alcoholism advice

[wisbechlad]

Definitely go to see a doctor as well. DO NOT cold turkey alcohol before this. A small percentage of people get Delerium Tremens if they go cold turkey due to serotonin levels shooting up and frying their brain - happened to a colleague of mine. He saw blue devils. Unfortunately, did so much damage that even thiugh we got him to hospital, in the end he died.

[rock bottom]

thanks for everyone's support and advice

it really does make me feel better

regarding the option of cutting down, i have an on / off switch ... it's not a potentiometer

never having a drink again really is a scary prospect ... tough to put in to words

Fun Bus said:

I've been seeing a Psychotherapist privately for six months now and it's amazing how my drinking is more deep rooted than I thought.

this sounds quite attractive ... any thoughts on how i could make contact with someone local?

i can't even think what to google for

another day off ... went to the pub ... absolutely desparate

my wife is home now and we are openly talking about my situation and condition - i am a lucky man to have her by my side

got a liter of vod from the spar shop ... never ever imagined i'd be in this place

digger - i've not emailed you yet because i'm quite scared ... maybe later ... sorry

thanks again

[Digger]

Scared!? What of?

I don't bite.

[rock bottom]

thanks

just scared of baring my soul ... as it were

[Digger]

wisbechlad said:

Definitely go to see a doctor as well. DO NOT cold turkey alcohol before this. A small percentage of people get Delerium Tremens if they go cold turkey due to serotonin levels shooting up and frying their brain - happened to a colleague of mine. He saw blue devils. Unfortunately, did so much damage that even thiugh we got him to hospital, in the end he died.

Just to add that if taking the medicated route your GP should (as they did with me) refer you to a dedicated alcohol 'abuse' clinic. Which in my case was a trained alcohol nurse and a GP with a strong interest in helping 'alcoholics'.

DT's were of course a concern but a drug was offered to me to take for the first two days of detox. I forget the name. I informed the GP that i had stopped many times in the past without issue, so it was deemed un-necessary for me to take them. The first three days i had to attend the surgery to have the tablet administered to me, in part to check for any symptons & side-effects and that I was serious about starting the detox! For the record the only side-effect experienced was a very mild drowsiness.

[Big_Dog]

Don't underestimate a good psychotherapist. Would be my first step. You can take your wife with you to help.
yell.com is your friend for finding one. Go with somebody with some qualifications who practices CBT and maybe REMD.
They can help you get to know the sober you. You might even like him.
Wish you luck with it, I think you may have done the hard bit.

[Boshly]

I took a good friend of mine to his first AA meeting nearly ten years ago. He hasn't touched a drop since and has turned his life around tremendously (not just the drinking, the deep rooted cause).

They're not always successful but if you make the effort give it a good go, you've got a damn good chance of it working.

Recognising the problem is the first hurdle you've overcome and it sounds as if your partner is/can be a great support. You're on the right track, keep it going. Good luck.

[DukeDickson]

Why do you hit the bottle? Serious question.

You need to look on the mirror in a very naked way. If there's a reason why you're doing it then that's what you need to tackle first (rather than quack/AA). If you can't identify that other driver, the Dr/obvious support option is the way since it points to genuine addiction rather than comfort blanket.

If the former, you could quite easily get as much help here as anywhere else.

[Fun Bus]

rock bottom said:

never having a drink again really is a scary prospect ... tough to put in to words

It was for me and I used to get upset at the thought of it. I've not given up alcohol (other than a 4 week dry period whilst at the height of my drinking) but can say no to a drink now and keep my intake at a more moderate level whilst out. It does get better in time although you'll not be thinking that right now.

rock bottom said:

Fun Bus said:

I've been seeing a Psychotherapist privately for six months now and it's amazing how my drinking is more deep rooted than I thought.

this sounds quite attractive ... any thoughts on how i could make contact with someone local?

i can't even think what to google for

If you're in or near Nottingham I'll recommend who I'm seeing. Failing that put "Alcohol addiction counselling" or similar into Google along with your area of course.

I originally went to see my psychotherapist about my anger/rage. This would always be made worse with a drink. I was arrested and spent the night in a cell about a year ago - I was the last person you'd think that would happen to and the shame I felt for a long time after hit me hard - fortunately I just got an £80 FPN and no record. I've upset friends, embarrassed my (now) wife, fallen out with family and various other things and drink was to blame for all of them. I used to secretly drink too - and still did until recently. I'd regularly go to the bar for a round, order 2 of what I was drinking first and have one of them whilst the rest of the round was being served.

You'll get some good advice in here, don't be afraid to keep asking for it.

[happychap]

Can you identify what has changed, why are you at this point looking to reduce or stop drinking, this will be your motivation. You will need ongoing support to reduce or be abstinant from Alcohol. As for finding a therapist, go to British Association of Councillors and Pychotharapist BACP website and go to the section find a therapist.
You will also have services in your area that will offer you a service and support to achieve your goal.
Depending on your dailey intake, I would suggest you reduce your intake slowly, if you reduce your dailey intake by 1/2 a pint per day for a week, and continue this over a number of weeks it allows your body to adjust to the reduction rather then stopping altogether in one go, your body would go into shock if you stop completely in one go. Be under no illution, staying abstinant is a long term challenge that you will need support with. Keep your goals realistic, dont say you will not drink again, take each hour at a time, tell yourself you wont have a drink until lunch time, once that passess, tell yourself you wont drink until 3pm, this reduces the anxiety of thinking that you cant have a drink it also gives you a degree of control back. Good luck

[98elise]

Probably worth discussing it with work. It might mean they give you some leeway to sort your issues.

[Fun Bus]

happychap said:

Depending on your dailey intake, I would suggest you reduce your intake slowly, if you reduce your dailey intake by 1/2 a pint per day for a week

happychap said:

tell yourself you wont have a drink until lunch time, once that passess, tell yourself you wont drink until 3pm

We are all different, but from painful experience this is very difficult to achieve. I tried similar to all of the above, and more to manage my drinking but if it's accessible you still drink regardless. I even tried the "Nothing tonight" approach but still found myself having a drink. I sometimes used the "Only this many tonight" tactic and still drank more.

It's a scarily powerful addiction.

[happychap]

Fun Bus said:

We are all different, but from painful experience this is very difficult to achieve. I tried similar to all of the above, and more to manage my drinking but if it's accessible you still drink regardless. I even tried the "Nothing tonight" approach but still found myself having a drink. I sometimes used the "Only this many tonight" tactic and still drank more.

It's a scarily powerful addiction.

I have no dought at the challenge faced by anyone dependant on alcohol. The op needs to determine what his motivation is to change his behaviour and dependancy. As I pointed out, gradual reduction and support gives his body the opportunity to reduce his tolorance to alcohol. His dependancy will not happen over night, it takes time and commitment to continue his motivation to make the change and to take back control over the alcohol.
Alcohol services are available, but fundementaly change has to be motivated by the indevidual.

[rock bottom]

98elise said:

Probably worth discussing it with work. It might mean they give you some leeway to sort your issues.

good shout - thanks

it's complicated though ... not an option i'm afraid

dealing with it from a different angle but don't want to expand for fear of revealling identity

[rock bottom]

Fun Bus said:

... but if it's accessible you still drink regardless. I even tried the "Nothing tonight" approach but still found myself having a drink. I sometimes used the "Only this many tonight" tactic and still drank more.

this sounds alarmingly familiar

Fun Bus said:

It's a scarily powerful addiction.

i managed nicotene about a year ago (30+ years smoker) so hopefully that's on my side

[smileymikey]

Detox isn't very scary, Librium is usually used because it stimulates the same receptors in the brain as alcohol. This works to calm you down and reduce the shock from withdrawing alcohol from your system. I had been drinking around a bottle of vodka a day for a few years when I stopped and quite honestly struggled a lot more giving up cigarettes. AA gets mixed revues I thought I would hate it, but went every week for five years. I didn't agree with some of the attitudes but it helped me from slipping back to something really nasty so I stuck it out, the people there really do range from tramps to millionaires and the network you build up really does help you. You cant start working on your anxiety until you remove alcohol from the equation.

I would recommend setting the date for stopping ( and no not July 15 2023 )....and then in the best traditions of PH "man the fk up and get on with it"

Good Luck

[rock bottom]

Fun Bus said:

I was arrested and spent the night in a cell about a year ago - I was the last person you'd think that would happen to and the shame I felt for a long time after hit me hard - fortunately I just got an £80 FPN and no record.

wow!

this raised an eyebrow

when i get this all sorted, i'd really like to meet you (serious)

[ED209]

smileymikey said:

Detox isn't very scary, Librium is usually used because it stimulates the same receptors in the brain as alcohol. This works to calm you down and reduce the shock from withdrawing alcohol from your system. I had been drinking around a bottle of vodka a day for a few years when I stopped and quite honestly struggled a lot more giving up cigarettes. AA gets mixed revues I thought I would hate it, but went every week for five years. I didn't agree with some of the attitudes but it helped me from slipping back to something really nasty so I stuck it out, the people there really do range from tramps to millionaires and the network you build up really does help you. You cant start working on your anxiety until you remove alcohol from the equation.

I would recommend setting the date for stopping ( and no not July 15 2023 )....and then in the best traditions of PH "man the fk up and get on with it"

Good Luck

This may be difficult, simply stopping drinking for an alcoholic could kill them, I deal with a lot of people with serious drink and drug problems at work and i am always more worried about alcoholics going into withdrawl than hard drug users, Hard drug users may feel very ill but they wont die, a serious alcoholic with no drink all of a sudden can die from withdrawl.

I will hold my hands up and say i drink too much, I rarely get drunk but a few beers most days. I know I shouldnt but i enjoy it, i have felt before that i have been on a slippery slope. It has never affected me going to work though, I wont drink when i have to drive to work early on a morning and each set of 3/4 nights i do means i go a few days with no drink at all every couple of weeks.

[GT03ROB]

As others have said, having the courage to recognise you have the problem is the 1st step. With the support of you wife as well you will sort this.

It's a fine line between being an alcoholic & just drinking to much, but the solutions are radically different.

Good luck.

[Fun Bus]

rock bottom said:

Fun Bus said:

I was arrested and spent the night in a cell about a year ago - I was the last person you'd think that would happen to and the shame I felt for a long time after hit me hard - fortunately I just got an £80 FPN and no record.

wow!

this raised an eyebrow

when i get this all sorted, i'd really like to meet you (serious)

My arrest was a massive low for me. It made me realise my problem with drink was still there and still causing me problems. I kept it a secret for a long time as I was so gutted by it.

Fast forward to now though - went for some drinks with my wife last night and on two occasions I declined alcohol in favour of a soft drink. Some people may say 'big deal' but to me it was something I never used to do as it used to be all about getting as much alcohol as possible as quickly as I could.