Chat up lines/topics of conversation for pulling

[blindswelledrat]

i remember said:

If you were a burger you'd be a McGorgeous.

Jesus. Terrible. A slight variation

If you were a burger, I would still want to bum you and sellotape wasps to your tits.

That's got to be a winner.

[sleep envy]

bsr - is that what they mean at BK when they say 'Have it Your Way'?

[vz-r_dave]

After my recent set backs I used the line

"Excuse me, my ex gf cheated on me and left me on Wednesday and I dont want to go home alone. Do you want to join me"

It worked but I cant say she was the most attractive girl I've ever slept with.

Desperate times for desperate people, I dont think i'll be using it again lol

[blindswelledrat]

sleep envy said:

bsr - is that what they mean at BK when they say 'Have it Your Way'?

Would make a good defense in court I reckon.

[sleep envy]

vz-r_dave said:

After my recent set backs I used the line

"Excuse me, my ex gf cheated on me and left me on Wednesday and I dont want to go home alone. Do you want to join me"

It worked but I cant say she was the most attractive girl I've ever slept with.

Desperate times for desperate people, I dont think i'll be using it again lol

did she leave £10 on the side before she left?

[Famous Graham]

"Fancy a fk" has worked in the past.

Mind you, saying it in front of her ex-boyfriend wasn't the smartest move.

[vz-r_dave]

sleep envy said:

vz-r_dave said:

After my recent set backs I used the line

"Excuse me, my ex gf cheated on me and left me on Wednesday and I dont want to go home alone. Do you want to join me"

It worked but I cant say she was the most attractive girl I've ever slept with.

Desperate times for desperate people, I dont think i'll be using it again lol

did she leave £10 on the side before she left?

No but I did drive her back to hers, 5 euro os on in petrol I think ;-)

[isee]

Roses are red
Viloets are blue
I got a knife
get in the fking van

[Dave200]

vz-r_dave said:

After my recent set backs I used the line

"Excuse me, my ex gf cheated on me and left me on Wednesday and I dont want to go home alone. Do you want to join me"

It worked but I cant say she was the most attractive girl I've ever slept with.

Desperate times for desperate people, I dont think i'll be using it again lol

Any port in a storm. Good work for moving on/up/down.

[Petrolhead_Rich]

Ive always played it cool, been friendly but not gone out of my way, got quite a few birds by the end of the night asking for my number, or "borrowing my phone" then giving it back saying, "oh ive put my number on there".

Few years ago got a new phone and did this, she said "oh let me have a go on it (the phone)" and was sat playing games, 5 mins later she comes and sits next to me and shows me a pic of her in her bra, then goes to send it from her phone to mine, i jus kinda said yes, after 15 mins i had 20 odd pics of her in varying degrees of her birthday suit!

Also had a lass (my current GF actually) invite herself to the cinema with me and my ex (when we were together), sat talking to me all night, Ex wasnt too happy, especially 2 weeks later when i left her for current GF

And im not pulling munters either, before that is suggested!!!

[Justayellowbadge]

You. Are. A. God.

I presume you and Dave run in the same pack?

[ShadownINja]

Justayellowbadge said:

You. Are. A. God.

I presume you and Dave run in the same pack?

My thinking precisely. Perhaps he's Dave's wingman.

[sonic_2k_uk]

Frankeh said:

Adenauer said:

Dave200 said:

Adenauer said:

Dave200 said:

assume you were still dealing with puberty...

I am, my 14 year old daughter asked me last night if she could go on the pill?

14 FFS

Better than dealing with the consequences of a burst condom...

You sound like my wife

True though, but 14??? Bloody Nora, my little girl's growing up

14?! Jesus. Is the reason to have sex, or to control her periods (Cramps, etc)?

Part of me thinks give them to her. Stops her getting pregnant.
The other part thinks that she then might not make the little scrote wear a condom if she knows she's on the pill. Likewise, if boys find out she's on the pill they could convince her not to make them wear a condom.

If she's old enough to bleed, she's old enough to butcher.



I most definitely have been waiting for an opportunity to use this since hearing it.

[Justayellowbadge]

sonic_2k_uk said:

If she's old enough to bleed, she's old enough to butcher.

I know it's the internet and all that, but you do get that Adaneuer is a real person at the other end of his keyboard, and that that is his 14 year old daughter you are talking about?

You do get that, right?

[sonic_2k_uk]

Justayellowbadge said:

sonic_2k_uk said:

If she's old enough to bleed, she's old enough to butcher.

I know it's the internet and all that, but you do get that Adaneuer is a real person at the other end of his keyboard, and that that is his 14 year old daughter you are talking about?

You do get that, right?

I'm sure he's a big boy.

ETA: i do appreciate it is perhaps a little borderline.

Edited by sonic_2k_uk on Wednesday 28th July 17:03

[Disastrous]

Petrolhead_Rich said:

Ive always played it cool, been friendly but not gone out of my way, got quite a few birds by the end of the night asking for my number, or "borrowing my phone" then giving it back saying, "oh ive put my number on there".

Few years ago got a new phone and did this, she said "oh let me have a go on it (the phone)" and was sat playing games, 5 mins later she comes and sits next to me and shows me a pic of her in her bra, then goes to send it from her phone to mine, i jus kinda said yes, after 15 mins i had 20 odd pics of her in varying degrees of her birthday suit!

Also had a lass (my current GF actually) invite herself to the cinema with me and my ex (when we were together), sat talking to me all night, Ex wasnt too happy, especially 2 weeks later when i left her for current GF

And im not pulling munters either, before that is suggested!!!

Truly impressive. I hope you High-five your boys after each conquest? I know I do.

[hman]

Turning up at a bar to meet chums with a motorbike and a spare lid worked a treat, a spin round the block with her as pillion usually ended up with a good result later on.

[Plotloss]

i remember said:

If you were a burger you'd be a McGorgeous.

I'm actually proud to say that if you tried that on any of my female friends, in all probably they'd knock you out.

Who does that work on?

Deaf birds?

Fat chavs in tracksuits?

Who?

[snakeswitht1ts]

[quote=Petrolhead_Rich]Ive always played it cool, been friendly but not gone out of my way, got quite a few birds by the end of the night asking for my number, or "borrowing my phone" then giving it back saying, "oh ive put my number on there".

Few years ago got a new phone and did this, she said "oh let me have a go on it (the phone)" and was sat playing games, 5 mins later she comes and sits next to me and shows me a pic of her in her bra, then goes to send it from her phone to mine, i jus kinda said yes, after 15 mins i had 20 odd pics of her in varying degrees of her birthday suit!

quote]

Did this actually happen or did you see it in a film?

[andyjo1982]

Petrolhead_Rich said:

Ive always played it cool, been friendly but not gone out of my way, got quite a few birds by the end of the night asking for my number, or "borrowing my phone" then giving it back saying, "oh ive put my number on there".

Few years ago got a new phone and did this, she said "oh let me have a go on it (the phone)" and was sat playing games, 5 mins later she comes and sits next to me and shows me a pic of her in her bra, then goes to send it from her phone to mine, i jus kinda said yes, after 15 mins i had 20 odd pics of her in varying degrees of her birthday suit!

I bloody hate it when that happens, you know, just sat in the corner on your mobile playing snake and some busty beauty steels your phone and fills your memory with pics of her dd's. grrrr, one of my pet hates...