Management bulls**t phrases
Discussion
I sat on a train to and from London yesterday and heard the worst b
ks bullst I think I've ever come across.
These people's main reason to be in employment seemed to be to have a meeting about organising an agenda for a meeting of little to no consequence to anyone, other than those who were attending it. It had no point, no outcome, no action, nothing about it changed the world, yet these people were so enamoured with setting up a word document, thrusting exciting office talk words into their conversation with whoever was on the end of the phone and around their table.
Maybe the tts on The Apprentice is actually a reflection of modern office life? I thought it was people who didnt really understand what they were saying, but these people on the train were doing it as well!
When not thrusting in fairly random phrases they seemed to speak to each other in pre-rehearsed Customer Service Trained dialogue. Fake conversations on each side, no points actually being made, just appeasement and some weird passive aggressiveness.
I work in a company who's mantra is Get st Done. They're corporate, sure but there's an environment that everyone respects, all politics are dropped on the way in, anyone bringing any bullst gets called out on it so it doesnt spread. It works for us fairly well, it's OK to question the CEO on what he's actually saying. I think it helps that there are people from different nationalities all speaking English though, any metaphorical cloudy language gets rebuked with a 'what's your point, what do you mean' question fairly quickly.
I think there should be a veto against corporate bullst which typically tends to be from middle level people. The top level dont need to impress anyone, the lower level dont give a fk, it's the middle lot who're jockying for climbing up some ladder they think they need to climb in order to be more successful
ks bullst I think I've ever come across. These people's main reason to be in employment seemed to be to have a meeting about organising an agenda for a meeting of little to no consequence to anyone, other than those who were attending it. It had no point, no outcome, no action, nothing about it changed the world, yet these people were so enamoured with setting up a word document, thrusting exciting office talk words into their conversation with whoever was on the end of the phone and around their table.
Maybe the t
ts on The Apprentice is actually a reflection of modern office life? I thought it was people who didnt really understand what they were saying, but these people on the train were doing it as well! When not thrusting in fairly random phrases they seemed to speak to each other in pre-rehearsed Customer Service Trained dialogue. Fake conversations on each side, no points actually being made, just appeasement and some weird passive aggressiveness.
I work in a company who's mantra is Get s
t Done. They're corporate, sure but there's an environment that everyone respects, all politics are dropped on the way in, anyone bringing any bullst gets called out on it so it doesnt spread. It works for us fairly well, it's OK to question the CEO on what he's actually saying. I think it helps that there are people from different nationalities all speaking English though, any metaphorical cloudy language gets rebuked with a 'what's your point, what do you mean' question fairly quickly. I think there should be a veto against corporate bulls
t which typically tends to be from middle level people. The top level dont need to impress anyone, the lower level dont give a fk, it's the middle lot who're jockying for climbing up some ladder they think they need to climb in order to be more successfulHmmm... it appears that much of this "This meeting named <operation BS> has people standing up, arriving at 9 am, proceeds to 9.10 am, only the following people will speak, everyone there" etc. etc. are for those who work in IT. People who maybe aren't so great at grasping exactly how things will happen and how best to communicate with each other in an effective manner thereby needing an awful lot of structure to do it effectively.
I have been to far too many meetings in my working life (meeting = event for the underemployed) of a whole range of types. Some of them could probably be called "scrums" from this terminology. Except every one was called a "meeting", sometimes a team-A-meeting, team-B-meeting, whole-staff-meeting etc. to define who should attend. A time and place given (or the same details every week) an agenda circulated beforehand if appropriate and finishing time given if appropriate. Nothing more BS-itty than that needed, it just seems like dressing things up in the Emperors New Clothes to sell it as a training for people who aren't that great at communication.
I have been to far too many meetings in my working life (meeting = event for the underemployed) of a whole range of types. Some of them could probably be called "scrums" from this terminology. Except every one was called a "meeting", sometimes a team-A-meeting, team-B-meeting, whole-staff-meeting etc. to define who should attend. A time and place given (or the same details every week) an agenda circulated beforehand if appropriate and finishing time given if appropriate. Nothing more BS-itty than that needed, it just seems like dressing things up in the Emperors New Clothes to sell it as a training for people who aren't that great at communication.
Edited by Shaolin on Tuesday 20th January 11:16
Shaolin said:
Hmmm... it appears that much of this "This meeting named <operation BS> has people standing up, arriving at 9 am, proceeds to 9.10 am, only the following people will speak, everyone there" etc. etc. are for those who work in IT. People who maybe aren't so great at grasping exactly how things will happen and how best to communicate with each other in an effective manner thereby needing an awful lot of structure to do it effectively.
Do you have any idea of how insulting this statement is to those of us who work in IT? And also how completely wide of the mark you are?Look, I get that you don't understand this system and have no interest in doing so. But dismissing it out of hand as some faddish rubbish when actually it's a recognised methodology and has been for 20-odd years just makes you look ignorant.
iphonedyou said:
Dear god, really? That's not technically a verb in English, is it?
http://xkcd.com/1443/
iphonedyou said:
NailedOn said:
Did we do 'Architect' yet? As in the verb to: design; solution or imagine.
If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Dear god, really? That's not technically a verb in English, is it?If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
OED said:
1 Design and build (a machine or structure):
the men who engineered the tunnel
1.1 Modify (an organism) by manipulating its genetic material:
(as adjective, with submodifier engineered) genetically engineered plants
2 Skilfully arrange for (something) to occur:
she engineered another meeting with him
the men who engineered the tunnel
1.1 Modify (an organism) by manipulating its genetic material:
(as adjective, with submodifier engineered) genetically engineered plants
2 Skilfully arrange for (something) to occur:
she engineered another meeting with him
iphonedyou said:
NailedOn said:
Did we do 'Architect' yet? As in the verb to: design; solution or imagine.
If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Dear god, really? That's not technically a verb in English, is it?If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
CraigyMc said:
iphonedyou said:
NailedOn said:
Did we do 'Architect' yet? As in the verb to: design; solution or imagine.
If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Dear god, really? That's not technically a verb in English, is it?If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Tyre Tread said:
CraigyMc said:
iphonedyou said:
NailedOn said:
Did we do 'Architect' yet? As in the verb to: design; solution or imagine.
If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Dear god, really? That's not technically a verb in English, is it?If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Neil H said:
“We’d just got everyone pregnant with the idea and were about to pull the trigger for a quick win..."
Overheard just now.
Now that is a true bullsOverheard just now.
t phrase. Can we get back to these? I'd contribute more only I have to attend a blue-sky imagineering workshop to solutionize our near-term strategies for leveraging the low-hanging fruit and maximise our immediate synergies going forwards.deckster said:
Now that is a true bullst phrase. Can we get back to these? I'd contribute more only I have to attend a blue-sky imagineering workshop to solutionize our near-term strategies for leveraging the low-hanging fruit and maximise our immediate synergies going forwards.
Totally. I'm running that one up my flag pole and saluting it. t phrase. Can we get back to these? I'd contribute more only I have to attend a blue-sky imagineering workshop to solutionize our near-term strategies for leveraging the low-hanging fruit and maximise our immediate synergies going forwards.
CraigyMc said:
iphonedyou said:
NailedOn said:
Did we do 'Architect' yet? As in the verb to: design; solution or imagine.
If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Dear god, really? That's not technically a verb in English, is it?If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
deckster said:
Tyre Tread said:
CraigyMc said:
iphonedyou said:
NailedOn said:
Did we do 'Architect' yet? As in the verb to: design; solution or imagine.
If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
Dear god, really? That's not technically a verb in English, is it?If you folks could go architect the solution then we'll engineer (verb) the deliverables.
In one word, what do the following do:
Fireman
Surgeon
Paramedic
Director
King
Estate Agent
etc.
Not all activities or roles can be descibed in one word.
Tyre Tread said:
Oh I am. The brief was what an architect does in one word. The best single word is design. To qualify that you would need more words but effectively that's what they do.
In one word, what do the following do:
Fireman
Surgeon
Paramedic
Director
King
Estate Agent
etc.
Not all activities or roles can be descibed in one word.
I like the thought of Firemen firemanning, surgeons surgeoning etc In one word, what do the following do:
Fireman
Surgeon
Paramedic
Director
King
Estate Agent
etc.
Not all activities or roles can be descibed in one word.
A lot of this thread is bks.
A daily Scrum is not the same as a daily meeting.
Can a daily meeting have 20 attendees who are all managers and last for 45 minutes? Yes.
Can a daily Scrum have 20 attendees who are all managers and last for 45 minutes? Absolutely not.
A Scrum is a specific type of meeting with a specific format and a specific goal. It is jargon but is not management bullst.
Using a phrase like 'touch base' instead of meeting could be considered bullst.
"I touched base with a couple of the guys and decided XYZ"
vs
"I had a meeting with a couple of the guys and decided XYZ"
Both mean the same thing, but one uses a bullst term.
ks.A daily Scrum is not the same as a daily meeting.
Can a daily meeting have 20 attendees who are all managers and last for 45 minutes? Yes.
Can a daily Scrum have 20 attendees who are all managers and last for 45 minutes? Absolutely not.
A Scrum is a specific type of meeting with a specific format and a specific goal. It is jargon but is not management bulls
t.Using a phrase like 'touch base' instead of meeting could be considered bulls
t. "I touched base with a couple of the guys and decided XYZ"
vs
"I had a meeting with a couple of the guys and decided XYZ"
Both mean the same thing, but one uses a bulls
t term.Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff