Discussion
Just hang on in there & give all the support you can. Nothing I else I can really say.
Good luck with any test results, The waiting is the hardest part & any support you give will be appreciated
The breast cancer care helpline are a fantastic source of support & advice.
http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/
Pm if I can help other half has been through it.
Good luck with any test results, The waiting is the hardest part & any support you give will be appreciated
The breast cancer care helpline are a fantastic source of support & advice.
http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/
Pm if I can help other half has been through it.
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Killer2005 said:
and the doctor thinks it could be breast cancer.
It could be, and it could be nothing of the kind. Not an expert but I don't think you can diagnose cancer from a mammogram. You need to take a biopsy. Most lumps are not breast cancer, they're something benign.She doesnt get results back until next week, so I've been trying to keep her positive at least until the results come back
Killer2005 said:
Neglected to add in the my initial post, but biopsy was done yesterday too. It was after this the doctor said it didnt look too good.
That doesn't sound like a very good doctor to me. He should wait for the results before passing comment either way. To say "it doesn't look great" or "it looks fine" when he doesn't actually know, I can't see the point in that. Could easily get someone's hopes up or send them into a spiral of despair for no reason.I think I'm probably the PH breast cancer expert, having secondaries myself. First, just to confirm what others have said, most lumps bumps etc aren't cancerous. The fact they biopsied and the doctor said not good - was it a needle biopsy in which case an experienced doc will have a good idea from the fluid? Or a core biopsy, when equally the ultrasound under which they do it can give a pretty good idea - I was told similar when they found my tumour and it helped prepare me - and if it's good news then OK you've had a week of hell but can celebrate at the end.
Also to confirm, it is very survivable - I'm not a good role model having secondaries (treatable for now but not curable and will 'get you' in the end). When I was first diagnosed I met and heard of lots of survivors. Those I know who haven't done so were a few years back and the range of treatments available has expanded dramatically recently.
A word of warning about DCIS and LCIS - yes they're not cancerous of the type that will kill you yet, early indicators, but can still involve mastectomy sometimes to remove so that's pretty traumatic - I'm sure the poster who mentioned these was well intentioned but obviously not a woman for whom the potential loss of a breast's a pretty awful prospect!!
Hope not but if it is cancer, you may have up to year of treatment regimes to face. Chemo can be used before surgery depending on size of tumour to try and shrink, or after surgery, or in some cases not at all. Usually for primaries it's either FEC or FEC T if lymph nodes are involved. 6 cycles of FEC are do-able, she will lose her hair unless she uses the cold cap - a truly awful device but I kept a reasonable covering of hair by persevering which was important for me. It will make her sick but there are lots of different drugs to help this - is just a question of finding the right one. It will make her constipated - catch it quick else it's agony!! It will make her tired, but after about a week of the infusion she'll be feeling a bit better. T(axotere) is a b
d tho - it crucified me and does most people - total fatigue - can't lift your head off the pillow fatigue - thrush everywhere you can get it, taste buds that go bananas, potential nails falling off, aches, bad aches - yes, it's do-able but it's not easy. The Macmillan website gives a clinical summary of the different chemos and the breast cancer care provide leaflets which are a little less clinical.
There will be surgery, either lump removal or mastectomy and maybe lymph node removal. Surgery is actually the easiest part, tho you don't think so at the time! There will also be radiotherapy - at least 15 doses daily then up to 8 boosters. This varies - it can 'skin' you which is damned sore, and can make you tired, tho' sometimes I think this was as much due to the trudge to hospital daily as the therapy itself. I've since had palliative rads and they did knock the stuffing out of me but that was a different area and dose.
Depending on the pathology of the tumour, she may be found to have a cancer which likes hormones. In which case she'll get hormone therapy for quite a few years. this is one of the main weapons in the armoury. There are about 5 different variations, all have similar side effects to menopause plus aching joints but to varying degrees and they can change you around to which suits you best. Not the greatest of fun, but OK and you get used to it - I had a really bad reaction to one which is generally well tolerated, but coped fine with 2 others which many complain about so horses for courses.
There's also herceptin responsive cancers - there are about 10 or so different types of breast cancer not just one! Herceptin will come into play if necessary towards the end of treatment and makes it a bit longer. It has very good feedback in terms of results - herceptin receptive cancers are sometimes viewed as more aggressive but the up side to that is if you make 5 years after diagnosis you're generally a lot less likely for recurrence than others!
You. If you're still reading you are going to suffer! She'll be crabby unreasonably and know it but take it out on her nearest and dearest - we all do that - sorry! She'll cry. She'll get black moods. She'll be in physical discomfort at times. She won't want to talk about it, she'll talk incessantly about it. Forget sex!! She'll need assurance she's not physically repulsive after surgery whatever it is. The hormone pills will likely mean you wake in a nice wet sheets from night sweats. Depressed all ready? Sorry!! Have a look at the breast cancer care forum - it's in a mess at the moment due to having inexperienced drupal developers play with it but there's a section for other halves which altho I don't think anyone's used recently, does have some good feedback about what you can expect and do to help. I was told during chemo to 'plan nothing and expect anything' which was pretty good advice - but I think it holds equally well for OHs!
Good luck and I sincerely hope none of above proves to be useful due to good news next week!
Nina
Also to confirm, it is very survivable - I'm not a good role model having secondaries (treatable for now but not curable and will 'get you' in the end). When I was first diagnosed I met and heard of lots of survivors. Those I know who haven't done so were a few years back and the range of treatments available has expanded dramatically recently.
A word of warning about DCIS and LCIS - yes they're not cancerous of the type that will kill you yet, early indicators, but can still involve mastectomy sometimes to remove so that's pretty traumatic - I'm sure the poster who mentioned these was well intentioned but obviously not a woman for whom the potential loss of a breast's a pretty awful prospect!!
Hope not but if it is cancer, you may have up to year of treatment regimes to face. Chemo can be used before surgery depending on size of tumour to try and shrink, or after surgery, or in some cases not at all. Usually for primaries it's either FEC or FEC T if lymph nodes are involved. 6 cycles of FEC are do-able, she will lose her hair unless she uses the cold cap - a truly awful device but I kept a reasonable covering of hair by persevering which was important for me. It will make her sick but there are lots of different drugs to help this - is just a question of finding the right one. It will make her constipated - catch it quick else it's agony!! It will make her tired, but after about a week of the infusion she'll be feeling a bit better. T(axotere) is a b
d tho - it crucified me and does most people - total fatigue - can't lift your head off the pillow fatigue - thrush everywhere you can get it, taste buds that go bananas, potential nails falling off, aches, bad aches - yes, it's do-able but it's not easy. The Macmillan website gives a clinical summary of the different chemos and the breast cancer care provide leaflets which are a little less clinical. There will be surgery, either lump removal or mastectomy and maybe lymph node removal. Surgery is actually the easiest part, tho you don't think so at the time! There will also be radiotherapy - at least 15 doses daily then up to 8 boosters. This varies - it can 'skin' you which is damned sore, and can make you tired, tho' sometimes I think this was as much due to the trudge to hospital daily as the therapy itself. I've since had palliative rads and they did knock the stuffing out of me but that was a different area and dose.
Depending on the pathology of the tumour, she may be found to have a cancer which likes hormones. In which case she'll get hormone therapy for quite a few years. this is one of the main weapons in the armoury. There are about 5 different variations, all have similar side effects to menopause plus aching joints but to varying degrees and they can change you around to which suits you best. Not the greatest of fun, but OK and you get used to it - I had a really bad reaction to one which is generally well tolerated, but coped fine with 2 others which many complain about so horses for courses.
There's also herceptin responsive cancers - there are about 10 or so different types of breast cancer not just one! Herceptin will come into play if necessary towards the end of treatment and makes it a bit longer. It has very good feedback in terms of results - herceptin receptive cancers are sometimes viewed as more aggressive but the up side to that is if you make 5 years after diagnosis you're generally a lot less likely for recurrence than others!
You. If you're still reading you are going to suffer! She'll be crabby unreasonably and know it but take it out on her nearest and dearest - we all do that - sorry! She'll cry. She'll get black moods. She'll be in physical discomfort at times. She won't want to talk about it, she'll talk incessantly about it. Forget sex!! She'll need assurance she's not physically repulsive after surgery whatever it is. The hormone pills will likely mean you wake in a nice wet sheets from night sweats. Depressed all ready? Sorry!! Have a look at the breast cancer care forum - it's in a mess at the moment due to having inexperienced drupal developers play with it but there's a section for other halves which altho I don't think anyone's used recently, does have some good feedback about what you can expect and do to help. I was told during chemo to 'plan nothing and expect anything' which was pretty good advice - but I think it holds equally well for OHs!
Good luck and I sincerely hope none of above proves to be useful due to good news next week!
Nina
How old is the woman in question? Is she menopausal? Is there a family history? All relevant. Broomstick Lady I admire your courage and candour. In situ tumours that are truly early stage and low grade can be cured IFAIC, but you're right they should not be regarded lightly. I have a family member with first hand experience...
Clutching at straws, maybe, but Professor Jane Plant has some interesting thoughts on dairy food and IGF1 (insulin-like growth factor). Her book 'Your Life in Your Hands' is a bit Daily Mail in style, but talks a lot of sense. When it was written women in Western society had a 1:10 chance of contracting the disease. In rural China it was (then) 1:10,000. The difference? No dairy industry in China at the time (late 1990s). Chinese women in USA are as susceptible as caucasian women so it's not genetic. Prostate cancer figures are similarly indicative of dairy being at fault. I'm not an advocate, merely a reporter of my studies.
Clutching at straws, maybe, but Professor Jane Plant has some interesting thoughts on dairy food and IGF1 (insulin-like growth factor). Her book 'Your Life in Your Hands' is a bit Daily Mail in style, but talks a lot of sense. When it was written women in Western society had a 1:10 chance of contracting the disease. In rural China it was (then) 1:10,000. The difference? No dairy industry in China at the time (late 1990s). Chinese women in USA are as susceptible as caucasian women so it's not genetic. Prostate cancer figures are similarly indicative of dairy being at fault. I'm not an advocate, merely a reporter of my studies.
OP, hope it all works out for you. I just wanted to add my bit:
My wife was diagnosis with DCIS last year. She underwent a (successful) lumpectomy.
Also, radiotherapy has it's own risks: angina plus burnt and sore skin (which you should for the rest of your life either keep covered up or cover with the highest factor sunscreen). They also admitted that the current radiotherapy is a new, modern system which *might* have a lower chance of angina (and other possible heart damage) but also *might* flag up some other nasty in 20/30/40 years time. Unknown.
We went to the first appointment, and my wife had a long chat to the specialist there. She agreed the 25/75% figure.
My wife decided NOT to undertake the therapy. A few months later, she had another appointment and was given the all clear. In her case (and in 3 out of 4 cases, based on what we were told), she has avoided the risk of heart damage and burnt/sore skin which would have been for nowt.
I know every case is individual but everyone should question whether or not they should have radiotherapy and not just do it because "it is part of the treatment".
My wife was diagnosis with DCIS last year. She underwent a (successful) lumpectomy.
Broomsticklady said:
Surgery is actually the easiest part, tho you don't think so at the time! There will also be radiotherapy - at least 15 doses daily then up to 8 boosters. This varies - it can 'skin' you which is damned sore, and can make you tired, tho' sometimes I think this was as much due to the trudge to hospital daily as the therapy itself. I've since had palliative rads and they did knock the stuffing out of me but that was a different area and dose.
I would just like to add something. As part of the treatment, my wife was "told" it included radiotherapy. No discussions, just: you had to do it. We investigate further and found out that, without radiotherapy, there was a 25% chance of the cancer still being there/coming back. In other words, there was a 75% chance that radiotherapy would be worthless/pointless.Also, radiotherapy has it's own risks: angina plus burnt and sore skin (which you should for the rest of your life either keep covered up or cover with the highest factor sunscreen). They also admitted that the current radiotherapy is a new, modern system which *might* have a lower chance of angina (and other possible heart damage) but also *might* flag up some other nasty in 20/30/40 years time. Unknown.
We went to the first appointment, and my wife had a long chat to the specialist there. She agreed the 25/75% figure.
My wife decided NOT to undertake the therapy. A few months later, she had another appointment and was given the all clear. In her case (and in 3 out of 4 cases, based on what we were told), she has avoided the risk of heart damage and burnt/sore skin which would have been for nowt.
I know every case is individual but everyone should question whether or not they should have radiotherapy and not just do it because "it is part of the treatment".
JumboBeef said:
OP, hope it all works out for you. I just wanted to add my bit:
My wife was diagnosis with DCIS last year. She underwent a (successful) lumpectomy.
I would just like to add something. As part of the treatment, my wife was "told" it included radiotherapy. No discussions, just: you had to do it. We investigate further and found out that, without radiotherapy, there was a 25% chance of the cancer still being there/coming back. In other words, there was a 75% chance that radiotherapy would be worthless/pointless.
Also, radiotherapy has it's own risks: angina plus burnt and sore skin (which you should for the rest of your life either keep covered up or cover with the highest factor sunscreen). They also admitted that the current radiotherapy is a new, modern system which *might* have a lower chance of angina (and other possible heart damage) but also *might* flag up some other nasty in 20/30/40 years time. Unknown.
A few months later, she had another appointment and was given the all clear. In her case (and in 3 out of 4 cases, based on what we were told), she has avoided the risk of heart damage and burnt/sore skin which would have been for nowt.
I know every case is individual but everyone should question whether or not they should have radiotherapy and not just do it because "it is part of the treatment".
With respect, your wife was very 'lucky' her problem was found to be DCIS. This is a very early form of cancer, and its risk factor is so low that things like critical illness do not pay out for it. Many of the public figures like Martina Navratilova have had this rather than full blown breast cancer, and a lot is made of the fantastic recovery they make and how they are now all clear. To compare this with anyone with full blown breast cancer, who will NEVER get an all clear - it can return many years later, this is a very - dare I say - tunnel visioned view. My wife was diagnosis with DCIS last year. She underwent a (successful) lumpectomy.
I would just like to add something. As part of the treatment, my wife was "told" it included radiotherapy. No discussions, just: you had to do it. We investigate further and found out that, without radiotherapy, there was a 25% chance of the cancer still being there/coming back. In other words, there was a 75% chance that radiotherapy would be worthless/pointless.
Also, radiotherapy has it's own risks: angina plus burnt and sore skin (which you should for the rest of your life either keep covered up or cover with the highest factor sunscreen). They also admitted that the current radiotherapy is a new, modern system which *might* have a lower chance of angina (and other possible heart damage) but also *might* flag up some other nasty in 20/30/40 years time. Unknown.
A few months later, she had another appointment and was given the all clear. In her case (and in 3 out of 4 cases, based on what we were told), she has avoided the risk of heart damage and burnt/sore skin which would have been for nowt.
I know every case is individual but everyone should question whether or not they should have radiotherapy and not just do it because "it is part of the treatment".
I'm trying to be very careful and tactful here, and I do appreciate the points that some oncologists will try to rail road you down a particular course of action, and you should make your own research, but to 'dis' one of the most effective tools against recurrence, quoting stats referring to a small minority of cases, is so wrong. Rads are also the most effective resolution to secondary cancer pain - please don't put just emphasise the down side and put people off - we have enough fears as it is. Any treatment has risks - the general anaesthetic your wife undertook to have her lumpectomy did - did you suggest she avoid that risk by having a local?!
The primary radiotherapy I undertook changed my 5 year survival rate from about 50% to 66%, a considerable improvement, tho' as it turns out, the cancer recurred and all bets are off - it's going to win at some point. I was knocked out before undertaking palliative rads earlier this year by having to take 120 mg oxycodone (morphine) daily and that didn't control my pain - now I'm off morphine completely for now.
I wish you and your wife well for the future, just don't think yours is a typical breast cancer experience - mine isn't either, but is worse rather than better than most peoples'.
Remember that she doesn't have to feel alone going through this. There's usually a Macmillan Centre attached to the hospital with various therapists and support groups.
http://www.macmillan.org.uk/HowWeCanHelp/LocalInfo...
So sorry another lady has had to join our 'club'. They're acting quickly which is good, and altho losing nodes brings another lot of hassle in form of lymphodeomia hazards, the primary escape route for the cancer is now shut off which is good.
Best of luck to both of you. I'd recommend the Breast cancercare forums and another called bcpals for your lady, and the BCC has a section for OHs who are welcomed, advised and sympathised with by people who know what they put their partners thru, so can give good advice.
Nina
Best of luck to both of you. I'd recommend the Breast cancercare forums and another called bcpals for your lady, and the BCC has a section for OHs who are welcomed, advised and sympathised with by people who know what they put their partners thru, so can give good advice.
Nina
Killer2005 said:
Just an update, she had results on monday, and confirmed as cancer. She had masectomy this morning, along with removal of the lymph nodes.
Going to be a long one
Sorry to hear - my other half was diagnosed in January this year. Grade 2 invasive duct carcinoma. Same surgery and she's just finished her radiotherapy having previously had 8 rounds of chemo as there was minor lymph node involvement. Oh, and she was 6 months pregnant at the time...Going to be a long one
NHS was fabulous during the diagnosis and although we've used BUPA, she's essentially seen the same people and had the same treatments as she would have on the NHS. We were incredibly lucky with how easy she found the chemo and radio (though she was at the lower end of the scale for both given the tumor had been completely resected).
One more (bone) scan to come but looks like she's clear for now. And a couple months on from the chemo she's as healthy and vigorous as I've seen her in the last few years. Fingers crossed things stay that way, not least of all because we added a baby girl to the family in March (to go with her big brother).
It's going to be a tough few months. Be strong for her but don't forget to look after yourself. If I regret anything over the last six months it's perhaps that I didn't step out and take some time for me to work through what's happened. Ironically I find that now the treatment is over, I'm perhaps finding it harder than I did before. Though the same is true in a way for the mrs.
It's a horrendous disease that strikes seemingly at random but the treatments have come on hugely over the last few years. Don't let her get hung up on the numbers, they aren't specific to her and only represent a guide at best. Use the internet wisely - by all means read around the treatment and the diagnosis but you see only the extremes online.
PM me if you want to discuss anything - happy to help if I can.
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