DIY Mechanics Fail Stories
Discussion
Vanordinaire said:
Changing a coil spring on a mk1 Golf (first coil sprung car I'd ever worked on). I didn't have spring compressors so jacked up the wishbone to compress it, used a handful of Jubilee clips to hold the spring in compression and took off the strut, When I took off the top of the strut, the spring suddenly made a bid for freedom, shrugged off its Jubilee clips and shot up , just past my nose, and on out straight through the corrugated garage roof 30 feet above. Glad it missed my face.
Classic!I once did an emergency repair on a work colleagues motor, was a Rover 75 and one of the front springs had snapped, the spring had also punctured the tyre and made a real mess of the inside of the wheel.
Anyway, I said I'd go over after work and replace the spring for him. So I turned up at these "posh" flats and get going on the spring, now a rover 75 spring is a bit of a monster, old one came out easy enough in 2 bits but putting the new one on was grim. Lucky for me I wasn't using jubilee clips but a set of spring compressors. Even though they are made for the job, anyone who has used them will testify that handling a strut or spring with them on feels like you are handling a live explosive that could go off, killing you at any moment. I didn't remove the strut for replacement and was planning on sliding the new spring on over the strut in situ to save time faffing about with rusty old pinch bolts
Put the spring compressors on the new spring and very gingerly take it over to the car, where I fumble it and the assembly drops on the floor...
It's worth mentioning at this point that the Rover is parked next to a very nice looking Porsche 911. As the "live bomb" clatters about on the deck I am running for it looking back in case it "goes off".
Luckily it didn't but for a moment I was contemplating how miserably poor I would be for the next few months if the potential energy was released from the spring in to the mid-riff of the Porsche.
Silver Smudger said:
Vanordinaire said:
Had an rally prepared Opel Kadett (a series) which felt a bit drifty even on tarmac. Thought I'd run it up a set of ramps and have a look underneath to see if I could see anything wrong. Trouble is, when I got it up on the ramps, I couldn't open the door to get out. Rolled it back off the ramps, door opened fine, back onto the ramps, door wouldn't open. After a couple of times trying and the same thing happening, I asked my Dad to have a look while I was in the car on the ramps. Turns out the whole car was so rotten that it was flexing at the bottom of the bulkhead when on the ramps. Only the doors were holding it roughly in one piece. If I'd managed to open the door while on the ramps, it probably would have snapped the car in two.
I don't understand this one. Were the ramps not the same height or something? Everytime I've jacked up a mk1 Ford Ka I've had problems opening and closing the doors, next time you see one take at look at the bottom front of the rear quarter just behind the front door and I guarantee there'll be a big rust scab there where the flexing of the chassis has cracked the paint. Strange really, 'cause they handle really well.
Cardinal Hips said:
It's worth mentioning at this point that the Rover is parked next to a very nice looking Porsche 911. As the "live bomb" clatters about on the deck I am running for it looking back in case it "goes off".
Luckily it didn't but for a moment I was contemplating how miserably poor I would be for the next few months if the potential energy was released from the spring in to the mid-riff of the Porsche.
Luckily it didn't but for a moment I was contemplating how miserably poor I would be for the next few months if the potential energy was released from the spring in to the mid-riff of the Porsche.
That's reminded me of the time a few years ago when I was parked outside a pub unloading some big speakers out of a Transit (I do a bit of sound engineering), anyway, the pub was on a hill and just down the road from my van was the landlords Porsche....
.....As I pulled a speaker out of the van the spare wheel which had previously been very well wedged in between some boxes in the back of the van decided to make a break for freedom and whilst I'm holding a big speaker unable to do anything except watch it gracefully bounces out of the van and makes it's way towards the Porsche gaining a lot of momentum in the process, just as I think that all the money I'm making from this gig and a lot more is gone it hits a divet in the road, meanders around the Porsche and wallops some railing in front of it, the word relief just isn't enough to describe what I felt.
And then, later on in the night, a pissed up local lad in a Saxo VTR loses control coming around the bend in front of the pub and takes the side out of the aforementioned Porsche....
Edit; I bought the spare wheel it's own special ratchet strap after that. : )
Edited by njw1 on Wednesday 12th September 17:56
Doing some regular servicing and not noticed had left a pair of grips on the top of the engine. 2 days later, oh, engine is getting very hot.
Open her up and see that the grips were of course still in there and had slid down and mashed up against the fins on the radiator causing all the coolent to disappear.
Order new rad which was surprisingly cheap and easy to fit. Went to connect hoses up, bugger, different sizes. Spent 2 hours trying to find and ringing around various motor factors for an adaptor, finally found one a 6 mile cycle away. Just about to head out and the girl friend says 'oh yeah, while putting the rad box in the recycling found this' while handing me the adaptor that was hidden in the back of the box.
---
Not a mechanical fail but working with a friend on an off roader we were rolling the car into the garage and the big nobbly tread bits on the edge of the tyre caught one of the leg pockets on my work trousers. Of course car continues rolling and at the same was time pulling my trousers down. Shout and friend comes around to my side of the car to see my trousers around my ankles and me unable to move as the wheel is now on top of them.
Open her up and see that the grips were of course still in there and had slid down and mashed up against the fins on the radiator causing all the coolent to disappear.
Order new rad which was surprisingly cheap and easy to fit. Went to connect hoses up, bugger, different sizes. Spent 2 hours trying to find and ringing around various motor factors for an adaptor, finally found one a 6 mile cycle away. Just about to head out and the girl friend says 'oh yeah, while putting the rad box in the recycling found this' while handing me the adaptor that was hidden in the back of the box.
---
Not a mechanical fail but working with a friend on an off roader we were rolling the car into the garage and the big nobbly tread bits on the edge of the tyre caught one of the leg pockets on my work trousers. Of course car continues rolling and at the same was time pulling my trousers down. Shout and friend comes around to my side of the car to see my trousers around my ankles and me unable to move as the wheel is now on top of them.
Probably fits here.
I was rebuilding the top-end of my bike engine, a v-twin and had decided to do it in the frame (because it's only the top end).
I'd originally *not* removed the pistons but the piston ring compressor I'd bought didn't "open" and so I could only ever fit the piston into the barrel and then fit the gudeon pin etc.
The front cylinder was a bit awkward but went fine, the back otoh suffered from a serous lack of access, trying to fit the bloody circlip (while not dropping it into the engine, especially as with vertical split cases there is no "sump" to drop) was a royal pain. I eventually managed it.
Only to find that I'd not fitted the rear cam blade into the tunnel beforehand and the barrel wouldn't go "high" enough to put it in (it's fixed at the bottom so you can't just remove it).
Arse.
I debated taking the right crankcase cover off...but the manual suggested I'd need to remove the clutch etc as well so after some thought I managed to get it in by twisting the barrel round, angling it and only dropped the oil control rings out of the bottom of the barrel.
That just left pushing the rings back in with no tool and little access.
So I tried doing it by hand and somehow managed to slip and slice about 1cm deep into the top of my middle finger (I think it was on the metal base gasket), at an angle so it had a massive flap of skin. Blood everywhere, emergency tissue and insulation tape bandage, locked up the workshop and back to the house to tell my wife I was just off to A&E...
I was rebuilding the top-end of my bike engine, a v-twin and had decided to do it in the frame (because it's only the top end).
I'd originally *not* removed the pistons but the piston ring compressor I'd bought didn't "open" and so I could only ever fit the piston into the barrel and then fit the gudeon pin etc.
The front cylinder was a bit awkward but went fine, the back otoh suffered from a serous lack of access, trying to fit the bloody circlip (while not dropping it into the engine, especially as with vertical split cases there is no "sump" to drop) was a royal pain. I eventually managed it.
Only to find that I'd not fitted the rear cam blade into the tunnel beforehand and the barrel wouldn't go "high" enough to put it in (it's fixed at the bottom so you can't just remove it).
Arse.
I debated taking the right crankcase cover off...but the manual suggested I'd need to remove the clutch etc as well so after some thought I managed to get it in by twisting the barrel round, angling it and only dropped the oil control rings out of the bottom of the barrel.
That just left pushing the rings back in with no tool and little access.
So I tried doing it by hand and somehow managed to slip and slice about 1cm deep into the top of my middle finger (I think it was on the metal base gasket), at an angle so it had a massive flap of skin. Blood everywhere, emergency tissue and insulation tape bandage, locked up the workshop and back to the house to tell my wife I was just off to A&E...
Dropping th gearbox off my 200sx
Right pain, box would only come off in an exact position without removing the engine, but I first undid the propshaft centre bearing to get enough articulation to pull it out of the box. Done in my garage, so lying on the floor with the front end on ramps.
Pulled it out, oh bugger, forgot to drain the gearbox oil, can't move, can't get it back in !
So I'm lying there in this rapidly spreading pool of gearbox oil, hair and face covered and boy it stinks that stuff.
Had to throw away the overalls as the gf wouldn't let me put them in the machine.
Right pain, box would only come off in an exact position without removing the engine, but I first undid the propshaft centre bearing to get enough articulation to pull it out of the box. Done in my garage, so lying on the floor with the front end on ramps.
Pulled it out, oh bugger, forgot to drain the gearbox oil, can't move, can't get it back in !
So I'm lying there in this rapidly spreading pool of gearbox oil, hair and face covered and boy it stinks that stuff.
Had to throw away the overalls as the gf wouldn't let me put them in the machine.
PositronicRay said:
Gary C said:
GreenV8S said:
The perils of worn trunnions. I had similar symptoms when the upper ball joint sheared off on my first car. I spent a hundred miles or so trying to figure out why the handling was so weird (effectively only one side was actually steering but everything looked OK). Eventually the question answered itself when I needed to reverse a short distance and the front suspension promptly collapsed.
Trunnions, which pit of hell were they invented !Somebody must have thought 'let's ensure that the forces are spread unevenly as possible to ensure the highest wear'
Does remind me when I was an apprentice, a fellow turned rapidly in his herald, into the entrance of drakelow training centre, trouble is, the engine went straight on..
Fortunately the failure was usually at low speed while manoeuvring.
Bit of a bump....
Just had the 5 fail its MoT due to inoperable sidelight and indicator on one side at the front.
Odd, as I changed the headlights over at the weekend for some that weren't cloudy.
Then remembered that I had to take it out again to change the headlight bulb, and forgot to plug the sidelight and indicator back in.
What a tit!
Just had the 5 fail its MoT due to inoperable sidelight and indicator on one side at the front.
Odd, as I changed the headlights over at the weekend for some that weren't cloudy.
Then remembered that I had to take it out again to change the headlight bulb, and forgot to plug the sidelight and indicator back in.
What a tit!
Long time ago.
Incident Number 1:
Had a sporty little number , the lights were pretty rubbish so decided to add a pair of spotlights.
Decided on new wiring too.
Wired it all up and very pleased with it.
Wired in a seperate switch on the dash for their operation.
I didnt secure any of the cabling as I wanted to check their operation.
Lights on.................... cable insulation melting, .....................panic..................wires glowing red burning into carpets etc
Lesson learnt, use the correct cable not regular flex.....
Incident Number 2:
had a beautiful datsun 280zx.
wipers would park on windowscreen when switched off.
Easyfix, remove wipers, put into correct position, test wipers ............. didnt half make a noise as they decided to clear the rain water off the bonnet....damn it
Incident Number 1:
Had a sporty little number , the lights were pretty rubbish so decided to add a pair of spotlights.
Decided on new wiring too.
Wired it all up and very pleased with it.
Wired in a seperate switch on the dash for their operation.
I didnt secure any of the cabling as I wanted to check their operation.
Lights on.................... cable insulation melting, .....................panic..................wires glowing red burning into carpets etc
Lesson learnt, use the correct cable not regular flex.....
Incident Number 2:
had a beautiful datsun 280zx.
wipers would park on windowscreen when switched off.
Easyfix, remove wipers, put into correct position, test wipers ............. didnt half make a noise as they decided to clear the rain water off the bonnet....damn it
Two episodes, one mine,one remote.
Called on to diagnose a failing Skoda, I was reversing it onto ramps.
The clutch was slipping like a good 'un so I gave it some more revs.
When the clutch got hot enough to bite, the car leapfrogged the ramps.
Cue a sudden lack of rear passenger foot room on account of the
ramps' tops poking through the floor. Scrappy time.
A mate, who had seen me doing car stuff, had a leaky slave cylinder on the OSR
of his Reliant Robin. Keen to learn he grilled me...then I got a call.
He'd been to Machine Mart for a brand new, shiny trolley jack.
He'd put Robin outside his house and jacked it up under the diff.
He hadn't listened anyway so he took the 90d deg wheel brace
and started applying upwards pressure on a wheel nut - it was
very tight.
Robin called time out to have a little lie down on the pavement.
Called on to diagnose a failing Skoda, I was reversing it onto ramps.
The clutch was slipping like a good 'un so I gave it some more revs.
When the clutch got hot enough to bite, the car leapfrogged the ramps.
Cue a sudden lack of rear passenger foot room on account of the
ramps' tops poking through the floor. Scrappy time.
A mate, who had seen me doing car stuff, had a leaky slave cylinder on the OSR
of his Reliant Robin. Keen to learn he grilled me...then I got a call.
He'd been to Machine Mart for a brand new, shiny trolley jack.
He'd put Robin outside his house and jacked it up under the diff.
He hadn't listened anyway so he took the 90d deg wheel brace
and started applying upwards pressure on a wheel nut - it was
very tight.
Robin called time out to have a little lie down on the pavement.
davhill said:
Two episodes, one mine,one remote.
Called on to diagnose a failing Skoda, I was reversing it onto ramps.
The clutch was slipping like a good 'un so I gave it some more revs.
When the clutch got hot enough to bite, the car leapfrogged the ramps.
Cue a sudden lack of rear passenger foot room on account of the
ramps' tops poking through the floor. Scrappy time.
A mate, who had seen me doing car stuff, had a leaky slave cylinder on the OSR
of his Reliant Robin. Keen to learn he grilled me...then I got a call.
He'd been to Machine Mart for a brand new, shiny trolley jack.
He'd put Robin outside his house and jacked it up under the diff.
He hadn't listened anyway so he took the 90d deg wheel brace
and started applying upwards pressure on a wheel nut - it was
very tight.
Robin called time out to have a little lie down on the pavement.
Lucky it wasn't downward pressure or he'd have been underneath it.Called on to diagnose a failing Skoda, I was reversing it onto ramps.
The clutch was slipping like a good 'un so I gave it some more revs.
When the clutch got hot enough to bite, the car leapfrogged the ramps.
Cue a sudden lack of rear passenger foot room on account of the
ramps' tops poking through the floor. Scrappy time.
A mate, who had seen me doing car stuff, had a leaky slave cylinder on the OSR
of his Reliant Robin. Keen to learn he grilled me...then I got a call.
He'd been to Machine Mart for a brand new, shiny trolley jack.
He'd put Robin outside his house and jacked it up under the diff.
He hadn't listened anyway so he took the 90d deg wheel brace
and started applying upwards pressure on a wheel nut - it was
very tight.
Robin called time out to have a little lie down on the pavement.
Cardinal Hips said:
...spring compressors. Even though they are made for the job, anyone who has used them will testify that handling a strut or spring with them on feels like you are handling a live explosive that could go off, killing you at any moment.
In my case the spring compressors DID go off. In my face. Pug 406 springs, where to top plate has a locating pin to position it in the suspension turret. This pin is a long steel spike 
So this thing (no idea how) hits me in the face like a sledgehammer. But harder - I can't even describe the impact - it was colossal. And the bang!
It hit me on the right upper part of my face - missed my jaw and nose and the bulk of the impact was taken by the skull over my right eye - by the grace of God the spike must have been on the part that didn't hit my face.
Ended up with a huge cut right through to the bone where my eyebrow is and a fractured skull, blood everywhere (to this day my garage floor looks like there was a massive oil leak there) and a ride in an ambulance - the crew couldn't believe I wasn't dead. Chap who stitched me back together did an amazing job - you can't really see it (and the eyebrow cover it too).
Very very lucky. I have ones that bolt on now, and also us extra straps as backup.
Years ago I had the central locking relay go on a E30 325i. So I source replacment and have just finished fitting the new one in the kick panel when a thunderstorm I hadn't noticed with head stuck in the foot well decides to drop a months worth of rain in 5 minutes. Stupidly I had not disconnected the battery to do the job and even with the door closed, I didn't have time to put all the rubbers back in place, the new relay shorts out burning out every door lock mechanism.
So bugger that now all door locks are manual. Had to take car to a garage to get the boot lock drilled out as I couldn't get into it anymore.
So bugger that now all door locks are manual. Had to take car to a garage to get the boot lock drilled out as I couldn't get into it anymore.
Two Doh! Moments in one repair scenario
Fiesta ST150 ticking engine, mechanic said it’s a cam chain, you can do that insitu in a long day, 6 days later I finished the job and the engine still ticked.
Bought a replacement engine complete with ancillaries and look, another 6 days later in rain and snow on the driveway, the gazebo having collapsed more than once, another 7 days later engine in car front bolted back up and engine would not start, traced back to the loom which was for a different mark ( no EGR, different ECU pinouts, had to strip out the loom which required the engine mount being unbolted and the engine pulled up and forward because you can’t get to the alternator, replace with original engine loom and it starts and runs. Has an intermittent engine misfire code which I just erase and carry on.
Fiesta ST150 ticking engine, mechanic said it’s a cam chain, you can do that insitu in a long day, 6 days later I finished the job and the engine still ticked.
Bought a replacement engine complete with ancillaries and look, another 6 days later in rain and snow on the driveway, the gazebo having collapsed more than once, another 7 days later engine in car front bolted back up and engine would not start, traced back to the loom which was for a different mark ( no EGR, different ECU pinouts, had to strip out the loom which required the engine mount being unbolted and the engine pulled up and forward because you can’t get to the alternator, replace with original engine loom and it starts and runs. Has an intermittent engine misfire code which I just erase and carry on.
My first car in 1972. A 1954 Austin A30 my father bought for my 18th birthday. With money given to me from relations I purchased 'essential' dash instruments. Oil pressure, battery condition, vacuum guage etc . All wired up and passing through the bulkhead via the steering column. The oil pressure pipe was clear flexible plastic tube, fitted with brass olives. To tidy all the wires up I taped them all together, including the oil pressure pipe. A few days later a short somewhere melted the wiring sending hot oil over my legs at 50 mph!
I've spent too long reading this thread. Last night i dreamt hadn't done up the wheel nuts on my car.
In real life I've only done that once, on my MG midget after replacing the rear drum shoes. The back end started to feel very odd followed by a massive bang fortunately i was going very slowly and the drum is strong enough to support the car...
In real life I've only done that once, on my MG midget after replacing the rear drum shoes. The back end started to feel very odd followed by a massive bang fortunately i was going very slowly and the drum is strong enough to support the car...
Old thread but it also reminds me of a friend I used to work with (not sure if I have recounted this tale before though, but it is funny)
My friend had a Mk2 Escort that he used to do stage rally's in and he needed to do some welding.
Parked on his dads drive, he started welding and hit the (undrained) fuel line.
Fire spreads back down the sills towards the tank.
Heat from the fire snaps the handbrake cable.
Burning car rolls down the drive into his dads large wooden garage.
Whole lot goes up in smoke.
Nice one Nige
My friend had a Mk2 Escort that he used to do stage rally's in and he needed to do some welding.
Parked on his dads drive, he started welding and hit the (undrained) fuel line.
Fire spreads back down the sills towards the tank.
Heat from the fire snaps the handbrake cable.
Burning car rolls down the drive into his dads large wooden garage.
Whole lot goes up in smoke.
Nice one Nige
M47 said:
Cambs_Stuart said:
I've spent too long reading this thread. Last night i dreamt hadn't done up the wheel nuts on my car.
In real life I've only done that once, on my MG midget after replacing the rear drum shoes. The back end started to feel very odd followed by a massive bang fortunately i was going very slowly and the drum is strong enough to support the car...
Almost did that myself on Friday. Doing a control arm on the E39, bush end needs to be torqued under load so I popped the wheel on, did them up hand tight, lowered the car, torqued the bush and then went to start packing everything away. It was only when I picked up the torque wrench I thought ‘oh hang on a minute’. Phew!In real life I've only done that once, on my MG midget after replacing the rear drum shoes. The back end started to feel very odd followed by a massive bang fortunately i was going very slowly and the drum is strong enough to support the car...
Misread torque needed for clutch pressure plate bolts
Snapped a bolt
Bought a cheap stud extractor, couldn't quickly get hold of a goodun
Drilled stud for extractor off centre but thought no problem as it's about to be extracted
Extractor broke in stud
Drilled extractor, couldn't believe extractor could be drilled, obviously soft Chinese s
t
Hole in flywheel now even more of center
Tapped out hole which did bring hole a touch closer to center
Bought longer bolts for mounting the whole plate so as to keep flywheel balanced, didn't have a spare original bolt
Plenty of Loctite applied to the fked up hole and bolt plus all others
Bolt did torque up to correct setting, lucky bd
Covered 21,000 and still good
Now have spare flywheel with new flywheel to crank bolts and plate to flywheel bolts under a bed waiting for the day.......
Snapped a bolt
Bought a cheap stud extractor, couldn't quickly get hold of a goodun
Drilled stud for extractor off centre but thought no problem as it's about to be extracted
Extractor broke in stud
Drilled extractor, couldn't believe extractor could be drilled, obviously soft Chinese s
tHole in flywheel now even more of center
Tapped out hole which did bring hole a touch closer to center
Bought longer bolts for mounting the whole plate so as to keep flywheel balanced, didn't have a spare original bolt
Plenty of Loctite applied to the f
ked up hole and bolt plus all othersBolt did torque up to correct setting, lucky b
dCovered 21,000 and still good
Now have spare flywheel with new flywheel to crank bolts and plate to flywheel bolts under a bed waiting for the day.......
Gassing Station | Home Mechanics | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff