Which "stealth" fast car ?

[Mastodon2]

cjb1 said:

OK, it's not straight out of a VX showroom but it is kinda fun, my lads "1.2" Corsa SXi+ just lowered a bit, nice wheels and knocking out in excess of 270BHP, wolf in sheeps clothing that scares the crap out of VXR's, Type 'R's, 'ST's and the like.

That is not stealthy in the slightest, it shouts "chav rocket" at the top of it's voice. Irmscher grill, Morette headlight conversion, knock-off M3 mirrors, this is a Max Power special through and through. I suppose it might be surprising to find that it's got some go to match the show, but stealthy it is not.

[g3org3y]

Early prefacelift E39 540i touring in 'boring' silver, standard 16 inch alloys and no bodykit.

[r129sl]

Very few new cars are even remotely stealthy. I don't know who in his right mind thinks an Audi S4 is discreet. Screamingly vulgar, yes. Subtle, no.

Anyway, you have to avoid the "sport" or hardcore models. No BMW M-car, Audi S or RS, or Mercedes AMG qualifies as stealthy these days.

I can only think of these:

BMW 550i in SE specification.
Mercedes-Benz E500 (w211 chassis: the 212 is too aggressively styled), preferrably Elegance, maybe Avantgarde, definitely not Sport (what fking sport do you play with it? competitive commuting?), preferrably not black or silver, preferrably tan leather and brown wood.
Mercedes-Benz S600 biturbo (w220 chassis, all as above), debadged.
VW Phaeton W12

No tinted windows, no silly wheels, no DLRs.

[Joyrider1]

Used to quite enjoy the 'stealthiness' of my old Polo G40....no-one knew what it was, and it was only really the little red G40 badge that gave it away. I loved that car....

[g3org3y]

r129sl said:

No BMW M-car

Disagree. One does however have to hark back to the days of spoilerless Ms.


We see: E34 M5
Everyone else sees: old crappy 90s BMW


We see: E28 M5
Everyone else sees: properly old crappy 80s BMW

[big_boz]

MajorTom said:

That is an interesting shout, I wonder of anyone will actually run one of these as it comes out of the box, I got the impression that these were expressly designed for the tuning crowd, who would immediately strip the thing and swap everything to non OEM anyway, "Fast and Furious" style

[contractor]

how about an old knackered out 1995 rover 620ti?

[GTIR]

r129sl said:

Very few new cars are even remotely stealthy. I don't know who in his right mind thinks an Audi S4 is discreet. Screamingly vulgar, yes. Subtle, no.

Anyway, you have to avoid the "sport" or hardcore models. No BMW M-car, Audi S or RS, or Mercedes AMG qualifies as stealthy these days.

I can only think of these:

BMW 550i in SE specification.
Mercedes-Benz E500 (w211 chassis: the 212 is too aggressively styled), preferrably Elegance, maybe Avantgarde, definitely not Sport (what fking sport do you play with it? competitive commuting?), preferrably not black or silver, preferrably tan leather and brown wood.
Mercedes-Benz S600 biturbo (w220 chassis, all as above), debadged.
VW Phaeton W12

No tinted windows, no silly wheels, no DLRs.

While I'll not totally disagree that the S4 is vulgar, although that's a little extreme - Chrysler PT Cruiser, now that's vulgar - it looks just like a normal diesel A4 estate, well my 99 model does.
It's the RS models that have big arches and st and newer S4's have twin pipes but everyone seems to have them nowadays even bogo rep mobiles.

I'll have an S600 Bi-Turbo please.

[r129sl]

GTIR said:

Chrysler PT Cruiser

...

I'll have an S600 Bi-Turbo please.

Agree! Debadged S4 might pass. I don't like Audis because they're so damned good...

g3org3y said:

r129sl said:

No BMW M-car

Disagree. One does however have to hark back to the days of spoilerless Ms.


We see: E34 M5
Everyone else sees: old crappy 90s BMW


We see: E28 M5
Everyone else sees: properly old crappy 80s BMW

Now those were the days of stealth. Two cars I'd love.

[AlexS]

r129sl said:

Very few new cars are even remotely stealthy. I don't know who in his right mind thinks an Audi S4 is discreet. Screamingly vulgar, yes. Subtle, no.

Anyway, you have to avoid the "sport" or hardcore models. No BMW M-car, Audi S or RS, or Mercedes AMG qualifies as stealthy these days.

I can only think of these:

BMW 550i in SE specification.
Mercedes-Benz E500 (w211 chassis: the 212 is too aggressively styled), preferrably Elegance, maybe Avantgarde, definitely not Sport (what fking sport do you play with it? competitive commuting?), preferrably not black or silver, preferrably tan leather and brown wood.
Mercedes-Benz S600 biturbo (w220 chassis, all as above), debadged.
VW Phaeton W12

No tinted windows, no silly wheels, no DLRs.

I would add the 760Li to that list. 540bhp and sub 5 seconds to 60.

[Big News]

Mine's pretty stealthy.

[Rotary Madness]

Debadged RS6 estate in silver, visit MTM for a remap. Instant 200mph sleeper.

[SlimJim16v]

How about one one of the old Minis, where they fit Hayabusa engines etc? Reving to about 14,000rpm might give the game away though.

Edited by SlimJim16v on Tuesday 20th November 21:01

[2.5pi]

http://www.bmwauc.com/AUC/WBANH520X0CR95553/digi-p...

BMW 550i SE touring in BRG with knobs on

Hold me back....

[V6Alfisti]

Lancia Thema 8.32 was the first car that came to mind, not massively quick but the Ferrari V8 makes it interesting.

Edited by V6Alfisti on Wednesday 21st November 09:42

[RosscoPCole]

Looks stealthy to me. Has a 480hp Porsche Turbo engine in the back. 0-60 in 4.8 seconds.

http://www.thautomobile.de/en/th2.html

[GTIR]

SlimJim16v said:

How about one one of the old Minis, where they fit Hayabusa engines etc?

Bike engines should stay in bikes.

It'd be like a mumsnet member coming on here and being a mod. >shudder<

[schmalex]

ikarl said:

CLK 55 AMG

That. Or a CLK 500. 99% of the performance, but looks no different from a 200 Kompressor. My old one was c. 350bhp and pulled to 62 in 5.5 seconds or something silly like that. However, it was the mid range from 30 - 1XX that was mind blowing. It just pulled like a train right the way through the gearbox with no let up whatsoever. It was certainly a lot quicker than the Audi I replaced it with.

Edited by schmalex on Tuesday 20th November 21:56

[therealpigdog]

Audi A6 Allroad Bi-Turbo please.

Subtle (for an Audi), and pretty much covers all my needs with the bonus of extra swiftness.

[billywhizzzzzz]

RoadToNowhere said:

troc said:

Audi S4. Quite often less showy (especially debadged) than the run of the mill S-line versions but goes like stink

Precisely why I have one! v8 / S4 badges coming off at the weekend, too...

Me too! especially on winter wheels. looks like a bottom of the range 1.9 tdi. Fabulous!