How many of your wedding guests are still in your life?
Discussion
Interesting thread this. I've been with my partner for 10 years now, not married but it's amazing how relationships change from your 20s to now (41).
I went to a wedding of a friend who was about 25 at the time, I was 35. I remember saying to my other half, 'If he'd have got married in his 30s this wedding would be way smaller'. Cynical but true. I've found from your 20s you have groups of friends and know loads of people. Then seeing friends start families and circumstances change, it's amazing how many are unable to maintain contact and have a normal life (kids, work etc.)
If you'd have asked me in my late 20s would I consider moving away from where I lived, my friends would have been one of the reasons not to. I now live 130 miles from my old house and it's made little difference to that side of things. Now that's a depressing thought! haha
I went to a wedding of a friend who was about 25 at the time, I was 35. I remember saying to my other half, 'If he'd have got married in his 30s this wedding would be way smaller'. Cynical but true. I've found from your 20s you have groups of friends and know loads of people. Then seeing friends start families and circumstances change, it's amazing how many are unable to maintain contact and have a normal life (kids, work etc.)
If you'd have asked me in my late 20s would I consider moving away from where I lived, my friends would have been one of the reasons not to. I now live 130 miles from my old house and it's made little difference to that side of things. Now that's a depressing thought! haha
Married 2015 - thankfully still happy
Apart from dead folk and people who you invite because they are your cousin/ great uncle dipstick but you have only met them say 10 times in your life, I can only think of one person (and their partner) who I no longer see
An old friend from college, did lots of stuff together over the years, however it was always one sided ie me reaching out and organising things / making contact
As I got older and had kids etc I realised i didn’t have enough time for friends who wanted to see me / made an effort let alone those who made no effort
Sad really, they saw me pop my house on the market, knew I’d been unwell with cancer / had a kid etc, no contact
I sent Xmas cards for 3 years but just gave up.
Sure they will pop out the woodwork one day
Apart from dead folk and people who you invite because they are your cousin/ great uncle dipstick but you have only met them say 10 times in your life, I can only think of one person (and their partner) who I no longer see
An old friend from college, did lots of stuff together over the years, however it was always one sided ie me reaching out and organising things / making contact
As I got older and had kids etc I realised i didn’t have enough time for friends who wanted to see me / made an effort let alone those who made no effort
Sad really, they saw me pop my house on the market, knew I’d been unwell with cancer / had a kid etc, no contact
I sent Xmas cards for 3 years but just gave up.
Sure they will pop out the woodwork one day
Glosphil said:
Married in 1969 when nearly 23. 45 guests. Apart from those who have died still in touch with all but 3. Just realised almost half the guests have since died & the 3 'out of touch' could have also died. How depressing.
The old boy next door (in his 90s) always says “it’s a worry when you start going to less and less funeral services”I assure him I will attend his!
Myself and Mrs OH were married in 1993 and still very much together.
Only have the mother in law alive now, my parents and her father are long gone.
All siblings both sides are all well and we speak very often with all of them.
My best man is still my best mate and we do about 8-10 track days a year together. I've known him 46 years now.
Still speak with a good few mates who were at the wedding but some have long since drifted away and dare I say it for the better as they were dicks!
Only have the mother in law alive now, my parents and her father are long gone.
All siblings both sides are all well and we speak very often with all of them.
My best man is still my best mate and we do about 8-10 track days a year together. I've known him 46 years now.
Still speak with a good few mates who were at the wedding but some have long since drifted away and dare I say it for the better as they were dicks!
I see this from both sides. From my wedding, I always look at the group photo that was taken and play the who's 'dead, divorced, in prison' and that number stands at 10 from 60ish so far.
I'm also a wedding photographer, so I see a lot of things from weddings and often think the people I've taken photos of, who's still married, friends with their best man/bridesmaids etc.
I'm also a wedding photographer, so I see a lot of things from weddings and often think the people I've taken photos of, who's still married, friends with their best man/bridesmaids etc.
I got married in 2004 and there were about 100 people there. Out of all the people who were there, the following are the only people I have seen in the last ten years or so.
Ex wife
My parents
My brother and his wife
I see my two uncles (Mother's brothers) and one auntie maybe once every couple of years.
I would say maybe ten are dead and I am not in contact with a single friend or work colleague who I knew at the time. Out of my actual relations, I haven't seen a single relation on my fathers side in ten plus years, seeing them will be a once in a decade occurrence.
Weird how you just lose touch with people who used to be a major part of your life without you realising it is even happening.
Oh well, what a waste of money buying them all dinner that day was!
Ex wife
My parents
My brother and his wife
I see my two uncles (Mother's brothers) and one auntie maybe once every couple of years.
I would say maybe ten are dead and I am not in contact with a single friend or work colleague who I knew at the time. Out of my actual relations, I haven't seen a single relation on my fathers side in ten plus years, seeing them will be a once in a decade occurrence.
Weird how you just lose touch with people who used to be a major part of your life without you realising it is even happening.
Oh well, what a waste of money buying them all dinner that day was!
From our two weddings:
Doing the admin in Vegas - only 4 of us there, me and the wife and her dad and girlfriend at the time who wanted to "see us off", which had nothing to do with the poker tournament going on at the same time. Her dad has left the lady he brought across, and we rarely see him now, if at all. So for this wedding, none of them.
Had a proper do the year later in 2017, invited about 60 people, and it's easier to remember the ones we don't/can't speak to any more:
- Me nan, who sadly passed away last year at 99.
- Wife's brother, who kicked off on half the guests at the wedding and we haven't spoken to since.
- Wife's sister's partner at the time, who we found out was feeding her brother Bolivian Marching Powder through the event. He ran out on the wife's sister 3 weeks after their baby was born 3 years ago, haven't spoken to him since either.
- One chap passed away a couple of years afterwards
Still in touch with the rest of our guests though, which makes me think we got the guest list about right (ish).
Doing the admin in Vegas - only 4 of us there, me and the wife and her dad and girlfriend at the time who wanted to "see us off", which had nothing to do with the poker tournament going on at the same time. Her dad has left the lady he brought across, and we rarely see him now, if at all. So for this wedding, none of them.
Had a proper do the year later in 2017, invited about 60 people, and it's easier to remember the ones we don't/can't speak to any more:
- Me nan, who sadly passed away last year at 99.
- Wife's brother, who kicked off on half the guests at the wedding and we haven't spoken to since.
- Wife's sister's partner at the time, who we found out was feeding her brother Bolivian Marching Powder through the event. He ran out on the wife's sister 3 weeks after their baby was born 3 years ago, haven't spoken to him since either.
- One chap passed away a couple of years afterwards
Still in touch with the rest of our guests though, which makes me think we got the guest list about right (ish).
av185 said:
Monkeylegend said:
None from two weddings, even the two wives are long gone 
Under the patio?The first one I got divorced from in 1981 and have not seen or spoken to since, although she has kept in touch with my sister.
All of the ones that are still alive.
Married in 2009 (24 guests)
Had a birthday last week where they were all there aside from 4 (1 dead, 3 with family commitments)
Have a whatsapp thread for the majority that has been running pretty much since whatsapp was launched and it is active every week.
Aside from family, known most of then for 25+ years.
Married in 2009 (24 guests)
Had a birthday last week where they were all there aside from 4 (1 dead, 3 with family commitments)
Have a whatsapp thread for the majority that has been running pretty much since whatsapp was launched and it is active every week.
Aside from family, known most of then for 25+ years.
ThingsBehindTheSun said:
I got married in 2004 and there were about 100 people there. Out of all the people who were there, the following are the only people I have seen in the last ten years or so.
Ex wife
My parents
My brother and his wife
I see my two uncles (Mother's brothers) and one auntie maybe once every couple of years.
I would say maybe ten are dead and I am not in contact with a single friend or work colleague who I knew at the time. Out of my actual relations, I haven't seen a single relation on my fathers side in ten plus years, seeing them will be a once in a decade occurrence.
Weird how you just lose touch with people who used to be a major part of your life without you realising it is even happening.
Oh well, what a waste of money buying them all dinner that day was!
You are clearly my spirit animal :-)Ex wife
My parents
My brother and his wife
I see my two uncles (Mother's brothers) and one auntie maybe once every couple of years.
I would say maybe ten are dead and I am not in contact with a single friend or work colleague who I knew at the time. Out of my actual relations, I haven't seen a single relation on my fathers side in ten plus years, seeing them will be a once in a decade occurrence.
Weird how you just lose touch with people who used to be a major part of your life without you realising it is even happening.
Oh well, what a waste of money buying them all dinner that day was!
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