The Official Newcastle United Thread
Discussion
TX1 said:
By 2-0 gave up, could not bear it anymore.
Same; I'll watch Newcastle for better or worse, but even I was tempted to shut it off before half time.It's been a good few years since I've seen us put on such a poor performance. Southampton weren't even 'amazing', we were just absolutely s
te. It was like watching a prem team playing a local pub side...The players really weren't in it today and only so much can be blamed on Pardew, but it's his job to fire them up and he seems completely unable to do that.
I hate to say it, but we are currently displaying relegation form....
Exeter City fan here in peace 
As you might well be aware its funny how much our two clubs have in common.
We both play at a St James's Park.
We both play in stripes.
& at the moment we are both utter ste. (We haven't won a game and are basically one point away from being the worst club in the Football League.)
& the reason for this is the same too. We both have a manager who seemingly no longer gives a flying fk, is big mates with certain members on the board and is tied into a contract that makes him very rich while the club struggles with possible relegation and worse.
Hopefully we can both dig our way out. Just don't send us Pardew.
As you might well be aware its funny how much our two clubs have in common.
We both play at a St James's Park.
We both play in stripes.
& at the moment we are both utter s
te. (We haven't won a game and are basically one point away from being the worst club in the Football League.)& the reason for this is the same too. We both have a manager who seemingly no longer gives a flying f
k, is big mates with certain members on the board and is tied into a contract that makes him very rich while the club struggles with possible relegation and worse.Hopefully we can both dig our way out. Just don't send us Pardew.
toon tvr said:
Ashley will gamble that we can still survive and do nothing, lucky for us Southampton sold all their best players otherwise we could have been looking at a much bigger scoreline!
Its a big gamble this season, last season we managed to string some points in the begining and after that we could not win a game.This time we have started where we left last year and is looking very bad and at this rate can only see one outcome.
Until we get rid of this regime it shall happen year after year, the fat b*****d shall not sell and is here for the long term as long as he makes a few million profit year after year and at the same time he can also boast he is the owner of a Premiership club.
The only solace is the club is only worth something to Ashley if it is in the Premier League. So if we're still doing this badly in a months time he'll have to change the manager and I would also expect to see him invest in some players in January as well if things don't improve. I wish he'd either just give up and sell on or set some kind of goal for the club. It seems there is just no ambition other than staying in the Premier League.
Amongst all the distress at the current state of Newcastle United, I heard a good joke today:
Alan Pardew walks into a bank in Newcastle. He walks up to the teller and says: "I'd like to withdraw £5,000 please".
The teller replies "Certainly sir! All I need is to see some identification." Pardew, taken aback, replies "This is really embarrassing. But I don't have any I.D. on me. But I'm Alan Pardew. You can ask anybody around here. They will tell you who I am." The teller replies sternly "I know who you are sir. But I still need some sort of proof of identification. I'm sorry."
Bemused, Pardew asks "is there really nothing you can do?" The teller says "Well. There is one thing. A number of years ago we had this same situation with Obafemi Martins. Obafemi came in without any form of I.D. to prove who he was. So he said he would prove it by doing something an impostor couldn't possibly do. He set a football down in the street outside. He then proceeded to kick it as hard as he possibly could. He kicked the ball so far, we knew it had to be him."
Alan replies: "Interesting. Were there any other cases?"
The teller smiles and replies:"Yes actually. Not two months ago we had Hatem Ben Arfa in. Same problem again. So Hatem proceeds to put the ball on the floor, and starts juggling it with his feet. He goes on to do a number of tricks, and we knew it absolutely had to be him.
"So Sir, is there anything you could do to prove to us who you are?" the teller asks.
Pardew stops to think for a minute. He shakes his head and replies "I can't think of anything at all. I'm not sure if there's a solution here. Honestly, I'm drawing a blank..."
The teller asks "Will that be large or small notes sir?"
Alan Pardew walks into a bank in Newcastle. He walks up to the teller and says: "I'd like to withdraw £5,000 please".
The teller replies "Certainly sir! All I need is to see some identification." Pardew, taken aback, replies "This is really embarrassing. But I don't have any I.D. on me. But I'm Alan Pardew. You can ask anybody around here. They will tell you who I am." The teller replies sternly "I know who you are sir. But I still need some sort of proof of identification. I'm sorry."
Bemused, Pardew asks "is there really nothing you can do?" The teller says "Well. There is one thing. A number of years ago we had this same situation with Obafemi Martins. Obafemi came in without any form of I.D. to prove who he was. So he said he would prove it by doing something an impostor couldn't possibly do. He set a football down in the street outside. He then proceeded to kick it as hard as he possibly could. He kicked the ball so far, we knew it had to be him."
Alan replies: "Interesting. Were there any other cases?"
The teller smiles and replies:"Yes actually. Not two months ago we had Hatem Ben Arfa in. Same problem again. So Hatem proceeds to put the ball on the floor, and starts juggling it with his feet. He goes on to do a number of tricks, and we knew it absolutely had to be him.
"So Sir, is there anything you could do to prove to us who you are?" the teller asks.
Pardew stops to think for a minute. He shakes his head and replies "I can't think of anything at all. I'm not sure if there's a solution here. Honestly, I'm drawing a blank..."
The teller asks "Will that be large or small notes sir?"
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