DIY Mechanics Fail Stories
Discussion
Many moons ago I rebuilt an engine which involved a lot of head work and skimming. Calculations have valves not contacting pistons. On first start up there is an almighty metallic pinging sound and I fear the worst. Remove head and everything is fine. Check clearance of valves on pistons using 'plastacene' and all is OK. Refit head and cacophony ensues on start up. Eventually sourced the problem to a broken gasket twixt inlet manifold and head - the head design used the exhaust gases to heat the inlet manifold and the pinging sound was the exhaust escaping through the tiniest crack in the gasket. A whole days work and a replacement head gasket just to find the cause was a manifold gasket worth a few pence.
Same engine and returning home one evening another metallic clacking sound starts to emanate from under the bonnet. Stop car, open bonnet but can find nothing untoward. Decide to start car and almighty clacking sound resumes. Shut off engine and resume investigation. After several minutes (read about 30) discover the problem is the bottom bolt securing the dynamo (see, told you it was many moons ago!) is loose and has vibrated out until the head of the bolt has contacted the timing mark, a metal pointer, on the crank shaft pulley! Timing mark no longer a pointer, more a smeared bit of metal on the pulley lip! At this point I remember that, when replacing the fan belt a week or so earlier, I had loosened the bottom bolt to enable the dynamo to swivel but had only fully tightened up the top, adjusting bolt!
One lives and learns!
Same engine and returning home one evening another metallic clacking sound starts to emanate from under the bonnet. Stop car, open bonnet but can find nothing untoward. Decide to start car and almighty clacking sound resumes. Shut off engine and resume investigation. After several minutes (read about 30) discover the problem is the bottom bolt securing the dynamo (see, told you it was many moons ago!) is loose and has vibrated out until the head of the bolt has contacted the timing mark, a metal pointer, on the crank shaft pulley! Timing mark no longer a pointer, more a smeared bit of metal on the pulley lip! At this point I remember that, when replacing the fan belt a week or so earlier, I had loosened the bottom bolt to enable the dynamo to swivel but had only fully tightened up the top, adjusting bolt!
One lives and learns!
Within the past hour, I have dropped the full weight of a Land Rover roof, side panels and windscreen onto one finger, which, erm, hurt, and made a lot of mess. And I made a lot of noise.
Undeterred, I went on to remove the windscreen and frame from the assembly. In doing so, I dropped it, and broke the screen.
I am now drinking a large G&T. And I feel better already for having shared this.
Undeterred, I went on to remove the windscreen and frame from the assembly. In doing so, I dropped it, and broke the screen.
I am now drinking a large G&T. And I feel better already for having shared this.
It's been too cold & wet for me to break anything recently, although I am scheduled to wreck the corroded rear brake pipes on my motor in the next week or so.
For the avoidance of doubt, what I mean is round off the unions on the existing pipes, kink the new ones, then leave loads of air in the system. That's the plan.
For the avoidance of doubt, what I mean is round off the unions on the existing pipes, kink the new ones, then leave loads of air in the system. That's the plan.
Justin Cyder said:
It's been too cold & wet for me to break anything recently, although I am scheduled to wreck the corroded rear brake pipes on my motor in the next week or so.
For the avoidance of doubt, what I mean is round off the unions on the existing pipes, kink the new ones, then leave loads of air in the system. That's the plan.
For the avoidance of doubt, what I mean is round off the unions on the existing pipes, kink the new ones, then leave loads of air in the system. That's the plan.
Justin Cyder said:
It's been too cold & wet for me to break anything recently, although I am scheduled to wreck the corroded rear brake pipes on my motor in the next week or so.
For the avoidance of doubt, what I mean is round off the unions on the existing pipes, kink the new ones, then leave loads of air in the system. That's the plan.
Always good to have a plan to work to For the avoidance of doubt, what I mean is round off the unions on the existing pipes, kink the new ones, then leave loads of air in the system. That's the plan.
This was quite a good one for me.
My Vectra is doing about 40k a year, and after many years of abuse its turbo had had enough. So a replacement turbo was ordered. I set myself a weekend to do the swap, having never done it before or anything this in depth on the current car.
I'll write it down as a list in the order I did it. See if you can spot the mistake.
Bumper off.
Headlights out.
Radiator drained, Intercooler pipes removed and A/C condensor unbolted.
Fans unclipped.
Radpack removed.
Dipstick removed.
Misc. pipes removed.
Turbo heatshield removed.
Turbo removed.
New turbo fitted.
Misc. pipes fitted.
Dipstick fitted.
Radpack fitted.
Fans slid back into place.
A/C, intercooler and radiator refitted and plumbed back in.
Headlights back in.
Bumper back on.
Go to the garage to take the tools back and.... f
k.
Needless to say the car is currently running without it and 8000 miles later nothing has melted.
My Vectra is doing about 40k a year, and after many years of abuse its turbo had had enough. So a replacement turbo was ordered. I set myself a weekend to do the swap, having never done it before or anything this in depth on the current car.
I'll write it down as a list in the order I did it. See if you can spot the mistake.
Bumper off.
Headlights out.
Radiator drained, Intercooler pipes removed and A/C condensor unbolted.
Fans unclipped.
Radpack removed.
Dipstick removed.
Misc. pipes removed.
Turbo heatshield removed.
Turbo removed.
New turbo fitted.
Misc. pipes fitted.
Dipstick fitted.
Radpack fitted.
Fans slid back into place.
A/C, intercooler and radiator refitted and plumbed back in.
Headlights back in.
Bumper back on.
Go to the garage to take the tools back and.... f
k.Needless to say the car is currently running without it and 8000 miles later nothing has melted.
While cleaning the chain on my bike, being a smart lazy b i started it and put it in 1st. The cloth snagged on the rear sprocket and pulled my hand in. I quickly pulled my hand out the way and i remember thinking, jesus that was close. looked down and saw i had lost the tip of my index finger..lol
This wasn't me but, a local lad fitted a new stereo to his car. He drove about for a few days enjoying his new sounds then it started raining and the stereo wouldn't work. after lots of head scratching he asked a mate to have a look. The daft sod had cable tied the wires to the wiper motor arms which ripped the wires out the stereo as soon as he put the wipers on.
Johnny
This wasn't me but, a local lad fitted a new stereo to his car. He drove about for a few days enjoying his new sounds then it started raining and the stereo wouldn't work. after lots of head scratching he asked a mate to have a look. The daft sod had cable tied the wires to the wiper motor arms which ripped the wires out the stereo as soon as he put the wipers on.
Johnny
johnnyr6 said:
While cleaning the chain on my bike, being a smart lazy b i started it and put it in 1st. The cloth snagged on the rear sprocket and pulled my hand in. I quickly pulled my hand out the way and i remember thinking, jesus that was close. looked down and saw i had lost the tip of my index finger..lol
There's a few pics on the web of people who have lost the ends of several fingers using this technique to clean a chain with a rag 
430T said:
I may have done the "drain gearbox oil, forget to put the sump plug back in, fill gearbox back up" thing.
Felt like a right tt
I did once get under a car to change the engine oil and inadvertently dropped the Gbox oil instead, god knows what I was thinking that day, but at least it got new oil in there as well....Felt like a right t
t Edited by 430T on Wednesday 6th March 16:54
Zoobeef said:
Just remembered another. Thought I'd be good and service the old fiesta. Changed the plugs and one snapped in half undoing. Leading to the whole head coming off to get the leftovers out 
Had something similar happen but I used a bit of pipe duct taped to a vacuum cleaner to suck the bits out!Ah a topic close to my heart, I've had many DIY fails including covering my parents driveway in oil, but last year took the biscuit.
So I had just got the Lincoln back after six years without it and I thought, why not give it a service! The road to hell is paved with good intentions, so off I set to save a few bob and do it myself.
The Lincoln isn't exactly the most complex beast to work on and most of the service items are within easy reach, including the coolant temperature sensor. The part is fairly simple, a sensor with a bit screw tape pipe at the bottom, I whacked it in until finger tight and then broke out the socket set to tighten it just enough.
It turns out "just enough" is enough to crack the lower inlet manifold pipe.
It also turns out that to replace the lower inlet manifold, pretty much everything that isn't the main block has to come out.
So to save probably £100, a £6 part cost me 7 months and about £700 in mechanics.
Good times.
So I had just got the Lincoln back after six years without it and I thought, why not give it a service! The road to hell is paved with good intentions, so off I set to save a few bob and do it myself.
The Lincoln isn't exactly the most complex beast to work on and most of the service items are within easy reach, including the coolant temperature sensor. The part is fairly simple, a sensor with a bit screw tape pipe at the bottom, I whacked it in until finger tight and then broke out the socket set to tighten it just enough.
It turns out "just enough" is enough to crack the lower inlet manifold pipe.
It also turns out that to replace the lower inlet manifold, pretty much everything that isn't the main block has to come out.
So to save probably £100, a £6 part cost me 7 months and about £700 in mechanics.
Good times.
Not car related but I have to share this with someone.
I work in a ski resort as a ski repair technician. When repairing bases or edges of skiis I use a dremel to cut away debris and clean the mess so I can repair it.
I changed the dremel disc to one that is carbon reinforced to prevent me getting injured by shards. Safety glasses on, dremel on..suddenly the (very sharp) blade flies off and hits me in the safety glasses. I forgot to tighten the screw after changing discs!!
We also use a large robotic machine. I was changing the oil and I did what I'm sure everyone has done on a car-the bucket was a litre too small!
I work in a ski resort as a ski repair technician. When repairing bases or edges of skiis I use a dremel to cut away debris and clean the mess so I can repair it.
I changed the dremel disc to one that is carbon reinforced to prevent me getting injured by shards. Safety glasses on, dremel on..suddenly the (very sharp) blade flies off and hits me in the safety glasses. I forgot to tighten the screw after changing discs!!
We also use a large robotic machine. I was changing the oil and I did what I'm sure everyone has done on a car-the bucket was a litre too small!
The Black Flash said:
Dog Star said:
Last year I was doing some work in my garage and doing some grinding and filing (motorbike rack). Obviously I'm not daft and I'm wearing my safety specs. So job finished and I'm clearing up and I've taken the safety specs off and (schoolboy error) I rub my eye and get some (as it turns out) swarf in it.
I ended up trying to ignore the incessant itching and pain, and rubbing the eye more and more. After two days with a blood red eyeball and people going nuts with me the GF takes me to A&E, quite late on so that hopefully it'll be quiet. I end up with a special dye in my eye and something to make the pupil dilate and there are 3 shards of metal properly embedded in my iris (the coloured bit). I have my head stuck in a frame, a strong light shone in it and the nurse manages to pick two of the pieces out with a needle - I could actually feel the slivers pulling out of the jelly of my eyeball
The third piece was not having it. She then called a specialist out and (all credit to him - it was nearly midnight at this point) he was there in ten minutes. With an extreme amount of skill he got the last bit out. I have never been so grateful. I then ended up with eyedrops, ointment and a patch on my eye til the scratching healed.
Ah, I've been there I ended up trying to ignore the incessant itching and pain, and rubbing the eye more and more. After two days with a blood red eyeball and people going nuts with me the GF takes me to A&E, quite late on so that hopefully it'll be quiet. I end up with a special dye in my eye and something to make the pupil dilate and there are 3 shards of metal properly embedded in my iris (the coloured bit). I have my head stuck in a frame, a strong light shone in it and the nurse manages to pick two of the pieces out with a needle - I could actually feel the slivers pulling out of the jelly of my eyeball
The third piece was not having it. She then called a specialist out and (all credit to him - it was nearly midnight at this point) he was there in ten minutes. With an extreme amount of skill he got the last bit out. I have never been so grateful. I then ended up with eyedrops, ointment and a patch on my eye til the scratching healed.Edited by Dog Star on Wednesday 28th November 08:29
. Grinding with goggles on, took them off to look, then "just needs a tiny touch more" which I of course did without the goggles. Cue shards in eye, and a similar trip to A&E for the needle treatment."Now don't move your eye" said the Dr as the needle approached. "That would be really bad". He'd turned my eyelid inside out so I couldn't blink, but it's incredibly hard not to look away. Not a great way to spend an hour!
I've had numerous oil based fails and numerous electrical based fails..but the most comical was many moons ago.
I decided to clean the engine bay of my trusty MK3 1.3 Escort, so quick trip to Halfords to purchase some engine cleaner,Gunk I think. Anyway I return home pop the bonnet and liberally spray said gunk onto the engine to soak in. This is where it goes wrong...had i bothered to read the can it says dont spay on a hot engine..oops. So yes the gunk ignites and flames engulf the engine bay. I rush to the house door to get water and realise the door is still locked...st.....so run around the car worrying dare I go in to get the keys before it explodes...whilst running around the car like a headless chicken I notice the gunk has burnt off and the flames were out......only one word can describe my stupidity, knob.
I decided to clean the engine bay of my trusty MK3 1.3 Escort, so quick trip to Halfords to purchase some engine cleaner,Gunk I think. Anyway I return home pop the bonnet and liberally spray said gunk onto the engine to soak in. This is where it goes wrong...had i bothered to read the can it says dont spay on a hot engine..oops. So yes the gunk ignites and flames engulf the engine bay. I rush to the house door to get water and realise the door is still locked...s
t.....so run around the car worrying dare I go in to get the keys before it explodes...whilst running around the car like a headless chicken I notice the gunk has burnt off and the flames were out......only one word can describe my stupidity, knob.One that springs to mind from last year. I was doing something or other on the much regretted & accursed Z3 & shut the bonnet having forgotten that I'd left a bunch of sockets on the slam panel.
The upshot of this was the latch mechanism became jammed solid under the pressure & I ended up having to disassemble a bunch of interior trim panels, the wheel liner & a few other bits in order to release the bowden cable & get the thing open again. Doofus.
The upshot of this was the latch mechanism became jammed solid under the pressure & I ended up having to disassemble a bunch of interior trim panels, the wheel liner & a few other bits in order to release the bowden cable & get the thing open again. Doofus.
Gassing Station | Home Mechanics | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff