Surviving the mental?

[dave-therave]

Haha, I saw that coming.

Don't get me wrong, if the opportunity arose I wouldn't turn it down. I'm just saying I'm not actively trying to get in her pants.

[TotalControl]

chim said:

crofty1984 said:

dave-therave said:

chim said:

So do you want to bang her.

She's a beautiful girl but probably not, she's too good a friend I am a homosexual.

Her mates on the other hand,(who are mostly male) yum.

Edited for further effect

[Famous Graham]

dave-therave said:

Haha, I saw that coming.

Don't get me wrong, if the opportunity arose I wouldn't turn it down. I'm just saying I'm not actively trying to get in her pants.

You lying toad

[Shay HTFC]

chim said:

crofty1984 said:

dave-theraver said:

chim said:

So do you want to bang her.

She's a beautiful girl but probably not, she's too good a friend I am a homosexual.

Her mates on the other hand,(who are mostly male) yum.

And for even further effect.

[chim]

Famous Graham said:

dave-therave said:

Haha, I saw that coming.

Don't get me wrong, if the opportunity arose I wouldn't turn it down. I'm just saying I'm not actively trying to get in her pants.

You lying toad

Exactly.

Stop trying to delude yourself man. Think about it, you have posted on PH asking for tips on sharing a flat with your new female flat mate. Translated into PH speak (as I am sure you well know) this comes out as,

"I have a new flat mate that is well fit, I am looking for tips on how to impress her and the best way to get into her knickers"

So we can all stop with the pretense now and help you out with the matter in hand.

We will of course require proper pics though, these are needed in order to assess the level of cunning required to get into her knickers.

Edited by chim on Sunday 19th September 15:48

[dave-therave]

You're totally wrong....


It's a house not a flat

The rest is pretty accurate though to be fair.

Any more tips? I don't get the whole bin in the bathroom thing but I might pick one up tomorrow.

Spent the afternoon watching girls of the playboy mansion. Could be worse!

[NoNeed]

I think the best thing would be to keep us posted on everything you do/say and everything she does/says. like a running commentary.
Then we can offer advice that suits the moment.

Toptip from me would be.
1/ Always be nice to and talk nicely about her mother, even if she is having a mental moment and slagging her off. Some freinds may fall into this catagory too but we would need pics to be sure.

2/ Clean up after yourself, and where the bathroom is concerned an open window with a bit of spray will help.

3/ DO NOT smother her, she will never enter your space whilst you are camped in hers.



But a running commentary is what's really required.

[y282]

• bookmarked*

[Laurel Green]

NoNeed said:

But a running commentary is what's really required.

Web-cam + microphone and, if OP has an earpiece, we can give suggestions on what to do/say next.

[escargot]

Good luck.

[LukeBird]

You may as well just hit it now.

Everyone knows you want her and you should just get it out of the way.
You don't want to end up looking at prison time after you make her a hair pie and wait in her room for her to come back from work, complete with candles and a belt around your neck, pumping your fist like that.

Then she'll know.

And it will be bad.

Just tell her now you want 'it' and do it.

[RoadRat99]

chim said:

Famous Graham said:

dave-therave said:

Haha, I saw that coming.

Don't get me wrong, if the opportunity arose I wouldn't turn it down. I'm just saying I'm not actively trying to get in her pants.

You lying toad

Exactly.

Stop trying to delude yourself man. Think about it, you have posted on PH asking for tips on sharing a flat with your new female flat mate. Translated into PH speak (as I am sure you well know) this comes out as,

"I have a new flat mate that is well fit, I am looking for tips on how to impress her and the best way to get into her knickers"

So we can all stop with the pretense now and help you out with the matter in hand.

We will of course require proper pics though, these are needed in order to assess the level of cunning required to get into her knickers.

Edited by chim on Sunday 19th September 15:48

[dave-therave]

Running commentary:

She's currently asleep on the sofa. Trying to resist waking her up and telling her it's time to cook dinner.

before anyone asks, I'm not taking photos of her when she's asleep, that'd be a bit too creepy

[Cock Womble 7]

dave-therave said:

Here's one for you:

Oh do fk off.

We all know you're a spawny bd, silver-tongued snapper with an uncanny ability to make birds whap their baps out while you make megapixel magic.

And we are lead to believe that one of your "subjects" has rocked up at your gaff wanting a bed for a while.

And you're worried about how you can avoid "The Mental"?

fk "The Mental"; I would quite happily accept both 12-bore barrels of The Mental administered via an intraveneous drip to my left bk and rounded off with a million paper cuts to my bell-end in order to see that raiding my fridge.

[escargot]

LukeBird said:

You may as well just hit it now.

Everyone knows you want her and you should just get it out of the way.
You don't want to end up looking at prison time after you make her a hair pie and wait in her room for her to come back from work, complete with candles and a belt around your neck, pumping your fist like that.

Then she'll know.

And it will be bad.

Just tell her now you want 'it' and do it.

Yep.

As long as you give her fair notice that you intend to indulge yourself in the pleasures of her vagina. I can't see any reason why she'd complain.

[Rocksteadyeddie]

escargot said:

Good luck.

With the thread, or the quest?

[jimmystratos]

Can I suggesat not leaving your computer on with this thread displayed?

[chim]

Cock Womble 7 said:

dave-therave said:

Here's one for you:

Oh do fk off.

We all know you're a spawny bd, silver-tongued snapper with an uncanny ability to make birds whap their baps out while you make megapixel magic.

And we are lead to believe that one of your "subjects" has rocked up at your gaff wanting a bed for a while.

And you're worried about how you can avoid "The Mental"?

fk "The Mental"; I would quite happily accept both 12-bore barrels of The Mental administered via an intraveneous drip to my left bk and rounded off with a million paper cuts to my bell-end in order to see that raiding my fridge.

st, just noticed it is THE dave, you are my fecking hero and you are asking me (well not me exactly, but you know what I mean) for advice. Well fk me over with a wooden spoon wrapped in melted sugar.

You took that pic of the bird in the fridge did'ent you, I want your life, I want it so so badly it hurts. At the very least I want to come and hide in your wardrobe for a few hours. st, will even hide in the fridge as long as you get her to open it before my todger falls off with the cold.

You sir are a God amongst men and we are humbled by your presence.






bd, sorry, moment of jealousy there

[ymwoods]

My GF has a bum just like that too...hang on, where is my GF!

[dave-therave]

chim said:

Cock Womble 7 said:

dave-therave said:

Here's one for you:

Oh do fk off.

We all know you're a spawny bd, silver-tongued snapper with an uncanny ability to make birds whap their baps out while you make megapixel magic.

And we are lead to believe that one of your "subjects" has rocked up at your gaff wanting a bed for a while.

And you're worried about how you can avoid "The Mental"?

fk "The Mental"; I would quite happily accept both 12-bore barrels of The Mental administered via an intraveneous drip to my left bk and rounded off with a million paper cuts to my bell-end in order to see that raiding my fridge.

st, just noticed it is THE dave, you are my fecking hero and you are asking me (well not me exactly, but you know what I mean) for advice. Well fk me over with a wooden spoon wrapped in melted sugar.

You took that pic of the bird in the fridge did'ent you, I want your life, I want it so so badly it hurts. At the very least I want to come and hide in your wardrobe for a few hours. st, will even hide in the fridge as long as you get her to open it before my todger falls off with the cold.

You sir are a God amongst men and we are humbled by your presence.






bd, sorry, moment of jealousy there

Haha, thank you.

The thread was less about seducing her and more about living with women.

I did indeed take the fridge photo I'd be happy to swap lives for a weekend as long as I get your Aston!