Lending Small amount of cash to friends
Discussion
I worked with a guy a few years back, got on well and kept in touch over the years talking about cars, work etc. A few weeks back he started messaging me about how he'd just been hit with a huge divorce bill and didn't have any cash to feed the kids and was desperate for a few hundred quid. I was suspicious even though it was totally out of character for him. He did sound very sincere and desperate but I declined, no way was I sending a few hundred quid. After then mulling it over I agreed to send him over £30 just so he could at the very least get some food, if it really was true.
I transferred the cash and he messaged to say thanks.
I messaged him a couple of weeks later to ask how it was going, no reply, surprise surprise.
I then tried again and realised he had probably now blocked me and that calling his mobile just led to a message saying it was now discontinued.
All a bit weird, if he was that desperate for £30 I'd have probably sent it anyway but to come up with a story that is probably a load of toss and then refuse to acknowledge me leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.
He used to always be on the PH classifieds so I wonder if he's reading this now....
I transferred the cash and he messaged to say thanks.
I messaged him a couple of weeks later to ask how it was going, no reply, surprise surprise.
I then tried again and realised he had probably now blocked me and that calling his mobile just led to a message saying it was now discontinued.
All a bit weird, if he was that desperate for £30 I'd have probably sent it anyway but to come up with a story that is probably a load of toss and then refuse to acknowledge me leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.
He used to always be on the PH classifieds so I wonder if he's reading this now....
Robbo 27 said:
My brother in law hadnt worked since leaving school. At 24 he got his dream job, to do with film editing ( he is now a film producer). He had to start work at 6.00 am and had no ca to get to work, came to me and asked for £9000 to buy a new car. I agreed, set up a loan agreement which he signed. He ended up buying a £5000 car secvond hand that was nothing but trouble and hi fi equipment for the rest The car went wrong so often that he couldnt afford the loan repayments - at nil interest.
He ended up telling me he couldnt pay it back - sue me if you want.
I should have done.
He was and is a pillock.
Do you still have any contact with him?He ended up telling me he couldnt pay it back - sue me if you want.
I should have done.
He was and is a pillock.
I did "lend" my brother a couple of hundred quid a couple of years ago when he was going through a rough patch(depression) to help him pay some bills, buy some food etc. He did say that when he is sorted he will pay me back. Still haven't seen a penny of it though he is my brother so I'm not overly worried.
He's a very talented artist and is painting a crash helmet for me. We'll see soon if he tries to charge me for it!
Me and a mate were going on holiday a couple of months ago, found one we wanted, I didn't have my card on me. He paid for it, as soon as I got home I transferred the money to his account. I don't like borrowing money from anyone. Unless I had no other option, I wouldn't borrow anything from anyone.
He's a very talented artist and is painting a crash helmet for me. We'll see soon if he tries to charge me for it!
Me and a mate were going on holiday a couple of months ago, found one we wanted, I didn't have my card on me. He paid for it, as soon as I got home I transferred the money to his account. I don't like borrowing money from anyone. Unless I had no other option, I wouldn't borrow anything from anyone.
I lent a mate £200 last year. He was doing a bit of work for me I needed doing, I knew he was skint, so I paid him for the work he'd done, and then lent him £200 on top. Since then, not a thing back. The shame is, I had alot more work he could have done for me that is in his field which would have earned him plenty more than the £200 he owed me. But now he can go and f
k himself. It's not so much the not being paid back, just this 'head in the sand' attitude and being incapable of actually speaking to me about it. !!!!
ETA - If I was lending money to my brother, or brothers and sisters in law it would be done so on the expectation that I had no timescale on being paid back. But i'm fortunate that they are pretty good bunch.
k himself. It's not so much the not being paid back, just this 'head in the sand' attitude and being incapable of actually speaking to me about it. !!!!ETA - If I was lending money to my brother, or brothers and sisters in law it would be done so on the expectation that I had no timescale on being paid back. But i'm fortunate that they are pretty good bunch.
Edited by bunglesprout on Wednesday 16th November 14:35
bunglesprout said:
... just this 'head in the sand' attitude and being incapable of actually speaking to me about it...
That's the thing isn't it? Why the hell do they make you feel as if you are pestering them for actually wanting your money back.Oh yeah, I forgot. Not only does he (mate) sometimes have £50 for me he then says "It's here if you want to collect it". Oh sure, I really feel like wasting a tenners worth of fuel for £50 so it makes me more out of pocket. Some people eh?
bunglesprout said:
I lent a mate £200 last year. He was doing a bit of work for me I needed doing, I knew he was skint, so I paid him for the work he'd done, and then lent him £200 on top. Since then, not a thing back. The shame is, I had alot more work he could have done for me that is in his field which would have earned him plenty more than the £200 he owed me. But now he can go and fk himself. It's not so much the not being paid back, just this 'head in the sand' attitude and being incapable of actually speaking to me about it. !!!!
ETA - If I was lending money to my brother, or brothers and sisters in law it would be done so on the expectation that I had no timescale on being paid back. But i'm fortunate that they are pretty good bunch.
Agreed - lending to close family is a completely different kettle of fish.k himself. It's not so much the not being paid back, just this 'head in the sand' attitude and being incapable of actually speaking to me about it. !!!!ETA - If I was lending money to my brother, or brothers and sisters in law it would be done so on the expectation that I had no timescale on being paid back. But i'm fortunate that they are pretty good bunch.
Edited by bunglesprout on Wednesday 16th November 14:35
I don't lend money to friends after loosing out on a few hundred to a 'friend' about 5 years ago. I never borrow either as I'm very forgetful and I'd be terrible at paying back.
I'll happily buy a meal or a round of drinks or whatever but never ever lend money.
It's a long story but the only person who I lent money to successfully was my mum. She didnt have the available cash to pay (fraud victim) for a course she needed to do. They wouldn't take credit cards so I just gave her the money. She insisted on paying me back which she did.
I'll happily buy a meal or a round of drinks or whatever but never ever lend money.
It's a long story but the only person who I lent money to successfully was my mum. She didnt have the available cash to pay (fraud victim) for a course she needed to do. They wouldn't take credit cards so I just gave her the money. She insisted on paying me back which she did.
Edited by ashleyman on Wednesday 16th November 14:49
ashleyman said:
I don't lend money to friends. I never borrow either.
I'll happily buy a meal or a round of drinks or whatever but never ever lend money.
It's a long story but the only person who I lent money to successfully was my mum. She didnt have the available cash to pay (fraud victim) for a course she needed to do. They wouldn't take credit cards so I just gave her the money. She insisted on paying me back which she did.
If your own mum doesn't pay you back then you really are not having any luck!I'll happily buy a meal or a round of drinks or whatever but never ever lend money.
It's a long story but the only person who I lent money to successfully was my mum. She didnt have the available cash to pay (fraud victim) for a course she needed to do. They wouldn't take credit cards so I just gave her the money. She insisted on paying me back which she did.
Marty Funkhouser said:
ashleyman said:
I don't lend money to friends. I never borrow either.
I'll happily buy a meal or a round of drinks or whatever but never ever lend money.
It's a long story but the only person who I lent money to successfully was my mum. She didnt have the available cash to pay (fraud victim) for a course she needed to do. They wouldn't take credit cards so I just gave her the money. She insisted on paying me back which she did.
If your own mum doesn't pay you back then you really are not having any luck!I'll happily buy a meal or a round of drinks or whatever but never ever lend money.
It's a long story but the only person who I lent money to successfully was my mum. She didnt have the available cash to pay (fraud victim) for a course she needed to do. They wouldn't take credit cards so I just gave her the money. She insisted on paying me back which she did.
I dont make a habit of it, small <£10 amounts are fine and well and tend to get paid back by me shouting 'You owe me drinks!' at them in the pub, I really dont like lending any more although I have done so once and it actually ended absolutely fine. Had a flatmate who I know was going through some hard times. He lost his job & for whatever reason the dole office had told him to do one. Spotted him a months rent, he paid me back in full over 4 months, he got a job 2 months after the loan, paid me half on his 1st paycheque and the later have on his 2nd.
"Could you lend me twenty quid mate?".
"No, you still owe me that tenner you borrowed a fortnight ago."
"Well, that's why I want to borrow twenty, so I can pay you back the tenner".
"I don't think so, your credit-worthiness seems to have run out. Mate."
"Well, if you want to be like that!" ( Walks off in a huff.... )
"No, you still owe me that tenner you borrowed a fortnight ago."
"Well, that's why I want to borrow twenty, so I can pay you back the tenner".
"I don't think so, your credit-worthiness seems to have run out. Mate."
"Well, if you want to be like that!" ( Walks off in a huff.... )
I don't earn a lot these days so wouldn't be able to lend much out, back in the days when I was more flush I happily lent out to a few good friends who were in a bind.
They always paid back in the agreed manner, bar a few reasonable exceptions.
I'd still do it now for the same people if I could.
They always paid back in the agreed manner, bar a few reasonable exceptions.
I'd still do it now for the same people if I could.
The main lesson I've learned from lending money to friends who didn't pay me back, is that they will always start rationalising away the loan as soon as they have the money. There's always a more pressing need they have which means they can't pay you back, they come under pressure I suspect from their wife ("he can afford it, I've got a family to feed and I want that holiday to wherever"), they then either completely ignore me out of a sense of shame, or they turn me into the for having the temerity to ask for the interest-free loan back. I'm talking about decent amounts on each occasion here not a friendly fiver, but I'm certain the same mental process goes on whatever the sum.
Bottom line...it rarely ends well.
for having the temerity to ask for the interest-free loan back. I'm talking about decent amounts on each occasion here not a friendly fiver, but I'm certain the same mental process goes on whatever the sum.Bottom line...it rarely ends well.
I lent a mate (my best mate I might add) 8k to pay off a loan on a car he bought. Would save him almost 2k. Told him he could pay me back at x£ per month. Got back every penny, and much earlier than planned.
Lent my brother 2k and got back every penny plus some extra.
Lend to the right people seems to be the key.
Lent my brother 2k and got back every penny plus some extra.
Lend to the right people seems to be the key.
AndySheff said:
I lent a mate (my best mate I might add) 8k to pay off a loan on a car he bought. Would save him almost 2k. Told him he could pay me back at x£ per month. Got back every penny, and much earlier than planned.
Lent my brother 2k and got back every penny plus some extra.
Lend to the right people seems to be the key.
You never find out the wrong ones until too late...Lent my brother 2k and got back every penny plus some extra.
Lend to the right people seems to be the key.
This'll sound a tiny bit PH, for which I apologise.
I lent my father £1000 a few years ago and completely forgot about it (Company Director, see, spend my money on Red Bull and sausages, natch).
Imagine my surprise when I spotted an extra grand knocking about. He'd paid it back after about 2 years. Christ knows what he needed it for or why it took him so long to pay it back.
I lent my father £1000 a few years ago and completely forgot about it (Company Director, see, spend my money on Red Bull and sausages, natch).
Imagine my surprise when I spotted an extra grand knocking about. He'd paid it back after about 2 years. Christ knows what he needed it for or why it took him so long to pay it back.
Gassing Station | Finance | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff