What is cheating?
Poll: What is cheating?
Total Members Polled: 447
Discussion
Justayellowbadge said:
Petrolhead_Rich said:
Justayellowbadge said:
Cock Womble 7 said:
Maybe it's just me, but if some bird invited me to share a bed "just to sleep", she'd be getting the sex, one way or another.
That could be construed as a touch, well, rapey.unless of course its your sister/brother
oh, and your not from certain parts of America!!
For me it would be doing something that I could not tell my other half about.
If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
SeeFive said:
For me it would be doing something that I could not tell my other half about.
If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
But who says you have to tell your OH everything ?If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
By this, I mean, if you happen to get chatting to someone and it gets slightly above friendly and you have a little flirt... No harm done; you go home to your beloved at the end of the night in the know that you still have some appeal and you could have bagged it etc etc.
Some people are in a relationship where telling their OH about a situation like this would cause a lot of problems.
Glassman said:
SeeFive said:
For me it would be doing something that I could not tell my other half about.
If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
But who says you have to tell your OH everything ?If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
By this, I mean, if you happen to get chatting to someone and it gets slightly above friendly and you have a little flirt... No harm done; you go home to your beloved at the end of the night in the know that you still have some appeal and you could have bagged it etc etc.
Some people are in a relationship where telling their OH about a situation like this would cause a lot of problems.
When your example has happened, I walk away early and am able to tell my missus. I have no need for ego boosts like that. Don't get me wrong, I am no angel but I will only flirt if she is with me - which she tells me I do quite a bit and doesn't really mind.
Works for me.
rudecherub said:
Actually you've missed the real cheating off the list, that's giving someone else your heart ie switching your emotional attachment, seeking emotional support, confiding in, and seeking advice about important and personal matters, the other things are pretty meaningless as stand alone events.
I knew a girl who argued that it wasn't cheating if she was shagging someone else so long as she was thinking of her bf at the time. Is that covered by what you say? 
Fetchez la vache said:
I knew a girl who argued that it wasn't cheating if she was shagging someone else so long as she was thinking of her bf at the time. Is that covered by what you say?
Oh I like that. Conversely if her BF was shagging her and thinking about the fit girl in the office, BUT not straying physically then presumably she would say he WAS cheating. Fetchez la vache said:
rudecherub said:
Actually you've missed the real cheating off the list, that's giving someone else your heart ie switching your emotional attachment, seeking emotional support, confiding in, and seeking advice about important and personal matters, the other things are pretty meaningless as stand alone events.
I knew a girl who argued that it wasn't cheating if she was shagging someone else so long as she was thinking of her bf at the time. Is that covered by what you say? SeeFive said:
Glassman said:
SeeFive said:
For me it would be doing something that I could not tell my other half about.
If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
But who says you have to tell your OH everything ?If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
By this, I mean, if you happen to get chatting to someone and it gets slightly above friendly and you have a little flirt... No harm done; you go home to your beloved at the end of the night in the know that you still have some appeal and you could have bagged it etc etc.
Some people are in a relationship where telling their OH about a situation like this would cause a lot of problems.
When your example has happened, I walk away early and am able to tell my missus. I have no need for ego boosts like that. Don't get me wrong, I am no angel but I will only flirt if she is with me - which she tells me I do quite a bit and doesn't really mind.
Works for me.
Glassman said:
SeeFive said:
Glassman said:
SeeFive said:
For me it would be doing something that I could not tell my other half about.
If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
But who says you have to tell your OH everything ?If I can't say that I can tell her about it afterwards, I just don't do it.
The limit of course depends very much on the type of relationship you are in. If you are swingers or something like that, the limits are very different to to the norm.
By this, I mean, if you happen to get chatting to someone and it gets slightly above friendly and you have a little flirt... No harm done; you go home to your beloved at the end of the night in the know that you still have some appeal and you could have bagged it etc etc.
Some people are in a relationship where telling their OH about a situation like this would cause a lot of problems.
When your example has happened, I walk away early and am able to tell my missus. I have no need for ego boosts like that. Don't get me wrong, I am no angel but I will only flirt if she is with me - which she tells me I do quite a bit and doesn't really mind.
Works for me.
It's purely because I feel more comfortable in her being confident that there is nothing wrong happening. I would not do something that I was not comfortable with - and my approach means that this includes something that could cause her concern. I care about her and try to make her life as happy and secure as I can. It also makes the relationship so much better.
If she is there, she can see for herself that it is harmless, we can all have a laugh together. It's kind of an extension of general humour and ripping the piss out of others, nothing sinister. Also, if I go too far she can put me right afterwards - it hasn't happened, I guess due to the trust that we have in each other, but I would rely on her to do that if I overstepped the mark.
Fetchez la vache said:
rudecherub said:
Actually you've missed the real cheating off the list, that's giving someone else your heart ie switching your emotional attachment, seeking emotional support, confiding in, and seeking advice about important and personal matters, the other things are pretty meaningless as stand alone events.
I knew a girl who argued that it wasn't cheating if she was shagging someone else so long as she was thinking of her bf at the time. Is that covered by what you say? My point to the OP was that emotional infidelity is more serious than physical infidelity, most of the list to choose from is the stuff actors go to work to do.
Note I send stand alone events, a mistake say a kiss last seconds - is that worse than harbouring deep affection for someone - something that can go on for weeks or months?
Even a drunken one night stand represents less investment mentally and emotionally.
It's human to concentrate on the physical process of what goes into which hole, but if sex = love = lasting monogamous relationship we'd all still be with our first partner.
A relationship is more complicated than that, it's about what we feel and how we intelligently decide to deal with those feelings when inevitably the limerent feelings wear down, where we go from there depends on conscious choices.
k' - no harm done.. 
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