Mums have it easy
Discussion
RTB said:
Ask them if they want to return to full time work and offer to stop at home and look after the kids... then you'll get your answer as to how bad it is.
Indeed. I read a report on attempt by one of the Scandinavian countries to make paternity leave work (I believe it was Norway IIRC). The main reason there was so little take up by men was the fact their wives didn't want them to have "their" time off with the baby, they guarded it jealously. I shared looking after my first from birth onwards, as my wife went back to work. I found the whole thing a piece of piss to be honest, including doing the housework, cooking, gardening etc. She obviously wasn't overwhelmed by it as when we had the second she couldn't wait to leave work and become a full time Mam (woman what lunches).
Good thread OP, surprised more PH white knights haven't appeared yet
It's easy to be a s
t mum.
It's equally as easy to be a st accountant, salesperson, gas technician, police officer plasterer, etc etc.
Being a good full-time parent is is hard work, challenging and generally thankless.
Its a false comparison to draw parallels between st mums and hard working professionals.
t mum.It's equally as easy to be a s
t accountant, salesperson, gas technician, police officer plasterer, etc etc.Being a good full-time parent is is hard work, challenging and generally thankless.
Its a false comparison to draw parallels between s
t mums and hard working professionals. I have done some horribly brutal manual jobs that wiped me out completely by bedtime.
I would still prefer to go down the mines than have my brain slowly turned to mush day after agonisingly interminable day chasing plumes of vomit, st and urine while listening to the same show on repeat for 12 solid hours and having stuff thrown at you.
I would still prefer to go down the mines than have my brain slowly turned to mush day after agonisingly interminable day chasing plumes of vomit, s
t and urine while listening to the same show on repeat for 12 solid hours and having stuff thrown at you. DonkeyApple said:
Is 'white knight' one of the new hate terms that have become so popular on PH to define and attack anyone who has a contra view?
I've never heard of it before but lots of hate terms seem to be slinking out of the NPE scumpit these days and polluting the more civilised sub forums.
No it isn't. Internet white knights are people who stand up for females online in an attempt to engage in sexual intercourse with them. I've never heard of it before but lots of hate terms seem to be slinking out of the NPE scumpit these days and polluting the more civilised sub forums.
Legend83 said:
Try having twins! (although it pays dividends when they get to school age)
If it makes you feel better having children only one year apart is harder work than twins. At least with twins you can line them up and shovel the same stuff into them and also use same nappies, same clothes and generally be doing the same things at the same time. And they both sod off to nursery simultaneously. 
DonkeyApple said:
Legend83 said:
Try having twins! (although it pays dividends when they get to school age)
If it makes you feel better having children only one year apart is harder work than twins. At least with twins you can line them up and shovel the same stuff into them and also use same nappies, same clothes and generally be doing the same things at the same time. And they both sod off to nursery simultaneously. DonkeyApple said:
If it makes you feel better having children only one year apart is harder work than twins. At least with twins you can line them up and shovel the same stuff into them and also use same nappies, same clothes and generally be doing the same things at the same time. And they both sod off to nursery simultaneously.
Yes agreed, and we have seen it with out mental friends who have a terrible two year old who likes to injure himself frequently and a 6 month old.BUT, that first 0-12 months with twins was the hardest thing I/we/she has ever done.
Humans always over-praise the most important jobs. It helps ensure the continuation of the species. Soldiers get lavish praise, to encourage them to stand between you and a bullet. Firefighters get lavish praise, to encourage them to pluck you from an inferno. Moms get lavish praise, to encourage them to carry an alien for a year and then cater to its every whim for the next two decades.
Yipper said:
Humans always over-praise the most important jobs. It helps ensure the continuation of the species. Soldiers get lavish praise, to encourage them to stand between you and a bullet. Firefighters get lavish praise, to encourage them to pluck you from an inferno. Moms get lavish praise, to encourage them to carry an alien for a year and then cater to its every whim for the next two decades.
Teachers don't...nor NHS etc. Interesting concept though.
steveatesh said:
Indeed. I read a report on attempt by one of the Scandinavian countries to make paternity leave work (I believe it was Norway IIRC). The main reason there was so little take up by men was the fact their wives didn't want them to have "their" time off with the baby, they guarded it jealously.
I shared looking after my first from birth onwards, as my wife went back to work. I found the whole thing a piece of piss to be honest, including doing the housework, cooking, gardening etc. She obviously wasn't overwhelmed by it as when we had the second she couldn't wait to leave work and become a full time Mam (woman what lunches).
Good thread OP, surprised more PH white knights haven't appeared yet
I've offered on many occasions to jack in work and become a full time dad. I was never taken up on the offer. I shared looking after my first from birth onwards, as my wife went back to work. I found the whole thing a piece of piss to be honest, including doing the housework, cooking, gardening etc. She obviously wasn't overwhelmed by it as when we had the second she couldn't wait to leave work and become a full time Mam (woman what lunches).
Good thread OP, surprised more PH white knights haven't appeared yet
DonkeyApple said:
Is 'white knight' one of the new hate terms that have become so popular on PH to define and attack anyone who has a contra view?
I've never heard of it before but lots of hate terms seem to be slinking out of the NPE scumpit these days and polluting the more civilised sub forums.
PH seems in the last couple of weeks to have hi-jacked it to mean 'anyone who stands up for any woman in any context whatsoever'. I've never heard of it before but lots of hate terms seem to be slinking out of the NPE scumpit these days and polluting the more civilised sub forums.
Edited by Vocal Minority on Tuesday 21st March 16:13
SpeedMattersNot said:
Yipper said:
Humans always over-praise the most important jobs. It helps ensure the continuation of the species. Soldiers get lavish praise, to encourage them to stand between you and a bullet. Firefighters get lavish praise, to encourage them to pluck you from an inferno. Moms get lavish praise, to encourage them to carry an alien for a year and then cater to its every whim for the next two decades.
Teachers don't...nor NHS etc. Interesting concept though.
Doctors get over-praised, to encourage them to fix us. It is why doctors swan around with a God complex.
The simple observational answer is it depends on the parent.
Some make great labours/accountants/check out operators/etc and great parents/cleaner/washerperson/cooks/entertainers/supportive partners.
Some can do some or none of the above well, or at all.
If you love your job, and some are a way of life as much as a job, then it's likely you aren't too shabby at it and therefore, although it can be stressful and hateful at times, you get you st together and go back for more with a smile. If you despise your employment you're not going to be happy (unless it's a temporary part of a bigger picture). Simple.
Same for stay at home parents. One woman's mind numbing 7th read for the last 15 days of 5 twinkle toes is another mans realisation that their child is starting to recognise some of the words and read them.
Personally I'd have loved to have been a stay at home dad to a high flying wife and bringing up the kids. But she'd still have to pay for someone to do the ironing. I don't do ironing except in extreme life or sartorial death situations.
As it is I'm a DINKY and happy as Larry.
Some make great labours/accountants/check out operators/etc and great parents/cleaner/washerperson/cooks/entertainers/supportive partners.
Some can do some or none of the above well, or at all.
If you love your job, and some are a way of life as much as a job, then it's likely you aren't too shabby at it and therefore, although it can be stressful and hateful at times, you get you s
t together and go back for more with a smile. If you despise your employment you're not going to be happy (unless it's a temporary part of a bigger picture). Simple.Same for stay at home parents. One woman's mind numbing 7th read for the last 15 days of 5 twinkle toes is another mans realisation that their child is starting to recognise some of the words and read them.
Personally I'd have loved to have been a stay at home dad to a high flying wife and bringing up the kids. But she'd still have to pay for someone to do the ironing. I don't do ironing except in extreme life or sartorial death situations.
As it is I'm a DINKY and happy as Larry.
Edited by Rude-boy on Tuesday 21st March 16:30
DonkeyApple said:
If it makes you feel better having children only one year apart is harder work than twins. At least with twins you can line them up and shovel the same stuff into them and also use same nappies, same clothes and generally be doing the same things at the same time. And they both sod off to nursery simultaneously.
With kids that have even a one year age gap eventually you'll start treating the older kid as the big brother/sister and giving them more responsibility/freedom, otherwise you'll be holding them back for the younger one, which they will also notice.With twins you can't do that ever or you have forever put down the one you have designated as the younger and thus less favoured child. I'm actively dreading GCSE results day as it'll be petty points scoring over UMS let alone grades with my twins.
We have worked very hard to make sure everything is as balanced as we can for them both, even though they both need different types of support.
I'm not a parent.
So I don't know.
But I imagine that it's not easy.
But again depends on how "interactive" you decide to be with your kid.
To be brutally honest I don't think when they're 6 months old they remember anything anyway, I certainly don't remember putting a star shaped pink plastic thing into a blue round shaped thing.......
Feed them, change them....
So I don't know.
But I imagine that it's not easy.
But again depends on how "interactive" you decide to be with your kid.
To be brutally honest I don't think when they're 6 months old they remember anything anyway, I certainly don't remember putting a star shaped pink plastic thing into a blue round shaped thing.......
Feed them, change them....
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