

Martin350 said:

never wanted them from a very young age.

[TheJimi]

Pothole said:

Martin350 said:

never wanted them from a very young age.

Depends on how one defines "a very young age"

I was in my teens when I started to realise that I didn't want kids.

[Ari]

silent ninja said:

I think the vast majority regret it in older age. It's always nice to have others around that care, and even better to experience someone else's achievements and appreciate them more than your own.

Because children always achieve and are always there for their parents in later life...

[Don]

It's "childfree" not "childless"...

[Johnnytheboy]

Ari said:

silent ninja said:

I think the vast majority regret it in older age. It's always nice to have others around that care, and even better to experience someone else's achievements and appreciate them more than your own.

Because children always achieve and are always there for their parents in later life...

I understand that - I'm considering adopting adults later in life.

They can inherit my money but they have to spend a few years doing chores for me and listening to my crazy stories when I'm old first.

[Martin350]

TheJimi said:

Pothole said:

Martin350 said:

never wanted them from a very young age.

Depends on how one defines "a very young age"

I was in my teens when I started to realise that I didn't want kids.

I'd say I was in my early teens (that seems "very young" to me now!) when I first thought that I didn't want kids.
My mind has not changed in the 25+ years since.

[Ari]

Johnnytheboy said:

Ari said:

silent ninja said:

I think the vast majority regret it in older age. It's always nice to have others around that care, and even better to experience someone else's achievements and appreciate them more than your own.

Because children always achieve and are always there for their parents in later life...

I understand that - I'm considering adopting adults later in life.

They can inherit my money but they have to spend a few years doing chores for me and listening to my crazy stories when I'm old first.

I like youtr thinking!

[PurpleTurtle]

I had to ironically laugh about this thread last night, us having a kid who will be two in February.

When I met my wife six years ago we were both keen skiers. On our first date we waxed lyrical about how much we both enjoyed it.
For two years of dating I continued to go skiing with my mates, before we then got married and immediately started trying for a kid.

My ski holidays:

1998 > 2012 - went skiing with my mates, every January without fail, one week in the cheaper part of the season
2013 - me and the missus went, were trying for a kid
2014 - me and the missus went, were trying for a kid, she finally got pregnant up a few months later
2015 - season off due to birth of son
2016 - her Dad was seriously ill, passed away in Feb, a trip for the two of us + son canned at last minute

In the interim, her knees have started playing up, she's seeing a physio and (IMHO) making overly dramatic statements about never being able to ski again.
I still want to go skiing, and yesterday got the invite to go with the lads in January 2017, which I put to her last night.
Cue much protestation about leaving her alone for a week with a 2yo and a full blown guilt trip.

My response: "Look, I'd happily take the three of us, but you're constanly banging on about your knees and not being able to ski. I don't want to miss a third consecutive season, so I'm going. If you'd told me on our first date that having a kid would create this much drama about me doing something you know I love, I'd have got up and walked out of the boozer after the first drink"

Cue a large and a frosty atmosphere this morning!

I've put it to her that as soon as our kid is in school I will a) want to get him on the slopes on a family holiday and b) be having my wallet plundered by the cost of term-time holidays, so have a short window of opportunity to get a couple of last trips with my mates in over the next few years before the whole dynamic changes. Will she listen to reason? Pffft.

Sorry, I know I'm ranting but it helps to vent spleen. I love our son more than anything, and I'm very grateful we had him, but the level of mindgames that sometimes accompany parenthood is not something I anticipated.

[austinsmirk]

funnily enough I used to ski 2-3 times a year for about 15 years. used to sail at other times of the year plus all the summer holidays and lots of adventure holidays- stuff like doing distance walks, like pennine way, or big cycle trips LE JOG and so on. nearly every weekend away in my campervans, cycling, walking, caving and so on: But I did all this in a 20 year period of adulthood.

Kids came along for me at 37- my wife being 28. In all honesty I just don't have the spare cash as I once did to do things like take the children sking (£4000 for a week ?!) and they are still young. I also don't have a yacht anymore ! However I look back and think I packed in 20 years of utter fun. I'm not an adult now, looking back thinking I cannot do this because of a child. yes its an utter pain having my life revolving around Brownies, ballet, swimming but I love how my daughters are growing and developing as part of it all.

I'm happy raising them, having different holidays for now and when they get a bit bigger they can start having proper adventures with me Couldn't imagine not having them. My sister married a much older man, they have no children and I feel sorry for her. of course they have more spare cash than me now, but who cares ?

however, each to their own though, it would be no good if we were all the same.

[Foliage]

Chris7865677 said:

andy-xr said:

You the guy who's still hung up on the ex from 30 years ago arent you?

What gives?

Yes I am. Well remembered

You should watch the tv program perception

[ReallyReallyGood]

PurpleTurtle said:

I've put it to her that as soon as our kid is in school I will a) want to get him on the slopes on a family holiday and b) be having my wallet plundered by the cost of term-time holidays, so have a short window of opportunity to get a couple of last trips with my mates in over the next few years before the whole dynamic changes.

Viewing it from your partner's perspective just for a second, I can see why she would think you demanding to go off on a jolly with your mates while she holds the baby is a bit off.

[Beefmeister]

PurpleTurtle said:

Whaa whaa whaa I can't go skiing with my fwends whaa whaa whaa

Grow up, it's called having responsibilities. My missus goes away with work 4 or 5 times a year for over a week, leaving me to look after the nipper and it's f**king hard work.

Give her a little respect.

[Ari]

PurpleTurtle said:

I still want to go skiing, and yesterday got the invite to go with the lads in January 2017, which I put to her last night.
Cue much protestation about leaving her alone for a week with a 2yo and a full blown guilt trip.

My response: "Look, I'd happily take the three of us, but you're constanly banging on about your knees and not being able to ski. I don't want to miss a third consecutive season, so I'm going. If you'd told me on our first date that having a kid would create this much drama about me doing something you know I love, I'd have got up and walked out of the boozer after the first drink"

Cue a large and a frosty atmosphere this morning!

I've put it to her that as soon as our kid is in school I will a) want to get him on the slopes on a family holiday and b) be having my wallet plundered by the cost of term-time holidays, so have a short window of opportunity to get a couple of last trips with my mates in over the next few years before the whole dynamic changes. Will she listen to reason? Pffft.

Yeah, you're not going skiing.

Better get used to the idea.

[OwenK]

Beefmeister said:

PurpleTurtle said:

Whaa whaa whaa I can't go skiing with my fwends whaa whaa whaa

Grow up, it's called having responsibilities. My missus goes away with work 4 or 5 times a year for over a week, leaving me to look after the nipper and it's f**king hard work.

Give her a little respect.

There's having responsibilities and there's having a life. Bloke has given up a lifelong hobby, something he loves doing, for the past 2 years to keep her happy. Is he never allowed to do it again?

She's a big girl, she can cope.