Small talk at the barbers...

[TheJimi]

Hmm.

I have to remove my hearing aid and my specs.

Conversation isn't generally up to much

[bucksmanuk]

I’m always wary of barber’s small talk...
Aged 7 and sat in the chair having my hair cut, the barber is chop-chopping away with comb and sharp scissors but chatting merrily to my dad sat in the chair some distance away. A joke was told, much hilarity ensued, barber forgot his bearings and walked into the side of my head - scissors first. Blood everywhere. Little Bucksmanuk crying his eyes out. I was never taken there again.
Ever since, I’ve liked my barbers to concentrate on cutting my hair with no inane chit-chat. I’ve never been stabbed since- I would like to continue with this state of affairs.

[Cotty]

Some idiot barber put this sign in his shop because he says people are spending too much time on their phones and not talking to each other. What if they don't want to talk to complete strangers, perhaps they just want a hair cut.

http://metro.co.uk/2016/09/17/barber-wont-install-...

[The Mad Monk]

peterperkins said:

I go to a busy hard working Turkish barber in my town.
(Town name withheld to avoid embarrassment!)

We don't talk that much as he has a great feature window looking out near the mkt place. Suffice to say he stops every couple of minutes to watch as a nice looking lady passes by... I swivel the chair and join in, then we smile and carry on. Works for me.. I don't want to chat about drivel when relaxing in the chair, but we do talk about politics, immigration etc etc occasionally.

He does a good wet cut throat shave as well which I enjoy.

Nowhere near Brandesburton, then?

[ambuletz]

HTP99 said:

I hate having my haircut for two reasons:

• small talk.
• the silence if there is no small talk.

Also

• sitting there wondering if you're going to get your haircut by the guy who normally does your hair.

which barber will get done first? 'Cos you want your regular barbar and not the other guy who's their part time. How many people ahead of me? what if there's someone in the back room that's chummy with one barber that is secretly in the queue? Is that dad who brought his two sons in for a haircut going to be getting one aswell? Who's this guy who just walked in, said hi to both of them then went into the back?

[93DW]

ambuletz said:

Also

• sitting there wondering if you're going to get your haircut by the guy who normally does your hair.

Find out his name then when you're next in the queue if he's not ready say "Im waiting for XXX" Simples.

[KAgantua]

'You forgot these hairs on the back of your neck sir'
'Do you want me to cut your ear hair'?

[soad]

She offered to do my eyebrows once (just why?!), I refused.

I'm only 30-something, ffs!

[wack]

soad said:

My "barber" is a lady. She's always telling me how powerfully built I am, and how I am probably banging tons of hot wimmin.

Makes me feel awesome. She gives me a head massage after the hair cut too.

Next time she says it ask her to lock the door, you're either getting a shag or a trip in a cop car but at least you'll know which rather than all the foreplay

My barber is a lad in his mid 20s, been going there a couple of years, he has loyal customers and a good memory so knows which subjects apply, mostly, cars, rugby or football

when I was 14-15 ALL my class went to the same hairdressers because the girl had massive tits that spent 15 minutes rubbing against you

Edited by wack on Friday 23 September 07:23

[Impasse]

soad said:

She offered to do my eyebrows once (just why?!), I refused.

I'm only 30-something, ffs!

Take the hint, Chewbacca.

[CoolHands]

Mine don't really speak english.

[227bhp]

Cotty said:

Some idiot barber put this sign in his shop because he says people are spending too much time on their phones and not talking to each other. What if they don't want to talk to complete strangers, perhaps they just want a hair cut.

http://metro.co.uk/2016/09/17/barber-wont-install-...

He's got the right idea you miserable old git
Although who needs free wifi to use a phone anyhow?
I got 'Come on, put your phone down' by mine a few weeks ago, I didn't mind it.

Anyhow, to answer a question that wasn't asked, they get told to engage in mild mannered banter as part of their training and to avoid 'difficult' subjects like politics etc.

The part I don't like is when she gets the mirror behind and I'm reminded of how thin i'm getting on the crown

[RC1807]

I usually cut my own hair. Whilst in the UK in July I visited a local barbershop. The lady there was an older Singaporean woman. As I'd visted Singapore a few time on business, we got talking about the best "locals" eateries. Afte 10 minutes she started talking to me about *that* bulding on Orchard Road in Singapore!

She knew a lot....

[LaurasOtherHalf]

soad said:

She offered to do my eyebrows once (just why?!), I refused.

I'm only 30-something, ffs!

I've stopped asking my gents now as they generally are too embarrassed to say yes, if you're looking like an apprentice Dennis Healy I'm cutting the buggers back weather you like it or not.

[ApOrbital]

soad said:

She offered to do my eyebrows once (just why?!), I refused.

I'm only 30-something, ffs!

The lass that cuts my hair does my eyebrows and ears just a trim and a neck massage and uses a hot towel,P;us she is fit.

[ApOrbital]

Oh forgot abput the turkish chap on the market he is very good you get a shave plus he burns away your nose hair and snaps your neck to get rid of stress,but does not break it.

[egor110]

Mine's a ex marine , mad stone roses/charlatans fan.

Always a good laugh , normally not very pc and you often get other ex/serving marines having there hair done.

Lots of interesting photo collages on the walls , mostly involving marines,mortars and desert , plus some signed stone roses t shirts.

[FN2TypeR]

ApOrbital said:

Oh forgot abput the turkish chap on the market he is very good you get a shave plus he burns away your nose hair and snaps your neck to get rid of stress,but does not break it.

There is a Turkish place here in Aberdeen that does a shoulder and neck massage thingy after your hair is cut, it's ace.

I generally use a place that can serve beer though! A bottle of lager whilst I get my mop chopped along with a wee natter, the hair dresser I frequent does a fantastic job of making me look presentable and she is gorgeous too, but her broad Aberdonian accent is quite off putting.

[Shakermaker]

RC1807 said:

I usually cut my own hair. Whilst in the UK in July I visited a local barbershop. The lady there was an older Singaporean woman. As I'd visted Singapore a few time on business, we got talking about the best "locals" eateries. Afte 10 minutes she started talking to me about *that* bulding on Orchard Road in Singapore!

She knew a lot....

It has closed!

Not that I went looking for it last month on my honeymoon, but that particular business has gone under

[TwigtheWonderkid]

It's a well known fact that the reason that this country is in such a mess is because the people who actually know how it should be run are all too busy cutting hair or driving taxis.