Confused about an ex-girlfriend

[Petrolhead95]

I'd rather not.

[All that jazz]

Petrolhead95 said:

I can't just switch off, you're right. But what's the point in sitting around feeling sorry for myself chasing after someone who either doesn't want to be in a relationship with me or doesn't know what she wants. If she decides she wants to give it another go somewhere down the line, great, I'll give it a shot. But for now I'm not interested.

Best way mate, but who are you trying to convince here? Us or yourself?

The worst possible position for you to put yourself in is for you to be following her around drooling over her like a little lap dog, waiting for her to give you the green light. That's exactly what she wants you to do and she's got you right where she wants you. You need to get into the habit of ignoring her comms or taking a long time to reply to them - most young girls hate it when they don't get an instant response. 12 hours should do it to begin with and when you get the inevitable follow up message "what's wrong? how come it's taken you so long to reply?" you keep the replies short and vague with "just been really busy" and don't get into discussions or explanations with her. Don't answer the phone if she rings. Don't comment, like or reply to her FB stuff and definitely do not see her in person as this will give her the perfect opportunity to get you blabbing your true feelings and all the above will have been completely wasted.

Again, if you're at least a 6/10 in looks and not a fatty GET YOURSELF ON fkING TINDER and you'll have forgotten all about this within a few weeks. You cannot fail to pull on Tinder if you're not ugly and not fat.

[Petrolhead95]

All that jazz said:

Best way mate, but who are you trying to convince here? Us or yourself?

The worst possible position for you to put yourself in is for you to be following her around drooling over her like a little lap dog, waiting for her to give you the green light. That's exactly what she wants you to do and she's got you right where she wants you. You need to get into the habit of ignoring her comms or taking a long time to reply to them - most young girls hate it when they don't get an instant response. 12 hours should do it to begin with and when you get the inevitable follow up message "what's wrong? how come it's taken you so long to reply?" you keep the replies short and vague with "just been really busy" and don't get into discussions or explanations with her. Don't answer the phone if she rings. Don't comment, like or reply to her FB stuff and definitely do not see her in person as this will give her the perfect opportunity to get you blabbing your true feelings and all the above will have been completely wasted.

Again, if you're at least a 6/10 in looks and not a fatty GET YOURSELF ON fkING TINDER and you'll have forgotten all about this within a few weeks. You cannot fail to pull on Tinder if you're not ugly and not fat.

Funny you say that. She said we should not talk for a week yesterday evening, I then got a message late last night saying goodnight - I ignored it. I then get messages this morning asking if I'm pissed off with her and that she misses being able to talk to me. I was in control for 12 hours and she hated it.

[Hainey]

Maybe her motor needs fuel?

[Rh14n]

Petrolhead95 said:

All that jazz said:

Best way mate, but who are you trying to convince here? Us or yourself?

The worst possible position for you to put yourself in is for you to be following her around drooling over her like a little lap dog, waiting for her to give you the green light. That's exactly what she wants you to do and she's got you right where she wants you. You need to get into the habit of ignoring her comms or taking a long time to reply to them - most young girls hate it when they don't get an instant response. 12 hours should do it to begin with and when you get the inevitable follow up message "what's wrong? how come it's taken you so long to reply?" you keep the replies short and vague with "just been really busy" and don't get into discussions or explanations with her. Don't answer the phone if she rings. Don't comment, like or reply to her FB stuff and definitely do not see her in person as this will give her the perfect opportunity to get you blabbing your true feelings and all the above will have been completely wasted.

Again, if you're at least a 6/10 in looks and not a fatty GET YOURSELF ON fkING TINDER and you'll have forgotten all about this within a few weeks. You cannot fail to pull on Tinder if you're not ugly and not fat.

Funny you say that. She said we should not talk for a week yesterday evening, I then got a message late last night saying goodnight - I ignored it. I then get messages this morning asking if I'm pissed off with her and that she misses being able to talk to me. I was in control for 12 hours and she hated it.

You know what? I know you're both young but you're both also rather immature in the way you're behaving, constantly playing games. In my previous comment I suggested that she was seeking reassurance that your feelings are genuine for her. By now I'm leaning more towards that she is very immature, attention seeking and enjoying the power that she now has over you. If the relationship is to survive you both need to grow up a bit.

[All that jazz]

Petrolhead95 said:

Funny you say that. She said we should not talk for a week yesterday evening, I then got a message late last night saying goodnight - I ignored it. I then get messages this morning asking if I'm pissed off with her and that she misses being able to talk to me. I was in control for 12 hours and she hated it.

There you go! You're quickly discovering how women's minds work - once you've sussed that it's easy-peasy. As a general rule, what they say is often the opposite of what they actually want.

Don't be fooled into thinking her rekindled interest in you because you're ignoring her means that she'll want you back because it won't. You're (imho) firmly in her 'friend zone' now and she has no interest in you other than for sex when she wants it and to hear you repeatedly tell her how great she is and buy her lots of expensive stuff.

AND ARE YOU ON TINDER YET?

[Kaj91]

All that jazz said:

bluenosewrx said:

p.S WHAT GIFTS YOU GOT TO SELL???? i have not bought my birds yet, anything decent?.

Found in another thread :

petrolhead95 said:

Giant 3ft teddy bear, Pandora charm bracelet with 3 charms, Pandora promise ring, Tiffany engraved bracelet, mug with her name on it and a heart locket.

She already has one.

[All that jazz]

Kaj91 said:

She already has one.

Harsh! I'd seen that opportunity myself but decided to leave it!

[xjay1337]

Petrolhead95 said:

Funny you say that. She said we should not talk for a week yesterday evening, I then got a message late last night saying goodnight - I ignored it. I then get messages this morning asking if I'm pissed off with her and that she misses being able to talk to me. I was in control for 12 hours and she hated it.

Exactly what i and others said would happen.

You said before on the last page you felt you were punching above your league.

That doesnt help and can make it harder to let her go.


Please please tell her to jog on. We are all telling you this with YOUR best intentions at heart.

You can either ignore, continue to chase her and end up an emotional wreck or take control make a clean break now and move on.

Please do the latter mate.
Honestly its a very similar situation to my ex and it nearly killed me. I wish i had the stength I had now and PH to guide me through it... :-)

Edited by xjay1337 on Thursday 1st December 22:46

[Wobbegong]

All that jazz said:

bluenosewrx said:

p.S WHAT GIFTS YOU GOT TO SELL???? i have not bought my birds yet, anything decent?.

Found in another thread :

petrolhead95 said:

Giant 3ft teddy bear, Pandora charm bracelet with 3 charms, Pandora promise ring, Tiffany engraved bracelet, mug with her name on it and a heart locket.

OP I have a solution. Don't sell the items, just find a girlfriend with the same name (or get her to change her name)

[Wobbegong]

P.s don't feel too deflated. Every one of us have gone through this and thought we were losing 'the one'. In a few years time you'll cringe when you think of what happened....but it does take a little while to get over

[Flibble]

Wobbegong said:

OP I have a solution. Don't sell the items, just find a girlfriend with the same name (or get her to change her name)

A Viz top tip if ever I saw one.

[Petrolhead95]

Wobbegong said:

P.s don't feel too deflated. Every one of us have gone through this and thought we were losing 'the one'. In a few years time you'll cringe when you think of what happened....but it does take a little while to get over

Thanks. Made harder by the fact that she doesn't want us to talk any less but I guess it will get easier over time. I feel stupid about all this as I'm only 21.

[Hainey]

Petrolhead95 said:

Wobbegong said:

P.s don't feel too deflated. Every one of us have gone through this and thought we were losing 'the one'. In a few years time you'll cringe when you think of what happened....but it does take a little while to get over

Thanks. Made harder by the fact that she doesn't want us to talk any less but I guess it will get easier over time. I feel stupid about all this as I'm only 21.

I went through exactly the same thing you did at 21, odd that. My solution was to get as far away from it as possible by joining the Royal Navy and spend the next few years whoring it like a champ while learning a trade.

My God that woman did me a favour!

[hyphen]

All that jazz said:

bluenosewrx said:

p.S WHAT GIFTS YOU GOT TO SELL???? i have not bought my birds yet, anything decent?.

Found in another thread :

petrolhead95 said:

Giant 3ft teddy bear, Pandora charm bracelet with 3 charms, Pandora promise ring, Tiffany engraved bracelet, mug with her name on it and a heart locket.

Sorry, I know this is a tough time for Mr PetrolHead95, but...


3ft Teddy bear?! promise ring? mug with her name? Are you sure she is 18 and not 12

[hyphen]

All that jazz said:

Kaj91 said:

She already has one.

Harsh! I'd seen that opportunity myself but decided to leave it!

[okgo]

hyphen said:

Sorry, I know this is a tough time for Mr PetrolHead95, but...


3ft Teddy bear?! promise ring? mug with her name? Are you sure she is 18 and not 12

+1 - I want to see a picture of this chav princess, OP, can you supply at your earliest convenience. Ta.

[Petrolhead95]

No photos, no custard tests. As much as I love to show her off, or used to be able to, I'm not going to.

[All that jazz]

How many unanswered missed calls, texts and FB messages do you have now?

[Petrolhead95]

All that jazz said:

How many unanswered missed calls, texts and FB messages do you have now?

None. I woke up to two missed calls, three Snapchats and a text but I also woke up on the floor with paramedics around me due to my lovely illness so I couldn't exactly ignore her when she's upset/worried about me, asking how I am.