ADHD - Adults

Author
Discussion

Woodrow Wilson

342 posts

160 months

Friday 31st July 2020
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Hugo Stiglitz said:
Covid happened. I became a hamster spinning in a wheel. Fast, no direction.

Now I'm on Ritalin. I refuse to go a above 18mg.

How's everyone else coping? Live with it and any tips?
I'm assuming that you have been working throughout?

It sounds as if you are a Police officer or similar. Have you done that for a long time? I would have thought that was a good career choice for someone who enjoys doing a frequently changing range of activities - dependent upon role.

I've found desk working from home at my job to be frustratingly dull.

Hugo Stiglitz

37,133 posts

211 months

Friday 31st July 2020
quotequote all
How did you spot my job Mr Holmes? laugh

Yes usually I revel in a sudden high intensity and stressful situation.

I describe my 'quirk' as a positive and a plus usually.

Covid seems to have robbed me of my usual pressure release valve.

sbarclay62

Original Poster:

617 posts

57 months

Saturday 1st August 2020
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Hugo Stiglitz said:
I have ADHD. I was on the waiting list for years, apperently the minimum wait at the moment is 5yrs locally.

I went private in the end.

I always saw my quirks as a bonus and a benefit but I had my coping strategies which was gym daily, cycling (alot) and alot of Judo in the last two years (I've gone from new person to blue belt). I've always been very intensive. Anything I pick up I absolutely focus on obsessively...but that's also partly something else..


Covid happened. I became a hamster spinning in a wheel. Fast, no direction.

Now I'm on Ritalin. I refuse to go a above 18mg.

How's everyone else coping? Live with it and any tips?
5 years!? I hope that's a typo. If not what was the wait for?

I went to the docs at the end of Feb, should've received the questionnaires but due to covid/forms lost in post/she forgot to process them I never got them until 3 weeks ago after chasing the reception staff twice. Filled in the forms and handed back the same day. Call from the Dr saying i've been referred to the psychiatric dept. and someone should be in touch within "a few months" - not ideal but can live with that.


Completely at a crossroads career wise now though. Approaching 32. Left my old job in IT (Tech Support) in December for family reasons and because I fking hated it. Drove for Uber for 4 months then lockdown happened. Got a 9 month contract with Amazon and left after a fortnight (Nothing to do with potential ADHD and everything to do with they are horrible bds). Been in retaul since doing shelve stacking and grocery deliveries. Don't actually mind the job - it just pays next to nothing. Weird that my IT job had a very good salary, decent pension, company car etc and it filled me with dread, i hated pretty much every minute off it. I much prefer this one and it pays a whopping £8.72 an hour! Guess its because i'm always on the go as opposed to being chained to a desk all day.

No idea what to do next though. Applied to do a degree in Cyber Security but pulled out. Don't fancy swapping one desk job for another despite the chances off earning some decent cash...

sbarclay62

Original Poster:

617 posts

57 months

Saturday 1st August 2020
quotequote all
Sa Calobra said:
Anyone else run out of patience quickly at house parties and have to leave?
I can get like that at pubs, bars and restaurants. Very very restless. Always happy to take the empties upto the bar then come back for a sit. Then i'll put a few quid in the puggy and sit back down. Then nip to the toilet even though i'm not needing then sit back down. Then repeat that until 3-4 pints in then when the booze hits and the body and mind calm down I can literally sit their all night sipping on pints feeling pretty fking great - which can be good and bad. Good cos its good for the brain not to be racing at 300mph but bad 'cos i can imagine it can be quite a bad habit to fall into (Thankfully its one i've not fallen into)

cashmax

1,106 posts

240 months

Saturday 1st August 2020
quotequote all
Wow, feel like I’m reading my own thread!

I’m 49 and in the last couple of years have taken both my kids (now 13 & 16) to be diagnosed with ADHD. During this process it became apparent that I ticked all the boxes and ended up also being diagnosed at the same time as our youngest.

At School I really struggled to concentrate and despite my parents throwing the kitchen sink at it, including retaking my O’levels, I ended up just scraping through only 3 of them in total.

My mind is always racing and whenever I want something or decide to do something, it has to be now, not tomorrow or next week, but now. I often overthink things and often get anxious.

15 years ago I setup up my own business (b2b ISP) and just like someone above mentioned, I was fortunate enough to employ some very good executors, who would always deliver, so I just had to come up with the ideas and strategy which was the easy bit for me and tell others how to deliver it. The business grew beyond all of our expectations and we went on a proper journey, with me finally checking out when it was sold for a 3rd time earlier this year for just under £200M.

During board meetings I used to really struggle, breaking pencils, fiddling with stuff and would always find an excuse to leave the room for a break. In fact I recall when we were negotiating our 2nd management buyout, I left the room and went and locked myself in the toilet for 15 minutes and played games on my phone on several occasions.

As others have mentioned, I do the same if I’m out for dinner for example, I just need to go and change the scenery for a few minutes every hour or so.

Long haul flights are one thing that fill me with dread, as does sitting on a beach. All our holidays tend to revolve around some sort of activity (skiing, fishing, boating etc) which suits at least 3 of us very well. But my wife’s idea of a relaxing holiday is sitting in the sun with a good book for hours on end, which can cause problems….

I decided to tell my colleagues at work that I was diagnosed with ADHD a few months ago. Amusingly not one of them even raised an eyebrow, they had clearly all figured it out years ago!

Although I was offered medication, after 50 years living with it, I think I’ve found out how to get the best from it and get over the negatives, my friends know me for who I am and I really have no desire to change anything apart from perhaps the anxiety.

Strangely, I really enjoy having a bad cold. It seems to allow my body to slow down and relax, makes me feel calm and finally just idle somehow.

So far as the kids are concerned, the medication has helped them hugely with exams and stuff with them both referring to it as NCT for anyone that has seen the film limitless.


Edited by cashmax on Saturday 1st August 09:50

272BHP

5,072 posts

236 months

Saturday 1st August 2020
quotequote all
I think maybe I have something like this. Mind constantly racing, multiple projects on the go and an inability to finish most of them.

Also, any kind of form filling fills me with utter dread and i will put these tasks off for as long as I can. I still haven't sorted out my pensions from the last 7 years. Whenever I have moved jobs another pension fund is set up and I haven't bothered to opt out and move them over, I have about 5 now - it is a job that i just cannot force myself to tackle. if there was a financial service that would sort all this out for me I would jump at it.

One thing I have noticed is that my handwriting is weird, I always start forming the letter ahead of the one I should be writing so I have to force myself to slow my writing down to half speed otherwise my writing is illegible - not sure if this is typical in ADHD sufferers?

VR99

1,263 posts

63 months

Sunday 2nd August 2020
quotequote all
I don't know if I have an element of mild ADHD or I'm just making excuses! It's the ADD type that I think I may have.
I'm in my late 30's, never been in trouble with the law, went to good schools and then struggled through uni ending up having to do retake years. I've always had a life long struggle with time management and organisation. Whilst I fixed some of those issues in adult life by using to-do lists and calendars it's still a challenge. I also have problems concentrating on tasks, tend to get easily distracted with severe procrastination and this is still a problem where I don't always feel motivated sufficiently to put in my full effort. To some extent believe this held me back academically and in career. I also feel that sometimes I struggle to my get head around complex issues or tasks compared to my peers, it takes me much longer to "conceptualise" and fully understand it. Recently been thinking do I have a form of adhd. A close family member had a severe mental illness so linking the dots sometimes I wonder if there is something there but unsure e.g: the way I am "wired". I know there can be links to depression but don't believe that's an issue..I am a fairly positive person and after seeing how it impacted close family members(talking severe mental illness/depression that ended their careers and then lifelong treatment) always trying to ensure I get the right balance in life to avoid that slippery slope so regular exercise etc

I also think I mean towards the 'thinker/rumination' type personality so am always consciously trying to move away from that mindset e.g: don't overthink stuff/things..either take action or don't as opposed to getting too bogged down in the weeds! But it's harder than we think..to not think! I've tried meditation but not able to do it yet and likely need to put in sustained practice but end up saying IL.do it another time and rather watch Netflix instead!

Edited by VR99 on Sunday 2nd August 08:21


Edited by VR99 on Sunday 2nd August 08:25


Edited by VR99 on Sunday 2nd August 08:28

Woodrow Wilson

342 posts

160 months

Sunday 2nd August 2020
quotequote all
VR99 said:
I don't know if I have an element of mild ADHD or I'm just making excuses! It's the ADD type that I think I may have.
I'm in my late 30's, never been in trouble with the law, went to good schools and then struggled through uni ending up having to do retake years. I've always had a life long struggle with time management and organisation. Whilst I fixed some of those issues in adult life by using to-do lists and calendars it's still a challenge. I also have problems concentrating on tasks, tend to get easily distracted with severe procrastination and this is still a problem where I don't always feel motivated sufficiently to put in my full effort. To some extent believe this held me back academically and in career. I also feel that sometimes I struggle to my get head around complex issues or tasks compared to my peers, it takes me much longer to "conceptualise" and fully understand it. Recently been thinking do I have a form of adhd. A close family member had a severe mental illness so linking the dots sometimes I wonder if there is something there but unsure e.g: the way I am "wired". I know there can be links to depression but don't believe that's an issue..I am a fairly positive person and after seeing how it impacted close family members(talking severe mental illness/depression that ended their careers and then lifelong treatment) always trying to ensure I get the right balance in life to avoid that slippery slope so regular exercise etc

I also think I mean towards the 'thinker/rumination' type personality so am always consciously trying to move away from that mindset e.g: don't overthink stuff/things..either take action or don't as opposed to getting too bogged down in the weeds! But it's harder than we think..to not think! I've tried meditation but not able to do it yet and likely need to put in sustained practice but end up saying IL.do it another time and rather watch Netflix instead!
I feel your frustration.

There are a lot (although not all) of things that sound similar to my own experiences.

I'm good with concepts and explaining them to people just very poor at following through with detailed work, planning tasks and completing them (unless I decided to do them in the first place) . My procrastination is chronic.

The effort involved in planning and organising is ridiculous.

sbarclay62

Original Poster:

617 posts

57 months

Saturday 8th August 2020
quotequote all
cashmax said:
Wow, feel like I’m reading my own thread!

I’m 49 and in the last couple of years have taken both my kids (now 13 & 16) to be diagnosed with ADHD. During this process it became apparent that I ticked all the boxes and ended up also being diagnosed at the same time as our youngest.

At School I really struggled to concentrate and despite my parents throwing the kitchen sink at it, including retaking my O’levels, I ended up just scraping through only 3 of them in total.

My mind is always racing and whenever I want something or decide to do something, it has to be now, not tomorrow or next week, but now. I often overthink things and often get anxious.

15 years ago I setup up my own business (b2b ISP) and just like someone above mentioned, I was fortunate enough to employ some very good executors, who would always deliver, so I just had to come up with the ideas and strategy which was the easy bit for me and tell others how to deliver it. The business grew beyond all of our expectations and we went on a proper journey, with me finally checking out when it was sold for a 3rd time earlier this year for just under £200M.

During board meetings I used to really struggle, breaking pencils, fiddling with stuff and would always find an excuse to leave the room for a break. In fact I recall when we were negotiating our 2nd management buyout, I left the room and went and locked myself in the toilet for 15 minutes and played games on my phone on several occasions.

As others have mentioned, I do the same if I’m out for dinner for example, I just need to go and change the scenery for a few minutes every hour or so.

Long haul flights are one thing that fill me with dread, as does sitting on a beach. All our holidays tend to revolve around some sort of activity (skiing, fishing, boating etc) which suits at least 3 of us very well. But my wife’s idea of a relaxing holiday is sitting in the sun with a good book for hours on end, which can cause problems….

I decided to tell my colleagues at work that I was diagnosed with ADHD a few months ago. Amusingly not one of them even raised an eyebrow, they had clearly all figured it out years ago!

Although I was offered medication, after 50 years living with it, I think I’ve found out how to get the best from it and get over the negatives, my friends know me for who I am and I really have no desire to change anything apart from perhaps the anxiety.

Strangely, I really enjoy having a bad cold. It seems to allow my body to slow down and relax, makes me feel calm and finally just idle somehow.

So far as the kids are concerned, the medication has helped them hugely with exams and stuff with them both referring to it as NCT for anyone that has seen the film limitless.


Edited by cashmax on Saturday 1st August 09:50
I hate flying. The concept off it doesn't bother me, being stuck in a metal tube 25000ft in the air i'm fine with it. It's being confined to a seat. Also the same regarding beaches and pools - 2hrs with a pint and a book is just about manageable. Anymore than that though and I struggle. Can see Barcelona being a favoruite of ours. Easy flight, she can sit on the beach all day and i can get lost up some alleyways browsing shops and eating and drinking.

Hugo Stiglitz

37,133 posts

211 months

Sunday 16th August 2020
quotequote all
Anyone on Ritalin? I didn't realise that amphetamine makes you dehydrate more than even with the heat we are having at the moment. I'm having to be careful around hydration and hydration tablets needed.

When I was younger I never needed dance pills as I was naturally hyper on the dance floor biggrin


anxious_ant

2,626 posts

79 months

Sunday 23rd August 2020
quotequote all
Hugo Stiglitz said:
Anyone on Ritalin? I didn't realise that amphetamine makes you dehydrate more than even with the heat we are having at the moment. I'm having to be careful around hydration and hydration tablets needed.

When I was younger I never needed dance pills as I was naturally hyper on the dance floor biggrin
It's interesting that you've been prescribed Ritalin, as I was told amphetamine-based meds are big no-no for adults.

I'm presrcibed methylphenidate (Concerta XL) and it does help me focus especially in my job.
I try not to take them during weekends and sometimes I feel a bit "down".

Anyone else here on methylphenidate?

anonymous-user

54 months

Sunday 23rd August 2020
quotequote all
anxious_ant said:
It's interesting that you've been prescribed Ritalin, as I was told amphetamine-based meds are big no-no for adults.

I'm presrcibed methylphenidate (Concerta XL) and it does help me focus especially in my job.
I try not to take them during weekends and sometimes I feel a bit "down".

Anyone else here on methylphenidate?
don't worry, Concerta is speed too.

anxious_ant

2,626 posts

79 months

Sunday 23rd August 2020
quotequote all
sambucket said:
don't worry, Concerta is speed too.
I was put on Dexaphetamine years ago and the effects were different.
It's more pronounced but seems to last shorter/exit the body quicker and doesn't have any impact on me if I don't take it during weekends.

Are you on Concerta as well? Do you skip them on certain days?

Hugo Stiglitz

37,133 posts

211 months

Sunday 23rd August 2020
quotequote all
anxious_ant said:
It's interesting that you've been prescribed Ritalin, as I was told amphetamine-based meds are big no-no for adults.

I'm presrcibed methylphenidate (Concerta XL) and it does help me focus especially in my job.
I try not to take them during weekends and sometimes I feel a bit "down".

Anyone else here on methylphenidate?
Why is it a big no no for adults?

Teddy Lop

8,294 posts

67 months

Sunday 23rd August 2020
quotequote all
OFORBES said:
I really struggle to read too. Not the ability to actually read, but the ability to concentrate. It can take me an age to read things, and then because of my OCD I want to make sure I've understood everything and so I read, and re-read and read again because every time I try to read a paragraph my mind wanders off onto other thoughts and then I realise that I am reading but not taking any of it in and so I have to start the paragraph again.

Also, totally with you on the washing the dishes, only this morning I was loading the dishwasher and then after unloading half the top half I then started to wipe down the kitchen cupboards!?
yes, some days I can ingest fairly high level stuff no problem, other days I'm like a dog trying to read a newspaper... Read but it vanishes, I re-go over paragraphs and read the words but my mind just wanders all over.

Millions of stuff besides that, if say someone sticks on radio 1 on site and I'm trying to plot downlights or cable runs, some days it just interferes with my though process, its like I can't mentally multitask and the radio cr4p just dominates my brain space. I've been told this is practically the definition of an attention deficit disorder, never bothered with a test - always found docs to be useless and disinterested unless you walk in carrying a severed limb, and all a private dyslexia test did for me was be an astonishingly expensive way of confirming something you already know - there's seemingly very little help or knowledge for people able to more or less function on a daily basis without needing assistance.

Every time I read something about it another light bulb goes on - reading this thread reminds me I used to wander out of nightclubs and go home leaving friends wondering where I was, always put it down to depression! I could go on and on...

Recently I wonder if its getting worse - I've been procrastinating terribly, wasting days and not doing important stuff and I'm really not a lazy person.

Also is drinking a common thing then? We drink way too much, try to do some "off nights" but at the end of a day it just seems so depressing not to crack a cold one.


anonymous-user

54 months

Sunday 23rd August 2020
quotequote all
Hugo Stiglitz said:
anxious_ant said:
It's interesting that you've been prescribed Ritalin, as I was told amphetamine-based meds are big no-no for adults.

I'm presrcibed methylphenidate (Concerta XL) and it does help me focus especially in my job.
I try not to take them during weekends and sometimes I feel a bit "down".

Anyone else here on methylphenidate?
Why is it a big no no for adults?
I guess ritalin is rare for adults, largely due to potential for abuse.

Concerta pills (I think) are made of valugely similar stuff, but designed to be time released.


anxious_ant

2,626 posts

79 months

Monday 24th August 2020
quotequote all
sambucket said:
Hugo Stiglitz said:
anxious_ant said:
It's interesting that you've been prescribed Ritalin, as I was told amphetamine-based meds are big no-no for adults.

I'm presrcibed methylphenidate (Concerta XL) and it does help me focus especially in my job.
I try not to take them during weekends and sometimes I feel a bit "down".

Anyone else here on methylphenidate?
Why is it a big no no for adults?
I guess ritalin is rare for adults, largely due to potential for abuse.

Concerta pills (I think) are made of valugely similar stuff, but designed to be time released.
Correct on the potential for abuse.
There are also some amphetamine baseds ADHD drug that is slow release but not sure if licensed here in UK for adults.

The diagnosis and treatment for ADHD/ADD in adults is still not as progressive as the US but it has definitely improved in the last few years.

skinnyman

1,638 posts

93 months

Monday 24th August 2020
quotequote all
My son is 7, he was diagnosed with mild ADHD last year, but I don't treat him any differently for it, some people do, which I can find annoying.

His teachers will say things like "he struggles to concentrate sometimes in class", well yes, at the time he was 6, what do you expect? 6yr olds aren't designed to do what we expect of them sometimes, they're still developing, they're allowed to be unpredictable, bored, curious etc. He picks up new things very quickly, but is quick to anger if he doesn't understand something, so new things tend to either click straight away, or not at all. He's very literal with things, he struggles to understand tones, people joking, things like that. It'll supposedly get worse as he gets older, but from when I've seen in him he's not massively different from any other 7yr old, despite my wife feeling we need to treat him differently somehow, I refuse to be one of those parents that shrugs their shoulders and uses it as an excuse.

sparkyhx

4,151 posts

204 months

Monday 24th August 2020
quotequote all
skinnyman said:
My son is 7, he was diagnosed with mild ADHD last year, but I don't treat him any differently for it, some people do, which I can find annoying.

His teachers will say things like "he struggles to concentrate sometimes in class", well yes, at the time he was 6, what do you expect? 6yr olds aren't designed to do what we expect of them sometimes, they're still developing, they're allowed to be unpredictable, bored, curious etc. He picks up new things very quickly, but is quick to anger if he doesn't understand something, so new things tend to either click straight away, or not at all. He's very literal with things, he struggles to understand tones, people joking, things like that. It'll supposedly get worse as he gets older, but from when I've seen in him he's not massively different from any other 7yr old, despite my wife feeling we need to treat him differently somehow, I refuse to be one of those parents that shrugs their shoulders and uses it as an excuse.
You dont have to shrug your shoulders and use it as an excuse, you understan it and try to let him deal with it by developing strategies or if it gets worse potentially medication. At some point in time it might become a problem as he gets older bouncing off the walls becomes less socially acceptable and may impact school work more with exam revising, homework and having to sit and concentrate at a desk more.

what is it you want for him?, get extra help or ignore it and let him under achieve, get extra times in exams or let him under achieve. All those require acceptance of his condition and 'using it as an excuse' to get help.

p.s. you are also describing some autistic traits as well, which often go hand in hand with ADHD, so watch out for that in the coming years usually around starting secondary school when both ADHD and autism really start to affect kids academically and socially (peer group and friends).

Woodrow Wilson

342 posts

160 months

Wednesday 11th November 2020
quotequote all
I'm becoming increasingly frustrated. After being forced to work from home since March, the productive "work" part is becoming less and less of a feature, despite/because of the to-do list growing. I just cannot get going, there is no stimulation. Everything, including typing this, becomes a distraction.

Yes, I know I should plan, focus and complete tasks....

How are other people coping?

I don't want to take stimulants.