Maybe it's just your complaints procedure that needs work

Any of those 3 issues would result in a complaint from me too. The trick, as you say, is complain positively, get the issue sorted and then move on and enjoy.

I think, considering the huge progress you're making, it would be beyond human not to have little 'setbacks' along the way. If those are irritability or a little 'fog' now and again, I'd say that's a result!

No need to beat yourself up chap - happens to the best of us

Hi Rb, Good to hear you are having a good weekend.
I would just like to congratulate you on your first month of recovery. Your commitment to this process re affirms my belief that if we decide to make chamges, then this can be done with support and any change can be achieved.
It would be amiss of me not to mention the support that your partner continues to make available to you, this I'm sure has helped you no end, and will be there long after this thread. Having said that, I hope you are still finding this thread usefull and continue to post. Regards

steady on folks - i'm just a bloke

i don't think i'm special in any way in terms of defining where i want to be in my head and in my relationships

i also think it's healthy to strive to acheive what you've decided on as quickly and efficiently as you can

i'm not beating myself up over the 'humps' - i'm learning from them

... actually, scrub that ... if i start a sect, will you join and give me all your money?

[light hearted]

i got a wee bit grumpy again this afternoon - two things ...

first was ginetta driver ... who "shoulda gone to specsavers"

second was finding out i wasn't getting prawn madras for tea ... chicken en bleedin croute ... my foot

then i fely much better seeing that wee rascal shedded with more turf on his intercooler than i've got on my garden

[/light hearted]

regardin posting here, i honestly have still been worrying that it's a bit self indulgent

given the votes of confidence above however, i'll carry on until someone tells me to shut-up or my right index finger is a bloody stump

thanks again and have a nice sunday evening

heading out to a meeting now

Great reading RB, your wife sounds like a gem

thanks - and yes, you're right

i'll never ever again take it for granted that she'll be there to pick up the ieces when i screw up

saying that, if the plan comes together, there should be no need

i am a lucky lucky man

I have been following this thread from the beginning and would like to add a few of my thoughts if I may.

Firstly RB, fantastic job! You have acknowledged there is a problem and are doing something very positive about it. You mentioned that you feel a little "self indulgent" in your postings. I, like many others reading this thread are inspired by your brutal honesty and determination to see this through and urge you to carry on with your postings.

I drink more than I should, a bottle of wine most nights and mayble a couple on a weekend night. A couple of weeks ago shortly after you started this thread there was the Perseid Meteor shower. My 15 year daughter wanted to see this on the Saturday night/ early hours of Sunday morning. I can't remember the last Saturday that I didn't drink but am pretty certain it is not in this Millenium. I thought about you and this thread while trying to work out how I could still get my Saturday fix but yet see the shower. I decided to research the best place to see the meteors from and ended up not drinking but driving round the countryside to the best view points in the very early hours of the Sunday morning. We had a fabulous evening and saw dozens of meteorites, that probably wouldnt have happened if I hadn't seen this thread.

Since then I have really taken stock of life and my priorities. I have cut my alcohol intake down by about 75% and this weekend have decided to quit smoking. Today is my first fag free day and I am feeling confident about my chances of stopping.


You say you are not special, maybe you're not but you have shown guts and bravery in bearing your soul and I bet I am not the only one who has taken stock of their own habits and have made a change to their lives because of this thread. For that I am very grateful to you.

Keep up the good work.

Ha ha! Sorry to do that to you! they're not bad are they!

i'm enjoying the thread - keep it up RB!

i'm a tad ashamed to admit what i've been doing for a good part of today

there's one thing neither my wife nor i can abide - and that's ironing

the solution is that we have it done for us (collected and delivered)

shirts come back on wire hangers

now, we're not too clever about giving the hangers back

as a result, before too long, wardrobe space decreases to an unmanageable degree

so, having picked up on a subtle hint, i decided to address the issue today

now, i didn't want to hand them back in a higglety-pigglety mass as they're a nightmare to handle once they're all hooked up

so, to make it easier for the ironing ladies, i decided to bundle them all up in neat bunches of 25

et voilà, here are 440 hangers all neatly bundled



now, before anyone says it, i know 25 doesn't go into 440 - there are some bunches of 20

... i'm beginning to think i should perhaps start thinking about getting back to work ...

my best pal came round for a cup of tea this afternoon

that was really good as he's been away with work

the main topic of conversation was the optimum flooring solution for the workshop we share - perfect

right, nice free range chook in the oven so i'm off to the gym

then ... home / shower / eat / aa / home / cup of tea / tv & sweeties / bed

enjoy your evening folks

morning* hc - doing great thanks - thanks for thinking about me

* it'll likely be afternoon by the time i hit the submit button

went to a meeting last night - tuesdays are great and i've declared this as me 'home group'

this has various levels of significance but the big one, for me, is that if you're unable to attend, you must let someone know

if you don't show up for your 'home group' one week, major efforts will be made to establish if you're ok or you need help

that's a great thing

last night, in my mini share, i spoke about the friendship i've found in aa already and how i feel so welcome and comfortable

some of the stories i've heard of people's pasts and backgrounds are absolutely wild - honestly; seriously eye opening stuff

i explained that i come from what i consider to be a privileged background

stable childhood, private education, good career and flying high prior to the wheels coming off (apologies for the oxymoron)

i told everyone (there are probably about 20 come on a tuesday) that i have more in common with everyone in that room than i do with any "old school tie" or executive in the industry i (used to) work in

that's honestly how i feel about the fellowship - and it's a good thing

it's like it's exactly contrary to my favourite groucho marx quote; "i don't want to belong to any club that will accept people like me as a member"

some odd thoughts are beginning to creep in to my head

things are so good just now, the bubble has to burst

sounds pessimistic i'm sure but i can't help it

life is easy just now as the only bits of the outside world i'm dealing with are of my choosing

when i decide to start working again, i think i'm going to have to have someone lined up to look after me if things get too much

i'm going to addaction next week for that appointment but, right now, i think this is best going to take the form of an aa sponsor

i have a couple of people in mind to ask but i'm going to leave it for a wee while

waiting for the dog walker lady to come and then i'm off down the gym

more later maybe

I've been reading this thread throughout, but didn't feel I could post. I was going to try to respond tonight with some advice related to the bubble bursting and the return to work, but it was either my experience or patronising.

All I can say is head up RB, I am only one of the many rooting for you here and thinking of you.
You may think you are just an ordinary chap, but you are taking the hard road - which is hugely impressive.