Confused about an ex-girlfriend

[Petrolhead95]

I'm not going to delete her from my life! Yes, we're having a rough patch but that doesn't mean we can't be friends. People who you completely "click" with don't come around too often and as she is very much willing to support me when I'm ill I can't waste that

[Flibble]

Petrolhead95 said:

I'm not going to delete her from my life! Yes, we're having a rough patch but that doesn't mean we can't be friends. People who you completely "click" with don't come around too often and as she is very much willing to support me when I'm ill I can't waste that

From experience: You can't be friends. There is too much backstory there for it to work.

[Petrolhead95]

Flibble said:

From experience: You can't be friends. There is too much backstory there for it to work.

Well I guess that's for us to find out/work out. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.

[All that jazz]

Petrolhead95 said:

I'm not going to delete her from my life! Yes, we're having a rough patch but that doesn't mean we can't be friends. People who you completely "click" with don't come around too often and as she is very much willing to support me when I'm ill I can't waste that

[MYOB]

We all know from bitter experience that it will be almost impossible for the OP to remain friends. But let him experience life as we did without the benefits of hindsight.

[Hainey]

Petrolhead95 said:

I'm not going to delete her from my life! Yes, we're having a rough patch but that doesn't mean we can't be friends. People who you completely "click" with don't come around too often and as she is very much willing to support me when I'm ill I can't waste that

So when the bloke with perfect health turns up that's at the gym 4 times a week, flashing the big cash and she's walking like she couldn't stop a pig in an alleyway because he's doing what we all did at that age and smashing it bandy (at least) twice a day you'll still want to be having cosy chats will you?

Aye right. Heard it.

[Petrolhead95]

Hainey said:

So when the bloke with perfect health turns up that's at the gym 4 times a week, flashing the big cash and she's walking like she couldn't stop a pig in an alleyway because he's doing what we all did at that age and smashing it bandy (at least) twice a day you'll still want to be having cosy chats will you?

Aye right. Heard it.

Thanks for putting that lovely image of another guy having sex with her. Makes me feel a bunch better...

[All that jazz]

Hainey said:

and she's walking like she couldn't stop a pig in an alleyway

I'm nicking that.

[stuartmmcfc]

OP:earlier.

[All that jazz]

Petrolhead95 said:

Thanks for putting that lovely image of another guy having sex with her. Makes me feel a bunch better...

You've only got yourself to blame because you've posted wanting advice, you've received requested advice, you've then chose to ignore it all and tell us in a roundabout way we're all wrong, and now you're crying because people are starting to take the piss which is what always happens in these threads when advice is ignored.

Ending it now will hurt. Ending it later (more likely instigated by her) will hurt even more. One of the two will happen in the near future. Take your pick.

[xjay1337]

All that jazz said:

Petrolhead95 said:

Thanks for putting that lovely image of another guy having sex with her. Makes me feel a bunch better...

You've only got yourself to blame because you've posted wanting advice, you've received requested advice, you've then chose to ignore it all and tell us in a roundabout way we're all wrong, and now you're crying because people are starting to take the piss which is what always happens in these threads when advice is ignored.

Ending it now will hurt. Ending it later (more likely instigated by her) will hurt even more. One of the two will happen in the near future. Take your pick.

Yup.

This is exactly it.

All of us who have posted up have been in the same situation as you. We have already suffered the heartbreak pain and suffering and we have all learnt from it...as best as we can!

At your age there is NO reason to remain friends. The only time I think you should remain "friends" is if you are married and have children and then have an amicable breakup. That way it's not awkward at kids birthday parties etc.

She will soon be taking all 8 inches of skinny jeans, no socks wearing arms day "lad" called Gary all the while you are trying to hold on to some glimmer of hope on your relationship by remaining "friends", that relationship which is OVER*

/* ps that's the first time I've ever bolded something on PH.

Don't be a fking ask hole. Delete her and move on.

When one of my ex's and I broke up I was heartbroken. I had introduced her and integrated her into my friend group of whom I had been friends with for YEARS before she even showed her little manipulative face. I tried to go to a few events (we attended small car meets) and that didn't work so I STOPPED going.

It would have been 50x more difficult to watch her with her new boyfriend (whom she has since fked over as well but anyway). You need space, time distance and a clear perspective to move past her.

Think of it like this. Relationships / love cause some of the same chemical reactions as taking drugs.
You are trying to get off that drug that you were previously a daily user of... you can't escape your addiction by taking it weekly.......

MAN UP. In the kindest possible way.

[Petrolhead95]

I'm not crying over these replies and I've taken everything on board. In the space of a day you guys have changed my mind from waiting for her to come around to making the decision to move on. All I want is the chance to remain friends with her, at least for the time being, to see if it can work. If it doesn't then I'll move on completely.

[Flibble]

stuartmmcfc said:

OP:earlier.

OP earlier, in profile:

[tribalsurfer]

Petrolhead95 said:

I'm not crying over these replies and I've taken everything on board. In the space of a day you guys have changed my mind from waiting for her to come around to making the decision to move on. All I want is the chance to remain friends with her, at least for the time being, to see if it can work. If it doesn't then I'll move on completely.

Oh dear, you seem to have made the decision and reverted in the same sentence.

[bluenosewrx]

What's on the Tiffany thing?? Or pandora, I am interested in you want rid, ram the teddy and mug though

[Petrolhead95]

tribalsurfer said:

Oh dear, you seem to have made the decision and reverted in the same sentence.

One is regarding a relationship and the other is friendship.

[Petrolhead95]

bluenosewrx said:

What's on the Tiffany thing?? Or pandora, I am interested in you want rid, ram the teddy and mug though

The Tiffany thing is hers. I won't be selling it despite spending a four figure sum on it.

[hyphen]

You need to go from this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHOf3s70w-c

To this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Qg3rQfeZv4

HTH

[All that jazz]

Petrolhead95 said:

apart from looking after me for the past six months, taking me shopping because I'm too ill, helping me out when I'm too ill to get out of bed, making me food, help me shower etc etc etc.

Do you need your arse wiping for you as well? Do you really think it's fair to shackle the hot 18 yr old girl into that life when she's made enough noises that she wants out

girlfriend said:

she said she wanted a "break" to work out what she wants

[...]

She asked for some space and she will come to me when she's ready

[...]

she said she doesn't know what will happen in the future.

[...]

she would keep saying stuff like "Not right now"

It's pretty clear to any outsider that she's had enough and wants out. Let her go ffs and stop being such a wet flannel.


In other news I'm somewhat puzzled how you're able to do this :

petrolhead95 said:

I've spent all my wages on buying dinner for us when I'm over hers, buying her clothes, filling up her car, making her dinner, cleaning her room, helping her get ready for work.

When you claim to be this

petrolhead95 said:

You mean apart from looking after me for the past six months, taking me shopping because I'm too ill, helping me out when I'm too ill to get out of bed, making me food, help me shower etc etc etc. I could go on.

Sounds to me like you'd be better back at home with your mum, or some kind of professional mobility help. The noises the girl is making about caring for you is merely to make you feel better and ease her own conscience. She wants out but she hasn't got a clue how to go about it without coming across as being a bh.

[Wobbegong]

All that jazz said:

Do you think a Klingon vagina looks similar to their forehead?