Effing cancer is an effing effer, frankly

[p1stonhead]

My step dad has bone marrow cancer. 61 and retired last year

He got a huge blood clot that went to his lung a few weeks back which apparently was related so even though it nearly killed him, it meant they aparently caught the cancer early. Fingers crossed.

Edited by p1stonhead on Tuesday 14th February 14:42

[Dgr90]

Sorry to hear about your step dad.

Mum is due to have her first chemotherapy treatment on friday. Does anyone with experience of chemo have any advice on what to expect? Im going to be home with her, need to ring up and sort out carers allowance etc but I am pretty worried that I wont be able to look after her properly. Dreading it to be honest. I wish I could talk about it more, friends and family have been great but they just dont understand it all.

[p1stonhead]

Dgr90 said:

Sorry to hear about your step dad.

Mum is due to have her first chemotherapy treatment on friday. Does anyone with experience of chemo have any advice on what to expect? Im going to be home with her, need to ring up and sort out carers allowance etc but I am pretty worried that I wont be able to look after her. Dreading it to be honest. I wish I could talk about it more, friends and family have been great but they just dont understand it all.

Thanks, sorry about your mum too.

Whilst my step dad is fairly optimistic about most things so may not be the same for everyone, he says its actually fine. A nice room to sit in and read a book while it does its thing for a couple of hours apparently. He hasnt had any side effects though yet so they may come; he has been on it only a few times so far.

It seems a positive attitude helps a lot. I can imagine if he was down about it, it would take a much bigger toll.

[johnxjsc1985]

tdm34 said:

I ask myself this question all the time, I lost my wife last June, she was an absolute diamond, didn't smoke, barely drank, kept herself reasonably fit and eat sensibly, and after a massive battle we lost her, she did everything right.

it drives me mad to see so many feckless fkers drift through life whilst so many genuinely wonderful people fall to this awful disease. Sorry for your loss mate.

[motco]

Dgr90 said:

Sorry to hear about your step dad.

Mum is due to have her first chemotherapy treatment on friday. Does anyone with experience of chemo have any advice on what to expect? Im going to be home with her, need to ring up and sort out carers allowance etc but I am pretty worried that I wont be able to look after her properly. Dreading it to be honest. I wish I could talk about it more, friends and family have been great but they just dont understand it all.

I think it depends on the chemo regime she's having. Some are more arduous than others. I have experience of a close relative who's had two different regimes: FEC and docetaxel. The second was more trying than the first. The most obvious feature is hair loss unless the patient opts for a 'cold cap'. This is a refrigerated cap which reduces the effect of the drug locally - i.e. the hair follicles. The more insidious effect, and one to be very wary of, is immune system suppression. Minor infections can become very serious, keep your mum away from anything and everything that might carry an infection risk. She will be provided with a comprehensive set of leaflets outlining all of this, though. Some chemo regimes don't cause hair loss at all. Good Luck to her, and to you. My mum died from breast cancer but it took her nine years to do it and she was pretty well most of that time. This was the sixties and seventies so primitive times compared with now.

[FBP1]

mcford said:

Two weeks ago I got confirmation of a Metastatic Pancreatic Carcinoma diagnosis, in my experience don't feel awkward when talking to people about it, treat them as normal

Sorry to hear that, mcford. You are taking an admirably levelheaded approach by the sound of it. I lost a friend some time ago to Non Hodgkins Lymphoma and although unfortunately he didn't make it in the end, he took a similar approach to you and it made the time he had, and that of those close to him, more cherished .

[Mrs Muttleysnoop]

Dgr90 said:

Mum is due to have her first chemotherapy treatment on friday. Does anyone with experience of chemo have any advice on what to expect? Im going to be home with her, need to ring up and sort out carers allowance etc but I am pretty worried that I wont be able to look after her properly. Dreading it to be honest. I wish I could talk about it more, friends and family have been great but they just dont understand it all.

I first diagnosed with advanced cancer some few years ago and have dealt with it again.

Now Chemo. Your mother will get very tired. Her bowels will go bonkers. Get her some Waitrose Baby Bottom Cream when her bowels explode.

Hopefully her hospital give advice about what to eat and what not to eat due to risk of infection.

Food not to eat - seafood, soft ice cream, take aways, bottled water, salad in bags etc.

Make sure all food is cooked properly.

The first chemo is the worst as one does not know what to expect. After my first one I expected to explode!!! I did not.


Chemo staff are lovely. Anti sick drugs are so good now.


I really wish your mother the best of luck but remember to look after yourself. Also something else to bear in mind, she might well fly into rages due to the drugs ie steroids.


ETA She might also have some horrible scary dreams. I did.

Edited by Mrs Muttleysnoop on Wednesday 15th February 15:43

[g77]

Dgr90 said:

Sorry to hear about your step dad.

Mum is due to have her first chemotherapy treatment on friday. Does anyone with experience of chemo have any advice on what to expect? Im going to be home with her, need to ring up and sort out carers allowance etc but I am pretty worried that I wont be able to look after her properly. Dreading it to be honest. I wish I could talk about it more, friends and family have been great but they just dont understand it all.

TBH there isn't a hard and fast rule. It depends on the person and the type of chemo.

I had FCR chemo - 7 rounds, no radiography.
My cycles were spaced monthly.
And I had one course of IV drugs and pills on day 1.
Then a further 4 days of pills.

Apparently FCR is meant to be particularly aggressive in terms of side-effects.

Day one was fine -- could move freely and had reasonable energy levels
Day 2 & 3 - flat on my arse in bed.
Day 4 and onwards moving about at 60 - 80% of normality

And then gradually recovering to 90% over the next three weeks........ready for the next cycle.

My advice -- get your mum a decent book / load up the Kindle ipad.

IV chemo is bloody, mindlessly dull as you're basically attached to a chair for a couple of hours (trying to negotiate a toilet with a IV drip stand in one hand is not particularly amusing)

And I found the actual chemo itself took my mind off things.
Although intrinsically I know I'm only time managing my cancer, just being in a medical world with all those white coats feels reassuring.

Be warned post chemo is when the reality of being "medically on your own" can sinks in.
You've got a lot of time on your own to reflect and mull things over.

And family and friends all support during chemo but assume that you'll be rights as rain afterwards.....my consultant says at least six months

I've had two viral infections post chemo -- two trips to A&E and then several days in hospital.

[motco]

Neutropaenic sepsis is always a serious possibility. It is an infection related condition brought about by having the neutrophil count depressed by the chemotherapy drugs. Watch for symptoms - raised temperature, feelings of generally being very unwell, shaking and shivering. Google sepsis symptoms.

[Dgr90]

Thank you all for your replies. I really appreciate it, not only have you guys done all of that before but you are sticking around on here to help others. Amazing.

[PomBstard]

Bit of an update on my mum. The results of the hysterectomy back in December show that the cancer started in one of the Fallopian tubes, so at least we know where the primary was. Her recovery has continued, and she has completed a further three chemo sessions and is now back doing stuff for herself including driving herself around. Which is all excellent as far as we can tell.

Had the final MRI last week, and meeting with the consultant is next week - not sure why there needs to be a couple of weeks between scan and chat, but that's where we are.

All things seem to point to a good recovery so far. Hair also growing back, and weight being regained. Her plan is to go back to work, and retire in October, when she'll be 70, then come over here for 3 months. She wants her hair to grow back before coming over, which I understand.

I think its a remarkable thing to have happened, in so short a timeframe - diagnosis, treatment, recovery all in about 8 months so far.

I'll update after the consultant's chat in a week or so.

[Gruffy]

Last summer I used the Transcontinental Race as a platform to raise funds for CRUK and got a real boost from Pistonheads and PHers. I was lucky enough to have a lab tour at Barts recently and see first hand how everybody's generosity is being put to use. It was fascinating and inspiring in equal measure and I'm sure others here will find it interesting.

https://theadventurecapitalist.wordpress.com/2017/...

[Mrs Muttleysnoop]

PomBstard said:

Bit of an update on my mum. The results of the hysterectomy back in December show that the cancer started in one of the Fallopian tubes, so at least we know where the primary was. Her recovery has continued, and she has completed a further three chemo sessions and is now back doing stuff for herself including driving herself around. Which is all excellent as far as we can tell.

Had the final MRI last week, and meeting with the consultant is next week - not sure why there needs to be a couple of weeks between scan and chat, but that's where we are.

All things seem to point to a good recovery so far. Hair also growing back, and weight being regained. Her plan is to go back to work, and retire in October, when she'll be 70, then come over here for 3 months. She wants her hair to grow back before coming over, which I understand.

I think its a remarkable thing to have happened, in so short a timeframe - diagnosis, treatment, recovery all in about 8 months so far.

I'll update after the consultant's chat in a week or so.

Wonderful news. So pleased to read how well she is doing.

[groundcontrol]

groundcontrol said:

Hey, stuck this in the Lounge which quickly fell back a page, but I believe a recent entry came from a PH member and the search to find out led me to this thread!

I'm trying to raise some money for Cancer Research UK, my girlfriend is a breast cancer survivor and there's been others in my life that haven't been so lucky. This thread truly is sobering reading and quite upsetting to read through, but maybe there's some hope for others in the future. I'm therefore raffling a driving experience day for £5 to anyone who'd like to contribute to this charity, my JustGiving page is here:

https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/drivingexpe...

I'm over half way and would love to hit my target of £250. The winner will be decided by the March 11th bonus ball on the National Lottery so plenty of time to go. If you don't fancy the driving day I'm also offering a cash prize of £75 as an alternate. I'm sure I don't need to extol the virtues here but it's a great cause so any amount is welcome even if you don't fancy buying a ticket for a fiver.

Thanks!

Still got some tickets left for this if anyone's interested Lets kick Cancer in the nuts!

[bexVN]

groundcontrol said:

groundcontrol said:

Hey, stuck this in the Lounge which quickly fell back a page, but I believe a recent entry came from a PH member and the search to find out led me to this thread!

I'm trying to raise some money for Cancer Research UK, my girlfriend is a breast cancer survivor and there's been others in my life that haven't been so lucky. This thread truly is sobering reading and quite upsetting to read through, but maybe there's some hope for others in the future. I'm therefore raffling a driving experience day for £5 to anyone who'd like to contribute to this charity, my JustGiving page is here:

https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/drivingexpe...

I'm over half way and would love to hit my target of £250. The winner will be decided by the March 11th bonus ball on the National Lottery so plenty of time to go. If you don't fancy the driving day I'm also offering a cash prize of £75 as an alternate. I'm sure I don't need to extol the virtues here but it's a great cause so any amount is welcome even if you don't fancy buying a ticket for a fiver.

Thanks!

Still got some tickets left for this if anyone's interested Lets kick Cancer in the nuts!

Could I donate after the 11th. I am not interested in the prizes but would like to support your cause (unfortunately I have had no income for two months so I am having to be very careful with my money right now, hopefully will be better in a couple weeks!!)

[groundcontrol]

bexVN said:

Could I donate after the 11th. I am not interested in the prizes but would like to support your cause (unfortunately I have had no income for two months so I am having to be very careful with my money right now, hopefully will be better in a couple weeks!!)

Pm'd

[groundcontrol]

Thanks to all that donated from here and elsewhere, the target of £250 has been reached But also thanks to people's incredible generosity there's still 7 tickets left up for grabs!

[Bungleaio]

3 years and 15 days since this disease took my mum away and its back to my family with a double blow this afternoon. My girlfriends dad has been diagnosed with a skin cancer which I think isn't too much to worry about going on what I've been told and my aunt has been diagnosed with something rare in the womb, I didn't really ask questions about this but my uncle is obviously devastated, they are both due to retire in July.

Before Christmas I lost a friend to this, she was 32 and one of my best mates dad's passed shortly after diagnosis at 64. Friday I'm going to another funeral for one of my girlfriends uncles who also had it but at least he was in his 80s.

This disease is an effing effer!

[groundcontrol]

Sold all the raffle tickets I was selling, so thanks to everyone that bought one.

If you didn't get to enter but still wanna send over 50p or something you still can and it'd all be appreciated.

https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/drivingexpe...

Cheers

[p1stonhead]

p1stonhead said:

My step dad has bone marrow cancer. 61 and retired last year

He got a huge blood clot that went to his lung a few weeks back which apparently was related so even though it nearly killed him, it meant they aparently caught the cancer early. Fingers crossed.

Edited by p1stonhead on Tuesday 14th February 14:42

Step dad has been referred to the Marsden for high dose therapy and stem cell treatment now. Im told this is a huge positive and means he responded well to the initial chemo.

I believe he will be an in-patient for a month though. Gonna be fairly hellish apparently but long term picture is apparently better.