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NotDave
20,951 posts
26 months
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McHaggis said: My nuclear option that negates all is,
"You remember your mother told you that you needed a man who could tell you no sometimes? This is one of those occasions..." Oooh that's good... I have wheeled it out on a couple of occasions
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Cotty
24,930 posts
153 months
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McHaggis said: The two most powerful words to surviving marriage and avoiding conflict.
"yes dear"
Non committal, positive, non-conflicting, etc.
Acknowledges that she has said something, doesn't necessarily explicitly commit you to anything.
Just don't tell them. "want a divorse?" "Yes dear"
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McHaggis
7,758 posts
24 months
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Cotty said: "want a divorse?"
"Yes dear" Well, if she asks that question then she has already made up her mind...
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NotDave
20,951 posts
26 months
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McHaggis said: Well, if she asks that question then she has already made up her mind...  Even as a bloke, of you're uttering the words: "is it over?" You know the answer
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Dixie68
3,081 posts
56 months
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Vipers said: Mine will start a conversation about something we discussed last week and she expects me to remember to which conversation her rantings belong to......... And I used to sit down watching telly saying yes now and again totally ignoring what she said, then she cottoned on and now will say "What did I just say?"....... b  ks me thinks  What's even worse with my GF is she'll have a conversation in her head and then ask me a question about it. For instance, we were watching the telly the other night and she suddenly pipes up with; GF: "Flowers is a better idea" Me: "Whut?" GF: "Oh for God's sake! Flowers or a bottle of wine?" Me: "Er..?" It turns out her friend from work has recently moved and she'd been sat there thinking what to give her as a house-warming present.
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karona
872 posts
55 months
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Dixie68 said: What's even worse with my GF is she'll have a conversation in her head and then ask me a question about it. Driving to town yesterday, inconsequential conversation the whole way until we arrive at our normal parking spot, whereupon she slammed the car door and stomped off in an obvious huff. WTF? I asked, "I TOLD YOU I wanted to stop at the supermarket to get chocolates for Karen's birthday!!!" "When, exactly, did you tell me?" "On the dual carriageway" "No, darling, that's when you were telling me about Elaine's new haircut" "Well I'm telling you now, you should have known anyway!" <stomps off>>
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wormburner
6,397 posts
122 months
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Dixie68 said: Vipers said: Mine will start a conversation about something we discussed last week and she expects me to remember to which conversation her rantings belong to......... And I used to sit down watching telly saying yes now and again totally ignoring what she said, then she cottoned on and now will say "What did I just say?"....... b ks me thinks What's even worse with my GF is she'll have a conversation in her head and then ask me a question about it. For instance, we were watching the telly the other night and she suddenly pipes up with; GF: "Flowers is a better idea" Me: "Whut?" GF: "Oh for God's sake! Flowers or a bottle of wine?" Me: "Er..?" It turns out her friend from work has recently moved and she'd been sat there thinking what to give her as a house-warming present. All the time. Drives me mad. If she asks me an unanaswerable question now that has obviously come at the end of some inane chitchat she's been having with herself i roll my head maniacally and stare at her with bulging eyes and a skewed Elvis lip. Doesn't help, but makes me feel i'm at least going down fighting.
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Robbie B
5,344 posts
52 months
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wormburner said: Dixie68 said: Vipers said: Mine will start a conversation about something we discussed last week and she expects me to remember to which conversation her rantings belong to......... And I used to sit down watching telly saying yes now and again totally ignoring what she said, then she cottoned on and now will say "What did I just say?"....... b ks me thinks What's even worse with my GF is she'll have a conversation in her head and then ask me a question about it. For instance, we were watching the telly the other night and she suddenly pipes up with; GF: "Flowers is a better idea" Me: "Whut?" GF: "Oh for God's sake! Flowers or a bottle of wine?" Me: "Er..?" It turns out her friend from work has recently moved and she'd been sat there thinking what to give her as a house-warming present. All the time. Drives me mad. If she asks me an unanaswerable question now that has obviously come at the end of some inane chitchat she's been having with herself i roll my head maniacally and stare at her with bulging eyes and a skewed Elvis lip. Doesn't help, but makes me feel i'm at least going down fighting. This must be true of most women. My girlfriend regularly starts speaking half way through whatever she was thinking. You want to do it back, it's more fun than it sounds. Just blurt stuff out whenever its silent. "but there's no way that llama is ever getting back on the right track."
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Pesty
25,888 posts
125 months
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Pub quiz the other night.
Question 1: what Island was camp x ray on.
Me: Cuba
Her: don't be stupid cuba isnt an island its land locked.
Me:where do you think cuba is?
Her:south america somwhere in the middle.
Question 2: Which south american country has coastline on the pacific and Caribian sea.
Me:Well mexico does I think but that isnt south america so there must be one of those at the top that has coast west and east, it..
Her: interupts how can mexico have a coast on the east thats where america is..
Me:? America is east of mexico? so are you saying california has no coast because mexico is there?
Her: yes
I got her to drawa picture which was amazing. I was taking the piss and my daughter joined in so I got her to draw a picture My good god in heaven what the hell are they teaching these days.
Yeah I may not be the best at geography but christ . I will upload the pic I took on the phone of their drawings.
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IanUAE
1,194 posts
33 months
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The wife has the habit of walking off down the house somewhere (que the jokes about the chain from the kitchedn sink being too long...) and ask the lad or I a question. We just look at each other, strug our shoulders and not say anything. Of course we are supposed to have "understood" what the question was!.
Now today I did the samething on purpose. Yep, paying a visit to the mental thread next!
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Pagey
1,050 posts
103 months
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GF phoned me last night as I was driving home. GF "Your oven isn't working, can you pick a takeaway up" ME "huh! whats wrong with it" GF "The light isn't coming on when I turn it on" Me "Check the isolator switch on the wall next to the coffee machine" GF "its on" ME "ok, is the electronic ignition for the gas hob working?" GF "yes thats ok but the oven light won't come on" ME "silly question, but is it both ovens?" GF "where is the other oven/" Me  I have a range cooker "Err it's a double oven, 1 on each side" GF "oh is that an oven aswell, I didn't know" ME  "yep, its not a fan oven so it will take a bit longer to cook, is that one working?" GF "yes, the light comes on" Me "see you in an hour" I get home and dinner is almost ready, I have a look at the fan oven, switch it on and on comes the red light Me "it's working" GF "The light hasn't come on" ME pointing at the red light "It's on" GF "that one comes on but the light inside doesn't" ME WTF! "Err the light inside is a bulb, it must have blown, that wont stop it cooking" GF "How am I supposed to know that" Me "err because it still gets hot - look feel it" GF "Oh! I didn't think of that, I just thought......." Me 
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RyanDD
64 posts
20 months
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<125>
why didnt that page jump work?
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NotDave
20,951 posts
26 months
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Her: "rambling conversation about her previous employer"
Me: "cool.. Heard from them recently?"
Her: *sigh* hissy fit - "you know I have I yd you the other day I called in and saw xyz and abc and had coffee. God you don't listen...." rant. Whinge. Moan.
Me: "you've never told me this"
Her: "I bloody did! Friday afternoon at my mums"
Me: " I was at work Friday, you were there solo"
Her: "oh. God you don't pay attention"
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altmcneill
1 posts
104 months
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So I'm with the girlfriend at her mothers place. They're deciding what to do for dinner when the girlfriend suggests we simply head off to McDonalds and save the effort. Her mother agrees and we drive off to Maccas.
Her mum is driving and has no idea where the local macccas is so we give her directions etc.
On arriving she pulls into the drive thru and stops at the speaker box. The girl asks 'whats you order please', to which my girlfriends mum replies 'can you please tell me whats on the menu today?'. LOL, we nearly wet ourselves. She'd never been to a McDonalds before.
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Bullett
3,530 posts
53 months
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The Jolly Todger
1,170 posts
49 months
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altmcneill said: So I'm with the girlfriend at her mothers place. They're deciding what to do for dinner when the girlfriend suggests we simply head off to McDonalds and save the effort. Her mother agrees and we drive off to Maccas.
Her mum is driving and has no idea where the local macccas is so we give her directions etc.
On arriving she pulls into the drive thru and stops at the speaker box. The girl asks 'whats you order please', to which my girlfriends mum replies 'can you please tell me whats on the menu today?'. LOL, we nearly wet ourselves. She'd never been to a McDonalds before.
And after eating it presumably she'll never go again?
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R300will
3,613 posts
20 months
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The Jolly Todger said: altmcneill said: So I'm with the girlfriend at her mothers place. They're deciding what to do for dinner when the girlfriend suggests we simply head off to McDonalds and save the effort. Her mother agrees and we drive off to Maccas.
Her mum is driving and has no idea where the local macccas is so we give her directions etc.
On arriving she pulls into the drive thru and stops at the speaker box. The girl asks 'whats you order please', to which my girlfriends mum replies 'can you please tell me whats on the menu today?'. LOL, we nearly wet ourselves. She'd never been to a McDonalds before.
And after eating it presumably she'll never go again? She should be proud of the fact that she's never been amongst those Jeremy Kyle rejects
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Craigyp79
291 posts
52 months
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SWMBO pointing at an advert I'm looking at containing a Boxster;
Her: Am I looking a that right?
Me: What?
Her: Black leather?
Me: Yes, eh?
Her: But, black leather????
Me: Yes, it has black leather seats?
Her: Oh, I thought it meant black leather alloys....
Me: Yeeessssss
In her defense it did read; Black Leather 18 inch alloys but still....
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RyanDD
64 posts
20 months
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just asked my gf the light year question
ya its like millions of years or something isn't it?....
loads of years in one of our years or something.....
its about speed like or something.
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bertie
5,632 posts
153 months
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R300will said: The Jolly Todger said: altmcneill said: So I'm with the girlfriend at her mothers place. They're deciding what to do for dinner when the girlfriend suggests we simply head off to McDonalds and save the effort. Her mother agrees and we drive off to Maccas.
Her mum is driving and has no idea where the local macccas is so we give her directions etc.
On arriving she pulls into the drive thru and stops at the speaker box. The girl asks 'whats you order please', to which my girlfriends mum replies 'can you please tell me whats on the menu today?'. LOL, we nearly wet ourselves. She'd never been to a McDonalds before.
And after eating it presumably she'll never go again? She should be proud of the fact that she's never been amongst those Jeremy Kyle rejects I'm proud to say I still don't know how to order at a McDonalds and I'm 42!
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