alcoholism advice

[rock bottom]

always been a heavy drinker since teens (late forties now)

last five or so years, things have spiralled

in recent months something happened which confined me to the house

the bottle seemed preferable to the boredom

i have returned to work but can’t cope with the outside world – i need a drink to prepare me

i am having more days off than i am managing to get to work

i reckon i will be sacked soon and, astonishingly, this realisation is not changing my behaviour

not facing financial disaster but things are going to be difficult

i have shared all of my thoughts with my wife (of 20+ years) – she couldn’t be more supportive

so, i need to get this sorted before it kills me or ruins me

i don’t know who to turn to

i looked at AA but fear the meetings may be so squalid that i won’t want to continue

i can’t afford a private rehab facility

anyone been in this place who could give me a steer?

the wheels are coming off and i’m pretty much at my wits end

thanks for reading

[daz3210]

Have you spoken with your doctor? They can point you in the direction of help.

Don't fear AA, Mum has a cousin who went through it, they are not the places you imagine, they also give you numbers who you can ring when you feel you need a drink. The AA meets are not just for you, but your family can go too.

Give it a try, but I think you just made the first step of realising you have a problem.

[birdcage]

You get all sorts at AA I imagine from the destitute to the gentry.

Surprised the wife isn't making you go, it's a tried and tested method for those with a reasonably rationable thought process (like yours it seems) to become dry and stay dry.

[Munter]

Got time for a holiday? http://www.soberholidays.ie/

I'm not suggesting it's a cure. But 2 weeks with no access to it might help reset the brain into realising you don't need it to face the day.

[K77 CTR]

You have made the first step by realising you have a problem and wanting to do something about it.

There is a huge investment at the moment in alcohol services so I'm certain that AA and private rehab are not all that's available in your area.

Speak to your GP who will direct you to the right places. If you don't want to speak to your doctor then the surgery will probably have leaflets or even the CAB.

Good luck

[SirSamuelBuca]

you will get over it when your ready. its tough and like anything to do with depression/anxiety addiction etc only you can bring yourself out of it.

maybe try some self help like the linden method (might not be tailored to you but a great self help book, you can dl it if you know what i mean)

get to your doctor and drag yourself to AA.

[Digger]

Go to GP to have a chat about it. I was in a similar situation to you & knew exactly what i wanted. I wanted to take the medicated route via Antabuse/Disulfiram. It worked brilliantly for three & a half months, until i lapsed. 6 months is the suggested minimum, so that patterns of behaviour are seen to change. If this were to be the option you take on then your wife will play a big part, in both administering the meds as well as checking that you remain dry throughout. You are very lucky to have such a supportive & understanding lady by your side!

There are of course other methods, but your drinking appears heavily engrained, and i am not sure moderation would work in your situation?

Best of Luck though.

eta - AA didnt work for me tbh. I probably needed to try other meetings to find one more 'suitable'. It seemed to have an almost spiritual atmosphere, rather than a practical outlook. Most odd.

Edited by Digger on Friday 27th July 14:48

[MrMoonyMan]

Nothing useful to add I'm afraid.

Just wanted to say well done for posting in here. It's a first step, and that's good.

[Davel]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Wot he said!

Good luck to you!

[Ilikebeaver]

i would say to definitly try the meetings.

They will be people like you.

Alcoholism can be quite a problem in certain high stress jobs, and you might find people such as Pilots, Oil Rig workers , stay at home Mothers/Wives of business men, and other members of the public who you wouldnt have given a second thought to of being in an AA meeting.

They will never be as bad as you think.

Plus you get free tea and biscuits

Good luck, the hard bit is admitting there is a problem.

[Digger]

Ilikebeaver said:

Plus you get free tea and biscuits.

When i went we were gently prompted to cough up!

[rock bottom]

thanks all

going to try an AA meeting on wednesday evening

hangovers used to be a sore head and feeling sick

now they are a day long bought of anxiety with full on panic attacks … so there’s always an easy solution

i’ll post here to let you know how i get on

i really do appreciate your guidance and i actually feel that i’m about to embark on a difficult but rewarding journey

the irony is that i’m so buoyed up that it makes total sense for me to nip down the pub for a couple of vodkas

i am sure this will sound like madness to most but please don’t judge

thanks again

[rock bottom]

digger - would you mind if i emailed you?

[Digger]

rock bottom said:

digger - would you mind if i emailed you?

Of course not. Go for it.

[SirSamuelBuca]

If you are getting anxiety then DEFINITELY invest in the Linden Method I cannot thank this book enough seriously it will change your life

all the best mate!

[Jamie VTS]

Good luck! It will be a long hard road but with the support of your friends and family I am sure you will do it!

[2.5pi]

Firstly I know nothing however...


You could start with baby steps;

Eg no spirits, no drinking before 6 pm or after 10.30 pm?

Best route to reducing intake is exercise , you can't combine alcoholism and sport very easily.

Best of luck and keep posting

Best

2.5pi

[Engineer1]

2.5pi said:

Best route to reducing intake is exercise , you can't combine alcoholism and sport very easily.

But you can play a sport where the bar is as big a part of the event as the bit on the pitch or course. Golf and the 19th hole, and rugby and it's post game drinking, if you are trying the sport approach go for something with a clean living reputation.

[StevieBee]

In my 45 years, I've known 4 close friends and family to have suffered from alcoholism.

2 are completely reformed and lead normal, healthy and very rewarding lives.

1 is on on his way.

1 we buried in March. He was the only one that denied he had a problem, even that he drunk more than he should, right to the end.

The fact that you have so openly admitted your dependancy demonstrates beyond doubt your journey will be rewarding, fruitful and successful.

Good luck!

[Fun Bus]

2.5pi said:

You could start with baby steps;

Eg no spirits, no drinking before 6 pm or after 10.30 pm?

Self moderation is extremely difficult in my experience. I tried everything to try and 'control' my drinking but found excuses not to everytime.

OP, some great advice so far. I'm 34 and have had a bad relationship with alcohol for longer than I care to remember. AA worked for me but then it just stopped working for me. I've been seeing a Psychotherapist privately for six months now and it's amazing how my drinking is more deep rooted than I thought. It's working though and I'm managing my dependency more than ever before.

Talking is an excellent form of therapy.