Classic from the Mrs!

[KFC]

MrBarry123 said:

I kid you not...

1. "Why are they complaining that we didn't do well in the Eurovision Song Contest? Denmark came second and isn't it in England?"

Suffice to say, Dorling Kindersley will be contacted and a First Atlas purchased shortly.

2. On watching a programme about Richard Branson's life, business etc...

"How did he make all that money from selling pickle? It doesn't even taste nice."

As funny as little anecdotes like this are.... how do you guys cope with living with someone who's borderline retarded

[SpeckledJim]

"What's that pub we liked?...The Shoehorse!"

[DannyScene]

Carthage said:

DannyScene said:

On the phone to my girlfriend last night must be a first for this thread but she isn't a teacher or a company director anyway, she decides to tell me about this new discovery they've made about the centre of the earth or something (she didnt have my full attention) but something caught my attention

Girlfriend says : Anyway they did this experiment right and because no matter where you are in the world your always the same distance from the centre of the earth..

Me : Erm are you sure?

Girlfriend : Yes, for example London and Sydney are equal distances to the centre.

Me : You can't be serious? So someone on sea level and someone ontop of everest are the same distance from the centre of the earth?

Girlfriend : Yes what don't you understand about that!? (Getting irrate)

Me : You know what nevermind just tell me the earth thing for fk sake

I'm still not convinced she gets it..


Not hilarious but my first genuine fail by the mrs!

I'm too kind to say anything about a man being stupid.

Edited by Carthage on Wednesday 14th May 16:42

Edited by Carthage on Wednesday 14th May 16:54

st, what have I said/done/missed??

[Skyedriver]

SpeckledJim said:

10 internet smugpoints for the first person to use the phrase 'oblate spheroid' in the only context it is EVER EVER EVER used.

Not round here you don't

[wolfracesonic]

Skyedriver said:

SpeckledJim said:

10 internet smugpoints for the first person to use the phrase 'oblate spheroid' in the only context it is EVER EVER EVER used.

Not round here you don't

Flattened at the poles apparently

[Monkeythree]

Upon arriving in a Hong Kong hotel room and looking out of the window at the street scene below:

"It's like being in China"

[Monkeythree]

Upon arriving in a Hong Kong hotel room and looking out of the window at the street scene below:

"It's like being in China"

[Oldandslow]

Well, she's not wrong. It's exactly like being in China

[Adenauer]

MIL and Frau Adenauer chatting about Facebook yesterday.


FA. Mum do you like my cover photo?
MIL. No, my eyes are a bit squint.
FA. No, not my profile picture, my cover photo.
MIL. What is it?
FA. It's the earth, taken from the moon.
MIL. When did you go there?

[Asterix]

Adenauer said:

MIL and Frau Adenauer chatting about Facebook yesterday.


FA. Mum do you like my cover photo?
MIL. No, my eyes are a bit squint.
FA. No, not my profile picture, my cover photo.
MIL. What is it?
FA. It's the earth, taken from the moon.
MIL. When did you go there?

Whose the space cadet?

[Adenauer]

Here's the picture in question, bloody good Photographer, my missus is.

[Sump]

KFC said:

MrBarry123 said:

I kid you not...

1. "Why are they complaining that we didn't do well in the Eurovision Song Contest? Denmark came second and isn't it in England?"

Suffice to say, Dorling Kindersley will be contacted and a First Atlas purchased shortly.

2. On watching a programme about Richard Branson's life, business etc...

"How did he make all that money from selling pickle? It doesn't even taste nice."

As funny as little anecdotes like this are.... how do you guys cope with living with someone who's borderline retarded

Lmao

[Foxeh]

Adenauer said:

Here's the picture in question, bloody good Photographer, my missus is.

[Adenauer]

[RizzoTheRat]

Foxeh said:

Fake!


Sorry, mistook this for YouTube for a moment there :-D

[ascayman]

MrBarry123 said:

2. On watching a programme about Richard Branson's life, business etc...

"How did he make all that money from selling pickle? It doesn't even taste nice."

[Vipers]

Watching Master Chef, they are in Barcelonia, then they mention "Spain"

So she says "I thought they were in Barcelonia"

[marshalla]

Vipers said:

Watching Master Chef, they are in Barcelonia, then they mention "Spain"

So she says "I thought they were in Barcelonia"

Where ?

[Vipers]

marshalla said:

Vipers said:

Watching Master Chef, they are in Barcelonia, then they mention "Spain"

So she says "I thought they were in Barcelonia"

Where ?

Barcelona then, picky picky.

[catso]

Recently bought a new, more powerful kettle. The water now boils faster and my Mrs is also convinced that said boiling water is hotter than it was from the old kettle...