Men Gruntin while in the mens room

Men Gruntin while in the mens room

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LotusACBC

Original Poster:

2,591 posts

283 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
Does anyone else notice how whenever your in the mens room and another gentleman is standing at the urinal they make grunting noises, as if its difficult to pee.I noticed all of them are over 40. What the hell is wrong with them? It pisses me off.

Soovy

35,829 posts

270 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
LotusACBC said:
Does anyone else notice how whenever your in the mens room and another gentleman is standing at the urinal they make grunting noises, as if its difficult to pee.I noticed all of them are over 40. What the hell is wrong with them? It pisses me off.
Just you fking wait.

DrTre

12,955 posts

231 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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LotusACBC said:
It pisses me off.
Stand further away.

bazking69

8,620 posts

189 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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Prostate problems.

I remember my boss coming in to the bog one day, standing next to me at the urinals, and making the comment 'I wish I could still piss like that and all in one go'

Legend83

9,947 posts

221 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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Hmm. Agreed.

They also seem to think they have carte blanche to let rip as explosively as possible while in open-topped cubicles.

Have heard sounds that would make monitor lizards cry.

MikeCR

581 posts

224 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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Legend83 said:


Have heard sounds that would make monitor lizards cry.
hehe

Republik

4,525 posts

189 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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It's better than hearing grunting, machine gunning and the odd squeak coming from the cubicle when my boss takes a st.

Dupont666

21,604 posts

191 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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Republik said:
It's better than hearing grunting, machine gunning and the odd squeak coming from the cubicle when my boss takes a st.
You go and listen to your boss?

Republik

4,525 posts

189 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
Dupont666 said:
Republik said:
It's better than hearing grunting, machine gunning and the odd squeak coming from the cubicle when my boss takes a st.
You go and listen to your boss?
Communal toilet, 3 cubicle and 3 urinals. If you're in their using a urinal you can't fail to hear him. I forgot to add the rustling of his newspaper as well.

Dupont666

21,604 posts

191 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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The one I noticed that has happened to some newbies in the past, was one of my boss' used to go out for a few drinks at lunchtime and then comes back, eventually he is gagging for a pee...

seeing a space at the urinal goes unleash what can only classed as a pee the force of a fire hose...

People who know him, clear out as soon as he appears hence only the newbies got it, then 2 unlucky people in the urinals next door get splashed... you know the kind of thing, trousers, hands, shirt and if real unlucky... the face!!

But what do you do as he was using the urinal as per there design and not flinging it around???

Out comes newbie all splashed in bosses pee hehe

(was funny when you were not newbie)

Soovy

35,829 posts

270 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
Republik said:
Dupont666 said:
Republik said:
It's better than hearing grunting, machine gunning and the odd squeak coming from the cubicle when my boss takes a st.
You go and listen to your boss?
Communal toilet, 3 cubicle and 3 urinals. If you're in their using a urinal you can't fail to hear him. I forgot to add the rustling of his newspaper copy of Whitehouse as well.

Marf

22,907 posts

240 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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Legend83 said:
They also seem to think they have carte blanche to let rip as explosively as possible while in open-topped cubicles.
I'm always somewhat surprised when I hear this kind of thing. Its a toilet, you know, the one place where you can fart as loud as you want, and take a massive st without raising eyebrows.


Dupont666

21,604 posts

191 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
Marf said:
Legend83 said:
They also seem to think they have carte blanche to let rip as explosively as possible while in open-topped cubicles.
I'm always somewhat surprised when I hear this kind of thing. Its a toilet, you know, the one place where you can fart as loud as you want, and take a massive st without raising eyebrows.
I always find it fun to lay the first cable of the day at work especially after drinking guiness all night and having the obligitary curry afterwards....

Done it before a t home and made me gag and OH goes for the chemical warface face mask, so might as well do it at work and enjoy it... best thing of all they cant say anything as Im a colleague and they dont know me well enjoy to swear and curse my name after the first drop...

Soovy

35,829 posts

270 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
Dupont666 said:
Marf said:
Legend83 said:
They also seem to think they have carte blanche to let rip as explosively as possible while in open-topped cubicles.
I'm always somewhat surprised when I hear this kind of thing. Its a toilet, you know, the one place where you can fart as loud as you want, and take a massive st without raising eyebrows.
I always find it fun to lay the first cable of the day at work especially after drinking guiness all night and having the obligitary curry afterwards....

Done it before a t home and made me gag and OH goes for the chemical warface face mask, so might as well do it at work and enjoy it... best thing of all they cant say anything as Im a colleague and they dont know me well enjoy to swear and curse my name after the first drop...
The traps in BarCap are quite something on a Friday morning.

AndrewW-G

11,968 posts

216 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
Soovy said:
Dupont666 said:
Marf said:
Legend83 said:
They also seem to think they have carte blanche to let rip as explosively as possible while in open-topped cubicles.
I'm always somewhat surprised when I hear this kind of thing. Its a toilet, you know, the one place where you can fart as loud as you want, and take a massive st without raising eyebrows.
I always find it fun to lay the first cable of the day at work especially after drinking guiness all night and having the obligitary curry afterwards....

Done it before a t home and made me gag and OH goes for the chemical warface face mask, so might as well do it at work and enjoy it... best thing of all they cant say anything as Im a colleague and they dont know me well enjoy to swear and curse my name after the first drop...
The traps in BarCap are quite something on a Friday morning.
At least the maintenece team keep them stocked, Radbroke was terrible for running out of paper in the gents frown

ajcj

798 posts

204 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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I confess to feeling selfconscious when last night's lamb dhansak, chana massala, keema naan and Cobra is struggling its way out and making a lot of fuss while it does, especially when the traps to either side are occupied by chaps who seem to be able to lay one down with barely a splash, but for true embarrassment, you need a hotel room on your first night away with a new cutie.

So lots of charming conversation and civilised behaviour and attention to personal hygiene and nipping outside to fart have paid off, and several months in it's time for a romantic weekend away. The hotel room is in a dead trendy boutique place, and the wall between bedroom and bathroom is frosted glass. All other bathroom walls are tiled for maximum reverb. The door is also glass, and does not seal in any way - half-inch gaps all round. So you are effectively in the same room as the bed, which is where you leave your amour, curled up and warm ("hurry back", she murmurs) on the morning after a nice moroccan meal with plenty of chickpeas, spiced lamb, felafel and so on, plus a couple of bottles of rough red, and whisky to finish. You pace with measured tread to the echo chamber, then hunker down to answer the insistent call from the lower colon.

To begin with, it sounded like a duck being strangled half-underwater, then as if thirty clowns wearing oversize rubber shoes were having a sprinting race over a massive bowl of jelly, then as I desperately applied restrictive pressure, it faded into an anguished squeak like a deflating balloon, then as my muscle control gave out, a series of small escaping explosions escalated into a titanic rasp that echoed for several seconds.

Having done the paperwork, brushed everywhere in the bowl, including the underside of the seat (how in the name of gravity could that have happened?), washed hands, and assumed as nonchalant an expression as I could muster, I strolled back in to find her sitting up, covers drawn protectively up under her chin, eyes like a lemur, asking whether I was ok, and did I need medical attention?

Kind of killed the mood, rather.

Balmoral Green

40,660 posts

247 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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rofl

DrTre

12,955 posts

231 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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rofl

Properly laughing out loud.

rofl

ETA, duck, clowns, underside of seat. Jesus wept...and so am I...
Further ETA that has properly cheered me up. Thank you.

Edited by DrTre on Thursday 12th November 18:52

Scraggles

7,619 posts

223 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
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reminds me of being given onion soup and other nice stuff and strolling to the bogs on the campsite for a well earned dump, when some lass decided NOW is the time for a shag, took a long time to get it all out, but was glad when I did

the lass did not seem to be that impressed...

mickk

28,769 posts

241 months

Thursday 12th November 2009
quotequote all
laugh I feel sorry for the lady
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