Lending Small amount of cash to friends
Discussion
I leant a friends brother a few 20s over a short period of time. He would come into my work with a story about how the bank made an error or was closed or had lost his card. It was comming up to my friends birthday and his brother was in a bad way. We all went karting which i ended up lending the money to my friends brother. In total £100. He died later as a result of drugs which i suspected. Never told my friend i had leant his brother money but i saw it as 1 last good social event he enjoyed having his brother at before the end of his life.
So as an update...
She never rang so I dropped her an email instead and said that I had reconsidered the guarantor route and would consider signing the paperwork for this early to mid January but would need the remaining balance settling this month before I would proceed.
She seems interested and immediately emailed me saying she would sort something out and let me know!
She never rang so I dropped her an email instead and said that I had reconsidered the guarantor route and would consider signing the paperwork for this early to mid January but would need the remaining balance settling this month before I would proceed.
She seems interested and immediately emailed me saying she would sort something out and let me know!
alorotom said:
So as an update...
She never rang so I dropped her an email instead and said that I had reconsidered the guarantor route and would consider signing the paperwork for this early to mid January but would need the remaining balance settling this month before I would proceed.
She seems interested and immediately emailed me saying she would sort something out and let me know!
This is gold, interested to see how it unfolds.She never rang so I dropped her an email instead and said that I had reconsidered the guarantor route and would consider signing the paperwork for this early to mid January but would need the remaining balance settling this month before I would proceed.
She seems interested and immediately emailed me saying she would sort something out and let me know!
What are the odds that "sorting something out" involves borrowing the remaining money from someone else so she can pay you back; and further down the line, that other poor sod also ends up out of pocket/chasing the money and, her thinking you're still going to be a guarantor, she plans to default on the loan. She sounds like someone with zero personal fiscal responsibility/conscience.
alorotom said:
So as an update...
She never rang so I dropped her an email instead and said that I had reconsidered the guarantor route and would consider signing the paperwork for this early to mid January but would need the remaining balance settling this month before I would proceed.
She seems interested and immediately emailed me saying she would sort something out and let me know!
Brilliant! I'll be watching this with interest, it's gonna be good! She never rang so I dropped her an email instead and said that I had reconsidered the guarantor route and would consider signing the paperwork for this early to mid January but would need the remaining balance settling this month before I would proceed.
She seems interested and immediately emailed me saying she would sort something out and let me know!
xRIEx said:
This is gold, interested to see how it unfolds.
What are the odds that "sorting something out" involves borrowing the remaining money from someone else so she can pay you back; and further down the line, that other poor sod also ends up out of pocket/chasing the money and, her thinking you're still going to be a guarantor, she plans to default on the loan.
She sounds like someone with zero personal fiscal responsibility/conscience.
to be honest this is my quandary over this whole thing as I know she will get a loan from somebody else to clear me ... which I know is not my issue and ill be in the clear with her, but is a little deceitful in itself ... had the bridges not been burnt already I would have a massive conscience issue over this, as it is, less so.What are the odds that "sorting something out" involves borrowing the remaining money from someone else so she can pay you back; and further down the line, that other poor sod also ends up out of pocket/chasing the money and, her thinking you're still going to be a guarantor, she plans to default on the loan.
She sounds like someone with zero personal fiscal responsibility/conscience.
As an antidote to all the ar5eholes mentioned in this thread, a good news story...
For various reasons a buddy of mine fell on hard times a few years ago and I ended up paying living and schooling expenses for his wife and daughter (being in Dubai these didn't come cheap), in the final tally he ended up owing me almost £30k
Over the last few years (despite the fact we rarely see each other in person anymore) he has religiously paid me an agreed amount monthly, culminating in a payment last week that concluded the loan.
Whilst I never really had any doubt that he would repay me, it's been very nice to be proved right and lovely that I was able to help a friend at no cost to myself.
For various reasons a buddy of mine fell on hard times a few years ago and I ended up paying living and schooling expenses for his wife and daughter (being in Dubai these didn't come cheap), in the final tally he ended up owing me almost £30k
Over the last few years (despite the fact we rarely see each other in person anymore) he has religiously paid me an agreed amount monthly, culminating in a payment last week that concluded the loan.
Whilst I never really had any doubt that he would repay me, it's been very nice to be proved right and lovely that I was able to help a friend at no cost to myself.
K50 DEL said:
As an antidote to all the ar5eholes mentioned in this thread, a good news story...
For various reasons a buddy of mine fell on hard times a few years ago and I ended up paying living and schooling expenses for his wife and daughter (being in Dubai these didn't come cheap), in the final tally he ended up owing me almost £30k
Over the last few years (despite the fact we rarely see each other in person anymore) he has religiously paid me an agreed amount monthly, culminating in a payment last week that concluded the loan.
Whilst I never really had any doubt that he would repay me, it's been very nice to be proved right and lovely that I was able to help a friend at no cost to myself.
Thats what real mates do - its sad that someone living up to what a friendship should be is celebrated!For various reasons a buddy of mine fell on hard times a few years ago and I ended up paying living and schooling expenses for his wife and daughter (being in Dubai these didn't come cheap), in the final tally he ended up owing me almost £30k
Over the last few years (despite the fact we rarely see each other in person anymore) he has religiously paid me an agreed amount monthly, culminating in a payment last week that concluded the loan.
Whilst I never really had any doubt that he would repay me, it's been very nice to be proved right and lovely that I was able to help a friend at no cost to myself.
PS £30k is not a small amount which makes it all the more impressive!
Sort of a lending cash story..
Shared roof, I arranged to get it sorted, get confirmation from all flats about this, pay the roofer.
Within a week all but one had paid me back, inclusive of someone who was on holiday somewhere warm.
That was 6 months ago, still waiting on the last person, every excuse under the sun.
Shared roof, I arranged to get it sorted, get confirmation from all flats about this, pay the roofer.
Within a week all but one had paid me back, inclusive of someone who was on holiday somewhere warm.
That was 6 months ago, still waiting on the last person, every excuse under the sun.
Peanut Gallery said:
Sort of a lending cash story..
Shared roof, I arranged to get it sorted, get confirmation from all flats about this, pay the roofer.
Within a week all but one had paid me back, inclusive of someone who was on holiday somewhere warm.
That was 6 months ago, still waiting on the last person, every excuse under the sun.
Small claims court their ass.Shared roof, I arranged to get it sorted, get confirmation from all flats about this, pay the roofer.
Within a week all but one had paid me back, inclusive of someone who was on holiday somewhere warm.
That was 6 months ago, still waiting on the last person, every excuse under the sun.
When I was 19 or 20 I wasn't on much money but nevertheless I got by.
A friend of mine ran his own little garage and offered to change my injectors and clutch for me, of course at pre-agreed rates.
I paid for the injectors, and the clutch fitting was to be settled at a later date. Living on the budget as you do, I had aside the £200 quid or whatever it was for him, I said are you about, I will pop over and give it to you (he didn't use PayPal).
No, it's OK, sort it later. A week later some other bits came up and I needed the money so I spent it. I was also quite poor in terms of my ability to manage my money, which I have learnt from quite a lot now.
Nevertheless it ended up in a situation where I couldn't pay him back. It wasn't a loan as such but I did owe him money. I think I paid him £75 one month, then the next when I went to pay him, found out he had blocked me on everything so I couldn't get in touch, and was going round telling people that I was a w@nker. I got a mutual friend to say that I wanted to pay off the remainder, he said he'd rather not have the £100 or whatever than have to talk to me...! His choice.... He was a weird character though, he fell out with a fair few people over the years.
These days I am lucky enough to earn a fair old whack and don't need to borrow money. That being said in the building of my car which is very expensive I do end up in a situation where parts may come to £1200 or so but I can only spare £600 or £700 that month.
I have a good relationship with many people (for example my tuner) and I have always been upfront with money with him. So in the case of previous work totalling £1000 I paid £500 one month and £500 the next month. I think now being a bit older and wiser you learn a thing or two about dealing with people. Being upfront with good communication is key.
I think the addage is that he knows I am good for it.
On the other end, I have never had a problem lending money to friends (up to around £200 in total). They pay me back, may be a week or so late but they let me know so I never have a problem.
I would not want to borrow or lend £thousands from a mate.
After say £1k things can get very out of hand very quickly especially if struggling on a month-by-month basis.
A friend of mine ran his own little garage and offered to change my injectors and clutch for me, of course at pre-agreed rates.
I paid for the injectors, and the clutch fitting was to be settled at a later date. Living on the budget as you do, I had aside the £200 quid or whatever it was for him, I said are you about, I will pop over and give it to you (he didn't use PayPal).
No, it's OK, sort it later. A week later some other bits came up and I needed the money so I spent it. I was also quite poor in terms of my ability to manage my money, which I have learnt from quite a lot now.
Nevertheless it ended up in a situation where I couldn't pay him back. It wasn't a loan as such but I did owe him money. I think I paid him £75 one month, then the next when I went to pay him, found out he had blocked me on everything so I couldn't get in touch, and was going round telling people that I was a w@nker. I got a mutual friend to say that I wanted to pay off the remainder, he said he'd rather not have the £100 or whatever than have to talk to me...! His choice.... He was a weird character though, he fell out with a fair few people over the years.
These days I am lucky enough to earn a fair old whack and don't need to borrow money. That being said in the building of my car which is very expensive I do end up in a situation where parts may come to £1200 or so but I can only spare £600 or £700 that month.
I have a good relationship with many people (for example my tuner) and I have always been upfront with money with him. So in the case of previous work totalling £1000 I paid £500 one month and £500 the next month. I think now being a bit older and wiser you learn a thing or two about dealing with people. Being upfront with good communication is key.
I think the addage is that he knows I am good for it.
On the other end, I have never had a problem lending money to friends (up to around £200 in total). They pay me back, may be a week or so late but they let me know so I never have a problem.
I would not want to borrow or lend £thousands from a mate.
After say £1k things can get very out of hand very quickly especially if struggling on a month-by-month basis.
I admit I haven't read the whole thread but this is my lending policy.
If a friend asks for a loan that is a folding cash amount i.e. Less than £200 if I decide to lend it, and I invariably do, I right off the loan immediately. If I get the money back great.
I have been asked for a loan for several thousand on several occasions. The decision to make the loan is based very much on my opinion of my friends reliability and ability to repay the loan. The obvious example is my best friend who asked for a loan of £10,000 to buy his girlfriend out of their house. I lent the money and he paid me back a year later. I had no doubt he would pay me back.
If a friend asks for a loan that is a folding cash amount i.e. Less than £200 if I decide to lend it, and I invariably do, I right off the loan immediately. If I get the money back great.
I have been asked for a loan for several thousand on several occasions. The decision to make the loan is based very much on my opinion of my friends reliability and ability to repay the loan. The obvious example is my best friend who asked for a loan of £10,000 to buy his girlfriend out of their house. I lent the money and he paid me back a year later. I had no doubt he would pay me back.
Twice.
The first is still a friend. His employer called in the administrators and couldn't pay him. He couldn't pay his rent and wasn't eating so I told him I was sending him the money for the month. I didn't expect to get it back so instead I asked him to fabricate me some parts for a slow-burner project I have on the go. I've got the parts now.
The second was a loan in kind. Guy was the boyfriend of a female friend of mine, and he was skint and had knackered tyres. I loaned him a nice set of alloys with fairly fresh Goodyears on, and he knew I wanted them back. Next thing I hear is that he's dumped my friend, shacked up with some other woman and scrapped his car complete with my wheels. I didn't get the correct response first time so I publicised the facts to a few mutual contacts. He then gets in touch upset that I hadn't asked if he was ok about the breakup and offering money (he'd left my friend with a load of surprise debt too). I told him I cared not for people who think nothing of shirking their financial responsibilities, that my friend needed the money more than me and that it was the f
king principle of it, and finally not to contact me again.
The first is still a friend. His employer called in the administrators and couldn't pay him. He couldn't pay his rent and wasn't eating so I told him I was sending him the money for the month. I didn't expect to get it back so instead I asked him to fabricate me some parts for a slow-burner project I have on the go. I've got the parts now.
The second was a loan in kind. Guy was the boyfriend of a female friend of mine, and he was skint and had knackered tyres. I loaned him a nice set of alloys with fairly fresh Goodyears on, and he knew I wanted them back. Next thing I hear is that he's dumped my friend, shacked up with some other woman and scrapped his car complete with my wheels. I didn't get the correct response first time so I publicised the facts to a few mutual contacts. He then gets in touch upset that I hadn't asked if he was ok about the breakup and offering money (he'd left my friend with a load of surprise debt too). I told him I cared not for people who think nothing of shirking their financial responsibilities, that my friend needed the money more than me and that it was the f
king principle of it, and finally not to contact me again.xjay1337 said:
These days I am lucky enough to earn a fair old whack and don't need to borrow money. That being said in the building of my car which is very expensive I do end up in a situation where parts may come to £1200 or so but I can only spare £600 or £700 that month.
I have a good relationship with many people (for example my tuner) and I have always been upfront with money with him. So in the case of previous work totalling £1000 I paid £500 one month and £500 the next month. I think now being a bit older and wiser you learn a thing or two about dealing with people. Being upfront with good communication is key.
I appreciate your integrity in these matters but it's still an odd concept to me: if I want something but can only afford half now, half in a month, I wait for a month and buy it when I have the cash. If I have to wait 10 months to afford something then I save for 10 months.I have a good relationship with many people (for example my tuner) and I have always been upfront with money with him. So in the case of previous work totalling £1000 I paid £500 one month and £500 the next month. I think now being a bit older and wiser you learn a thing or two about dealing with people. Being upfront with good communication is key.
As it is, in months where I haven't needed to buy something I've saved the money anyway, so for most emergencies and things I think I'm covered.
I'm amazed by the quantities of cash being lent for some of the reasons... If I were that broke I had to go begging for $ to buy for example an essential car I wouldn't want to spend (borrow) a penny more of the money that wasn't mine than I had to. Unless of course I was someone with no intention of repaying, in which case why settle for a sub £1k cheap car when a much sweeter ride costs you no more.
You can tell a lot about what kind of lendee you're facing by asking if thats enough or would they like a little more.
You can tell a lot about what kind of lendee you're facing by asking if thats enough or would they like a little more.
xRIEx said:
I appreciate your integrity in these matters but it's still an odd concept to me: if I want something but can only afford half now, half in a month, I wait for a month and buy it when I have the cash. If I have to wait 10 months to afford something then I save for 10 months.
As it is, in months where I haven't needed to buy something I've saved the money anyway, so for most emergencies and things I think I'm covered.
Ideally you are right.As it is, in months where I haven't needed to buy something I've saved the money anyway, so for most emergencies and things I think I'm covered.
But in my case we are continually developing tuning options for my particular engine of which there are often not opportunities to wait because parts come up quickly, are often sold quickly, and likewise we are in competition with another company to be the first to bring parts and solutions to market.
It's very rare I owe anything for parts. It's usually for time which I ensure is fully covered in due course.
As per my post I have been in a situation where I couldn't pay someone back and lost a "friend", I have learnt from that and will not get into that situation again.
I will repeat think owing money is fine up to a point. I earn over twice national salary now compared to just over minimum, so for me to pay someone £500 or £600 back per month is no problem, I can do that without needing to sacrifice on "living". But for example I would not borrow £5k from someone and promise to pay them it back within 3 months as that is not really doable.
The other thing is that many people do not want to wait for 10 months, for example a lot can happen in 10 months and what you want in January may not be feasible when you eventually come to buy it in October... of course in an ideal world, saving is the best but I think these days more and more people live "month by month" and as such as long as it's affordable within the monthly budget, you just do what you need to.
Mr Gullible here. I have lent a few people varying sums (a few hundred to 10k) and pretty much never got a penny back 
Out of those, one couple I have no further contact with, one ungrateful little st who's never darkening my door again, and a cousin I do keep decent relations with despite being out of pocket by a few grand. With all of them, I console myself with the thoughts that at least I could afford to lose those sums. Despite that, there are still a number of people I would happily "lend" to if they ever needed anything.
Out of those, one couple I have no further contact with, one ungrateful little st who's never darkening my door again, and a cousin I do keep decent relations with despite being out of pocket by a few grand. With all of them, I console myself with the thoughts that at least I could afford to lose those sums. Despite that, there are still a number of people I would happily "lend" to if they ever needed anything. Well within 6hrs of offering to look at the guarantor paperwork on the premise of being paid back in full first I had a message saying the remaining balance will be split into 2 equal amounts and paid on the 23rd then the 30th ... odd I'll grant you but we shall see ... I'm guessing 2 people are going to be out of pocket to make me in the black
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