How to calm down...
Discussion
Rickyy said:
When you get like that, remove yourself from the situation, warn people you're likely to explode and that you'd like to be left alone. The silliest, smallest remark made by someone can push you over the edge and make you snap.
I already do this. I had to learn this a while ago
Jasandjules said:
Go speak to your best friend - not some t**t you speak to now and again, but the person who you have no secrets from, the person you would call when you are in the s**t and need help. Tell this person what you've put up here. Ask for their help.
Go from there.
You're right. He is the bloke who got me the job I'm starting tomorrow. I'll have a word over a pint. I was actually in primary with him funnily enough Go from there.
The Nur said:
Jasandjules said:
Go speak to your best friend - not some t**t you speak to now and again, but the person who you have no secrets from, the person you would call when you are in the s**t and need help. Tell this person what you've put up here. Ask for their help.
Go from there.
You're right. He is the bloke who got me the job I'm starting tomorrow. I'll have a word over a pint. I was actually in primary with him funnily enough Go from there.
The Nur said:
I already do this. I had to learn this a while ago
You've been experiencing it a while then? I'm not trying to diagnose you, just sharing my experiences. Have you ever considered you may be depressed? Anger is quite a common trait of depression in men. I only ask because, I'm similar age as you (just turned 24) and some of your OP rings true with me. I had a really hard time from the age of 21 until recently with stress, I'd bottle it up and it'd turn me into a quick tempered maniac. Like you I'd snap at the ones closest to me.
Best of luck!
surveyor said:
Can't help other than to say acknowledging you have a problem, must be the start. Plan on showing this to my teenage step-son who is convinced weed can do no harm...
Good idea.Of course they 'know everything' at that age, and won't be told that what they're doing is potentially harmful, and maybe even very dangerous.
Ask any former stoners if they wished they'd done things differently, knowing what they know now.
I for one say "yes".
The world is full of knobs, I find myself seemingly hating everyone. I am exactly like you although slightly younger. I think maybe you should take a holiday or try some new things. May find some new interests or meet like minded people.
I constantly have conflicting emotions with life but try and be content with what I have and not with what I havent. Though this makes it hard to find new experiences so sometimes the apple has to fall far from the tree.
I constantly have conflicting emotions with life but try and be content with what I have and not with what I havent. Though this makes it hard to find new experiences so sometimes the apple has to fall far from the tree.
R1gtr said:
Do that, also suggest taking up a new hobbie together, learn to ride a motorbike etc, focus on something new and attainable.
Climbing is great for getting your head straight, giving you continuing goals no matter how good you are and absorbing a lot of your time if you want it to.
Or start learning how to rebuild engines and playing with cars etc. Although that takes a fair bit of money.
And of course, like already stated, kick the weed.
A recently 'exed' friend of mine sounds very similar to you. He's 49 and smokes an alarming amount of weed every single day. In the 9 years I've known him, he's struggled to keep a job for any length of time, he's constantly angry, goes through big depressions and blames everything in the world for his problems except himself. He's been threatening to emigrate to Canada/Australia/New Zealand for 9 years, yet wouldn't even get in now at his age even if he did get off his lazy arse.
The best thing the OP has done is recognise there's a problem. The drugs may form part of it, but there will be other things getting at you. For what it's worth, I can completely empathise with descriptions of difficulties with social situations and the like.
It's worth knowing that the person who can do all of those things is probably locked up inside your head and it won't take a miracle to release him. Counselling referred via your GP is very possibly a good way to approach your headspace as it is now and go from there.
The best thing the OP has done is recognise there's a problem. The drugs may form part of it, but there will be other things getting at you. For what it's worth, I can completely empathise with descriptions of difficulties with social situations and the like.
It's worth knowing that the person who can do all of those things is probably locked up inside your head and it won't take a miracle to release him. Counselling referred via your GP is very possibly a good way to approach your headspace as it is now and go from there.
You seem to be echoing what my son is going though a the moment,so much that he now wants to go to Aus and stay in his chosen profession as a chef.
I'm all for him changing his life to get out of the dope sceen though I think a bit drastic
As to the point is find a aim and stick to it .
Good luck.
I'm all for him changing his life to get out of the dope sceen though I think a bit drastic
As to the point is find a aim and stick to it .
Good luck.
Can't offer any advice re drug use, but you may find that mindfulness/meditation is useful for anxiety and anger
e.g. https://www.facebook.com/events/408094499236789/
e.g. https://www.facebook.com/events/408094499236789/
Your situation is vaguely similar to that of a good friend of mine.
Our whole group smoked between 15-20ish but we all stopped at uni or when we started working, he smoked everyday (and drank fairly heavily most days too) from about 17 - 29, over 10 years of smoking weed every day. He dropped out of his first Uni course due to drugs, weed, drink and girl issues. We all got decent degrees and so by 25ish he was a waster with serious social and life issues and we were slowly losing contact.
However, he met someone, fell in love, married a year or so later and then by 29 his son was born. He promised his wife he'd sort himself out. He cut his drinking down but still smoked weed every evening, never around her. Took him a while but having a baby just forced him to clean up and be responsible (not suggesting you have a baby!).
He's now fairly happy, fairly "clean" from drink/drugs though still enjoys both infrequently, has a decent job and is a totally different person to who he was 5 years ago when I hated him and frankly expected him to die due to his issues.
So people can change, you may find that getting back to Uni means you meet someone new, meeting someone new who doesn't like weed might be the turning point to quit.
Start reducing your weed smoking by socialising wherever possible with people who don;t smoke or won't tolerate it (family?). Make yours joints weaker, try to buy less, smoke fags instead. Just work or reducing your dependence a bit. Good luck.
Our whole group smoked between 15-20ish but we all stopped at uni or when we started working, he smoked everyday (and drank fairly heavily most days too) from about 17 - 29, over 10 years of smoking weed every day. He dropped out of his first Uni course due to drugs, weed, drink and girl issues. We all got decent degrees and so by 25ish he was a waster with serious social and life issues and we were slowly losing contact.
However, he met someone, fell in love, married a year or so later and then by 29 his son was born. He promised his wife he'd sort himself out. He cut his drinking down but still smoked weed every evening, never around her. Took him a while but having a baby just forced him to clean up and be responsible (not suggesting you have a baby!).
He's now fairly happy, fairly "clean" from drink/drugs though still enjoys both infrequently, has a decent job and is a totally different person to who he was 5 years ago when I hated him and frankly expected him to die due to his issues.
So people can change, you may find that getting back to Uni means you meet someone new, meeting someone new who doesn't like weed might be the turning point to quit.
Start reducing your weed smoking by socialising wherever possible with people who don;t smoke or won't tolerate it (family?). Make yours joints weaker, try to buy less, smoke fags instead. Just work or reducing your dependence a bit. Good luck.
Firstly, you've made the first step with getting off a drug - you've recognised you want to. So my advice would be to spend a 6 months to a year travelling, by yourself.
This will have 3 effects that you need;
- You will lose contact with weed and your familiar environment, so will have little or no option to 'score' any more of it.
- You'll have so much to do and sort out on your travels, you won't have much chance to get battered.
- You will have to talk to people at some point whether you want to or not.
If you're stuck for something to say to anyone - start with your story. I quit weed, I needed to get out and tell it like you have in the OP... the rest is easy.
I know of several people who've been travelling by themselves and they've all come back changed people with loads of stories to tell. Social situations are never a problem if you have stories to tell...
Secondly, weed is not actually such an evil thing. Sure you're at the stage where you've come to realise you need to kick the habit, but do not forget, we are physically designed to accept weed - we have cannabinoid receptors in our brains. It's the only artificially ingested drug that our brains are designed to accept (as opposed to other narcotics which affect the brain to overproduce internal hormones or neurotransmitters). Some people need weed to feel or act normal. It suppresses aggression, stress and helps the human mind detach itself from the animal. This is good for people who are too easily ruled by their hormones.
The main problem with weed is how the establishment push the negatives. Weed makes you less eager to work yourself to death for a system that doesn't care. This is why the establishment hate it and fear it more than any other drug...
This will have 3 effects that you need;
- You will lose contact with weed and your familiar environment, so will have little or no option to 'score' any more of it.
- You'll have so much to do and sort out on your travels, you won't have much chance to get battered.
- You will have to talk to people at some point whether you want to or not.
If you're stuck for something to say to anyone - start with your story. I quit weed, I needed to get out and tell it like you have in the OP... the rest is easy.
I know of several people who've been travelling by themselves and they've all come back changed people with loads of stories to tell. Social situations are never a problem if you have stories to tell...
Secondly, weed is not actually such an evil thing. Sure you're at the stage where you've come to realise you need to kick the habit, but do not forget, we are physically designed to accept weed - we have cannabinoid receptors in our brains. It's the only artificially ingested drug that our brains are designed to accept (as opposed to other narcotics which affect the brain to overproduce internal hormones or neurotransmitters). Some people need weed to feel or act normal. It suppresses aggression, stress and helps the human mind detach itself from the animal. This is good for people who are too easily ruled by their hormones.
The main problem with weed is how the establishment push the negatives. Weed makes you less eager to work yourself to death for a system that doesn't care. This is why the establishment hate it and fear it more than any other drug...
You have a clear understanding of the negative effects this activity is having on you and your life, I am interested how you intend making changes and sustaining them rather then asking for random suggestions from a forum. Out of interest, from the replys you have already had, how many of them have you taken seriously. I dentify what is your motivation for making changes now, what would be the benefit and what support do you need to achieve this. Good luck
mattikake said:
Firstly, you've made the first step with getting off a drug - you've recognised you want to. So my advice would be to spend a 6 months to a year travelling, by yourself.
This will have 3 effects that you need;
- You will lose contact with weed and your familiar environment, so will have little or no option to 'score' any more of it.
- You'll have so much to do and sort out on your travels, you won't have much chance to get battered.
- You will have to talk to people at some point whether you want to or not.
If you're stuck for something to say to anyone - start with your story. I quit weed, I needed to get out and tell it like you have in the OP... the rest is easy.
I know of several people who've been travelling by themselves and they've all come back changed people with loads of stories to tell. Social situations are never a problem if you have stories to tell...
Secondly, weed is not actually such an evil thing. Sure you're at the stage where you've come to realise you need to kick the habit, but do not forget, we are physically designed to accept weed - we have cannabinoid receptors in our brains. It's the only artificially ingested drug that our brains are designed to accept (as opposed to other narcotics which affect the brain to overproduce internal hormones or neurotransmitters). Some people need weed to feel or act normal. It suppresses aggression, stress and helps the human mind detach itself from the animal. This is good for people who are too easily ruled by their hormones.
The main problem with weed is how the establishment push the negatives. Weed makes you less eager to work yourself to death for a system that doesn't care. This is why the establishment hate it and fear it more than any other drug...
1st point great adviceThis will have 3 effects that you need;
- You will lose contact with weed and your familiar environment, so will have little or no option to 'score' any more of it.
- You'll have so much to do and sort out on your travels, you won't have much chance to get battered.
- You will have to talk to people at some point whether you want to or not.
If you're stuck for something to say to anyone - start with your story. I quit weed, I needed to get out and tell it like you have in the OP... the rest is easy.
I know of several people who've been travelling by themselves and they've all come back changed people with loads of stories to tell. Social situations are never a problem if you have stories to tell...
Secondly, weed is not actually such an evil thing. Sure you're at the stage where you've come to realise you need to kick the habit, but do not forget, we are physically designed to accept weed - we have cannabinoid receptors in our brains. It's the only artificially ingested drug that our brains are designed to accept (as opposed to other narcotics which affect the brain to overproduce internal hormones or neurotransmitters). Some people need weed to feel or act normal. It suppresses aggression, stress and helps the human mind detach itself from the animal. This is good for people who are too easily ruled by their hormones.
The main problem with weed is how the establishment push the negatives. Weed makes you less eager to work yourself to death for a system that doesn't care. This is why the establishment hate it and fear it more than any other drug...
2nd point not so great. It's like smoking cigs and telling people its good for you because it (insert justification for you doing it here) relaxes you or whatever.
17 years of smoking a hell of a lot of weed I've never had any evidence of the benefit apart from pain relief for friend who has MS.
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