Effing cancer is an effing effer, frankly

[FlyingMeeces]

Cancer is an absolute stter and I am very sorry.

If you guys are not currently receiving support from a hospice, now's the time to kick that into gear - that includes if he doesn't want at present to use any inpatient service, they all have some form of at-home support setup too.

Wishing the absolute best to both of you.

[motco]

FlyingMeeces said:

Cancer is an absolute stter and I am very sorry.

If you guys are not currently receiving support from a hospice, now's the time to kick that into gear - that includes if he doesn't want at present to use any inpatient service, they all have some form of at-home support setup too.

Wishing the absolute best to both of you.

I can second the hospice at home suggestion. My late sister-in-law had a terminal cancer in 2014 and her last weeks and days were wonderfully supported by this service in Shropshire.

[ali_kat]

Stomach cancer is evil, I'm so very sorry

There is an breast cancer drug that is showing in trials as effective in slowing it down that they used on Mum, have a chat with your Oncologist

Please, get in touch with your local Hospice as FlyingMeeces & motco suggested; they can help you cope through this, at home or in the Hospice (I recommend a room if you can get one, that way you get some rest too - most will let you sleep in the room with him when you want to)

[anonymous-user]

Sorry to hear that Jenny / black flag. I hope it goes as well as it can for you and your hubby, but it is going to be ste for you both.


I have taken some great satisfaction chopping logs today. Released a lot of pent up feelings of all sorts. Therapy.

[davetripletvr]

Well, i was involved in a motorcycle accident 3 weeks ago. Shattered fibia and tibia and possible broken wrists and shoulder as well as cuts and bad bruising as you can imagine. So they did a full C.T. scan to check on what else is damaged, anyway was told i had a mass on my kidney and would get an appointment for tests or whatever they do.
Appointment came through for 18th August, on Monday night i lost a good friend age 55 who had been battling with asbestosis and cancer for the last 10 months and what a good man he was. I go to my appointment at the Urology clinic, Cancer centre to be told i have Cancer in my Kidney, so not only trying to deal with my leg i now have to look forward to what's called a Open Partial Nephrectomy, which basically means they are going to take half of my kidney away as long as the rest is salvageable.
The thing is though, if i didn't have the bike accident i would never have known about the cancer until it was possibly too late. That is my way of looking at this in a positive way.

[motco]

davetripletvr said:

Well, i was involved in a motorcycle accident 3 weeks ago. Shattered fibia and tibia and possible broken wrists and shoulder as well as cuts and bad bruising as you can imagine. So they did a full C.T. scan to check on what else is damaged, anyway was told i had a mass on my kidney and would get an appointment for tests or whatever they do.
Appointment came through for 18th August, on Monday night i lost a good friend age 55 who had been battling with asbestosis and cancer for the last 10 months and what a good man he was. I go to my appointment at the Urology clinic, Cancer centre to be told i have Cancer in my Kidney, so not only trying to deal with my leg i now have to look forward to what's called a Open Partial Nephrectomy, which basically means they are going to take half of my kidney away as long as the rest is salvageable.
The thing is though, if i didn't have the bike accident i would never have known about the cancer until it was possibly too late. That is my way of looking at this in a positive way.

That is very positive! The wife of an old work colleague of mine went in for a gynaecological procedure and the surgeons found a kidney tumour. They excised it and she survived. Without the original op she would be long dead. It's good fortune, bettered only by not having the tumour in the first place. Chin up Old Bean - unless that hurts!

[Gruffy]

Many thanks for the generous PH support during my race. Together we smashed my £10k target and I'm proud to say we're currently at £11,260 raised for Cancer Research UK. I'm now working on the blog write-ups for each day of the race and I'm hoping these will lead to a few more donations. That's a meaningful chunk of change. Thank you so much.
https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/TheAdventur...

[PomBstard]

Gruffy said:

Many thanks for the generous PH support during my race. Together we smashed my £10k target and I'm proud to say we're currently at £11,260 raised for Cancer Research UK. I'm now working on the blog write-ups for each day of the race and I'm hoping these will lead to a few more donations. That's a meaningful chunk of change. Thank you so much.
https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/TheAdventur...

Just caught up with what this is all about - fantastic achievement, am in awe, well done - looking forward to the write ups.

[Carlton Banks]

I have wanted to contribute to this thread for a while but never can.

My father was diagnosed last year with a malignant brain tumour that was inoperable.

He went through chemo, radiotherapy and immunotherapy and was doing well for 10 months, then he had a grand mal seizure and he has been downhill since

He also lost his own mother but this happened whilst they were both in hospital (at different ends of the world) and that really shattered him. His mum (my gran) was his world.

However, he still is in good spirits despite all of this.

Going from a man who ran marathons to one who can't walk himself to the bathroom is such a sad sight but we are doing our best and 16months on he is still with us.

All I can say is that get as much help as you can as the hardest thing to cope with other than seeing a loved one suffer is the suffering for the other family members like my mother, sister and siblings

Anyway, best wishes to all and this disease robs people of their lives and independence in the cruelest way imaginable.

[Black Flag]

motco said:

FlyingMeeces said:

Cancer is an absolute stter and I am very sorry.

If you guys are not currently receiving support from a hospice, now's the time to kick that into gear - that includes if he doesn't want at present to use any inpatient service, they all have some form of at-home support setup too.

Wishing the absolute best to both of you.

I can second the hospice at home suggestion. My late sister-in-law had a terminal cancer in 2014 and her last weeks and days were wonderfully supported by this service in Shropshire.

Thank you all for your kind words, it really does bring some comfort. We are at last getting some support from Macmillan and district nurses and know where to turn when help is needed. The pain management is the important thing at present and they seem to be dealing with that well. Hospice care has been discussed and is there when needed.

[don4l]

Black Flag said:

I have started to write a post on here several times but always end up deleting it. I am finding this hard to share but think I need to.
My husband was diagnosed with terminal Esophageal cancer last October and I felt like my world had ended. It had already spread through the lymph nodes to his chest. No operation was possible because of the stage and only chemo and radio therapy was offered. They gave him 3 to 6 months to live. He did respond well to the chemo and it seemed to slow things down a bit but the side effects of the chemo were terrible.
We made the decision to enjoy what time was left and we have done as much as possible. Both being petrol heads we have continued doing track days as he loves it so much. But time is running out and he is getting really sick now. He had a stent fitted in the gullet to help with eating but it's causing terrible pain. At the latest scan they informed us it has spread to his stomach. He has refused any further chemo and I must stand by his choice. Trying to be strong but things are getting on top of me now.
fking cancer is the pits
Jenny

I feel for you.

I lost a very close friend to a brain tumor three years ago this month.

After an operation he was making good progress. Then they gave him radio therapy.

His final days would have been much, much better without the therapy. In fact, the therapy weakened him so much that it probably shortened his life as well as destroying the quality of what remained.

[Black Flag]

don4l said:

I feel for you.

I lost a very close friend to a brain tumor three years ago this month.

After an operation he was making good progress. Then they gave him radio therapy.

His final days would have been much, much better without the therapy. In fact, the therapy weakened him so much that it probably shortened his life as well as destroying the quality of what remained.

I can relate to that. The chemo did slow things down a bit for my husband. The radio therapy was supposed to help with the pain caused by the stent. He was reasonably well before the radio therapy but it made him very ill and tired and he has never recovered from this. He is barely eating anything now and is very weak and becoming withdrawn. Feel that time is now running out for us. This is such a cruel disease.

[PomBstard]

Mum starts chemo next week, and I'm flying back for the second treatment in around 4 weeks. Don't really know what to expect, but if anyone can offer any insight to chemo for Ovarian cancer, I'd be grateful to read them.

She's also made contact with the Penny Brohn Centre - she only lives 20 mins away - any experiences here??

Thanks in advance, have just realised that regardless of research I've no idea what this is all about really.

[Dan_1981]

Dan_1981 said:

After a little bit of advice from those more experienced in this kinda thing.


A close mate has been feeling under the weather since late last year, no-one could decide what was wrong with him, tiredness, stressed, listless etc.

This week he's been told he has lymphoma & leukaemia.

So far I don't know a great deal more than this as I've spoke to him only briefly. However he's in hospital and expect to be there for the next few weeks as they begin treatment, which I expect will be chemo?

He's been told it's curable but it's a long road.

I know every case is different and there aren't many details here but I'd appreciate any info anyone can provide with these scarce details - both positive and not so optimistic.

He's 34 and just had his first son

I posted the above on the 23rd of Jan 2015.

Our mate went through chemo & all the rest of it - didn't have a pleasant time of it at all.

However after ten months he finished his intensive treatment and moved to a tablet based treatment.

In Jan of this year he was more or less given the all clear and told he was in remission & things were looking up.

Sadly a couple of weeks ago he began to feel unwell again, experiencing double vision & other issues. He was told last week that the Leukaemia has returned.

3 weeks of intensive chemo starts again today, with the prospect of a stem cell transplant if they can find a matching donor. It's hit many of us very very hard this time around.

I'd love to ask as many of you as possible to sign up as a potential donor - it's such a simple process to register - they send you a couple of mouth swabs in the post - return them and that's it. You just might save someones life.

https://www.dkms.org.uk/en

[pim]

Black Flag said:

I have started to write a post on here several times but always end up deleting it. I am finding this hard to share but think I need to.
My husband was diagnosed with terminal Esophageal cancer last October and I felt like my world had ended. It had already spread through the lymph nodes to his chest. No operation was possible because of the stage and only chemo and radio therapy was offered. They gave him 3 to 6 months to live. He did respond well to the chemo and it seemed to slow things down a bit but the side effects of the chemo were terrible.
We made the decision to enjoy what time was left and we have done as much as possible. Both being petrol heads we have continued doing track days as he loves it so much. But time is running out and he is getting really sick now. He had a stent fitted in the gullet to help with eating but it's causing terrible pain. At the latest scan they informed us it has spread to his stomach. He has refused any further chemo and I must stand by his choice. Trying to be strong but things are getting on top of me now.
fking cancer is the pits
Jenny

So sorry to hear about your husband Jenny.I was diagnosed with Esophageal cancer at the age of sixty.I thought my live was over after reading all the reports about this very nasty form of cancer.I had chemo first and the big operation which lasted nine hrs.In my case I was very lucky but the cancer wasn't spread in my body.The chemo and tablets after the operation where terrible my body wanted to give up.I had depression for two years and got a lot of help from a nurse who I visited regulary.This was seven years ago and I am still here.My brother got the same cancer and my sister stomach cancer would you believe it.I went down from sixteen stone to just under twelve stone due to my stomach being used to repair the esophageal part.I take every day as a challenge because this cancer is so unpredictable it can return any time.All the best to your husband that is all what I can say there is no answer is there.

[ali_kat]

Black Flag said:

I can relate to that. The chemo did slow things down a bit for my husband. The radio therapy was supposed to help with the pain caused by the stent. He was reasonably well before the radio therapy but it made him very ill and tired and he has never recovered from this. He is barely eating anything now and is very weak and becoming withdrawn. Feel that time is now running out for us. This is such a cruel disease.

The last time I cooked for my Mum, she wanted salt on it. I refused because we'd been told by the Dr not to give her salt. We had an arguement over it If I had my time over, I'd let her eat anything she wanted, it wouldn't have made any difference to the cancer, but would have given her pleasure.

If you want to talk to someo e that's been there, drop me a line & I'll send you my number

Thinking of you, keeping you both in my prayers

[bexVN]

I have been drawn to this thread due to finding out that a good friend of mine who is only 2yrs older than me has been diagnosis pancreatic cancer that has already spread.

She had handled it all so well, ever practical she is. Whilst everyone including me blubbed as she told us. All was going well (sadly chemo was a no go after how very sick it made her) re: her plans etc, she doesn't seek much from life, single, no children but loves her cats, loves her Mum and the people she works with. Her wish was to enjoy a last Christmas with her Mum, initially thought possible by the Dr's.

2 weeks ago she found out the cancer has spread everywhere and that she is probably not going to get her Christmas wish. I am so angry for her, this has completely knocked her back now (though she is in a better state of mind again now)

Cancer really is the sttiest of st things. The positive (if there is one in this scenario?) makes me so thankful for what I have, I have had some health issues recent, unpleasant but can be treated, it also gave me the guts to hand my notice in to my current job that was becoming a point of a lot of stress and anxiety, as I have realised life is too short to feel like that, esp when little appreciation is shown for it all.

My thoughts to all those posting on here who have been diagnosed or know someone who has.

[Biggles111]

Dan_1981 said:

I posted the above on the 23rd of Jan 2015.

Our mate went through chemo & all the rest of it - didn't have a pleasant time of it at all.

However after ten months he finished his intensive treatment and moved to a tablet based treatment.

In Jan of this year he was more or less given the all clear and told he was in remission & things were looking up.

Sadly a couple of weeks ago he began to feel unwell again, experiencing double vision & other issues. He was told last week that the Leukaemia has returned.

3 weeks of intensive chemo starts again today, with the prospect of a stem cell transplant if they can find a matching donor. It's hit many of us very very hard this time around.

I'd love to ask as many of you as possible to sign up as a potential donor - it's such a simple process to register - they send you a couple of mouth swabs in the post - return them and that's it. You just might save someones life.

https://www.dkms.org.uk/en

Sorry to hear this Dan. Your friend has a good chance, so long as he can get into remission again and they can find him a donor, which they normally can. My own story, which may help, is that I was diagnosed with leukaemia (AML) in spring 2014. I did the chemo, put everything I could into into it, and was told I was low risk and there was a good chance it had fixed things. In June 2015 I relapsed. I remember an unfortunate chemo nurse asking how I felt about the treatment she was consenting me for again. My response was not very polite!

I faced even more intense chemo, developed sepsis, and eventually made it through to a Stem Cell Transplant on 20 October. I was lucky, they had a choice of donors for me, and I got a great match. I did not develop many of the post transplant issues that I had been warned of (Dan this is an important perspective for your friend, the pre-transplant talk is pretty grim as they have to spell out every risk). I did have a number of infections, but the transplant teams are second to none, and really get on top of things fast.

Recovery takes a while, I could initially not cross the room. However I keep pushing myself on, and to move forwards have taken on a voluntary role with www.bloodwise.org.uk ; Dan this and the forums on www.anthonynolan.org are worth a look if you or your friend want more info including practical aspects beyond the purely medical. As a transplant recipient I would also be pleased to help by PM if you or your friend want.

On the plus side - I am attending an event at the Speaker's House, parliament, later this month as a patient ambassador to help brief up opinion formers on the realities of treatment for us patients. I am also signed up to do a sponsored walk in three weeks; only 12 miles, compared to the 40 miles I used to walk, but a massive distance when you have been through what we have. Still not sure I will make it, but will give it my best crack! https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/Brett-Grist

[guillemot]

Bex is there any way you could hold a Christmas for her? I realise she's holding out for the date and it won't be quite the same but just like the queen has 2 birthdays, one official and one not? Is it worth trying to have a special Christmas with her, show her how much she means to you all? Or would that make it worse? Just a thought..

So sad to read all the stories of what everyone's going through here (although it's nice to read the ones where people are beating it), my thoughts are with you all, it's such a stty disease that wrecks so many lives. Carlton banks we went through multiple glioblastoma with my dad some 9 years ago, truly awful thing, I hope you're all doing ok. Black flag how are you holding up? I hope you're getting support. Can't say the nurses were so good for us but we did get excellent support from a Sue Ryder hospice which meant mum got some rest and could stay with him (they even let us take the dog in to see him, which got the biggest reaction we'd all seen for some time by that stage, he definitely knew he was there!).

Edited by guillemot on Saturday 3rd September 21:48

[Dan_1981]

Biggles/ Brett - many thanks for the above, will share with my friend,

As you can understand, first week back on chemo is knocking him about a fair bit!