|
DickyC
Original Poster
9,620 posts
67 months
|
When Ford bought Aston Martin Lagonda, they retained Victor Gauntlett as CEO. The early Ford/AML board meetings were not what the Ford men were used to.
Ford man: "How many prototypes did you have with Virage?"
Victor Gauntlett: "Eleven hundred."
Ford man: "WHAT?!? That's more than we had with Mondeo!"
Victor Gauntlett: "Yes, but ours were all with customers."
|
|
|
DickyC
Original Poster
9,620 posts
67 months
|
Two car salesmen met Innes Ireland at a function and were invited to meet him at his house for lunch. They arrived, had a brief tour of the house, were ushered into his Sierra 4x4 and were given an exhilarating virtuoso drive to his favourite hotel for lunch. After lunch, after coffee and brandy, after all his tall tales he made his excuses and shot off to the gents. Like magic, the head waiter appeared and gave the elder of the two salesmen the bill.
"Ah. Er, Mr Ireland invited us to lunch and we, er, assumed he was paying."
"Oh, no, sir. Mr Ireland never pays."
|
|
|
Negative Creep
11,280 posts
96 months
|
Woman goes in to a parts store and asks for a 710 (i.e oil) filler cap. Older ones include someone asking for parts to fit a 24 Ounce Datsun (240z), or booking her car in complaining of poor running, to which the mechanics can find nothing wrong. Exasperated, she agrees to take them for a drive. So she starts the engine, pulls the choke out, hangs her handbag over it and drives off.
|
|
|
Strawman
5,107 posts
76 months
|
The full size clay model of the Jaguar XJ6 sagged at the back when it was left to dry on a hot day, they preferred the rake of the boot that way so it was left like that for the production model. 
|
|
|
DickyC
Original Poster
9,620 posts
67 months
|
Ford Special Vehicles were given free rein, the MkIII Escort and the parts bin and told to come up with something sporty and they came up with what would become the XR3. For the handling and roadholding they found the best results came with using the beam axle from the Escort Van that held the rear wheels square to the road in all circumstances.
The Ford management said forget it, we're not having anything from the van on the range flagship.
|
Advertisement
|
|
|
williamp
11,272 posts
142 months
|
Another Gauntlett one:
When he started procuding the vewry exlcusinve and very expensive V8 Vantage Zagato they were heralded with polyurethane "pop back" bumpers, allowing 5mph impacts without damage
Only they didnt, and owners complained, to be told
"they are pop back bumpers: simply pop back to works service and we'll replace it!"
|
|
|
Chris71
19,999 posts
111 months
|
Strawman said: The full size clay model of the Jaguar XJ6 sagged at the back when it was left to dry on a hot day, they preferred the rake of the boot that way so it was left like that for the production model. I suspect a lot of people on here will be familiar with the Ned the Dog story? When left unattended, Peter Wheeler's dog Ned took a bite out of the front end of one of the foam styling models for the Chimaera. The designers liked the results so much they retained the bite mark as the recess for the front indicator. Knowing TVR it does sound plausible, although some have speculated it's nothing more than a shaggy dog story.
|
|
|
richw_82
756 posts
55 months
|
Strawman said: The full size clay model of the Jaguar XJ6 sagged at the back when it was left to dry on a hot day, they preferred the rake of the boot that way so it was left like that for the production model. Wrong XJ6. The clay story relates to the later XJ6 (XJ40).
|
|
|
iain a
269 posts
96 months
|
DickyC said: Ford Special Vehicles were given free rein, the MkIII Escort and the parts bin and told to come up with something sporty and they came up with what would become the XR3. For the handling and roadholding they found the best results came with using the beam axle from the Escort Van that held the rear wheels square to the road in all circumstances.
The Ford management said forget it, we're not having anything from the van on the range flagship. Quite true that the rear suspension on the Mk III escort van worked better that that on the hatch... I used to drive a van now and then, and was very disappointed to find the XR3 didn't handle as well.
|
|
|
DickyC
Original Poster
9,620 posts
67 months
|
iain a said: Quite true that the rear suspension on the Mk III escort van worked better that that on the hatch... I used to drive a van now and then, and was very disappointed to find the XR3 didn't handle as well. Did anyone do it as a mod, I wonder?
|
|
|
rohrl
3,757 posts
14 months
|
The front wheel arches on the E32 7-series BMW are assymetric, unintentionally, due to an error made at the clay buck stage. Seen this in CAR years ago but I've never checked it myself.
Someone once took a new car back to the dealer with a persistent and obvious rattle. A Rootes group car I think. The dealer couldn't trace it and ended up buying the car back off the customer. When the car was stripped down they found a line worker's tobacco tin inside the sill.
|
|
|
Twincam16
27,239 posts
127 months
|
Chris71 said: I suspect a lot of people on here will be familiar with the Ned the Dog story?
When left unattended, Peter Wheeler's dog Ned took a bite out of the front end of one of the foam styling models for the Chimaera. The designers liked the results so much they retained the bite mark as the recess for the front indicator.
Knowing TVR it does sound plausible, although some have speculated it's nothing more than a shaggy dog story. I know someone who knew PW, and that story is apparently true.
|
|
|
Twincam16
27,239 posts
127 months
|
Negative Creep said: Woman goes in to a parts store and asks for a 710 (i.e oil) filler cap. Older ones include someone asking for parts to fit a 24 Ounce Datsun (240z), or booking her car in complaining of poor running, to which the mechanics can find nothing wrong. Exasperated, she agrees to take them for a drive. So she starts the engine, pulls the choke out, hangs her handbag over it and drives off. My great-grandmother, who never learnt to drive, and suffered from sight problems in older age, would often ask when being taken on car journeys why no-one had ever been to an apparently nearby village called Layby. Bear in mind that in Yorkshire, thanks to the Vikings, there are loads of villages with names ending in '...by'.
|
|
|
rohrl
3,757 posts
14 months
|
A mate of mine's Dad is a senior bod in a big Ford dealer group and they once had a guy bring back a 9-month old Fiesta RS Turbo which had started "making a funny noise". A mechanic went out on a drive with the car owner who identified the whistling noise he'd heard for the first time a few days earlier when the mechanic drove the car at over about 3000rpm. The "funny noise" was the turbo and the previous week was the first time the owner had revved the car over 3000.
|
|
|
EDLT
14,583 posts
75 months
|
rohrl said: A mate of mine's Dad is a senior bod in a big Ford dealer group and they once had a guy bring back a 9-month old Fiesta RS Turbo which had started "making a funny noise". A mechanic went out on a drive with the car owner who identified the whistling noise he'd heard for the first time a few days earlier when the mechanic drove the car at over about 3000rpm. The "funny noise" was the turbo and the previous week was the first time the owner had revved the car over 3000. Slightly more modern version: The last garage I worked at; someone returned a Polo because it was 'misfiring', the problem was that the car was a 3-cylinder and the new owner had never had one before. Back when Jaguar had an F1 team, wasn't there a story about the CEO of Ford asking who this Eddie Irvine was and why he was being paid more than him?
|
|
|
GadgeS3C
1,956 posts
33 months
|
When Jag launched the long wheel base version of the XJ6 in '72 a potential customer asked to sit in the back of the car and harangued the salesman that it didn't seem that different. The salesman politely pointed out that it was 4" longer than the standard model. Mr customer responded with "4 inches! Is that all? What difference is 4 inches going to make?". The salesman calmly pointed out that Mr customer wouldn't be complaining if someone added 4" to the length of his - well, you know 
|
|
|
DickyC
Original Poster
9,620 posts
67 months
|
On a visit to car munfacturer DFP in France in 1913, WO Bentley noticed an piston on a desk. It was made of a light metal rather than the traditional cast iron of the time. When he asked about it he was told, "It is a novelty paperweight, Monsieur."
Bentley's revolutionary aluminium piston went into service in the Sopwith Camel during World War I.
|
|
|
DickyC
Original Poster
9,620 posts
67 months
|
In the late sixties Autocar ran a huge comparative test of British sports cars. Most manufacturers had two, so the featured cars included a Lotus Europa, a Lotus Elan, a Triumph TR6, a Triumph Spitfire, an MGB and an MG Midget. A slalom course was set out and the cars would be rated on how quickly they could be coaxed up and down the course. To ensure impartiality, all the road testers drove all the cars and the average times were used. To ensure the course was at least possible the editorial hack, a Hillman Avenger - a rather uninspiring family car from the Rootes Group - was used.
The results commenced: 1st, Lotus Europa; 2nd, Lotus Elan; 3rd, Hillman Avenger.
|
|
|
Twincam16
27,239 posts
127 months
|
DickyC said: In the late sixties Autocar ran a huge comparative test of British sports cars. Most manufacturers had two, so the featured cars included a Lotus Europa, a Lotus Elan, a Triumph TR6, a Triumph Spitfire, an MGB and an MG Midget. A slalom course was set out and the cars would be rated on how quickly they could be coaxed up and down the course. To ensure impartiality, all the road testers drove all the cars and the average times were used. To ensure the course was at least possible the editorial hack, a Hillman Avenger - a rather uninspiring family car from the Rootes Group - was used.
The results commenced: 1st, Lotus Europa; 2nd, Lotus Elan; 3rd, Hillman Avenger. Hardly surprising really, given that the Lotuses were the only ones designed as performance cars. The TR6 had a sporty chassis, but the engine from a 2.5 PI (actually, given that I'm surprised it wasn't quicker than the Avenger), the Spitfire was a Herald, the B was a chopped down Austin Westminster and the Midget was a Morris Minor. Fun, but not that fast against the clock. But y'know what? So what. Given how annoying it is constantly slowing down for speed cameras and having a modern car scythe remotely through bends without much by way of thrills, maybe there's merit in a 'sports car' that isn't that fast, but feels it.
|
|
|
rohrl
3,757 posts
14 months
|
Twincam16 said: maybe there's merit in a 'sports car' that isn't that fast, but feels it. Like an MX-5?
|
|
